Daughter's of ZION

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Confession and Purpose  •  Sermon  •  Submitted   •  Presented   •  1:51:51
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Confessing our sins. What we've done bomb our failures. Our fault. Session. Confessing what you believe or affirming what you believe? That is confession. And because we only think of confession in the sense of confessing our sins and on our failures in our fault, We fail ourselves with our faith because we're not confessing what we know to be true. What we believe to be true, which is what the word of God. So Faith, hold fast to Confession of the word. So how often do we really confess the word? Understanding that we quoted. But are we confessing it? Like I can say by his stripes? I am healed, but then the same breath. Feel like my back is hurting. I just notified the confession that you just met. So there are good and bad confection sessions. There's a right and a wrong way. There's a right and wrong confession. Do confession is not just about confessing sin, weakness, and failure, confessing of the farming, something that we believe and that, we believe to be true and our sensors around 14. Do you have a pen to write these down? The first one is what God in Christ. Has rock for us what he has done for us.

The first. 1 is what God in Christ. Has brought us. He gave his life. He was bruised for our transgression. We say that he is by his stripes. We are healed, right? So he took on all of them took on our sins. He did, he went to the Cross. He was bruised. He would spend on he had a crown of thorns placed on his head. He was hung on the cross. And even if that wasn't enough, they decided, the piercing it is. He did all of that. Just for us to reconcile expected. So that's the first thing to our convention centers around. The second thing is what God through the word and the spirit has done in.

What God through the word and the spirit has done in US.

It says that we are to have become what a new. Write an old diesel passed away. He's taking our sins and put them as far as the East is to the west. And remember, no more, right? We taking on a new identity. And the word of God in the spirit that lives within us, right? Has made it to where we're no longer. We should no longer be broken, right? We should be able to love. All of the things that Christ is should be seeing us.

And number three is what? Are what we are to the father in cry. That's something that I did. 250 what we are to the father where his daughter, his son. We are okay. You think of it like this, how special we must be to God if he was willing if it pleased him. To sacrifice his own son.

I mean, do we really think about that? What we are to the father in Christ? where important, especially where his creation he loves us, so,

And number four is what God can do through us or what the word will do in our live.

What God can do through us? Or what the word will do, and I'll do it. What you got to do through it? In order for him to work through us. We have to what render ourselves available. Do we truly do that? We think about it. Do you truly from the time we when he blessed us wake up in the morning to tell me to go to bed really. Truly render ourselves available for him to you though. Because Jesus always said, I have to be, I must be about my father's business. Do we have that same mindset? And then he says, and what the word will do in our live. How often do we misuse the word of God or the words that we speak? Because words can there's this song. Oh my goodness. And it cost about words about cuz it says that words can Can Build You Up. Words can tear you down light a fire in your heart, or put it out. Oh my goodness. I can't remember that. That song. Christy. Do you remember it?

But no, no, I don't but I know it says, Words Can Build You Up. Words can tear you down light a fire in your heart or put it out and let your words. Be like, let your words be true. And the name of the song as word is by Hawk Nelson. So if you ever get an opportunity to to listen to it, but it's it just said Let My Words, you like Let My Words Be True. I don't want to say a word unless it points the world back to you. And it says you can heal the heartache, you can speak over the fear. God your voice is the only thing we need to hear. So we've got to understand how powerful our words are. And if you think that think about How someone may have said something to you called you a name, spoke something over your life that you won't amount to anything or you're ugly or you're this, you that I think about how that affected you. like, even now The body remembers that someone spoke something over there or spoke life into them. Anybody.

How did that affect you?

It is power.

So we tend to want to The confession of the word that we used, we think that it only affects us. And that's not true because what you speak over your children, but you speak over your children. That's a confession. When you say you bad, you just bad. What are you speaking over your what are you confessing all over his life?

So, we have to be mindful of what the word is. It is a convention. So, your confession is whatever you ask the father in Jesus name.

and, He has given. Us the power of attorney. I didn't want to know what the power of attorney is. Knossos Palace.

The number is not working control over. Somebody else's decision and money basically, like, so, you have The power. To make a decision on behalf of that person. So, he's giving us a power of attorney with the word that we speak. And so, we should be using that power to help. Not hurt it.

We should be using that power to help people and not hurt them because work can cut. I don't look here. I have nothing to say about my life and I was the type of person where if you upset, because I'm going to hit below the belt when I come for you. I'm going to say something for you to you that make you stop in your tracks and have absolutely, no words. Cuz you like, I can't believe she just said that and then I'll look at you like you, I said it now, what?

And when I think of that, now, how hateful and evil that was at what I did to that person. Because I would tell them, I would say something to them that I knew hurt them because it was something that I struggle with.

You can take it back and you can apologize, but it doesn't matter because it may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. That is alive from Cedar Hill. Okay, that is a lie because somebody can throw a rock at you and hit you and cut your arm that will heal. It may leave a scar. So when somebody cut you with the word, something will happen to trigger and it will come right back up to you remember, it's right. I got that but they hurt and they can devastate right?

I just wish it was. Emotional abuse is worse than physical.

Let me think about it. Okay. God, created the Earth with what?

So that shows you what the power. Words. so, emotionally abuse is something that can. Tear somebody's wife apart. Emotional abuse has caused people to do things that they would have probably never done. It Alters your thinking about yourself, right? It's something that word coach. We always talked about getting the word of God rooted and grounded in our heart. What is the word that is rooted in ground in your heart is? Something naked. Something you costly heard a parent or a sibling, or a friend or a people that that, you know, always say about you. And so that gets rooted and grounded. So then what does that? Do? It causes you to act or react or operate from that place? Anyone on the zoom have anything?

so,

We should be using. This power that we have the power of attorney the Powerball worth to help people. Because he should be working his own work through us, and he should be living his own life in US.

If we're say that Christ, Jesus is in us, then we should allow him to work in us. So that means that our word should be few and seasoned with Grace. Right. That means that we should not say the first thing that pops into her head, which then goes to put in what every thought into captivity. It has to tell you talked about that yesterday about putting your thoughts into captivity. But sometimes we don't always know what that looks like, right? How to identify that? I had to do it earlier today. I had to about popped in my head. I want to see it, but I have to stop and say, okay. Holy Ghost. Let me check, the it is this going to hurt this person doesn't line up with your, with the word. It is a seasoned with Grace. No, it's not. Okay. You know what? God, look abandoned the name of Jesus. You know, I start thinking about something. I started quoting scripture. I started singing the song. So even if I have to do that 20, because he's quick to remind you. He's quick to want you to react Right to something and say something. Cuz he knows once that word leaves your lips. That's it is out there. It's the damage is already done and trying to repair the damage. That's the hardest part right there. Because even if the person that gives you, you still lost a little bit of their truck. You lost some of their respect. Do you got to be mindful before you? That's why I say, think before you speak? Because you got to say, how would I feel if somebody said that to me in this situation and presenting it in a way, that's even love it. Or I'm just throwing it out there. Cuz right now I'm in my feelings of pleasure. I feel some type of way or, you know, they just, I just feel they need to hear this. They might need to hear, but they may not need to hear it that way. It may not even be for them to hear it in that booty. So that's when you got to go into prayer and ask God, Lord. Give me the word. So that's the other thing. Do we ask God?

What did they do? We consult him before we speak.

How many people have died before they speak like every time?

