The Family of Christ

Scott Stewart

The Gospel of Matthew • Sermon • Submitted 3 years ago

Matthew 12:46–50

Family

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Those who Jesus considers His family are those who do the will of God.

Notes

Transcript

Opening Revelation

Psalm 119:25–32 ESV

25 My soul clings to the dust; give me life according to your word! 26 When I told of my ways, you answered me; teach me your statutes! 27 Make me understand the way of your precepts, and I will meditate on your wondrous works. 28 My soul melts away for sorrow; strengthen me according to your word! 29 Put false ways far from me and graciously teach me your law! 30 I have chosen the way of faithfulness; I set your rules before me. 31 I cling to your testimonies, O Lord; let me not be put to shame! 32 I will run in the way of your commandments when you enlarge my heart!

Text Matthew 12:46-50

Matthew 12:46–50 ESV

46 While he was still speaking to the people, behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. 48 But he replied to the man who told him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” 49 And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! 50 For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

Main Idea of the Text: Those who Jesus considers His family are those who do the will of God.

Introduction

For centuries, Christians have often struggled to figure out how family fits into their faith.

This struggle has produced various questions like:

How do we have loyalty to Christ and take care of family? //and//

Are we even supposed to have families?

Some traditions have even romanticized a monastic, celibate lifestyle where a person separates themselves from the world, ignoring “temptations” to follow the first command God ever gave mankind: “Be fruitful and multiply...” (Gen. 1:28a). Our verses today, if read in isolation from the context of the rest of the chapter, are often cited to serve such a purpose.

Let’s read what Jesus says about His family, and to those around Him today. My purpose today is to understand the context, determining for ourselves how we must apply this text to our own lives as Christians.

Matthew 12:46–50 ESV

Now, I hate inserting comments like this, but if you have a King James Version you probably noticed I “skipped” verse 47. Or if you were counting verses, you might’ve noticed that suddenly the text can’t count and “missed” verse 47. I didn’t skip it, nor is there a typo in your Bibles, it’s just not in any of the earlier copies of Matthew 12 that we have, and doesn’t appear until manuscripts dating hundreds of years after it was written. Therefore, it was most likely added by scribes closer to AD 500, or possibly not even until after 1455 when the Latin Vulgate was written.

If you would like to have a further conversation about this, now is not the time. Please email me and we can have coffee after this week.

So, let’s engage the text for what it means today. Let’s swallow our pride and listen to Jesus’ words, not squabbling over something this minor. If you would like to see a translation of verse 47, read your footnotes. It’s still there, just in case.

Body

I. Jesus faces opposition from His family (v. 46)

When reading these verses, Matthew doesn’t do us any favors by explaining why Jesus’ mother and brothers have come looking for Him, or even what they intended to say to Him. Why would Jesus speak this way about His own family, we are prone to ask. If you have a reference Bible, chances are you have both Mark 3:31 and Luke 8:19 listed as the same situation. But if we were to pick up and read them, we’d read the same cold-sounding statement of Christ without much explanation.

However, if we were to turn back 10 verses in Mark 3 to Mark 3:21. In that verse we do read a bit of extra context. We read that Jesus had grown very popular. His teachings and miraculous healings had stirred the pot and started shaking up the status quo of Judaism. Crowds were gathering around Him, and instead of celebrating His success His family was unhappy. We read in 3:21 that:

And when his family heard it, they went out to seize him, for they were saying, “He is out of his mind.”

This was how Jesus’ own earthly family felt about His success and growing popularity, His standing against the tide of the self-righteous religious elite called the Pharisees, and what they thought of His devotion to serving the One True God. The same God who had miraculously begotten Him and chosen Mary to birth His Son. They thought He was “out of His mind.”

Too add more clarity on how His earthly family thought of His works, we could read of another instance with Jesus’ family in John 7:1-5, where Jesus’ brothers tell Him how He should be doing His ministry, even. They say that Jesus should go up to a Jewish festival and almost put on a carnival show for the Jews.

