A Word on Envy
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ME: Intro - Jealous of the Bengals
ME: Intro - Jealous of the Bengals
As was mentioned earlier, we are having a super bowl party here tonight.
It will be a fun time watching the game or playing games or just eating some good food!
I look forward to seeing you again tonight!
If you did not know, the teams in the Super Bowl are the LA Rams and the Cincinnati Bengals.
Who here is pulling for the Rams?
Who here is pulling for the Bengals?
And who could not care less and is just looking forward to playing some games or eating some food?
If it were up to me, the Chiefs would be playing tonight,
Not the Bengals!
If you did not know, I am a Chiefs fan.
I have been since the early 2000s.
Through high school and college, I use to watch the games by myself most often.
Because I would be deeply invested in every play.
I would shout at things I disagreed with,
I would get red in the face, yell into pillows, and things like that.
Well, while in college, I met this beautiful girl, Stephanie,
And she was actually into me.
Until she watched a Chiefs game with me.
Rather, I should say, until she watched me watch a Chiefs game, in utter terror at what she was seeing.
That is how I came to realize how foolish my passion for the Chiefs was.
Fast forward to two Sundays ago as I watched the Chiefs fall apart in the second half of the AFC Championship and eventually lose to the Bengals.
By God’s grace, I did not shout once, I did not get red faced, I did not injure myself by taking out any frustration or disappointment.
But I did notice that my immediate reaction was to cheer against the Bengals in the Super Bowl!
As I thought through it, I realized it was because I was jealous that the Bengals would be in the Super Bowl instead of the Chiefs.
So, God spent the last 2 weeks dealing with my foolish envy related to tonight’s game,
Bringing me to the point where I now can actually root for the Bengals in the Super Bowl tonight.
I realize this is a relatively light-hearted example of envy,
But the Bible teaches that envy does not help me,
In fact, envy hurts me more than it helps.
We see this in all sorts of other pop-culture examples.
Think of the original Toy Story movie.
Woody gets jealous that he seems to be getting replaced by Buzz Lightyear as Andy’s favorite toy.
And his jealousy is what ends up hurting him, Buzz, the other toys, and even Andy.
In our own lives,
Jealousy leads to depression, self-esteem issues, anger, or bitterness.
Jealousy does not help us, it only hurts.
So, this morning we are piecing together what Proverbs says on this subject,
To have a Word on Envy.
Slide
Our outline shows:
Envy Hurts Me (Proverbs 14:30)
Envy Hurts Others (Proverbs 27:3-4)
Envy Fosters Sin (Proverbs 24:1-2)
Envy Ends You (Proverbs 24:19-20)
Jesus Saves Us (Proverbs 23:17-18)
He is jealous for us, so that we would be satisfied in Him.
Sticking with football for a moment,
I remember in middle school,
I had the opportunity to jump from peewee football to modified.
But if I did, I would not get as much playing time because the older, 2nd year modified players would start.
I was jealous of the playing time they would get.
At the time, I thought of myself as this peewee football all star,
I believed I was better than those older kids who would start over me on modified!
So, I decided to stay an extra year in peewee just to get myself more playing time,
And prove that I was a better player.
What I did not realize was that it set me back a year in modified.
So, when I eventually made the jump to modified, everyone else on the team already played a year together,
And already spent a year learning the plays.
One of the ways modified football gave more opportunities to play was with a half time scrimmage against the other team’s backups.
The coach wanted me to play during one of those halftime scrimmages with the first year kids who were all a year younger than me,
Still jealous of the kids my age who got to play in the actual game,
I refused and I quit.
I thought my peewee success would prove that I was better and that I deserved to play on modified.
But Proverbs is right,
My jealousy never helped me,
In fact, I continued to be jealous of the kids my age on the football team,
So, I stopped wanting to be around them,
And I became very lonely and sad throughout middle school.
It really took two years and me getting saved to finally let go of that and rejoin the football team.
Slide
Envy Hurts Me (Prov. 14:30)
So, I experienced first hand what Proverbs 14:30 teaches,
That Envy Hurts Me.
A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot.
Now, I am certain that I am not the only one who has had envy hurt me.
And it does not only hurt in one way.
Envy hurts emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically.
There are harmful consequences to envy.
But Proverbs 14:30 begins with the antithesis to envy, peace and tranquility.
Specifically, tranquility in the heart.
This speaks to the link between mental or spiritual peace and physical health.
Slide
Proverbs 3:7-8 explains further:
Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.
If we think about it, this is a recognizable truth, isn’t it?
