Sermon Tone Analysis

“Absalom, David’s son, had a beautiful sister, whose name was Tamar.

And after a time Amnon, David’s son, loved her.

And Amnon was so tormented that he made himself ill because of his sister Tamar, for she was a virgin, and it seemed impossible to Amnon to do anything to her.

But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah, David’s brother.

And Jonadab was a very crafty man.

And he said to him, ‘O son of the king, why are you so haggard morning after morning?

Will you not tell me?’ Amnon said to him, ‘I love Tamar, my brother Absalom’s sister.’

Jonadab said to him, ‘Lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill.

And when your father comes to see you, say to him, “Let my sister Tamar come and give me bread to eat, and prepare the food in my sight, that I may see it and eat it from her hand.”’

So Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill.

And when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, ‘Please let my sister Tamar come and make a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat from her hand.’

“David sent home to Tamar, saying, ‘Go to your brother Amnon’s house and prepare food for him.’

So Tamar went to her brother Amnon’s house, where he was lying down.

And she took dough and kneaded it and made cakes in his sight and baked the cakes.

And she took the pan and emptied it out before him, but he refused to eat.

And Amnon said, ‘Send out everyone from me.’

So everyone went out from him.

Then Amnon said to Tamar, ‘Bring the food into the chamber, that I may eat from your hand.’

And Tamar took the cakes she had made and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother.

But when she brought them near him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, ‘Come, lie with me, my sister.’

She answered him, ‘No, my brother, do not violate me, for such a thing is not done in Israel; do not do this outrageous thing.

As for me, where could I carry my shame?

And as for you, you would be as one of the outrageous fools in Israel.

Now therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you.’

But he would not listen to her, and being stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her.

“Then Amnon hated her with very great hatred, so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her.

And Amnon said to her, ‘Get up! Go!’

But she said to him, ‘No, my brother, for this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you did to me.’

But he would not listen to her.

He called the young man who served him and said, ‘Put this woman out of my presence and bolt the door after her.’ Now she was wearing a long robe with sleeves, for thus were the virgin daughters of the king dressed.

So his servant put her out and bolted the door after her.

And Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the long robe that she wore.

And she laid her hand on her head and went away, crying aloud as she went.”[1]

It is sometimes said that women exchange sex for love, and men exchange love for sex.

Obviously, women are not men; and men are not women; thankfully, the sexes differ.

Undoubtedly, men must be taught to love selflessly, to give of themselves without expecting anything in return, and women must be taught to be chaste, exhibiting a submissive demeanour.

The Bible presents just such instruction in multiple instances.

Should we be surprised that when boys are not trained to treat women with respect and consideration, they grow up to be brutes?

Is it actually a surprise to learn that when girls are not taught to respect men, especially their husbands, they become catty tyrants?

Tragically, we have entered a day in which courtesies once taken for granted are no longer generally present in society, and children are not trained to think of others first.

Whiny pleas for children to “be nice” delivered by social engineers who parade as educators and by parents who fail in their divinely assigned responsibility to train up their children in the way they should go, fail to instil moral standards that honour God.

We have developed an education system that is focused on teaching children to expect their rights, without teaching them to accept their responsibilities.

A general assumption that appears to guide modern education is that people will be ruled by their lusts, and children cannot therefore be expected to control their dark desires.

The evidence for such a dismal contention lies in the insistence of educators on implementing “sex” education that is based on the assumption that children cannot remain chaste until marriage, and that people will not be monogamous after marriage.

The assumption becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy when there is no encouragement within society for chastity or for acting with restraint toward those of the opposite sex.

In addition to providing sound instruction in righteousness, including avoiding a licentious or lascivious lifestyle or warning against proving to be wanton or unprincipled toward one’s fellow citizens, the Word of God provides some powerful examples of lives that were destroyed by a voluptuous or sybaritic life.

Among those whose lives were ruined through dissipation and surrender to their baser self was a young man who stood in line to be king over Israel.

In the process of destroying his life, he destroyed the life of many others as well.

*The Genesis of a Rape* — The rape of Tamar actually began with the seduction of a woman by her father long before she was violated.

