Only in America

1. Only in America . . . can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America . . are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America . . . do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions, while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America . . . do people order double cheese burgers, large fries and a diet coke.

5. Only in America . . . do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counter.

6. Only in America . . . . do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our junk in the garage. Hello...

7. Only in America . . . .do we use answering machines to screen calls and have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America . . .do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America . . . do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering

10. Only in America . . .do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.