Stress, anxiety, anger, and other internal stressors cause physical ailments.
High blood pressure, nausea, heart attack, and more.
But when my heart is at peace,
When I am content,
It gives life to my physical body,
It leads to mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
Slide
Prov. 14:30 is alluding to the curse brought into this world by our sin.
The Bible teaches that our bodies go through physical decay because we have broken God’s law,
The very first people, Adam and Eve, first disobeyed God,
But every person since has disobeyed God’s Word, except Jesus.
So, this means you have disobeyed God, I have disobeyed God,
We all have disobeyed God.
Envy is one way we have broken God’s law.
Proverbs is saying when envy is present in my heart,
I do not have peace, instead, my bones rot like cancer.
Fostering resentment is bad both for my soul and my body.
Jealousy just eats away at us.
Think about it, when we are jealous,
It can lead to uncontrollable anger, hives, eating disorders, or emotional ruin.
Envy hurts me.
So, envy is foolishness,
Best case scenario, envy will be pointless,
Slide
As Ecclesiastes 4:4 states:
Then I saw that all toil and all skill in work come from a man’s envy of his neighbor. This also is vanity and a striving after wind.
But most often, envy is destructive.
Slide
James 3:16 explains:
For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.
The Bible clearly says that wanting something someone else has is destructive.
Slide
Yet, so many of us want things other people have, right?
We envy clothes, or cars, or homes, or money, or popularity, and on and on.
And the Bible says that envy is destructive.
But envy is not only wanting what someone else has,
It is also wanting to keep something to myself and not let it become someone else’s.
And this is also destructive.
If we are honest, we have all experienced these envious desires.
But we just don’t want to admit it because doing so lets people gain power over us.
Maybe we felt resentment toward a classmates success.
Or we were spiteful when a coworker achieved more than us.
I will be honest, I struggle with this as a pastor.
Looking at other pastors and thinking things like,
Why are more people going to his church?
Why does it seem like they just keep growing?
It must be nice to have all those resources for ministry...
So, we can get jealous for a variety of reasons, even for good things.
But when that happens,
The Bible teaches that envy hurts me.
Perhaps we get suspicious that someone at work is going to take our job.
Or we get worried that a new friend in the friend group is going to mess everything up.
Or that our single friend is getting married and won’t have as much time.
Or our couple friends are pregnant and won’t have as much time.
Or our work friend is retiring and plans to travel more and won’t have as much time.
Jealousy happens in a variety of life situations.
In romantic relationships,
A guy you like likes another girl so you are mean to her.
Or a girl you like likes another guy so you become competitive toward him to try and impress her.
It happens in work life.
It eats you up when you see coworkers succeed,
Or it makes your day when you see them fail.
Jealousy happens when it comes to physical appearance.
You look at the ripped guy with the six-pack abs and you wish you could look like that.
You look at the girl who is a social media model and wish you had her looks and influence.
This jealousy happens in church life, too.
If our church grows too much, it may change the way I like things.
So, I feel resentment toward the newer people,
And make sure they understand the way things work around here.
Jealousy happens in a variety of life situations.
And when we feel envy,
We react by doing things to compensate for that strong, impulsive, seemingly uncontrollable feeling.
Things that eventually hurt me.
At one time or another,
We all find ourselves wishing we are as strong, or smart, or popular, or successful, or wealthy, or athletic as someone else.
And in our modern world, social media has become gasoline being dumped all over the already present fire of envy burning inside us.
Like we saw in the commercial with Captain Obvious,
When people post about their lives, their families, their vacations,
Comparison and jealousy burns to uncontrollable new levels.
But the Bible says we must take a hose to this fire,
We must douse this jealousy.
When it comes to being jealous of others,
It is wrong.
It is sin.
And it is self-destructive.
This battle feels so much harder in today’s culture,
Where my jealousy burns uncontrollably as I compare myself to what I see on everyone else’s social media page.
Envy is not only discouraging,
It also fosters discontentment.
Because I no longer become thankful for the life God has given me.
Then it destroys.
Envy Hurts Me.
WE: Envy Hurts Others (Prov. 27:3-4)
WE: Envy Hurts Others (Prov. 27:3-4)
But not only does envy hurt me.
Envy hurts the people around me.
Slide
As Proverbs 27:3-4 explains,
Envy Hurts Others.
A stone is heavy, and sand is weighty, but a fool’s provocation is heavier than both. Wrath is cruel, anger is overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?
The theme of these verses describes unbearable behavior that we cannot endure.
