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Proverbs
 
! Introduction
            In October, we began to look at Proverbs and have since had a look at several different topics.
We looked at the central theme of Proverbs, which is wisdom.
We examined some of the wise sayings which are given in Proverbs such as money, sex and power and how we speak to one another.
This morning, I would like to conclude this brief look at Proverbs with a look at a few more key thoughts from the book.
I would encourage you to read it regularly, particularly those of you who are under 25 because it is written for you.
George Burns apparently said, “If you were to go around asking people what would make them happier, you'd get answers like a new car, a bigger house, a raise in pay, winning a lottery, a face-lift, more kids, less kids, a new restaurant to go to…” There is no doubt that people are looking for joy, happiness and meaning in life.
Can it be found?
Where is it found?
When we read the opening verses of Ecclesiastes, we might think that it cannot be found.
In Ecclesiastes 1:2 we read, “meaningless, meaningless… everything is meaningless.”
Is it that bad?
            Proverbs 10:28 tells us that “the prospect of the righteous is joy.”
So in Proverbs, we are encouraged that we can find a good way to live.
In fact, in presenting wisdom, Proverbs gives us many ways of finding good living, joy, peace and meaning.
How do we find it?
!
I.
Not With Alcohol.
There is something I have observed, but never understood.
When you go to a football game, you see people go down for a snack.
When they come back, if they prefer soft drinks, they may have a bag of peanuts in one hand and a soft drink in the other.
If they are coffee drinkers, they may come back with a chocolate bar in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other.
If they like beer, they will come back with two beers, one in each hand.
Why is that?
Who needs that much to drink?
I think it has to do with their pursuit of happiness and many people are looking for it in alcohol.
When Carla and I worked in the city a few years ago, we got a bit of a glimpse into the way in which people are looking for joy in life.
As the weekend approached, we heard about the anticipated days coming up which often included weekend drinking parties.
After the weekend, we heard stories about how drunk they got.
Alcohol is a common way in which many people are looking for the good life.
Proverbs warns us about the use of alcohol.
Please turn to Proverbs 23:29-35 and let us see what it says.
Now I want to be clear that I do not believe that it is wrong to drink, in the legalistic sense of the word.
However, when we read this passage, we quickly discover that there is a significant danger which I think is best overcome by abstaining.
The passage opens with a question.
As the question is asked, it is obvious that the writer has a point to make - there is trouble here.
If you want trouble in your life, then get involved in drinking too much.
In verse 31, the warning is given.
Although one would get the impression from verses 29, 30 that it is the abuse of alcohol that is warned against, this verse teaches that we had better be aware of the danger long before we drink too much.
If alcoholic beverages have an appeal for us - the colour the taste, the appearance, the romance of it, we had better beware of the dangers to which this appeal can lead.
These dangers are further explained in verses 32-35 with four points about what can happen if we go down that path.
There is the danger that there is a hidden agenda in alcohol - vs. 32.
If you drink too much, there is the danger of delusions - vs. 33 and the loss of self control - vs. 34.
Added to that there is also the danger of addiction - verse 35.
When we realize the freedom that drinking is not sin in the legalistic sense of the word, we may be tempted to drink socially.
It is not wrong to do that, but we need to be careful of the dangers associated with that decision.
With freedom comes the danger of licence.
By the power of the Holy Spirit, we need to make decisions about what is wise and helpful and this passage in Proverbs helps us by pointing where we ought not to look for joy and happiness in life.
!
II.
In Good Relationships
Although we live in a world that is looking for joy in life in this way, it will not lead where people hope.
However, Proverbs does tell us many ways in which we can find joy in life.
What is interesting is that the ways to find joy in life does not have so much to do with a lot of exotic and exciting things.
It has to do with living with wisdom and righteousness in the ordinary things that are close to us every day.
A few years ago, when we were going through a difficult time, a good friend called and offered a word of encouragement, a Scripture and a prayer for us.
What a blessing that was.
One week ago, Carla and I had the privilege of babysitting our grandson.
It has been great to get to know the son of our son.
On November 11, all our children and most of their spouses were home for the day.
We enjoyed a great time together.
Last week one day, I had lunch together with my brother and mother.
These are just a few of the many blessings I have experienced in good relationships.
Proverbs talks a lot about relationships and teaches us how we can have relationships which bring peace and joy and are a good thing.
!! A. Parent~/Child
            One relationship which all of us have been or are a part of is parent~/child relationships.
Most of what is said speaks to children, because of the direction of Proverbs which is a teaching tool for young people.
So children are taught the wise ways in which they can develop good relationships with their parents - and so discover joy and peace in life.
A number of Proverbs begin from the negative point of view.
There are those who curse their parents (20:20); those who rob from their parents (28:24) and those who mock their parents(30:17).
Such children will not bring blessing to their own life or to the life of their parents.
The warning in a number of these Proverbs is that such a person will bring about destruction and in the end will be destroyed.
A frequently repeated theme in Proverbs is that found in 10:1, “A wise son brings joy to his father…” Children who are wise and follow the path of wisdom and righteousness, as described in Proverbs, bring great joy to their parents.
But parents can also have  the impact of blessing their children.
In Proverbs 20:7 we read, “The righteous man leads a blameless life; blessed are his children after him.”
So from these passages we see that parents and children bless each other and bring joy when they live in wisdom and righteousness.
!! B. Husband~/Wife
            There are also words which speak about the joy brought by a good relationship between husband and wife.
Much more is said about wives bringing joy to their husbands, but we need to remember that this was written to young men who were being trained by the king, so the perspective is natural.
The words often repeated to men is words such as those found in Proverbs 5:18 where we read, “May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.”
This along with many others in Proverbs encourage marital faithfulness.
As we read in other places and even adding New Testament thoughts, we know that such faithfulness is not just actual physical faithfulness, but also mind faithfulness.
Any husband who is thus faithful to his wife, and the wife to the husband, will have a relationship of peace and joy.
Since, as I suggested, the primary perspective is instruction for young men, we find a lot of words which talk about what kind of a wife a young man should find.
I don’t think it would be stretching things too far to suggest that the ideas here make good suggestions for wives to be to their husbands, and in fact husbands to their wife.
We find such ideas as noble character (12:4) and prudence (19:14).
A theme that is repeated numerous times is that of a quarrelsome wife.
It is repeated with different endings five different times (19:13, 21:9, 19, 25:24, 27:15).
One wonders why this is so often repeated.
I don’t know, but I do know that whatever the reason, it is not a good thing.
A quarrelsome wife is compared to a constant dripping.
She is described as hard to handle like oil and wind and the warning is that it is better to be in uncomfortable circumstances, like living in the corner of a house or in a desert rather than with such a person.
These verses tell us the importance of working on our relationships with one another and developing good habits of communication.
Yet over all, 18:22 indicates that in a good marriage relationship, there is great blessing.
There we read, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.”
!! C. Family
            Joy is also found in other family relationships.
The mutual blessing of having family is explained in Proverbs 17:6, “children’s children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children.”
“Each group brings honor and inspiration to the other.”
The assumption, of course, is that both are virtuous and thus properly rewarded.
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