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Introduction:
According to most available statistics, around 50% of marriages end in divorce.
And if you look at the top two reasons for divorce, they usually vacillate between infidelity and finances.
But I want us to realize that these two reasons for divorce are much deeper than we give them credit.
The primary reason for divorce is due to the low view that we have regarding marriage .
We are raised on movie after movie that portrays a couple living happily ever after.
Pew Research has shown that 88% of Americans get married because of love.
This sounds like a wonderful reason to get married.
And all marriages should be marked by love.
However, the biggest problem in our marriages from a Biblical worldview is that most people get married because they love themselves and they love how their future spouse makes them feel.
How many times do you hear people say - he makes feel this way or she makes me feel this way.
That is called self love.
I think we can all see the error of extreme self-love and how destructive that will be over years or even months of marriage.
Because eventually, he or she is going to make you feel angry or upset or frustrated.
And what do you do then when the idol of self is not happy?
Yet, I bring up an even more difficult circumstance.
Even in more solid premarital relationships, there is still often a problem.
And this problem is that there is a focus on the other person more than God.
There is a love for the future spouse more than Christ and it’s an illusive form of idolatry.
Of course we should love our spouse.
We will get into that later today as well.
However, the primary reason that we are to marry is to glorify God.
I guarantee 99% of couples will not list that as their reason for marrying.
It is not very common to hear a young couple say they are getting married so that they can glorify God and raise godly children who go forth and make disciples.
Yet this is the exact reasoning we are given in Scripture for marriage.
We see here that God loves marriage and hates divorce.
And His reasoning is because He desires godly offspring and desires the covenant of marriage to remain unbroken.
God is a God who keeps His promises and His people are to follow Him in this.
I understand that this is a tough teaching for those of you who may have been divorced.
But we also need to know that the Lord forgives our past sins.
We need to live in light of the knowledge that He gives us.
If you are married or going to be married - make honoring Christ the reason for your marriage.
Anything but that is idolatry and will lead to marital struggles and not marital blessing.
It is only if we love Christ first that we are going to be able to love our spouse well.
Let’s jump into our Scripture for today:
Join me as we read God’s Word:
Let us pray.
Prayer
Before diving in further, I want to give a couple of quick disclaimers:
If you are not yet married and plan to be married - this is probably the most applicable to you!
It is much more helpful to learn how God intends for us to do marriage before we get married than after we have been floundering at it for a while!
Yet God can redeem our times of floundering as well!
If you don’t plan on being married - I am certain that you will have friends and family that are married that will need truth spoken into their lives during hard times in their marriages.
We cannot advise based on God’s Word if we don’t know it!
Finally, there is no way I can hit on all of the aspects of a godly marriage in one sermon.
Feel free to send any questions you might have by email.
Also, if you would like to meet with my wife Lauren and me for marriage counseling to discuss further issues, we would be glad to do so.
Biblical marriage and Biblical family is a huge passion for us.
Today we are going to discuss two ways that Christ is glorified through the Biblical union of one man and one women in covenantal marriage.
The first is...
I. Christ is Glorified by Godly Wives (Colossians 3:18)
There is probably not one word in the Bible that has been more misunderstood than the word submit.
Because of this misunderstanding, verses like this have been skipped over and ignored by pastors and church members.
This has lead to a disease in our marriages.
Clear distinctions between husbands and wives have been blurred and men have continued to shirk their responsibility as leaders in the home and women have began to dominate their husbands.
Yet as we come to this verse we are given a huge command here for wives.
Wives, submit to your husbands.
Before we get into what that means, I think we need to finish the verse to understand the gravity of this command.
Paul goes on to say as is fitting in the Lord.
This Greek word for fitting is anēkei (an-ay-ko) which means ‘is proper,’ ‘is fitting,’ or ‘is appropriate.’
In other words, by submitting to your husband, you are doing what is proper unto the Lord.
We talked about worship and the many facets of worship a couple of weeks ago.
Submitting to your husband is another way that you can worship God.
He is glorified by your obedience in being a godly wife.
So what does it mean to submit.
Despite what most liberal theologians and liberal pastors preach today, the Greek word for submit here is crystal clear.
Hypotassō (hippo-tass-o) means to obey, to be subordinate, to place or arrange under.
The prefix -hypo that we see in this Greek word is even used in English to mean under or beneath.
Think of such words like hypodermic which means the region just beneath the skin.
Now understand that this word does not mean beneath in value or worth.
This word is actually used in military vocabulary and means to arrange under rank.
The Bible is clear that men and women are equal in standing with God.
Galatians 3:28 shows this:
We see here that we all equal in standing before God.
Yet, we have different roles, jobs, and responsibilities as husbands and wives.
We must understand that equal does not mean same.
Our culture today does not understand this at all.
They seem to think that equality must mean the same.
The ridiculousness of this notion is seen no better than when we see emojis of pregnant men.
Any rational person would understand that a man cannot have a baby as he does not have a womb in which to bear a baby!
But this doesn’t mean that men are inferior to women because we can’t have babies.
We are equal but we have different jobs and different anatomy!
No matter how we try to slice this word ‘submit’ differently we come to the same conclusion.
Paul through the inspiration and direction of the Holy Spirit, commands wives to submit to their husbands.
Let’s look at a parallel passage in Ephesians 5 to further understand this as well:
We see Paul go even further to command the wife to submit to their husbands and compares this submission as the church submitting to Christ.
This is an incredibly difficult command.
I have heard countless examples of women saying - but you don’t know my husband.
If you were married to him you wouldn’t submit to him.
He isn’t worthy of submission.
He is weak.
Or he is dominating.
Or he is lazy.
Or my favorite quote which is: if my husband was like Jesus it would be a whole lot easier to submit to him!
I must admit that last one is true… but I digress!
But these excuses are not godly excuses.
Where else in Scripture are we given an out to disobey God because of someone else’s sin?
Wives who are mothers - you should understand this as much as anyone.
How many times does your child sin against their sibling and you accept the response that their sibling did such and such and that is why they sinned against them.
Little Johnny pinched me so I broke his toy.
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