Being aggravated by a fool is compared to the weight of a heavy stone or a bag of sand.
It is saying that the burden of being aggravated by a fool is even heavier than these things.
Slide
Proverbs 17:12 paints a similar but more vivid picture:
Let a man meet a she-bear robbed of her cubs rather than a fool in his folly.
Proverbs is saying we are better off standing between a mama bear and her cubs than we are standing between a fool and his foolishness.
These are blunt comparisons.
Proverbs is saying violence is bad,
Having a short temper is bad.
They are overwhelmingly evil.
But jealousy is even worse!
Jealousy is even more destructive!
Why?
Slide
Proverbs 6:34 says it is because:
For jealousy makes a man furious, and he will not spare when he takes revenge.
We read passages like this and it seems clear and obvious,
Jealousy is bad.
I may seem to contradict myself at this point,
But a full biblical understanding of jealousy reveals that jealousy is a bit complicated.
Slide
According to the Bible, jealousy can be a legitimate emotion.
Just like there can be righteous anger,
Jealousy is not always a bad thing.
The idea of being zealous or passionate about a proper cause to the point of jealousy,
The Bible says, is not wrong.
But what qualifies as a proper cause?
It is when an exclusive relationship is being threatened.
The perfect example is God Himself.
God describes Himself as jealous for His people and our exclusive devotion to Him.
Slide
Zechariah 8:2 refers to God’s people as Zion, when He says:
“Thus says the Lord of hosts: I am jealous for Zion with great jealousy, and I am jealous for her with great wrath.
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In the NT, James 4:5 says:
Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”?
God is jealous for His people and His glory.
Slide
So, we can have a jealousy like God’s jealousy.
Numbers 25:11 mentions one person who is an example of this,
Phinehas turned away God’s anger because he was “jealous with God’s jealousy.”
Brothers and sisters, this means we should have a positive jealousy,
A passion, for exclusive devotion to God.
But can we then also have a positive jealousy for other people?
Yes, there is one human relationship unlike any other.
What human relationship represents God’s relationship with us?
Slide
A husband and wife relationship.
If I can be blunt.
It is foolish to always write off a spouse’s jealousy as wrong.
Oftentimes if your spouse is questioning you about a relationship you have with someone of the opposite sex,
It is coming from a place of love for you and concern for your marriage, your exclusive relationship.
Too often, we just write this off as sinful jealousy based on a lack of trust.
And we respond with anger and defensiveness.
But the reality is, should you really trust yourself?
You are accusing your spouse of not trusting you,
Why do you trust yourself?
Why do you not trust your spouse to see the danger of your own foolishness?
The danger that you are blind to.
Brothers and sisters, your spouse’s concern for your marriage,
And his or her courage to ask you about these things are a gift from God.
Slide
This is the idea that Song of Solomon 8:6 teaches:
Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord.
Slide
Jealousy for protecting an exclusive relationship is a healthy and godly jealousy.
This jealousy is being intolerant of any disruption or intrusion against the relationship.
It is a mark of love for that person,
As oppose to indifference toward them.
But the comparisons in Proverbs 27 emphasize just how destructive foolish jealousy can be!
This is not a healthy jealousy for someone we are in an exclusive relationship with,
It is unhealthy jealousy of someone else.
When we are jealous of others, it is sin,
And no one wants to be around us.
No one wants to put up with all the drama caused by our jealousy.
Our jealousy of others destroys friendships.
Slide
Duane Garrett says this unhealthy jealousy is so destructive because...
“Fury that stems from jealousy is not open to reason or moderation.”
GOD: Envy Fosters Sin (Prov. 24:1-2)
GOD: Envy Fosters Sin (Prov. 24:1-2)
This type of jealousy is complete foolishness,
Because being jealous of others,
Means we are jealous of other sinners.
And this begs the question, are sinners really worthy of being envied?
Slide
Proverbs 24:1-2 says no, because Envy Fosters Sin.
Be not envious of evil men, nor desire to be with them, for their hearts devise violence, and their lips talk of trouble.
One of the key individuals of the OT is David.
When he was young, he had repeated military success,
And many began to follow him as a leader.
The king at that time was a man named Saul.
And Saul is a perfect example of a man who’s envy fostered sin.
His jealousy overwhelmed him to try and kill David multiple times.
Slide
So, jealousy fosters sin because the root of jealousy is the belief that God has not given you enough.
Jealousy comes from a heart that lacks contentment.
It is an expression of an internal belief that God is withholding something better from you.
Based on what you see God giving to someone else.