Lorde. When I read. Gospel it when you can open up the Earth. but when they came to Moses, And was like they were given both of the business, okay? He fell to his knees. Before he even said or felt his face and thought by before he spoke. Mike. And that moment, I don't know what I would say. But he saw God first.

We often think he doesn't care. He doesn't want to be bothered with all the little intricacies.

He is an intricate God. Is he is. So this morning I was getting dressed and I had a previous cross that I had it. I just thought.

And he was exactly what I wanted to discuss that with anybody, but I got to get today. I'm just trying to show you how quickly he's moving can eating an abundant because Austin the earrings. He bought me mess and they didn't get it together. They didn't even know what he's already got them. So he's involved in all of the details. I just wanted to share that. Just kind of me, bring the confirmation. And so, I think what happens, a lot of times we begin to Have a fixated idea of what his movements will look like and when it doesn't look like he's moving quick enough for the way we saw. So we get discouraged with so sometime. When he's so good. You'll do something like a necklace or earrings or did something to kind of give you a little Parker's a parking space. You know, I went to I went to Adkins today, right. I'm the only one of those people that might be one time late in the day. That was my appetite is increasing with a potato. I want to eaten so she got called out. So I got three ladies on my road is like, how old are you? Cuz you expand you girl, you know, I'm trying to get it for you that bad. And so, what did you do with little things like that? The storage cleared out, then after they're glad, they're making me feel like it's okay. And it's just a little thing to do. When we look for him. We'll see how he's involved in all of the small things. They have you were talking about

And it's fine. Why would he want to be involved in the intricacies of the little details? When we when you look around and see what he created? It's very If you study of animal or bird even how they function, what they do have their feathers bird out of feathers or field and they serve a purpose, the reason he created them that way. So you want to see his fingerprints all over your life, right? So why not consult him about No, I don't want to go to Walmart. You know, I always have to literally right there in the door. It's right there. When I need it was right that my thing. Thank you. I mostly like you right back out for a parking space. Yes, I did. And he gave it to me when I lose something. Please help me find it every time, every time. Listen to instrumental all the little details. because,

If you know, like passing it, I know God bless you with the necklace and earrings because all she asked for was the necklace, right, but now I know my God can provide. Now I won't be coming to this phone. Can you help me with start asking him for just a, I want. I mean, why would I do with my heavenly father? You know, so he wants to be involved and as you do that, it increases your face. So then when you Write something big. You like that? Help? You can provide is this list and I know it ain't nothing for you. but what we do is, I think often gets throttled and held in bondage. And it's because Have you completed? If your face seems to be throttled and held in box. It's because you never dared to confess What God Says You Are. We're always been. Oh God, no one ever leave me on Thursday and we can best things. You don't think like that. But how often do you stand in the mirror and say I confess? That I am fearful. And wonderfully made. I can fit that. I am a daughter of the most high God. I confess that I am healthy. That I have no sickness and disease in my body. That I am. Will because my father owns the cattle on a thousand hills. How often do we confess who we are in him? What he says that we are. We always went through because of a while, but I want to hear this, I did this. Okay, or what does God say about you? And will run up and get a, a prophecy, a woman of God. Are you a prophet and you didn't you that are you getting shots in their moment? But how often do you repeat that? So then when something happens you ain't over there tomorrow. Oh, man. I ain't this a quick to say what we ain't, right? We quick to say, on not for somebody, give us a table. Now, going to happen, You are so pretty. And instead of saying thank you, is smiley you like. Oh, no, my hair is a mess today. Oh, I'm the only white.

What do we feel guilty of it? Cuz I don't talk to her before and she'll say, I say, thank you. Thank you, cuz you need to see the same Beauty. The IC and they got these cuz I'm looking at you through his eye. I've been pretty nasty. Show me them through your eyes. so you accept that because of it soon as somebody say something negative about as we quick to be like Yeah, I know. I need to go. I need to go get my hair done.

I just wanted to say something just right there in that space. So if we don't know what to say, what we typically do is cut up, take away from ourselves. So I was in the car when they and the kids were so mad at me cuz I was, I was going with it. So I was like, I was pretending like somebody said I was the person and it was like, oh, you look so beautiful and you are amazing. And I just was, I was practicing doing it because this one girl had said that to me and I said she caught me off guard because she came up to me. And I did say, thank you. And I feel bad later because I feel like I really needed to speak a word of encouragement. You know, like, you know, do you know, you are amazing, but you're wonderful and I kept doing it and I was practicing cuz I wanted it to just roll off my lips. Because sometimes, even if they're speaking it to you, they may need to hear it. Say maybe really in a low place. They may have low self-esteem.

So, what I did is, I kept practicing doing it. So, instead of saying it's just the old restore, this old Harris. I just bought a $5, find a way to speak life back into town. So you don't have to unravel, witless, poke passes we over here, right? Okay.

So we have to be able to accept the positive words. The good words of the word that God has spoken over us instead of always except in the negative and it's it has a lot to do with our society without wiring and what we're used to hearing. 3 - it's all around. It's in the music. Everywhere, right? We've heard it in our house. but we've got to We have got to change the frequency of what we hear. And how is it? How we hear it, because of how somebody can give you a compliment and you take it as if they're coming for, you know, I was really giving you a compliment.

So what that tends to do is cause us to have wrong a wrong conviction and a wrong confession, is a confession of defeat failure and the supremacy of State. When we got the wrong confession, it glorify your adversary. It is an unconscious declaration that your father, God is a failure. If you like, okay boy, dancing with somebody say, say something to you. And then you say did you say that I was a failure? Like no, I didn't say that. Yes, you did. You didn't necessarily use those words, but you said that. So you wouldn't necessarily come out. They got is a failure. But by you confessing defeating failure, you're basically saying that he is, Because how can you say I'm fearfully and wonderfully made in the same birthday who I'm ugly. I'm busy and I can't do this and I can't be texting. You saying that God felt when he created you. And then you're giving glory to your adversary because he's like, haha. I got her right where I want her. Because now, she gave me an opening to creep in and do some more seeds of Doubt, right? So some more discouragement.

So, you got to be like up now. I know who. My God is not a feeling. My God is Victorious. And therefore, I am victorious because I am here is and I belong to him so we can start confessing that. Taking what we do is, instead, we take the testimony of our senses. Except the testimony of the word of God, even when we seen the word of God work with seen it move. Yes, ma'am. Yes, ma'am.

We've moved on but I have my hand up for a while when we have scripture. About speaking thing, death and life are in the power of the time. I just wanted to read proverbs 10 and 11, that says the mouth of the righteous is a Fountain of Life, but the mouth of the wicked, concealed by 17 in my goodness of my bottle. That says that the mouth of the righteous is a Fountain of Life, but the mouth of the wicked can still file a reminder that growing up in Christ me using our plans to refresh up that however, goes against the natural perversity of the human heart and requires the power of the holy spirit with his help. We can control our attorney, but we moved over there. I just wanted to add back to what we were speaking about earlier, a man. That is very true. I'm weak killed killed a blessing. You could have killed a situation. You could have killed someone's dream. Gold and riches with just your work, even your own.

Instead of the testimony of the word of God. We seen it work. We seen the word working, our own lives and yet we still go off of what we see what we hear. What we feel, will stay for the smell over, what the word of God. Yes, ma'am. In the word of God, says, willing to be accountable for Every Idle Word with a good or bad for a man. So I'm going to leave you with this with some scriptures. What I confess I possess. First scripture is Romans 10? 9 through 10. I possess salvation and the things you need to speak over your over yourself in your life and read those scriptures. Isaiah 53 and 5. Everybody knows that by his stripes. I am healed possessed healing.