They demand that He go do His works instead of celebrating the festival of booths…And, by the way, the point of that festival was to remember the works that God had done to preserve the Israelites in their 40-year-wanderings in the desert. In John 7:4 we read his brothers almost insultingly say:

For no one works in secret if he seeks to be known openly. If you do these things, show yourself to the world (Jn. 7:4).

And John also provides us some clarity on why they are telling Christ how He should do His ministry in v. 5. The Apostle John writes:

For not even his brothers believed in him.

Which brings us back to our situation in Matthew 12:46-50, as to some probable reasons why Jesus spoke the way He did about His family. They were not coming just for a brief visit, to offer support and prayer or to see how He was doing. No, they knew how He was doing, and so they were coming to oppose Him.

Think back on all of Matthew 12 over these past several weeks. We have seen Christ be opposed by the scribes and Pharisees, some of which are even conspiring to kill Him in secret (Matthew 12:14). He’s been challenged by them as they try to incite crowds against Him, and Jesus has disarmed each situation in just the right way.

And here we have Jesus’ own family opposing Him from following God’s will for Him. I don’t know what Mary would’ve said to Jesus, but knowing mothers in our culture it would’ve probably sounded like this:

I changed your diapers. I know you, and you are doing something dangerous. Look at all these people! Do you know what a stir you’re creating? Tone it down!

And while I don’t know what any of Jesus’ brothers would’ve specifically said, I imagine they would’ve said something like this:

We always knew you were strange, and we’re getting a lot of flack being related to you. Cool it!

But Jesus couldn’t have obeyed such demands from his family. He was on a mission, and He couldn’t be deterred from completing that mission even by those who changed His diapers and who played with Him growing up.

Application: Often, when we are doing what the Lord has for us we will face opposition from family. They will try and stand in our way, making us feel guilty or bad for doing what we know we have to do, to tell us that we are making a mistake. We, like our Lord, must stand firm and convinced in our own convictions rooted in the clear teaching of Scripture. If we are truly doing the Lord’s will, we must not grow weary of doing the good works that the Lord has planned for us (Gal. 6:9, Eph. 2:10). Therefore, we must not be deterred, even by family, if we are following along with Christ and doing as He has called us.

II. Jesus’ concern is for His spiritual family (vv. 48-49)

Notice here who Jesus was focused on. In v. 46 we see that Jesus was “still speaking to the people” when His mother and brothers arrive, searching for Him. Then, in response to them searching for Him, He announces to the crowd these questions: “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?”

Imagine being in this crowd when Jesus asked these questions. Um, those people out there looking for you, Jesus. The answer seems so simple and easy, and His response makes it seem like He is “above” His earthly family if we misread it. Christ has not forgotten who His mother and brothers are, He’s trying to make a point.

In verse 49 we see that point, as Jesus points toward His disciples and announces them as His family. “Here are my mother and my brothers,” Christ says.

What Jesus is saying here is that His true concern is not for His earthly family, but for His spiritual family. In effect, it sounds like Jesus is dismissing His earthly family and saying that these men are His real family.

But let’s pause on this point for a moment to establish something very important to our text. We’ve already established that Jesus’ family was most likely coming to oppose Him, but did Jesus really cut off His family?

III. Jesus did not abandon His family (Clarification cf. John 19:25-27)

Stepping into the Near and Middle Eastern cultural values of the time, we have to understand that the “family” was the most valued relationship above any other. It is in this culture that we really see some incredible devotion from sons, especially.

If a father of a family died, his oldest son would be obligated to take in his mother and probably even his younger sisters in order to care for them and marry them off. The mother would live out her days under her oldest son’s roof.

But then you have things that Jesus has said, even things we’ve covered previously in Matthew. Things like Matthew 10:37, where Jesus says:

“Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”

Or in Matthew 8:21-22 where a disciple asks Jesus if he can go take a break to bury his father and Jesus says “Follow me, and leave the dead to bury their own dead.”

Christ has challenged some of the familial-cultural links in order to explain that allegiance to God supersedes allegiance to blood-relatives. And it would be easy to misunderstand Jesus here and think that He condones no allegiance to family; to even think that Jesus is allowing a full abandonment of family-ties.

