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REVIEW
FOUNDATIONAL PRINCIPLE
1. “God’s power has given us everything we need to lead a godly life.” (2 Peter 1:3, NIrV)
Believe that ALL that I need is provided.
The issue becomes how do I apply it?
What’s in your box?
2. Everyone comes into relationships with their box
with my dreams, hopes desires
I get pushy with my box when you don’t just agree and go along with me.
Then I demand and expect you to give in, or to step aside, or to go along.
The best negotiator always wins, we had a plan and they beat us out. When someone wins the relationship losses.
When I win, we lose.
Because ‘you owe me’. (Not always is this the pattern, yet so many times we just assume our relationships will just be the way they are.)
FEELINGS
3. Beyond these expectations are the feelings: Feelings just are, they are not always rational, logical, not thought through, they are just what we want.
a. Respect
b. To be desired
c. Admired,
d. Cherished, protected, defended trusted prioritized, pursued, and to be considered attractive.
e. We want our partner to think that we have what it takes, while we often wonder to ourselves do I have what it takes?
4. TO unlock the ‘you owe me’ syndrome, and to keep our dreams desires and hopes from feeling like expectations, obligations we must keep thinking ‘she does not owe me’, he does not owe me. I have desires, I have expectations, but I am not owed. Drop the rope and put yourself at the back of the line.
5. Marriage is based on God’s plan for us, it is a mutual submission, submit therefore one to another. “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” (Ephesians 5:21, NIV)
RELATIONSHIP PRINCIPLE
DECIDE TO BE HEALTHY
No:
Pretending
Ignoring
Avoiding
Hiding
To be healthy it is a principle we must learn, otherwise we will be unhealthy
Pretender, we put on a happy face and act as if everything is just fine. This makes us weird, tired and worn out.
Ignoring our dreams hopes and desires. Kills the wonder, the joy, the hope in a relationships.
Staying busy hobbies that keep you apart, avoiding the family life, isolating. Bu that is not what you got married for. Not a positive role model for the kids.
\\ advice to married people//this is deep get ready.
Where ever you go, there you are. You go with you.
and whatever part of the relationship trouble you are you will take that with you. Swapping out people does not solve anything, you haven’t changed, and you still have the same hopes dreams and wishes that you make the other pick up.
NOBODY RUSHES INTO MARRIAGE SAYING “I want to take on someone else’s dreams hopes and desires. I want to give my life to someone else, I cant wait to put her first.
If you date someone and either one has been divorced, time is your friend. If divorced less than 2 years, don’t marry.
We don’t rush into a relationship because we want to be self-less with some new. No we are looking for our box to be filled.
1 Pe. 5:5b to 6
1 Peter 5:6–7 NIV
6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
WHY HUMBLE?
The New International Version (Chapter 5)
“God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”
Go small,
end of the line
Others first
WHY? ‘God opposes the proud’, do you really want to oppose God? You also pull back from the arrogant. People who try to squeeze out of you for their benefit.
God shows grace or favor to the humble. It is a promise when you humble yourself God gives you the strength you need endurance you need to do the right thing. Humility invites God’s presence.
1. ‘Humble yourselves under God’s mighty hand.’
Under authority protection, and in God’s hand so he can do the extraordinary for you.
Life will humble us we are to accept it if we are followers of Jesus.
2. ‘under God’s mighty hand’
3. ‘God opposes the proud’, do you really want to oppose God? You also pull back from the arrogant. People who try to squeeze out of you for their benefit.
God shows grace or favor to the humble. It is a promise when you humble your self God gives you the strength you need endurance you need to do the right thing. Humility invites God’s presence.
When you open your hands it is very hard to be defensive
Your brain and your body interact, so that open hands are the posture of openness and that makes it harder for us to clam up and attack.
Bob Goff, when law practice would tell his clients in a deposition, sit with your hands open your palms up under the table it will make it harder for you to get defensive. Try this at home.
Kneel to cast your cares upon God life your arms as a sign of desperation.
when FRUSTRATED START WITH TELLING GOD ALL ABOUT IT.
Humble yourself — go small
Under God’s mighty hand = protection
That HE may lift you up = honor
God opposes the proud = YOU DON’T WANT THAT
Cast all your anxiety on him = He cares for you
Kneel
Raise hands
Pray out loud.
Honest heart felt
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