John 8 + 36.

I possess absolute freedom.

Romans 5 + 5.

I possess the ability to love everyone. That's a big one right there.

Proverbs 28 + 1. I possess lion-hearted bonus and spiritual warfare.

Hebrews 13:5 through 6. I possess the presence of God. Each step I take

Psalms 107 and two opposites. Redemption benefits everyday.

1st, John 2, + 27. I possess you're destroying results by this anointing.

Mark 16 + 7. I possess Dynamic, deliverance, and the devil master. We need casting out devils. Whats 16 + 18. Applejack's positive healing for the oppressed.

2nd Corinthians 5 + 21.

I possess the ability to stand freely and God's holy presence and his Sadie's presents as in Victor. 2nd Corinthians, 6. + 16. I possess God dwelling in me and walking in me. And the last one is Philippians 4 and 19, opposites and supply of every need.

Amen. Amen. Amen.

I love it. I love it.

Alright, confessing to do it this way because if I let you go next we will lose everything. It's going to make another turn. Come closer. I'm in the dark.

Do we got a weekend vlog?

Heard this woman today, say something. So powerful. She said that. This girl, probably testimony. Anyway, she freaking to talk about when she went into heaven when she got there. She saw the books like all of our books even people. That's evil people, that's not going to happen. They got books in there too. Cuz it really wasn't God's plan. It's just that they don't close to do something different. And so one of the things she said, was later, all I know, she started operating in a lot of different places. This roommate stole all her stuff out of her house, all her Furniture, bedroom stuff, and everything is. So she said, okay, I'll come back tomorrow cuz her stuff was still in the room. So she knew she would be there so she can kind of talk to me like where my stuff at and she said, so she was planning on coming back the next day and the Lord told her not to give her your car.

He told her twice how do car to stay no furniture. Now. She they have a car. So she went to the homeless shelter for the second time. I'm not going to go into all the testimony. So she said the lady said where you got seven days and you got to leave here too. So she said, what you going to be said, I got to go pee and talk to the Lord. She went up to talk to them. And guess what? He said? And she asked me. Why am I here? What, what is going on? Why did I lose everything right? He said because I'm trying to teach you to increase your love walk. Order.

In our, how many I want to do some great things in the Kingdom. I'm Siri show, how many how many guys have been walking down the street and see if people that's hurting and broken it. And they, you know, you can just see it on their face that hopelessness that the tire do. I love my children as I was with this out there. If you haven't really been in the drug World burning, that knows a nose and Miss, Pam, know she ain't what happens is what you spend all the money. In the next day, y'all pay attention. I want you to, I want you to open your eyes. You can see it the next morning like when you're on your way to work, when you're on your way to school, watch how many people walk especially during the weekend? They don't have shoes on. They dirty, they're tired and they just got his look like now, I got to deal with my family and I got to deal with the reality and it's so something in us because we carry him. What we want to be able to just go in, speak a word of life. So encouraged them, or if they're Bound by a demon. We don't have to do the livers in the church. What were wanting to do is take this thing. Everything that God has promised and take it out there and Walmart. You got somebody that break up hungover.

I remember we was at the day Centre and the Holy Ghost got so high. This boy start breaking his fingernails off. Took his bra off and everything and I could tell he had start taking hormone medicine because you spread that begin The Grove.

What about those people that started that problem? Having those desires and appetite. Don't know. We can carry that. That we can begin to praise God. Go down in the DM that go in there. Go down in, there are chromosomes and begin to change the desire that they have. So we want to begin to carry more. So God, it said you got an increase in your love wall. Part of it goes right? What you say and what you confessing. It's so somewhere in there. We got to pay attention to the Bone. Watch that all y'all telling you and I begin to see. I couldn't think of what that is. It's on the horse that what you call it thing on the horse when you come.

Why do you got a Bridal in it? But I like, what I was seeing. I need a bright. I just saw the rope light. Can I do that sometime? I'll be like

Then I got to do that because I was going to say this but I can't because I heard him yet. I want to say this because I I know the weight of my words so I have to, you know, it's so basically Franklin the tongue or put up there earlier payments tub. So what is it? Looks like it looks like 30 of them when the 19th and says no, this is my beloved brother. Let every person be quick to

And it's supposed to be most of the time that let me take me to Pastor Kenny Kerr age. I had it too, but we had two different times and we both know that we wouldn't be here not because he was crazy and I could be pushed too crazy, right?

One person. He was my ex-husband. That kid hitting sentence crazy, but it kind of crazy.

Oh God, I caught an x-ray. So what happened was the way the lord gave it to him? Was so speak, just don't say nothing. And if you ever want to You know, he told me to get that up there around people, but if you really want to see you go.

He'll blow it out your ass.

But what he's doing, he's being slow to speak. And in what happen is if you deal with somebody, that used to be bipolar and all the day that it's like, there is no in between.

It's at the roof. And so what happened is but if you open your mouth during that moment, where you born? It's going to be all bad and not letting y'all may not know about those parts. They call what they call those things. It is a kiddle when it is steaming and if you take that thing, that's what bipolar like teaching people, bipolar people, they like pressure cooker, and then you take that talk. So what you do is you have to let it out. Its sometimes we have to do with iPhone. Don't speak this miracle here. So this is where the Holy Spirit comes at night cuz I know how many times that work. You know, I want to say something and I'm like those big quickly in the arise with the holy spirit gives instead.

Ability to just be quiet.

Hey, so what happened is? You just talking about the tongue, when I cut hair sometimes I, I started training myself, even though I have been cutting hair for a long time. I started asking Dolly Spirit, to show me how to cut their hair. And so I'm not so much. I'm not even getting paid, but I just was asked if it would make my make it a lot easier for me, because if I, if I did it wrong, it's going to take me longer to fix the error. That was done it. So anyway, I just wanted to bring that up because We have to learn how to work with the Holy Spirit. And the other part that really stood out to me, what you were saying. What we really believe.

And I believe that the problem in the body of Christ is we make Confession. But our belief is not attached to it. So you can keep confessing all day long in a dream. I did it in a dream II. In a dream. I had pulled up to this house and it was a whole tall demon in there. I don't want to go into all of the details, but I saw it and I had to go in there and I said in the car, to one of my cousins, and I kept saying, God, has not given me a spirit of fear, but I used to watch scary movie. Pumpkinhead Pumpkinhead was his head in the movie was out the building and had to choose yet. It was Sunday. But that's exactly what it look like in the drink. And I saw him in there and I confess that I don't know. I was walking in the house. Quoting, it. Still scare you. Sonic baby, but some kind of way that work. I didn't me, and he walked out the door as I was, in the kitchen. We passed him. So, I got it outside. I thought so. Thanks. It was all me like this. But what I'm saying is I started out, not believing you. But somewhere is that in me. Cuz I spoke back to the very thing that I wasn't scared a bit afraid of. So, sometimes you have to confess it to you believe it. And remember that, it's a possibility. It's not that the word ain't working your face. A work is hard and you not you at your faith has a reason to the place of confession. So a lot of time what happened is we go back to. What was that word you use? You said taking the testimony of our senses, more than the word of God. My senses could say I'm broke. My sister's could say, I'm not carrying the anointing on the power of God, for the word of God says, I've given you everything that you need that pertains to life and godliness. So what happens is the word has a override. What we see. And yeah, this is not a light. Topic. So serious. And I'mma tell you why, because I want you to can. You guys still hear me? I want you to begin. I want you to start paying attention. So, what you say not in the mirror? Pet pictures on them. Put them in the mirror of country. So, I'm being deliberate, but if I'm talking and I'm relaxed. You know how you get somebody who's not guarded, you know, if you don't know nobody kind of each other carry yourself like it's me. I'm no sir. And you know you trying to but when you're around somebody that you know, you also I feel like we will pay attention to your sloppiness. Pay attention to how you really really speak about yourself. Because what you talk Gotti was talking to me about.