And when a person has dissatisfaction in their heart they lash out.
When a person is confronted with their own sense of inadequacy,
They react with violence, gossip, theft, or more.
This is what we see from the example of Saul.
David is described as a man after God’s own heart,
But Saul was not jealous of David’s character,
No, he was jealous of David’s blessings.
His military success and his growing following.
Saul wanted those blessings for himself.
So, it did not matter if David was prosperous because he was righteous,
Or if he was prosperous by being wicked.
Saul wanted the prosperity, not the character.
And that is how envy fosters sin.
Especially when wicked people seem to prosper,
Envy will foster the desire to imitate their sinful behavior,
In hopes of replicating their prosperity.
Slide
That is the type of behavior Proverbs 24 is condemning.
It is saying if a person is jealous of sinful people who succeed in this world by their sin,
Then that person makes sinners into role models,
Hoping to replicate their success.
But what type of behavior does Proverbs say sinners display?
Violent and troublesome behavior.
Slide
So, Proverbs is warning that being involved in violence and trouble with evil people will lead to your downfall.
It is pleading with you to recognize that their behavior is despicable,
So, you must not lower yourself to their level.
Friends, the reality is, you envy the wicked when you set your mind on this world.
The antidote to this envy is to set your mind on what is above,
The glory to come in heaven,
As well as the darkness that comes with judgment.
The anger, badmouthing, and bitter attitudes of sinners lead to God’s judgment.
So, Proverbs is asking, why be jealous of that?
Why be jealous of the sinner who is obsessed with all that is negative?
Why be envious of the one who devises violence and talks of trouble?
Instead, set your mind on what is above,
And when you do,
Sinful, violent, and troublesome behavior becomes repulsive.
And that becomes your motivation to avoid jealousy.
YOU: Envy Ends You (Prov. 24:19-20)
YOU: Envy Ends You (Prov. 24:19-20)
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You must never envy sinners,
Because Proverbs 24:19-20 warns that Envy Ends You.
Fret not yourself because of evildoers, and be not envious of the wicked, for the evil man has no future; the lamp of the wicked will be put out.
There are several passages that warn against envying sinners who prosper.
The reason for these warnings is because sinners who prosper will be judged by God.
So, wisdom says, “Do not join them!”
The application of this warning is clear.
Do not envy prosperous sinners,
Or else you will copy the practices of sinners.
It is so easy to be jealous of those who succeed in this world,
Tempting you to overlook their sinful behavior that makes them successful.
If this were not the case,
Then so many people would not find their behavior appealing.
When someone who is ungodly seems to get whatever they want,
While being godly seems to leave you with very little,
Then being godly does not seem like a benefit.
But Proverbs says to avoid this because God will condemn the wicked.
In other words, the tables will turn on the prosperous sinner.
Everything they managed to acquire through their sinful ways will be lost.
And in the end, the righteous will be rewarded.
God’s approval, and His eternal rewards,
Are worth so much more than all the nice things sinners manage to acquire in this world.
So, God is telling you to trust Him,
To trust His Word more than you trust your experience in this world.
Because even though the success of the ungodly may be apparent now,
It is a short-lived success in exchange for a never ending punishment.
So, our passage here helps you to have an eternal perspective.
It is yet another passage commanding you not to be jealous of sinners.
It says specifically, you must not allow evildoers to agitate you.
The word translated to “fret not” literally means “become hot.”
So, it is saying not to let evildoers make your blood boil.
Slide
Psalm 37:7-8 similarly says:
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices! Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.
This is talking about getting angry, or agitated, or jealous because evildoers are prospering.
Slide
Vs. 20 explains why you must not get agitated by an evil person.
Because their prosperity will end at judgment.
There is no future for the sinner.
Where there is no future, there is no hope.
Slide
So, when you are evil, or envious of those who are evil, you have no future and no hope.
It would be foolish to imitate the ways of a prosperous sinner for a limited time of prosperity,
When it pales in comparison to the opportunity for eternal prosperity.
Proverbs is clear that envy ends you.
As we saw earlier, it rots your bones, it destroys your relationships, and it sends you to hell.
Envy is a matter of life and death.
It eats away at you,
It erodes your life,
And it leads you into darkness.
As vs. 20 concludes by saying that the lamp of the wicked will be put out.
In the OT, lamp often refers to offspring.
Specifically connected to David’s dynasty.
David’s life is referred to as the lamp of Israel.
And God shows concern throughout the OT that David always has a lamp (an offspring.)
