Sermon Tone Analysis

Chapter 4 is dealing with Walk Worthy of our Vocation.

Ephesians 4:1 (KJV 1900)

1 I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called,

What is the job of the Saved, the one who has been blessed

Ephesians 1:3 (KJV 1900)

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who hath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ:

Ephesians 1:7 (KJV 1900)

7 In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace;

Ephesians 1:22–23 (KJV 1900)

22 And hath put all things under his feet, and gave him to be the head over all things to the church,

23 Which is his body, the fulness of him that filleth all in all.

Because of all that God has given and provided for us, he desires to be involved within His body on this earth which is the church to represent Christ on this earth.

We are to do this through the Unity Christ and Harmony of the Trinity (The Father, The Son, The Holy Spirit).

Ephesians 4:12 gives us our job.

Ephesians 4:12 (KJV 1900)

12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:

Conforming us to LOOK like Christ in order for us to ACT like Christ to be encouraged by the RESULTS of Christ.

The most important way that we can do obtain this goal and be considered worthy is through COMMUNICATION.

Communication is the sharing or exchanging of information, along with the emotions which accompany the information shared between individuals or groups of individuals.

When you communicate you not only share what you think about a matter, but you also share how you feel about that matter.

Communication involves this process.

You actually say something and you know what you think you are saying when you say what you say.

Then, others who are listening to you hear what you say, but they may hear what you say in a different way than you intended for it to be heard.

Then the people who hear you, they respond to you on the basis of what they thought they heard you say, and how they felt about what they thought you were saying.

Then you hear what they said, but you may not know exactly what they meant when they said what they said, but you think maybe you do and so you respond to what you think maybe they said.

Are you confused?

That is exactly how confusing this whole matter of communication and talking in family can really be.

The last 3 weeks, we have learned about Commitment.

You have some responsibilities to remove some things from your life, to renew your thinking, and as a result we Revive the things God has blessed us with as gifts of grace in our lives.

Commitment is the glue that holds us together.

It is the glue which ties a family together.

But the oil of a family is Communication.

It is the oil which makes things run smoothly in the church.

It is the oil of conversation and communication which helps us to relate to one another effectively and to say the things we want to say in the way we want to say them.

Today Paul shows us who to how to have a family conversation, a church conversation.

I realize that I have a major liability.

I’m a man.

Men are not real good when it comes to communication in the family.

In truth, I’ve had some 52 years to try and figure some of this stuff out.

I have been trying for over 52 years to learn how to communicate in the family; the first 18 in my birth family; the last 35 years in my new family.

I’m a slow learner and so I’m just doing the best I can to take what I’m learning and pass it on to you.

Unfortunately, this issue in not with just me.

Most people simply do not know how to communicate!

So there is something that happens in churches that sabotage the whole matter of communication and sometimes there is something that happens in families which hinders families from communicating with one another they way they want to.

I have chosen Ephesians 4 to talk to you about how to have a family talk because I think it is the clearest passage in the entire Bible on the subject of communication.

There are many kinds of communication.

• There is the communication of time.

When you spend time with a person, you are communicating concern and care and interest in them.

• There is the communication of gifts.

When you give somebody something, you are communicating with them.

• There is the communication of touch.

When you touch someone you are communicating with them.

But I’m thinking primarily today in terms of communicating with words.

When you read what these verses have to say about words and the importance of communicating by words, you learn some crucial principles about how to have a family talk.

When was the last time you sat together with your family and had a good talk?

What took place on that occasion?

Was it productive?

Was it fruitful?

Was it fulfilling?

I want to share with you some things in our relationships that we need to eliminate and there are some things to integrate and then there are some things to appropriate.

Let me share with you the steps we need to take if we are going to improve communications in our church.

I want to take these verses and preach for a while on the subject: Let’s Talk!

Ill.

If we are going to hear one another, we must:

CONFINE SOME PROBLEMS

(There are some problems which must be eliminated from the whole matter of communication if we are going to talk with one another the way we should.

Let’s move down through these verses and eliminate the problems.)

• In verse 25 he says, “Wherefore putting away lying.”

Confine Dishonest Talk

Ephesians 4:25 (KJV 1900)

25 Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another.

You have to cut away dishonest elements.

You have to eliminate lying.

Lies in a church are the termites of trust.

When you lie to believers it become as termites that eat away at trust.

Lies can be lethal in a church.

When you speak lies and when you deal with your family on the basis of lies, it can be deadly to your family.

According to the Bible we are all born liars.

Psalm 58:3 says,

So we are born with a sinful nature.

We are born knowing how to tell lies.

Unfortunately, many liars simply improve with age.

So you have to learn to eliminate lying.

You have to take away these things that are not pleasing and these things that ought not to be said.

You commit yourself to honesty.

You commit yourself to being honest with one another in your conversations.

• Here’s the second element you have to eliminate in verse 29.

Confine Distasteful Talk

Ephesians 4:29 (KJV 1900)

29 Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.

Not only do you eliminate the dishonest elements in your family talks, but you also have to eliminate these distasteful elements.

These corrupt communications!

The word “corrupt” there is a word that was used to refer to “overripe fruit or rotten fish”.

There are some elements of corrupt communication that we have to get out of our family conversations.

There is a process of corrupt communication that happens in a family.

The process is like this.

Sometimes it starts with complaining.

There is a place for registering legitimate complaints in the church.

Most of us, however, find a sore and we pick at it hoping for a reaction.

At other times it is complaining that is attached to blame.