Because I was I kind of got an irritated little bit, you know, cuz I'm kind of spoiled.

Who's my daddy?

Anyway, it's so

might not see it to you. But what I really believe 50 to your prayer for Dyna-Glo, what you really did it and you crying but he's told you one time. I did give it to you. And then I love that part that you said about these prophetic words. We're going to continue to help. It's come to this house. The prophetic is going to really start the Lord in this place. So what are you going to do with that prophetic word? That was spoken. Are you going to do? That was good. Are you going to take that board and begin to take that word back to God. Got you sick. That this is who I am. What is the whorehouses in your heart? What God has spoken over. You father, you put greatness in me. That's who I am. I'm not moved by what I see. Stupid pictures to your private confessions. No, you talk about that. The prophet convention, not the priest. But the high priest. What do you say to him? Where we discovered? Thought you told me, you thought your friends. Jasmine was going to be told me you were. I didn't see that. Love. Those are having cars that I've done everything that I know to do now. God why?

Does David mean?

The the man in the Bible, that Jesus healed his son. He says, I believe we have my unbelief. I said that my beliefs, and that's the place. That's so good because he's a loving father at the fullness of what you promised me. And so we don't become religious in this private place. You don't want to be religious.

No, it's not the deal but not with him. That's not the place and that place is.

Psychic reading. Warfare with demons and devils and principalities and amps. But not with God. Come on yourself. You go before the throne of grace, but there's a steal of a sense of humility. I kind of think you did. I hear that? You allow me to be with.

Right now. When I started praying that prayer, we all went to the bathroom.

It's just a chip out of understanding. How do I have to wait to get home and get in my closet before I go and get your thoughts for what? When I begin to really acknowledge Him? And I begin to say those words, my spirit in the yard with it. That's why it's so important to leave because

Is it is what happens? It could be as long as you put it.

That you get lost in your work.

You ain't worried about what it sound like, even if you just start weeping and crying when we see your your your, your love towards him and break something out. That's why sometimes a jump in the shower yet. It's jumping and shouting for sometime instead Liberty. Sometimes it's a freedom when when we used to go to king of kings. That was one flag. Her name was um, Oh, that girl named Flora.

Oh, I can't think of her name. Anyway, she was real quiet. This a whole lot real artistic with every now and then.

Marcus wife.

What was that battle?

The opinions of people religion so you can get somebody else go to that ship, Queen Creek.

When whatever was on her broke? My husband said it broke something off of him. See it broke something off of me and I'm just like that. It's like, it was like a when you throw up a pebble in a pond in the Ripple. That's what it was like, it broke. It was like a ripple effect all from the house, but it wasn't just like I mean with the spirit of the Lord, is there a liberty liberty. Those are the two things would be looking for the cloud. And I'm not saying, I'm not, cuz I am, but I'm telling you, when they come in the room. You don't want to go home. If you haven't noticed, sometimes it ain't that we want to Fellowship was like it's out of the office to but when when the presence of God is here.

If freedom and soul. Speaking the biggest real quick. I haven't identified to me she has yet cuz she just started dancing Trinity. And Peggy their dance is Glory. There's a different Grace that they carry.

I'll put the song to it so you can identify Jose and that it's that high up there.

Morphe. I was on the other one day in a demon came in here and I had prayed that he left, but she's like Mama move. She pushed me off the Altar and she went in and like the stuff now, but what happened when she puts me off and she began to go in and say okay wherever he went first and went back there. You kind of head and winning. So, what is it? I don't know nothing about that. You just started seeing one day. You know what I'm saying? It's so sometimes I may ask you cuz I want to see where how you guys are advancing and some of your kiss. Is it opening up or are you closing it up? Go to the fair. I want to see that no more. So I brought that up because I do what we've done in the body of Christ. Sometimes what we do is we see one star restaurant in there and we see this star discharge starts shining. But for some reason we're going to that store, we don't want to do that in this house. Every Star. The way it's a telescope. We think a star looks like lately. Play everything, I forgot.

But when they took that telescope out there, do stars have color. Shapes and it's all the different. So we got that. I know them by name. They look different. They're not like what they taught us in school and maybe they didn't know no better, but they're not the same week. They made those stars. Look the same and be different sizes know. They all look different and they been able to discover that yes or no.

When I could just like one star, no matter. How did more bride it is? Okay. Did you like not really anything? It's a start and then really spectacular about it. But when you see all the stars in the night sky as a whole, not like that's a beautiful, all the different sizes of steak. Do you know that mean that's beautiful to me? Which of those stars shine brightest? And I talked and talked and where else.

But it Country Public. Yes, that's fine. I will just lay out in the grass with my kids. Isn't we did, look at the stars. Awesome. I think there's only one. That's the main thing is. I want to bring that. You got anybody, want to say anything real quick about the confession before give her an end of time.

No, ma'am.

Go. I saw the baby trying to tell you to say something.

Confess, but pay attention guy. I'll change my mind.

And confessing we ought to also hold each other accountable. When we hear each other talking bad about ourselves or somebody else or speaking, in a way. We're not supposed to, we need to hold each other accountable, the words that iron sharpens iron. Zyzz friends do the Bible each other and so let's be mindful of that if you see me cuz up check me. Amy and Fabian all today. Hello.

All today, I was with the guy, I was over here saying, something about myself now that I like. I know now the Lord has been speaking to me about it more. So when you said it and then she kept saying that today, I need it. Like I really do need that like extremely hard on myself when it comes to life, just myself in grand total.

Hey, man. All right, you don't check yourself.

Okay, Miss Laura. Let's go.