Slide
As 1 Kings 15:4 explains:
Nevertheless, for David’s sake the Lord his God gave him a lamp in Jerusalem, setting up his son after him, and establishing Jerusalem,
This same lamp imagery is used in Psalm 132 to refer to the Messiah.
So, Proverbs is teaching that the hope of preserving David’s lamp, David’s offspring, until the Messiah comes,
Is by not envying the wicked.
This means the promise of an eternal kingdom ultimately brings a future hope and eternal life together.
And when Jesus, the Messiah, rose from the dead,
He brought this hope to reality.
Therefore friends, you can now enter into the eternal kingdom if you trust in the King,
If you repent,
Meaning you turn away from your jealousy, and turn toward Him in trust.
Jealousy is a matter of life and death.
Slide
It is included in a list of sins that keep you from the kingdom of God in Gal. 5:19-21
Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
So, it is clear that envy ends you.
Slide
But, just a few verses earlier, Proverbs 24:14 says:
Know that wisdom is such to your soul; if you find it, there will be a future, and your hope will not be cut off.
So, your future, your hope, is found in wisdom.
In other words, the righteous have hope.
What a relief, right?
All we need to have hope is to be righteous.
Slide
The only problem with that, is Romans 3:10 says:
as it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one;
So, then none of us are righteous,
Therefore, in our own strength, we are hopeless.
WE: Jesus Saves Us (Prov. 23:17-18)
WE: Jesus Saves Us (Prov. 23:17-18)
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However, Proverbs 23:17-18 foreshadows that Jesus Saves Us.
Let not your heart envy sinners, but continue in the fear of the Lord all the day. Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off.
This passage exposes the simultaneous admiration and resentment that makes up envy.
It springs from this unhealthy preoccupation with ourselves in this present world.
So, the instruction of vs. 17 reveals the strategy for dealing with our jealousy,
And that is the covenantal relationship between God and us,
Based upon fear of the Lord.
Slide
This means the way we fight sinful envy is by trusting in the Lord.
Having whole-hearted confidence in Him!
We struggle with this because we live in a world where it is tempting to be jealous of the prosperity of wicked people.
So much so, that we find ourselves imitating their ways.
Proverbs responds by teaching that the solution to jealousy of others is contentment in God.
But what is the motivation for this contentment?
Vs. 18 teaches the motivation is the future reward of eternal life.
It is having an eternal perspective.
It is setting our minds on things that are above, as Col. 3 says.
It goes beyond just the practical or immediate concerns of wisdom in this world.
God reveals Himself to sustain us in our suffering,
To sustain us through the temptation to be jealous of this world.
The remedy to our envy is to look up to the Lord,
The motivation to look up to the Lord is to look ahead to His promised future.
If we treasure the Lord rather than other sinners and their prosperity in this world,
Then we have hope for eternity.
Slide
This is what Jesus taught in Matt. 6:19-21:
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Trust in the Gospel brings eternal, and abundant, life.
This is the life God wants us to live!
And this is what Proverbs is all about!
Slide
The Gospel itself is a story about jealousy.
Jealous leaders killed Jesus.
He was driving them insane with His teaching!
Matt. 27:18 says the Jewish leaders handed Jesus over to the Romans because of envy.
But it was not just their envy that killed Jesus.
Our envy killed Jesus too.
He died on the cross to pay the penalty for our envy.
Every time we resented someone for getting the promotion we deserved,
Every time we were envious that someone was more popular,
Every time we were mad at someone because we wished we had the life they post about on social media,
We added the consequences of our sin onto Christ.
But the good news of the Gospel,
Is that God is jealous for an exclusive relationship with us.
So, He sent His Son to die for our sins.
Despite us being jealous of others,
He was still passionate to pay for our sins so we would be satisfied in Him.
He loves us.
He wants us to be His.
So, when we feel jealous of others,
Remember, Jesus died so we would be satisfied in Him.
We do not need whatever it is we are jealous of,
Because we have Jesus,
And that is all we need.
Only Christ can forgive us for our jealousy.
And only Christ can empower us with His Spirit to free us from our envy.
Proverbs repeatedly teaches that foolishness is a belief issue.
It is not an effort issue.
We do not need to try harder to stop being jealous.
If we are jealous of others,
It shows a lack of belief, a lack of trust, in Jesus.
We are jealous when we are dissatisfied in Jesus.
But trust in Christ frees us from envy.
Our future, our hope in Christ is far greater than whatever temporary object we are jealous of in this world.
He is jealous for us,
So, that we would be satisfied in Him.
Pray