Sermon Tone Analysis

1 Corinthians 7:10-11

Divorce and Remarriage—Handle with Care

First Corinthians chapter seven is an extremely controversial chapter among Christians in North America today because of its comments on divorce and remarriage.

Even in our own congregation there is no consensus on this subject.

I would have preferred to quickly pass over this chapter and moved on to safer subjects but I believe the Lord wants us to not pass over this too quickly but to look closely at these verses with hearts that are open to what God desires to show us.

Before moving ahead let’s quickly review the context of today’s study.

Paul has been confronting immorality which seemed to be very widespread in the church at Corinth.

At the end of chapter 6 Paul confronted the sin of sexual immorality in general and specifically the sin of joining together with a prostitute.

Then he confronted those who were apparently saying that all sexual relations were wrong and that if a person were truly spiritual they would not touch a woman at all, not even their spouse.

Then he addressed the unmarried and the widows (which likely should be interpreted as widowers and widows) recommending that it would be good for them to remain unmarried, but if they didn’t keep their passions under control that they should get married as there is no acceptable outlet for sexual expression outside of marriage.

Now in verses 10-11 Paul is addressing Christians who are married to Christians.

In verses 12-16 he will address Christians who are married to unbelievers.

Then in verses 25-28 he will address virgins who have never married including those who are betrothed or engaged to be married.

* *

*Vs.

10-11* /“//Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband.

But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband.

And a husband is not to divorce his wife.”/

He begins by speaking to Christians who are married to Christians as he addresses mixed marriages later on.

This is not a recommendation but a command; it is not up for debate.

When he says, “not I but the Lord”, he means that this command does not originate with him but with the Lord Jesus.

Paul is referring to Jesus’ teaching on divorce.

To see for ourselves what Jesus taught on divorce look to Mark chapter 10 because what Paul says here to the Corinthians is very similar to what Jesus was recorded to teach in Mark chapter ten, though Mark’s gospel had not been written yet.

* *

*/Mark 10:1-12 /*/“//Then He arose from there and came to the region of Judea by the other side of the Jordan.

And multitudes gathered to Him again, and as He was accustomed, He taught them again.//

//The Pharisees came and asked Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” testing Him.// //And He answered and said to them, “What did Moses command you?”// //They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to dismiss her.”// //And Jesus answered and said to them, “Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept.//

//But from the beginning of the creation, God ‘made them male and female.’//

//‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife,// //and the two shall become one flesh’//; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh.//

//Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”//

//In the house His disciples also asked Him again about the same matter.//

//So He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her.// //And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”/

*/ /*

Now in 1 Corinthians 7:10 Paul is reinforcing what Jesus taught concerning divorce and remarriage.

Mark 10 does not record all that Jesus had to say on this subject but it most closely parallels what Paul is teaching.

We will not study all that the Scriptures have to say about divorce and remarriage but will focus our study primarily on what Paul under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit taught his church at Corinth about this subject.

Now, to someone who is struggling in a difficult marriage, this teaching from Mark’s Gospel and from Paul’s epistle may seem impossible to follow, it may even seem uncompassionate and cruel.

Repeatedly we saw both in our study through the Gospel of Mark and now again in Corinthians the same message, the Christian life is not about what I want, or about what is the most comfortable path; it is about denying myself, taking up my cross and following Him.

The true Christian life is impossible for anyone to live out of their own resources.

The true Christian life can only be lived by the power of the indwelling Christ.

It is only possible by the grace of God.

In verse 10 Paul says that “/A wife is not to depart from her husband/.”

Why was Paul specifically addressing the wife and the husband only later on almost as an afterthought?

Divorce was very common in the Roman culture as well as in the Jewish culture of the New Testament time.

In the Jewish culture women were usually not permitted to divorce, it was only the men who had the prerogative to divorce but in the Roman culture women could divorce their husbands though it was not very common for the woman to initiate.

/(Fee, p. 294) /

/ /

Therefore it is very unusual that he should direct his comments about divorce primarily to the women.

This has led to the suspicion that it may have been largely the women in the church at Corinth who were embracing the idea addressed in the first five verses of the chapter that those who truly wanted to be spiritual should abstain from any sexual involvement with their spouses.

The husbands were likely less keen on the idea and so perhaps it was primarily the women were leaving their husbands ironically it seems for spiritual reasons so that they could practice celibacy.

The legal term “divorce” is not here used of the women but rather the term, “depart”, suggesting that perhaps they were not technically divorcing their husbands but were abandoning the marriage.

And this whole attitude was resulting in some of the husbands resorting to the prostitutes.

So in addressing this crisis in the church Paul directs his comments to the women in verse ten who in this particular instance seem to be the ones leaving their husbands.

However regardless of the circumstances that prompted Paul to address this subject of divorce and remarriage, his instructions are directed to both wives and husbands and his words, like Jesus’ words in Mark, are general statements about divorce:

 

“/A wife is not to depart from her husband . . .

and a husband is not to divorce his wife/.”

