The Purpose of Singleness
He Created Them • Sermon • Submitted
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Transcript
Handout
Introduction
Introduction
Recap
Gender
Men
Women
Marriage
(may think we are going backwards with singleness)
Three types of singles in the room:
Single and seeking.
Single by choice.
Single again.
Two durations of singleness:
Single for a season.
Single for life.
One purpose for all singles:
Glorify God with your singleness and enjoy a relationship with Him.
This was the direction I was going to go when I realized it is actually the purpose of each of our lives regardless of relationship status — To glorify God and enjoy Him forever — so I decided to make it an entire sermon to help bring our series to a close.
God promises that singleness can be more productive and more fulfilling than marriage as you pursue Christ more than a spouse.
Isaiah 56:3–7 (ESV) — 3 Let not the foreigner who has joined himself to the Lord say, “The Lord will surely separate me from his people”; and let not the eunuch say, “Behold, I am a dry tree.” 4 For thus says the Lord: “To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose the things that please me and hold fast my covenant, 5 I will give in my house and within my walls a monument and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off. 6 “And the foreigners who join themselves to the Lord, to minister to him, to love the name of the Lord, and to be his servants, everyone who keeps the Sabbath and does not profane it, and holds fast my covenant— 7 these I will bring to my holy mountain, and make them joyful in my house of prayer; their burnt offerings and their sacrifices will be accepted on my altar; for my house shall be called a house of prayer for all peoples.”
Singles are not second-rate Christians.
Singles are not second-rate Christians.
3 Let not the foreigner who has joined himself to the Lord say, “The Lord will surely separate me from his people”; and let not the eunuch say, “Behold, I am a dry tree.”
Foreigner and Eunuch — two groups who were considered outcasts.
Foreigner didn’t have the same privileges as the one who was born a Jew.
The eunuch believed he could not have the same purpose as other Jews.
In fact, according to Deut 23:1 the eunuch did NOT belong in the assembly of the Lord
“dry tree” = no children. No way to accomplish the task “to be fruitful and multiply.”
Perhaps the eunuch chose to be a eunuch but more than likely it was not his choice.
(for some here singleness was NOT your choice)
Sometimes singleness has a stigma and sometimes it has a sting.
We say things like,
This is a time to work on yourself (as if there is something wrong with you)
“Singleness is not a disease for which the only known cure is marriage.”
— Bill Flanagan, Leadership, Vol. 4, no. 4.
ILLUST - Story is told of a young single man who would find himself at every wedding sitting next to a dear elderly woman from church. Every wedding, She would lean close to him and say, “You’re next.” Eventually, they found themselves sitting next to each other at the funeral of an elderly friend from church and this young man took this time to lean in close to his friend and whisper, “You’re next.”
All this implies that singleness is second-rate, a sort of purgatory of relationships until you are sanctified enough to be married.
We already talked about how God said, “It is not good for man to be alone.” and you have felt alone for a long time.
This does not mean that marriage is the only way to find fulfillment and purpose — that you can’t be perfect and NOT be married.
If that is the case then we have a problem with Jesus. He is in fact, perfect, but was never married.
Paul was single and certainly not a second-rate Christian.
The verse does not say, “It is not good for man to be single.”
The reason for that statement was not to give the ideal relationship definition, but to explain the purpose of the woman.
Although I have been married for almost 21 years, I remember what it was like to be single.
I remember going to my friends’ weddings — alone.
"Aren't you married yet?"
"What's a nice girl like you doing unmarried?"
"What you need is a good wife."
"Found anybody to date yet?"
(I remember mom trying to set me up with my COUSIN)
"I'm praying the Lord will lead you to a good guy."
"It's too bad he's not married."
I remember trying to figure out where a single Christian guy could find a Christian girl.
ILLUST - where do Christian singles mingle? Can’t go the bar. Online dating and Christian dating websites were not a thing when I was single (probably because of dialup). Where to go? — “Singles ministry” at church — either filled with college students or people looking for “fresh meat.”
Listen, You are in NO WAY less of a Christian or less of a person simply because you are not married.
Remember, we will all be single one day.
Jesus was single
Paul was single
Paul calls singleness a “gift.”
1 Corinthians 7:7 (ESV)
7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.
The gift of singleness can be more productive and fulfilling than marriage.
The gift of singleness can be more productive and fulfilling than marriage.
5 I will give in my house and within my walls a monument and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off.
Productive
Productive
God promises to give eunuchs something that is better than what they feel they are lacking by being unmarried - something better than married people have.
