Sermon Tone Analysis

There are many people who spend a great deal of their time and life tearing down relationships rather than building them.

This may be without consideration of the results of their actions; however, there are serious consequences.

I.       What provokes troubled relationships?

§  Five things that are detrimental to relationships:

A.     Jealousy (18:5, 8-9) Why? insecurity "the Kingdom?"

§  "…jealousy is cruel as the grave" Song of Solomon 8:6

§  Why was he insecure and jealous?

I Samuel 16:14

B.     Selfishness (18:8) head strong determination

C.     Dupes (18:22-23)

§  Those who are gullible - a person who easily or unwittingly serves the cause of another person.

D.     Gossips (18:24) Troublemakers

§  *Proverbs 16:28* A perverse man sows strife, And a whisperer separates the best of friends.

§  *Proverbs 26:20* Where /there is /no wood, the fire goes out; And where /there is /no talebearer, strife ceases.

E.      Insubordination (lack of respect for authority or another’s position)

§  To God’s commands:

·         *Ephesians 5:21* submitting to one another in the fear of God.

·         *Romans 12:18* If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.

§  To a person’s position:

·         *Romans 12:10* /Be /kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another;

·         *1 Samuel 24:6* And he said to his men, "The LORD forbid that I should do this thing to my master, the LORD's anointed, to stretch out my hand against him, seeing he /is /the anointed of the LORD."

II.

What is produced by troubled relationships?

§  the worst case scenario is domestic violence

A.     Broken Fellowship (his father-in-law) destroying something whole -that which could be.

§  with God (Matt.

5:21-24

§  with others – it’s contagious, far reaching results

B.     Burden Hearts (20:1, 3)

§  *Proverbs 26:20* Where /there is /no wood, the fire goes out; And where /there is /no talebearer, strife ceases.

21 /As /charcoal /is /to burning coals, and wood to fire, So /is /a contentious man to kindle strife.

22 The words of a talebearer /are /like tasty trifles, And they go down into the inmost body.

C.     Bitter Spirits (1 Sam.

18:29)

§  *Proverbs 18:19* A brother offended /is harder to win /than a strong city, And contentions /are /like the bars of a castle.

§  *Hebrews 12:14* Pursue peace with all /people, /and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: 15 looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled;

§  Saul was set on killing David - (19:1, 10-11, 15, 20:31)

§  It controlled his life.

\\ III.

What can prevent troubled relationships?

§  You can’t prevent them from taking place but you can prevent them from affecting you personally.

§  David chose to leave rather than argue the merits.

A.     Choose a friend who has a vision for his life...(14:1)

§  Jonathan was not content to stay in the valley, he had a mountain to climb.

§  He challenged his armour bearer to come against the enemy.

B.     Choose a friend who lives by Faith... (14:6)

§  Jonathan had his faith in the Lord.

§  He knew his only chance of victory was to depend upon the Lord to help in battle.

C.     Choose a friend who gives you his whole heart... (18:4)

§  Jonathan held nothing back.

§  He was a whole-hearted Christian.

§  Note how Jonathan humbled himself before David.

§  In much the same way, we need to daily humble ourselves before the Lord.

IV.

Conclusion:

§  Choose Jesus to be your best friend!

§  *Proverbs 18:24* A man /who has /friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend /who /sticks closer than a brother.

§  He held nothing back.

He went to the cross.

Let us surrender to Him!

§  Saul used friendships, Jonathan treasured them.

§  We value loyalty, but we must carefully choose who is to receive that loyalty.

At times loyalty to one creates a conflict of loyalty to another.

How do you choose?

§  Which person is motivated by seeking God’s best, and which is selfishly trying to tear down.

§  Which is trying to improve the kingdom, and which is coaxing you to weaken the kingdom work.

§  Which will leave you feeling more of a servant, and which more self-justified.