But notice verse 11, “/But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband./”

Paul commands that they were not to divorce.

And yet he makes allowance for divorce if it does happen.

This is important for us to come to terms with.

Why did Paul make this allowance?

Notice also that he is not addressing the unwilling victim of divorce but it is addressing the initiator of a divorce after she was commanded not to do it.

God’s instruction is very clear, we are not to divorce, but if the woman goes ahead and divorces her husband provision is made for her.

She is not to be put out of the church and treated like the immoral people of chapter five.

She is simply to remain single or else be reconciled to her husband.

Remarriage is not an option.

(In 1 Cor.

5:4 Paul’s comments are very strong and unyielding regarding those who willfully persist in sexual immorality, “. . .

/deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus/.”

And verse 9, “/I wrote to you in my epistle not to keep company with sexually immoral people/.”)

This concession of Paul in allowing divorce to take place, though divorce is clearly condemned as contrary to God’s word and God’s will, can be described with the same words Jesus used describing the concession Moses made to allow divorce, “/Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept/.”

(Mark 10:5)

 

To divorce is clearly not being led by the Spirit but it is to stubbornly, hard heartedly go against the purpose of God.

But God will and does allow it to happen.

So Paul, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit acknowledges that sometimes people do divorce, but it is contrary to God’s command.

The Bible never gives God’s blessing to divorce.

In every situation in which the subject is discussed in the Bible divorce is always portrayed in a negative light and never with approval.

However the sin of divorce does not seem to be prescribed the same kind of disciplinary judgment that is prescribed for sexual immorality.

What if the woman addressed in 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 again disobeys this second command to remain single or else be reconciled to her husband, and instead she gets remarried to another man?

This passage does not go there, but Jesus does in */Mark 10:11-12 /*/“//So [Jesus] said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her.// //And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”

/Therefore, this is likely why Paul says that if she doesn’t like remaining single her only other option is to be reconciled to her husband.

One of the reasons I used to struggle with this teaching, thinking it was too severe, is because I had been conditioned by our society to view celibate singleness as remaining incomplete and falling short of God’s ideal purpose for mankind.

But as we have seen, the teaching of Paul in this chapter on the virtues of remaining single blows that myth away.

Requiring Christians to remain single if divorced is not a punishment at all.

In his book, “This Momentary Marriage”, John Piper has this to say about singleness: “My main point is that God promises those who remain single in Christ blessings that are better than the blessings of marriage and children, and he calls you to display, by the Christ-exalting devotion of your singleness, the truths about Christ and his kingdom that shine more clearly through singleness than through marriage and child-rearing . . .

To say the main point more briefly: God promises spectacular blessings to those of you who remain single in Christ, and he gives you an extraordinary calling for your life.

To be single in Christ is, therefore not a falling short of God’s best, but a path of Christ-exalting covenant-keeping obedience that many are called to walk.”

Then he backs this up with scripture quoting from Isaiah 56:4-5 “/Thus says the LORD: “To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose the things that please me and hold fast my covenant, I will give in my house and within my walls a monument and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off./”

/(John Piper, “This Momentary Marriage”, Crossway Books, Wheaton, 2009, p. 106-107)/

 

In a culture in which both divorce and remarriage have become so common this teaching has become very contentious and divisive in the church.

Some find the teaching of Paul and of Jesus too harsh and try to find ways around the clear wording of the Bible.

But there are others who turn these verses into law and make divorce and remarriage the worst of all sins in the church.

I believe that neither of these responses is appropriate.

Divorce and remarriage did happen and such a person was not ostracized from the fellowship of the church.

/(Fee, p. 296) /So how do we accommodate divorce (and remarriage too?) without watering down the commands of Jesus and Paul?

This is a question that we need to wrestle with and look to God for wise direction.

There are other passages in the Bible which we have not studied this morning that are interpreted by some as giving an exception that allows both divorce and remarriage for the victim of an unfaithful, adulterous spouse.

Regardless of how we may interpret these passages we must come to terms with the fact that the majority of Christians in the western world are convinced from scripture that there is justifiable grounds for divorce and remarriage.

And many of our Christian brothers and sisters are getting divorced and remarried with the blessing of their local church.

How are we who find ourselves on opposite sides of this controversy supposed to relate to each other?

There are few issues that are more controversial in the church than the question of whether or not the Scriptures allow divorce and remarriage under certain circumstances.

I am of the personal conviction that divorce and remarriage are never approved or prescribed by the word of God under any circumstance, though I recognize that there does seem to be allowance made in scripture for divorce and remarriage to take place.

But such allowance seems to always be a merciful concession for the stubbornness and unbelief of our flesh rather than God’s desire for our lives.

However I am keenly aware that in this controversy I am clearly in the minority with this view.