(credit to John Piper and Barry Danylak, Redeeming Singleness)
In the Old Covenant, the covenant people of God who are to act as a light, represent him, display his glory to the world, were primarily increased through procreation.
Genesis 1:28 (ESV)
28 And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
Abraham & Isaac
Genesis 15:5 (ESV)
5 And he brought him outside and said, “Look toward heaven, and number the stars, if you are able to number them.” Then he said to him, “So shall your offspring be.”
David and Saul
1 Samuel 24:21 (ESV)
21 Swear to me therefore by the Lord that you will not cut off my offspring after me, and that you will not destroy my name out of my father’s house.”
Levirate Marriage and Ruth
Deuteronomy 25:6 (ESV)
6 And the first son whom she bears shall succeed to the name of his dead brother, that his name may not be blotted out of Israel.
Covenant-keeping eunuchs cannot keep the physical line going, yet they are promised an everlasting name and MORE sons and daughters. How is this possible?
Isaiah 53:10 (ESV)
10 Yet it was the will of the Lord to crush him; he has put him to grief; when his soul makes an offering for guilt, he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days; the will of the Lord shall prosper in his hand.
This is a prophecy of the Messiah, Jesus. Jesus was single and died. How is it that AFTER “his soul makes an offering for guilt” (his death on the cross) will he see his “offspring?”
Because Jesus’ death ushered in the New Covenant by which God would not primarily use the physical nation of Israel to grow the covenant people. It would now be through spiritual children who trust in Christ. People of any nation, tribe, and tongue.
Isaiah 54:1 (ESV)
1 “Sing, O barren one, who did not bear; break forth into singing and cry aloud, you who have not been in labor! For the children of the desolate one will be more than the children of her who is married,” says the Lord.
This is how we are “Abraham’s offspring”
3 Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.”
7 Know then that it is those of faith who are the sons of Abraham.
26 for in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.
48 But he replied to the man who told him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” 49 And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers!
This means for you who are single, your family is right here. You may not have any physical children, but you can have a busload of spiritual children through disciplemaking.
Fulfilling
Fulfilling
7 these I will bring to my holy mountain, and make them joyful in my house of prayer; their burnt offerings and their sacrifices will be accepted on my altar; for my house shall be called a house of prayer for all peoples.”
When single, finding joy does not mean becoming NOT single but in using your singleness for God’s glory.
Just as in marriage it is fulfilling to have children — to have the joy of the product of our marriage, so also using your gifts in your singleness can bring joy.
32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.
Both marriage and singleness are a gift from God.
The presence of God is all that is needed for JOY (not the presence of a spouse)
Pursue Christ more than you pursue a spouse.
Pursue Christ more than you pursue a spouse.
4 For thus says the Lord: “To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose the things that please me and hold fast my covenant,
The eunuch described, the one who will be productive and fulfilled is the one who is not simply religious but in a relationship with God.
Christ must ALWAYS be our first and foremost relationship.
If Christ is not your first relationship prior to marriage, he will not be once you are married.
There can be a danger in marriage when your spouse becomes your functional savior.
I know some of you have a desire to be married. That’s a good desire.
We can never allow a good desire to become our greatest desire. When we allow God to be our greatest desire, we get it.
Psalm 37:4 (ESV)
4 Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Don’t sit. Don’t settle. Serve.
Don’t sit. Don’t settle. Serve.
Don’t waste one gift in an effort to gain another.
Even if we were to KNOW marriage is in your future, it does not mean you sit and wait.
6 “And the foreigners who join themselves to the Lord, to minister to him, to love the name of the Lord, and to be his servants, everyone who keeps the Sabbath and does not profane it, and holds fast my covenant—
SERVE
minister
love
servants
This means:
Not slowing down until marriage
Not settling for something spiritually less for something relationally more.
DO NOT settle for someone because you do not want to be lonely or you feel you NEED someone.
Pray for your family.
Pray for your family.
7 these I will bring to my holy mountain, and make them joyful in my house of prayer; their burnt offerings and their sacrifices will be accepted on my altar; for my house shall be called a house of prayer for all peoples.”
Spiritual family
for all peoples
Physical family
Pray for the family God has around you or you may have one day.
Conclusion
Conclusion
Your Facebook relationship status matters less than your spiritual relationship status.
What is your spiritual relationship status? What’s your relationship with Jesus?
— In a relationship?
— Single?
— It’s complicated?