I didn't really have nothing because I was in pain, but I had told somebody they couldn't come to my house cuz I did not want them to come to my house. But I said I was going to Bible study so I can cuz I ain't nothing in my house. but,

I was I was asked to share on purpose and with him either way, my mind works. It's just, it's just a little different, the dictionary is nice. It's fine. It's deadly, but a Biblical dictionary helps me, see, or understand a little better. And I chose the second definition for purpose and it says intention. It says design, it says this sense. However, it is hardly to be distinguished from the former as purpose. Always includes the end in view, every purpose is established by counsel. And if we go to that, it says being predestined. According to the purpose of him who work in all things, after the counsel of his own will, And I got this one. So what I got from it, I was just sitting there cuz I'm one of those people. I don't really, I would like to speak. But years ago, I made a mistake and I said, God, use me as your pulpit. And that hasn't gone away. It's just intensified over the years. But one thing will God made mine. He didn't he didn't just make that with everything else. He just made the Sun, the moon, and stars the water. Everything. He just made but where he said when it came to making Maddie. He said, let us reason to keep it, let us. So we came to himself. He came to himself in the deity. That is the Trinity that we now have the definition of and he said, let us talk to the angels, but he talked to the three personalities of himself, because there was a purpose in the let us because before Jesus Was Made manifested In the Flesh, they had to make the money. So God already knew what we were going to. Do you? Add a new lady was going to eat the piece of fruit and Adam was going to eat the piece of fruit with her and blame blame the woman. But so he when he said let us that plan was already there. So if you Adam was made on purpose for the purpose of Jesus being able to come through. So what ends up happening? Is it purpose? One thing we always question is, why was I made like this? Or what is this from? A lot of time? Sometimes it's always the same with you. But other times the flow is to attract those people that are assigned to that gate. So we have Godly case and we have the money cake. That's what we have. Good clothes and buy clothes. We have a lot of immature. That's why you don't have the discernment of those things anymore. But what ends up happening is because you are the handiwork of God. The enemy has his own work that he wants to do, but he's just not happy cuz he can't create anything. You can imitate everything. So what ended up happening with the purpose is we just learned about the power of confession words. All have a purpose. They were already pretty designs when the world was created. You realize in the Bible, all those words have a different meaning, but then in the kingdom of darkness, they have a different meaning as well. What we fail to realize is that your words are deciphered by whose handiwork they are. So it, a curse is not a curse because the word sounds bad, a person's accursed because of what the word was designated to do. When God said, let there be, there was nothing like, okay, maybe he's kind of sort of, there was a purpose behind it, because it came from a Divine realm because it came from this Divine realm, everything associated with, it was, Not want to be first. Like, I remember years ago. I learned the f word, Med fornication, under consent of the king.

Inside a bad at all, but it's a curse word to us. And I was okay, got it. Why is this a curse word? He said, look at the word again to be contented other. It came sense was made to be revealed in the concealed of marriage. That's why I wanted the reason is a curse word. Yeah, we took it and we make it all these other things but ultimately its original meaning brought glory to a King. When he was a man and that King is always controlled by a spiritual King which is the devil and ask him. If he can have the King of Persia and the Prince of Persia, ain't no prints on the back of the angel, you have it. So when you read it, you see there's a perfect turn it down, just a little bit.

Thank you. So what ended up happening is when you look at the purpose for your words you end up kind of exercise in your kingdom. So negative words with me for a negative confession also are associated with a negative purpose and everything that is a negative. Purpose actually comes from the negative Kingdom with you, the kingdom of darkness. So are we just going to get down to it? The purpose of your words, may not even start with you. The purpose of your word starts with the kingdom that, you know, basic signing off on you saying that, like the meth. You know, you're ugly on the myth that we we have, we have this whole thing. No one grows up with a image problem unless it's too extreme. Either you think you ugly or you can is never in the middle. And what that is because the enemy knows he can take those extremes. But if you are centered, most time you are Christ Center or you're grounded, he can't take you into cyberspace. He can't make you go from, you know, Jamie to Billy. He can't take you from, you know, this beautiful young lady to your soul, can see that nobody can stand to be around you and then when you actually need help because secretly don't even that boost you up in the morning time or turn you up at night, knowing to be around you to help her in to see because your work just cut people off. That's why that confession is so important. Because the confession your purpose will work handed have a negative confession will work with a negative purpose. If you have a negative confessions, you always have something bad to say about yourself, 95% of the time. There's a negative assignment to fulfill that negative confession. The moment you start to say what God has said about you. If you don't say what I say about you. That's how you want to be a pastor. I promise you the deal is going to fight you. Yes, but anything that you need the kind of help you go along that way of being a pastor or being a minister with doctor, and it will shed light on round you, some of those negative confessions cannot dwell in you. That's why when you start to upgrade, you lose friends because your friends or your confession, you. Never had a manager. One time. They had stole about $3,000 from the register at work. And he's mad. He said, show me your friends and I'll show you who you are, and I never thought I'd be with you. Because what he was saying is, if you hang around thieves, you become a thief by Council. My counselor to the word that was out there and dealt with Council because counseling is not just say what you think I should do counseling is who you hang out with because it adversely. That's why I didn't, you know, they say you never actually said no, it didn't give the word for intercourse. It says, lay, he who lays with a horse becomes one with the horse. Because every time you're around someone, your atmosphere is gold. And normally the most dominant atmosphere, which is the most dominant personality when that's why you have those good girls, hang out the bad girls and out the back. The Good Girls Bad Girl. Because the most dominant personality normally wins and it on purpose, that's why the enemy will go. And he would take those gifts that are more dominant. That's why you see anybody who's a prophet today that don't come out. Today was a some deep set. Date, we're not you know what they're up on this Pulpit. They have all these folks behind them while I was doing this, I was doing that. I was just because the purpose on their life had to also be matched with a purpose in the Dark Realm. So your Divine Purpose is as great as your demonic struggle because it has to shut you down. Jezebel did not go up against Moses, was up against Moses, because there had to be a matching of the spiritual, that was there, because there's a purpose for it, but that in Ephesians the two inside, it says, for we are God's Own handiwork. This is in the album by his workmanship created in Christ Image. Born Anew that we may do those good works, which God predestined planned it before have for us, taking Pat's which he prepared ahead of time that we should work walk in them living the good life, which he, pre-arranged, and made ready. For us to live and all those words. Kind of bad when you think about it, cuz there's a doctrine of predestination, that's not really, the will of God because it's not broken down. The way. God would have it wrote down and we have our prearranged marriages. Nobody likes to hear that because it gives the nature of control. But when it's something about prearranged and predestined, it's because you were already created, before you were created by the uncreated one. Because when he made you, he said, let us make man in our image. So that means the same way when he spoke the river cave when he spoke. Where is King. What do you spell all these things happened? You already created because you are not just the spoken word of God. You would have thought of God, and that, you would have had to work of God. Cuz they came together. He thought about it, they came together and they spoke, and then they did it. So, when, when it comes to purposes or fulfilling, a purpose on your life or anything like that, even with your confessions believe it or not, your concern. Starting your mind. Then you speak it and then you do it. That's how you work. Because that's how you were purposely created. You were created to think to speak, and then to do, even if you don't want to do it. That's why the negative always sometimes outweigh the positive because you only speak positively around positive people. And if you are negative, that means you're allowed to negative person because it said, let us. So you got a New York Avenue. Some people like who's all there? Me myself and I cuz I have no idea. I'll be in my hole in my whole house. You know what? You should do that, you should do this, okay? How do you like I literally floor get up at 3 a.m. To get up at 6 a.m.