David seduced Bathsheba, resulting in an unplanned pregnancy.

When he learned she was pregnant, he attempted to cover over his sin by recalling her husband from the front, where he was fighting against the enemies of the kingdom as one of the king’s loyal soldiers.

Uriah, however, was devoted to his sovereign, and refused to indulge himself by sleeping with his wife at a time of war.

Though David attempted to trick him into sleeping with his wife, so he would not realise that the child with which his wife was pregnant was not his own, Uriah remained true to his liege.

When it became evident that Uriah would not sully his fidelity to his king, David ordered that he be murdered through a stratagem of withdrawing support during an unnecessary and deliberately dangerous assault against the city walls.

Of course, as each of us is surely aware, David’s plan worked to perfection.

Uriah was killed—murdered, to be precise—and David magnanimously took Bathsheba as his wife.[2] His heinous deed was covered, and no one was any the wiser.

In fact, he had engineered the deed so that he appeared to be a hero, rescuing the lady in distress who was grieved over the death of her husband.

However, there is a single sentence with which that chapter concludes that indicates that what is seen was not indicative of the true state of affairs.

The chapter concludes by noting, “But the thing that David had done displeased the Lord” [*2 Samuel 11:27b*].

God sent His prophet to confront David.

Nathan drew David out when through a stratagem he manoeuvred the king, stunning him with the forthright charge, “You are the man” [*2 Samuel 12:7**a*]!

These awful words were followed with a clear statement of culpability from God’s servant, which is found in *2 Samuel 12:7b-12*.

“Nathan said to David, ‘You are the man!

Thus says the Lord, the God of Israel, “I anointed you king over Israel, and I delivered you out of the hand of Saul.

And I gave you your master’s house and your master’s wives into your arms and gave you the house of Israel and of Judah.

And if this were too little, I would add to you as much more.

Why have you despised the word of the Lord, to do what is evil in his sight?

You have struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and have taken his wife to be your wife and have killed him with the sword of the Ammonites.

Now therefore the sword shall never depart from your house, because you have despised me and have taken the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your wife.”

Thus says the Lord, “Behold, I will raise up evil against you out of your own house.

And I will take your wives before your eyes and give them to your neighbour, and he shall lie with your wives in the sight of this sun.

For you did it secretly, but I will do this thing before all Israel and before the sun.”’”

It never goes well for the one who has incurred God’s displeasure.

Certainly, it did not go well for David.

The child that Bathsheba bore for nine months died soon after birth.

The heartache of the baby’s death was the first of a series of trip-hammer blows that would tear his family to shreds, drive the king from the security of his throne, humiliate him by knowing that his own wives would be ravaged by his own son, and even plunge the kingdom into a civil war.

Within David’s immediate family, a number of his children would suffer disgrace and even death—all because of his wanton choice to sin against God.

How dark was the prophecy that the sword would not depart from his house!

How awful the knowledge that one from within his own household would rise up against him!

How dreadful the divine pledge that David would be publicly humiliated.

Whenever a child of God sins, God will not permit that man or that woman to hide the sin—He will expose His own child.

The divine axiom states:

“Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper,

but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.

[*Proverbs 28:13*]

In his defence, Job spoke of the most despicable sins he could imagine, by implication denying that he had ever done any of the things named.

As he builds to a crescendo, he names the most dreadful sin imaginable, and suddenly stops, realising that it is useless to defend himself against people who are ignorant of what was happening in his life.

Listen to the suffering saint, however, as he speaks of awful sins in the life of a child of God.

“If I have covered my transgressions as men do,

by hiding iniquity in my heart,

because I was terrified of the great multitude,

and the contempt of families terrified me,

so that I remained silent

and would not go outdoors—“[3]

[*Job 31:33, 34*]

It is a terrible sin to attempt to hide one’s sin, and all the more horrifying when one remains silent out of fear of what mere mortals might say.

God, however, will not permit His child to hide sin, pretending that all is well when sin has stained the life of His precious child.

Indeed,

“The fear of man lays a snare.”

[*Proverbs** 29:25a*]