Sermon Tone Analysis
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Introduction:
I love movies that have a happy ending.
The guy gets the girl and the girl gets the guy.
It’s happy we love a happy ending.
But notice they don’t show anything beyond that?
Because no one wants to see that.
We love the wedding, no one wants to see the marriage.
Weddings are clean and white.
Marriages are messy.
And we spend so much time getting ready for the wedding, that few adequately prepare for the marriage.
It is always a privilege to officiate weddings.
Not just because you get to be a part of their special day but because you get to walk with them towards marriage.
On that day everything is great.
Everyone is happy.
And the bride and groom have never been more in love.
But what I love more than anything, is premarital counseling.
Because that’s where you tell them the truth.
Marriage is hard.
It’s not always going to be like your wedding day.
You are going to wake up some days and wonder if you can keep going on.
Days when it’s going to be easier to quit than to go on.
But the secret to a long marriage is that when things get tough, you choose to keep going.
Because love is not a feeling, but a choice.
Transition to the Text: Turn with me in your Bibles to 1 Peter 3:1-7.
After dealing with the outside world, Peter’s instructions now turn to the family: specifically the relationship between the wife and her husband.
Many times we think of the problems in the world starting with evil people who do evil things.
We even think of elected officials as enemies of God.
The truth is very simple.
Many of the problems of the world begin in the home.
The relationship between a husband and wife is the most important relationship in the world.
Because through that relationship the next generation comes about but also because it is rooted in creation.
Introduce:
Big Idea: Unshakeable faith is grown in an unshakeable home.
Read:
Big Idea: Unshakeable faith is grown in an unshakeable home.
1. Wives must remember that true beauty and purpose comes from within.
(1 Peter 3:1-6)
Explanation: Passages related to women and wives are some of the hardest passages to preach, not because we fear getting them wrong, but because we fear getting them right in the wrong way.
We should not dismiss the fact that passages like the one we are looking at today have been used to subjugate and oppress women throughout the centuries.
But context is everything.
We don’t just need to understand what is being said, but the cultural context in which it is being said.
In order to understand what Peter is saying in this instruction, we need to go to the end of the passage, specifically to how a husband is supposed to relate to his wife.
In verse 7, Peter reminds the husband that his wife is a “co-heir” of the grace of life.
In a sense she is equal.
And her value as a contributor to the home and society is rooted in her identity in Christ.
It may not seem like it today, but that statement was extremely countercultural.
Making a woman equal to a man, something we take for granted today, would have been met with disgust.
What’s important for us to understand is that it was always like that.
The Bible has always had a high view of women.
All the way back in Genesis 2:18-20
Now, that word helper is incredibly important and misunderstood.
The word is not servant.
It’s helper.
And the Greek word for helper, shows up in Hebrews 13:6
So there is no hierarchy in the word.
But the idea was that in the marriage is meant to be a partnership between two people helping to do what God has called them to do.
But sin and the fall brought strife in the marriage that was never supposed to be there.
And throughout history, this promise has seen it’s fulfillment.
But it’s not supposed to be that way.
Husbands and wives were created equal in value while serving different functions.
Still, Peter says, wives be subject to your husbands.
In verse 5, Peter says that submitting to the husbands was an act of holy woman.
Now submission is not a dirty word.
The only time it becomes a bad word is when a woman feels like she has to submit to a man who isn’t worthy of it, and when a man violates his own part of the relationship (which we’ll get to in a minute).
Now again, this doesn’t mean to be his servant, doormat, and especially not his punching bag.
That’s not what biblical submission is.
Biblical submission is all about the relationship.
And it’s a relationship that is modeled on the Trinity.
Jesus, even though He is equal as God, submitted Himself to the Father.
And together they were united in purpose.
So submission means to seek unity.
Maybe it’s better to know what lack of submission is.
Obviously a big one is infidelity both physically and emotionally.
Hiding things and being dishonest.
Giving in to a request from the kids when your spouse has already said no.
Putting your kids before your spouse.
(Your spouse must always come first.)
Asking advice from your spouse on a certain issue when you know you aren’t going to listen.
Now I know what your thinking, doesn’t this apply to the husband as well?
Yep.
But in the time of Peter’s writing, it was more likely to be an issue for the wives.
Why?
Because the cross changed everything.
And it might be easy for a wife to think she was now free from her husband, especially if he was an unbeliever who didn’t understand the expected biblical relationship between men and women.
Which brings us back to the reason for Peter’s instructions here.
Many wives may find themselves married to men who aren’t believers, don’t fear God, and don’t obey the word.
In other words they aren’t worhty of submission.
Does that mean you don’t have to follow this command.
Well, like we talked about last week, your actions as a believing wife could lead your husband to faith in Jesus as well....when they see your respectful and pure conduct.
And we see many husbands come to faith through the love and prayer of their wife.
Finally, Peter suggests that women need to remember where their true value comes from Jesus and what the world says.
Society has always told women that their value is in her outward beauty so she could attract a wealthy husband.
But Peter reminds her that her value is in her character.
Now when Peter says, do not let your adorning be external with braided hair, gold jewelry and clothing, he’s not saying don’t do any of that.
What he’s saying is what makes you beautiful is what’s on the inside: a gentle and quiet spirit and a godly relationship with her husband.
You can be outwardly beautiful but inwardly a terrible person.
Now Peter gives Sarah as an example of a godly woman because she is the matriarch of the Hebrew people, but there are examples of godly women all over the bible not the least of which appears in Proverbs 31:10-31
All this to say, we need to let the Bible determine what a godly woman looks like.
Application: Ok, so what does this mean today.
Things are obviously different today and a woman’s value is much more celebrated and rightly so.
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