You know, you are, you are a council in yourself. That is why you need a Triune God. That's why you have built the polyester. They serve all these other guys because purposely you are not created to serve one. God, you were deserve a three in one God, who is able to relate to all three and one facet of you. That's why I know one who is a heathen. So to speak worshipping other gods. They normally have another God associated with them. There's normally another demigod with that. There's normally another Spirit. There's no, I'm not going to accept it because you were purposely created like him and he is free to wander for you at 3 and once and you cannot submit if it's not equal like we learned any any qualities in life and you not done until the problem is equal. Until this side matches this side. You're not done. That's why people get filled with demon. After payment after dinner cuz purposely the way you were created was to be like him. He did it on purpose for a purpose. That's why you trying to be size boy. No demon can fill that void because it's the shape of Eternity and he is the only one who feels entitled because he is eternal in his bed. But then it says this is that the purposes of a person's. Heart are deep Waters. This isn't an IV, but one who has Insight, drop them out. You can't have inside. If you don't have to purchase the draw thing out. That's why certain Ministries get certain people is not because they're wrong Ministries. It's just because there's an assignment. There is a purpose in the last. There's an intention. That's why you have Deliverance Ministry that you go with that Ministry and all the people are former drug addicts. And the people who get drawn to them are drug addicts, or you going to another church and their their hold, their whole thing is the glory. The two of them, the glory Ian is worth it because the purpose and or the assignment and or the intention of God on their life is to dismantle that yoke that the enemy set up. That's why I eat the profit. They can operate in all of them. The only one who did that was Jesus. Moses had the law is it wasn't at the law in the heat. In fact, he lost his probably because of the law because he disobeyed, God hit that right? There was no Rachel Moses. Elijah. He work and power a relationship. But ultimately Elijah by his work. He was undone. It was his word at all, that far from heaven and his word that kind of make God be okay going on with this person. This person this person I'm taking you because he said I'm no better than my father's. So your purpose is always, you know, it says, they teach you. There's always two forces 1/4 on this side of town, for some the other side for every action. There's an equal opposite reaction. So for every purpose, there's an equal but opposite anti purpose. I like that word. I thought purpose. So ultimately when you look at this your confession and your act like infection always at war with each other. That's why the Apostle Paul said there is a war in my members. Because two of you kind of want to serve God your soul and your spirit, but your flesh, which is falling, is the thing that has the issue. So that's where that war goes on and you're so you're so you have to have that friend. That's the passive aggressive friend. They don't want to do nothing, but they won't do it. Anyway, based on whoever stronger. So that's what ends up happening. And that's why I sometimes they don't like that any quality in your body where you don't want to do it. But in your mind you have already reason why you want to do it. Even if you have a reason not to do it, the reason to do it is stronger than the reason not to do it.

Because the purpose that's in your body is misaligned, and only way to feed the right purpose is to go to the author of that purpose and the author of that purpose being God. And he knows how to deal with all that for you, or bless. You said Jesus because Jesus died in flesh to break the curse of Flesh for your spirit. He sent the Holy Spirit and literally him living inside you is, what gives your spirit power, but you need to work. The word is also a manifestation of who Jesus is, but the words off of the manifestation of God's mouth. That's why I sometimes you struggling at night and you open your Bible and all those drugs.

Because it's literally got them out. But then for you, got that main part of you like that, that main characteristic of you there is God the father, but for that you have to be in sonship see there's a purpose behind all of it. But to get to that purpose, you have to go to those places with him and the only way in is, by confession under me. So instead of the kingdom of God is voice activated. So is the kingdom of the Devil by confession, by the power of your confession. That's why you can, you know, you wake up, having sex will be back later that day cuz you just invited that Kingdom in what you do, but you say, okay for me and I will today. But sometimes, every once in awhile, you wake up and say thank you Jesus, and thank you Jesus. And it was activated that confessions against the lead the way, because it's a purposeful confession, because your word is what created purpose, cuz your word and your breasts are the same word and Brett that is in him because he went Even with the Bible, the Bible Jesus, the spirit didn't come and sit down and tell me what's the right Pete? He is tired. You are inspired me and everything else is created. You are the inspired creation. Meaning God already had the intention for you to operate like him in this place. That's why he So when it comes down to purpose, it says the heart is, are in the Deep Waters every day. They discover a new sea creature every single day. So when you start to go in two different places of your heart, you can find different issues. Are you can find different deliverances fits. It just depends on how you want to look at it and I can't do that. Cuz, you know, every year, I think, I'm trying to do some stuff, this problem that I got this problem. Then I got this phone that I got this problem as bad, but that is, God, is working on that because I need to get delivered of that. But when you start to look at it and shift your purpose for looking, because sometimes, you can sit the purpose is based on who's actually looking in you Sometimes it is a familiar Spirit, looking into trying to associate you, with that, old altar to rebuild it and redirected because those purposes are there. The purpose is going on forever, the enemy's purpose and weight loss of a good. So as long as you live, that purpose is still going to be there. But the moment that you allowed a different purpose to take over and sometimes that permits have to start in the mind. I'm about to do some of the other day and I lost my mind. I was like, there's a whole nother mind and we heard this before but it hit me differently because my baby walked into this that hotel during the anniversary and we got in there and I'm with all these bags and I'm hot and Little Debbie walked in the house and took off my wig. And Debbie won't send any said cuz that's my purpose as a mother. That's my purpose to raise hell for that early. So she walked in and I don't care what was on that floor. It was gone with that baby opened up about and she she was so happy and she was so grateful. That's the same way. You have a miserable kid that miserable kids, because there was a purpose to make that child miserable to supersede or deactivate the purpose of God in their life. So how you raised that child? Is that purpose? Because that's one of the scriptures attached, it describes it as handiwork. Your purpose is also someone's work. It's your decision whose work is going to be, they could be your work and it's going to I'm going to fail because your work is always attached to his spiritual work and most of the time that spiritual work is never got to work. But if you decide to be God's handiwork then that purpose begins to floors because it goes back to the original setting. But you are mad.

I know.

Well.

Cuz I wanted to come and talk to me about what you said.

What you got big daddy doing that Keto?

Anything that she said that.

And it's okay if it's on your heart, what did you get from that? What you've heard tonight? Even if it's not something for Batum, that that was one thing that I feel like a horrible, really not going to Mark. Cuz I've been, you know, just trying to figure out who I am and who I am. How God sees me in. Tonight was really encouraging and helping to see different. You know, it gave me different strategies. I'm going in on Prairie and I found them. Who am I? What are some things I said about myself that, you know, Valles on me in the past? A guide to myself because those are very busy though. You can put your own self and bond it back off the road, you speak on behalf of myself in the past. So I got to go in my prayers. They got the buck, but tonight was very eye-opening.

Help me to see how many seen it really wanted to see why it was still kind of weird. I was saying now is like it's like I see you like a, a piece of paper and it's like, On the paper, it had a bunch of words. And it was the stuff I said about me.

And I forgot. So that was very of. I'm okay. But I got some work to do.

Like it.

Emma Newcomb on when she died.

start with

Katrina was talking about.

Taming the tongue. I've been in it.

Very long journey. And I'm still struggling with it. I've gotten to a point where if I don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all, but when I was sitting here tonight.

I feel like God was telling me you know, that's not necessarily a good place to be because if I'm not saying anything at all that you do not edifying myself or others. so,

That's something I need to begin to work on and I had heard someone say one time. for every negative thing you say,

You might have told me very negative thing. You say about yourself. You need to be like five positive thing. I think it was.

So that pop back up in my head cuz I might I haven't been doing that. and then,

Am I available to be used by Christ from the time I wake up.

Waking up for me, and in just like floor was saying. As soon as we wake up with like, what our intentions for the day. What are we saying? Today is going to be a good day or today is going to be a bad day. When I wake up, I'm so like, go go go cuz I set my alarm for 6 a.m. And I press snooze like five times. But trying to wake up at 6:30, sometimes 7 and I have to be out the door by 7:20 to get my girls to school on time. So I'm just a really hard person to wake up and it doesn't matter if I go to bed at 7 a.m. 7 p.m. Or 1 a.m. I still have hard time waking up. So I have to train retrain, my brain to be intentional when I wake up. So, What blew my mind. And what I'm going to take with me tonight was when

She said that eternity field void that we keep trying to feel but we can't go cuz only God, you feel that number of days. I try to feel my soul, enter my body or my flesh like to make me feel like I have purpose and then so, It could be work. It could be my kid. They could be anything but I keep trying to fill it with the wrong thing. And sometimes they're good things that healthy things, you know, you know, work or exercising, you know, some of those things can be healthy, but like I'm still not feeling myself with what's right and Does Your Divine Purpose is as great as your demonic struggles? When I gave me, hope you didn't give me hope.

