Sermon Tone Analysis

*The Pillars of Community XVI: Accepted by God & Community *

*Romans 8:31-39*

*/April 26, 2009/*

 

 

*Prep: *

·         Read my journal

·         Sermon 61, 57, 58

 

 

Scripture Reading: Romans 8:31-39

 

A couple months ago, I quoted from *Bonheoffer*:

 

“Let him who *cannot* be alone *beware* of community.

He will only do *harm* to himself and to the community.”

He saw speaking of time with God, but that statement is true in another sense: *Healthy* *community* requires that the members of the community are healthy.

It is very much like *marriage*:

 

·         “Marry two *half* *people* and shouldn’t one make the other whole?”

(Steve Taylor)

 

A person is probably not ready to be married until they can be *happy* *alone*, because they will look to the other person for something the other *cannot* *provide*.

Similarly, if a person is *empty* and looks to the community to fill them, they can *suck* the life out of the community, and *leave* as *empty* as before, because emptiness can only be *filled* by *God*.

All community has done is helped them *ignore* their *need*.

·         The *irony* is that none of us are *healthy*, any more than any of us entered *marriage* *whole*.

·         The *best* *place* to find God’s love and acceptance is in *community* – it’s not just “me and God.”

How can we be a healthy community that *helps* *each* *other* know and understand God’s *love* and *acceptance* without being a *crutch* that enables us to avoid diving into God?

That is the question.

Prayer

 

Our deepest and most *fundamental* *need* is to be *loved*, a need that must be *filled* by *you* before we truly love others.

This may pry into some insecurities, so help us.

*Lonely people*

 

In one of the first sermons on community, I said that community is a place where we *belong* and are *accepted*.

The problem is that if we don’t truly believe we are *accepted* by *God*, we cannot feel like we are *accepted* by *other*, even our community.

As I said in the *intro*, we will look to others and either feel *betrayed* by them or else feel like an even *bigger* *failure*.

Even though this church is an incredibly *loving* and *accepting* community, I promise that we will *fail* *you* from time to time.

·         Healthy community requires you be *healthy* and *whole*, your *identity* resting in God’s love for you.

Here is a self-test:

 

Q   Are you *completely* *confident* in God’s *love* for you, regardless of what *you* do?

Do you *feel* his love as well as *believe* in it?

Q   Do you believe that you are a *good* *person*, or are you plagued by *shame* and *guilt*?

Q   When you walk into any group, are you *confident* and *comfortable* just being *yourself*?

Q   Are you as comfortable with people knowing your *flaws* and *failings* as your *strengths* and *successes*?

Very *few* *folks* can answer these all “*yes*,” yet so often we believe we are the *only* *ones*.

This is part of the enemy’s “*divide* and *conquer*” plan.

·         Often, the ones who are *act* like they have it *all* together are the *most* *insecure*.

These *four* *questions* actually address four *key* *elements* that we need to believe that we are okay, healthy and whole.

Here are the four things we need: A sense of...

 

1.

Unconditional love: Does God */really/* love me?

2. Worthiness: Am I *good* person?

3. Belonging: Am I *accepted* by others?

4. Competence: Am I *doing* what I am *supposed* to do?

 

Before we look at these in greater depth there is something important to note: The *first* *two* are mainly *God*-*directed*, the third *human*-*directed*, and the forth is *both*.

There is both a *vertical* and *horizontal* element to knowing that we are okay.

I *reject* the notion that it’s just “*God* and *me*.”

He has designed us to need each other, just look at how vital *good* *parents* are to *wellbeing*.

·         We each have a “*human*-*shaped*” *void* that God will not fill.

We’ll first look at what God has to say about these areas before we talk about what to do about it.

We needed to *know* and *internalize* God’s *truth* before we can change how *we* *think*.

·         “A good *theology* is indispensible to a good *psychology*.”

The problem is not *behavior* – it is the *beliefs* about God and ourselves driving the behavior.

Unconditional love

 

We first need to believe that God loves us – that’s *easy*!

*John 3:16 * For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

The problem is *truly* *believing* he loves *me*.

There’s a t-shirt: “Jesus loves you – then again, he *loves* *everybody*!”

The challenge for *many* *people* is to *own* the truth that God is loves them.

Our ability to believe this is greatly impacted by how your *parents* *loved* *you*.

God is *crazy* *about* you.

You are his *kid* and he loves you more than you can *imagine*.

It doesn’t matter *who* you are or *what* you have done, he loves you.

Rather than one out of several billion, you were made in God’s image, and you *reflect* *God* in a way that *no* *one* else can.

You are a *unique* *image*-*bearer* of God, loved by him simply because you are *his*, not for anything you *do*.

·         “There nothing you could so to make God *love* you *more* and there is nothing you could do to make him love you *less*.”

*Romans 8:38-39 *For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Ä  But notice that last part, “that is *in* *Christ* Jesus.”

While God loves all of his children, *outside* of *Christ* there is something that can *separate* us from God’s love: *Sin*.

Worthiness

 

The next thing we need to know is if we are a *good* *person*.

The answer is *no*, not *entirely*.

We know at our core that we *fail* frequently, and we are plagued *shame* and *guilt*.

·         A lot of modern *psychology* tries to explain away the *guilt*.

So we respond in one of two ways: 1) Try to get the good to *outweigh* the bad, or 2) *stop* *trying*.

Some people think they can *succeed* in being good enough, but that just means they don’t *understand* the *standard*.

But for many people, they *see* all too clearly their *failures* and hence believe that they *are* *failures*.

This is made worse by the fact that our *world* bases our *value* on what we *do*.

·         Because we *feel* like *failures*, we can’t imagine God loving us, yet Scripture is clear that his love is *not* *performance*-*based*.

*Romans 5:1-8 * Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ,  2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.

And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.  3 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  4 perseverance, character; and character, hope.  5 And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

6 ¶ You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.

7 Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die.  8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

The bottom line: we have all *failed*, and sin separates us from God, but God has *forgiven* us and given us his *righteousness*.

*2 Corinthians 5:21 *  21 God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

If you are a *Christian*, meaning you sought God’s forgiveness and now call Jesus Lord and Savior, then you are *holy*, God holds no sin against you.

Ä  We now *transition* out of the *God*-*focused* elements of being whole to the *others*-*focused*.

Belonging

 

This next piece is a sense of *belonging*, of being accepted by others.

This one is the most interesting to me.

I have always been very *secure* in *God’s* love for me and that my worth was not based in what I did – God loves me no matter what.

But I have really used to struggle to feel like I *belong*.

·         I’ve tried to figure out how I was both *secure* and *insecure*; in writing this sermon I understood – we *need* *God* and *others*.

I have always been a *nerd*, home schooling for 7-10th didn’t help, and I am (Cecil’s words) *quirky*.

Social *awkwardness* has made it hard for me to integrate.

I worked really hard to be *accepted*, trying to get along with everyone.

I would *watch* people to try to *guess* how they wanted me to *respond* to them.

It was *exhausting*!

Through a *variety* of things, God (in his time) dealt with that about a *year* before I became pastor here.