And confession think speak? Do I got to tell you start to change the whole way of thinking cuz like, even just coming to church Mondays or Wednesdays or Sundays like My thinking is just so go and you're doing good, you know, and but I'm not going nowhere. I'm just coming here, you know, where me and so that kind of bothers me. But I came here tonight. I was like, I got to get back in the routine of stuff. Bernadette said she hasn't seen you in awhile. And I know I've been isolating but in my head, but now I know it's all the wrong stuff. I'm beating myself. 160. Bingo confession.

You said I'm just going to church going anywhere. Let this happen.

Faith comes by what? And hearing.

Okay, so, faith is coming back. That's one. So, you didn't just come to church to there. He said. Not the Assembly of yourself. So you're in the Bible with that. Physical scripture says, you need to hear. There's also string. There was one of the tickling that was coming to me and that one was in his presence.

There is fullness of joy.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That one because they're two or three gather together tonight in his name and I miss you, so you're not the same. And what happens is, when we speak like that. I kiss you. I'm talking about the body of Christ, then we don't really get what we're supposed to get. And I said, he's my position upset over here because I came to receive. And I'm excited about what I received. Now, your floors. I got to go back. I'm not fighting slow. I put in a definition. I wanted to look back at the definition cuz I think that and just a definition of loan was so powerful because it had intentions and it had designs or 4. If you can pull that back up, but I want you to change it be like, you know, what? Because when people go to a gym to workout Gold and pink and I'm not changing anything. You know, what they do? When they leave the body is sore, you know? Right, now when you walk out, you should feel different and if you don't challenges, I want y'all to just becoming charge to come to church. Get what we're doing is not a beneficial or effective say something so we can change it.

What y'all are doing something, right? So I keep coming back and I'm not the type of person that if you know, if it's at work yet cuz I know it's something in me and I'm shut off and I know that is a person like him to be isolating person. So I I I do push through and to try to have that family connection, you know, so like and it's hard for me someday, so don't let you know what are in all day and we are going to go Amber. You're going to go.

Me at 6:45 instead. We're going, we're going, we're going.

One of the things you said was that when you do this and do that, you know what to do. If is good.

Everything will be at.

Go. Right. What time is it?

7, more minutes.

I should begin to confess. I started seeing them for it all off.

And it's like a clean sheet of paper.

She said something to, that's it out. When she said what we have, put the we have bound ourselves with our own words. And I think that's what we've done come off of our faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God says, in Psalms 8 that we were made just a little bit lower than the end of the Angel is the actual word is Elohim. The word Elohim is god with a little G. And then Bishop Johnson is weak. And he said, you have the DNA of a call. If you have a DNA of a god, what does that make you? So your face is coming by your own words. That's why you have a fake struggle because you have a work issue. You don't speak the right things. So you don't believe the right thing. If you can't believe the right things, you cannot do the right thing. God didn't say. Hey, can I make Manny said let us make mad. There was a radio agreement because the word and the thoughts and the action. Where's an agreement? That was one of the things when you were staying.

It was a scripture, we put on here, says that life and death is in the power of the tongue. I didn't know the truth Arrow guy, eat it. It goes back to what we were speaking because at the end of the day whether were speaking life or death, we're creating something we're creating either way. Thank you for that scripture floor. I would like to call him somebody.

Trinity.

You and I T. Y. Come on. Let's go, We don't have a lot of time has one more person.

Say don't.

What do you need? You got something you want to say?

Yeah, she there. No, I'm good.

Get you any time to repent.

People like to do.

A man. Davison.

I know it's like, It's getting like they said they would kind of a question as well.

I'm sorry. Can you hear me? I just figured out how to take it off.

Go ahead.

It was the last day that I have a lot of work to do cuz I am one that Says things about myself. So,

I learned a lot.

Slowest, kind of going a little fast for me. So I was glad that we you are put the scripture back up. But she said a lot that was touching base with me.

That's pretty much it right now. It's looking a lot.

Okay, let's go Yankees.

but, I sent already thinking. I was like, I'm glad I'm part of myself. Like when people do call them universe or say anything. I'm so quick to be like, I'm quick. I'm very very quick to say something. And so then I started going into this site thought process with it, when I was in the streets or something like that. Like, okay. Like going out. I will look, I will look when I go out.

The. The attention I receive from people with like a man Girl doll, you cute. They said not bad. But until then I'm like, why can't I receive a phone call? That's why. When the people die when they told me I was mad cuz if I can receive it cuz I'm glad, you know, you just give to a place of like, what it's like, where is my validation me to come in front of like, what am I? What am I really seeking from people? Then like cuz y'all tell me and I know, no, no, no. No, I need my stuff up right now. I was even up in like I still probably internally like went home and like maybe you felt in a place of like, but it wasn't like this like, you know, like it was never as bad as it is now cuz I I just don't. I do it a lot. I I really do and I try not to

Worthy of God's love is not that I don't feel Worthy.

I think I just don't, I don't understand. I don't I don't be understanding where that, where I come from in that place of, like, not feeling good enough or maybe now, is that I'm a completely changed person, maybe. I know, I just don't know but i v i v e s o. I don't I try to like I tried to tell myself, I need to be more like better, things about myself for like, looking in your face, but it doesn't I don't know. It was given like big head like yeah, and I don't ever want to be back in that place. So they supposed to tell me that. Now, I got to place around 90. I don't know, but that's a false sense of humor. Who don't become on this side? We're still searching for that feeling and it's not. think that so,

I know when I was out there for people with tell me how I look in my I took pride and he was like a sense. I'm tired, and I wore jeans and I thought I was all that and then some, but I don't want to be like that now, but God is saying, I want you to be like that but not in the sense of your, your beauty, or out of you. But what you carry in me, I want you to have that same confidence because you carry Jeep. Come, right. So when I'm looking at you and I'm saying, you'll see your spirit when I saw you up there that day and you were worshiping, and I saw that were supporting you, and I saw that glow of the spirit of Christ on you. That, that wasn't you. That was him. So you what you're doing is your you saying? I don't I don't want to be prideful which is a good thing for guys that I want you to be confident in who I am because that confidence is going to draw people, right? And what they think is this some people that is gorgeous old house on honey. I mean beautiful, but they is as ugly as they come. I want them to see that interview has a projectile words.

Hell, yeah, cuz then I go back into the place when I was a little girl. That's, there's also that like I'm a very confident growing up. I would never was. So when I did go out into the streets and then I received the attention and the affirmation, some people call it. I don't know. I just received a different because growing up, I didn't hang up. I didn't take pride in it, but I had always had. I had a lot of things of its me with it was actually so I don't know. I probably looked at myself different from there. If I feel like, Do you feel?

I feel that way. I mean, I don't feel that way like I don't feel like cuz I feel like I've let him down. I just feel like I'm going to different places that hurt from that homegirl. They got to it up to over here real quick. And Sam and

The definition. Cuz it said intentional, and I was trying to see was that part. Well, what definition was that?

That was supposed to give it to that young lady behind you and it will come back into that because we're speaking to where to meet you're saying right now.

I just want to tell you something, I went through cuz I kind of kind of it through this, if I'm still here saying, right? But Like years ago, will like it was years ago. I got brought up. I got some makeup at a young age and it was like, more than making it was like how to be like, um, I guess how to be a woman in a Rollie way, how to seduce men, how to get attention, he now and all that, but I got some Valium and I grew up in unmerited in it. You know, I was always get attention from men at a young age and then turn to know, I was older she always used to like men has been all over me like a little girl, you know, and so I would just use it to my advantage then I knew I was pretty but It was wearing makeup. But in my mind, I was pretty with makeup, you know, and I are watching America's Next Top Model. When you two came out of watch, how to do it, YouTube, you know, how to do a makeup and hairstyles. Like, when you get out of it, I can have some if you like alter my appearance to look like a video girl, you know, I would relax my hair and put like a Kardashian to know I was used to that but the same time I wasn't trying to I wasn't trying to be with nobody or like be out there. Like that is one of your attention cuz it made me feel like I fit in somewhere because the whole time I'm running from. You know, I know I can't be out there doing everyone was doing because I was like, I was told we do I break out in hives. I did not say

Around me.

But I still wanted that attention. I was wearing the makeup, you know, I have the guys all around me, you know, but and I have the girls wanting to learn to make up and I was doing my hair to look like all the celebrities, you know what I mean? And that was like, I felt like, at the same time, no females like me because, like, they're dudes, like me, you know, and they was already out there doing stuff. I wasn't doing stuff. They wanted me to know. So I didn't have any friends all the guys like me. So I was like in a weird place, you know what I mean? But that attention I got from, you know, the man is some of the females. It made me feel like I was somebody that I didn't fit in somewhere. It's so and that change because I got into like an abusive relationship.

So that was a shot. It was going to going down, you know, and then he was messing around with other females. It went all the way there. I'm like like what's wrong with you? I had your kids. I look better than her. My wife cheating on me with her and he knows though. It went down. I was like, hey, this is not what I thought it was, you know, that the same time I was giving compliments like you're so pretty, you know, and then got things. I got married. I switched over and like, I realized will I don't even put on makeup anymore cuz I have a husband, you know, I don't need to put on makeup to go to Walmart cuz I don't want to like I don't get pleasure from seeing do, crash a car cuz they looking at me, you know, I thought it was like, what did I need all that for in the first place? I went, was it for, like, what was why didn't you so much? And he said, man, you look good. Like why did I drink so much? Cuz now like, I don't hear that. Like I hear a queen, you know, you were a goddess or I'll be like will be like when you open the door for you clean or something like that, like you're not here. I would hear you're so pretty all my time in Jamaica. I thought it was so good. But now I'm like, wow, you are so beautiful and beautiful. Is that not the same as pretty? And everyone was telling me how pretty I was. And I was like, he was my face oily like

Oh, that girl is my face. So oily or not. Cuz I got an oily T-Zone. I like my face oily. She was like, no, it's going. Okay. So when I know it was gone in my mind and it was like that was not you, that was nothing. Still, that wasn't your face. So that's that was me like, you were beautiful and you were they seeing the Holy Spirit In God. So now like I can say like when someone says you're beautiful, I can take that. I know it's not. The makeup is not the makeup. You know what I mean? It has to be. It is not just that I'm naturally pretty cuz he cares about that doesn't matter anymore. Like I wish I would have known but I was like nah, this age that I was already accepted. I was already. Got already approved with me, you know, I was already love. I didn't know, once I validate me and let me know that I'm cool. Or I like, I fit in, like, who are you? Anyway, cuz you don't even know who you are. Who you say, you know what I mean? Like if you don't even know, God, your pants me is trash. Like the one who approves of me. The one who validates me is, the one that matters, you know what I mean? So like, you know, how the ugly dude. So, you pretty don't care, but it's a good thing you were there. Like, you know, you look good. Like, I don't care. I don't care about the girl. I don't care about, no, look, I don't care about no makeup. Like, I would still work if I want to bottle. I don't like, for me, like, it was in the relation. It was kind of borderline, witchcraft, no manipulation, and it was just to feel good. Cuz you know, I didn't feel good anywhere else, you know, it made me feel good. So it looks compliments. Made me feel like I was somebody or I had something going for myself, but now that I know The truth, I don't care about, no compliments. I don't care if someone don't say, I'm pretty. But when they do say, I'll I don't get out of work. If I do here. I don't even take it as a compliment. And I'm letting God shine through, like, they really see something and it's past my face because there's no makeup, and someone might say, I'm pretty thinking about like my natural features, but I don't even care about that. No more. Cuz what's what's that going to do for you? What me being pretty? I mean, or you going to do for someone else's salvation, you know what? I mean? I don't want nobody looking at me being distracted. At anything on my face. Like hear what I'm saying? That, I'm not even speaking this God, you know what I mean? So I don't care about no, I don't care about no confidence, if they do get it, or take it is the glory of God is God, you know what I mean? Like it's not even about any of this town pretty or not, cuz it's not like I'm so past the surface. He don't have right but you already see that you are pretty and for me not to tell you what to do, but you are going to get to a point for you won't wear, you won't wear the lashes. Not saying everyone has to do this but girl that is so that's Freedom that you will not need lashes. And think about how God feels when we go paint our face and alter our appearance when he already made us and he said that everything is good. We made it. See what I mean by yes, defensive. You just go take it off this girl. I went I was doing my individual lashes on to my 2 hours. Putting 1/11 last. I guess running around.

Everything from home. I thought that you wanted me to look like that. He don't even care about that wasn't even looking at me.

I care about my red hair. He didn't care about my piercings. He didn't care about my smokey eye eyelashes, my eyebrows more realistic, my sculpted face even care about, none of that pink.

I'll take it in a bit. You don't even make me feel good. And next thing you know that I'm letting God shine through me. So like you are beautiful but know that even if you don't have your makeup on, you're still beautiful thing that you would like to appoint, like now I'm getting bank cuz I was going to say without your wig, like you can see the, the Contour then to the bone structure of your face, but that's kind of man cannot talk about that. But if you want to know, if you need to know, if you're pretty or not, you are pretty. But that's not even the point. The point is I have been in a place to where I don't like it. I'll be like, I even doing this today. It was a struggle for me in the mirror. Don't want to do this, but I did it because then I was like, I've been in a funk these last couple days. Do wild contacts and pictures from nice about myself cuz I do because it messes up my bill and they discovered that that's my chubby.

You and I haven't had a conversation and the same thing that you said about a doll that has her natural hair.

Naturally, pretty her eyes are gorgeous. I'm like, I can't even see your eyes cuz of this, cuz and everything. I say, your eyes are gorgeous because when you look, they said either the windows to the soul. You have a big heart and I can see that in your eyes. And when you look of your smile or when you mad doll that I'm like, Are you block me? Okay, you can go sit in. What are the Lakers doing? Whenever we start changing pulling things off. Sometimes God is coming after within us. He was coming after what was in C1, because you got to listen to itsy wincy. It like her. I learned how to put makeup on. In the young days. I was using my for manipulation for a lot of stuff going back over what she was saying.

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