But that’s simply not true. It’s not true in Matthew 12, 8, or 10. Why do I say this? Because of the overwhelming evidence that Jesus not abandon His familial responsibilities.

For example, remember how I said that the responsibility of the oldest son was to care for his mother if his father were dead? That responsibility fell to Jesus as the oldest Son in His family after Joseph died. And Joseph is probably even dead when Christ said these words, because Joseph is not mentioned past Jesus’ childhood. Even more evidence is found at Jesus’ crucifixion. How Jesus handled taking care of His own mother.

He gives the Apostle John the responsibility to care for His mother Mary. In John 19:25-27 we read:

John 19:25–27 (ESV)

25 but standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. 26 When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple whom he loved [which is John] standing nearby, he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son!” 27 Then he said to the disciple, “Behold, your mother!” And from that hour the disciple [again, John] took her to his own home.

Even though Jesus did not allow His mother and brothers to come into the gathering of Matthew 12:46-50, to oppose Him and impede His mission, He did not abandon His family altogether. He fulfilled the duty of the oldest son, caring for His own mother when He was crucified.

Also, after Jesus’ resurrection, He appeared to His own brother James (1 Cor. 15:7). Our Lord did care about His own family. It was only when they were trying to stop Him from doing what He was called to do that He rebuked them and used them as an example. He knew His true priorities, but He never once condoned abandoning familial duties. He only condoned focusing on matters of first-importance (the mission of the gospel) as more important than His earthly family.

Application: We, too, must remember our first priorities of following God and doing His will first, but also caring for our own families. We must ensure their safety and care. We must remember that God providentially placed us in our families to care for their needs. I dare even to say that it is a coward’s job to abandon His family. To be given children by the hand of the Lord and to abandon them for the sake of convenience is not the way of God. Those who have grown up fatherless due to cowardly fathers know experientially that this is an abomination to them, but it is even moreso in the Lord’s eyes.

Our mission is to do the Lord’s will, and just as it was God the Father’s will to have Jesus born into the family He was born into, so it was God’s will that you were born into the family you were born into. Your Christian duty is to care that family, and also the family that was birthed to you. But, your care for them must never impede you from doing what God has commanded you to do. If your family is encouraging you to sin, then your duty is to rebuke them as Christ did His own family here. Perhaps you even have to separate yourself from them, praying that God’s will is to be done as He sees fit with them.

IV. Jesus’ mission: Building His spiritual family (v. 50)

Speaking of Christ’s family, how blessed it is to be considered a brother or sister to Jesus. To look at your Lord and call Him your brother, that’s what’s promised in verse 50. “For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

In the first century, it was common that only men could be disciples of a rabbi. To be considered close with a teacher, you had to be male. But here Christ is shattering that aspect of His culture, saying that “whoever does the will of [His] Father in heaven is [His] brother and sister and mother.”

I wouldn’t add much to the aspect of “mother” here, because it is only natural for Jesus to use that example considering His own mother was outside. But think of how focused Jesus is on growing His spiritual family here. That’s His mission! That’s His purpose! To make disciples like those He stretched His arms out toward and pointed at.

While Christ had His ministry on earth, He was singularly focused on doing as His Father commanded. His role was to prove His messiahship through miraculous works and teachings, culminating in His death for sin, burial, and resurrection conquering the inevitable effect of sin: death.

Now, we are empowered to join with our Lord on that mission in making disciples of all nations, doing that Great Commission work that He calls us to. Giving us that great promise “And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age” (Matthew 28:20b).

If you are doing as you know the Lord has for you, you are the Lord’s disciple, His younger sibling. You are His family. You are the ones invited into His presence and given His warm gaze of approval and love.

But if you are standing in the way of His Great Commission that He has tasked His disciples with, then you are the one being rebuked in this passage. You are not those who are welcomed into conversation and fellowship with God, but the one who is standing outside being used as an example against loyalty to God.

Do not stand in opposition to Christ. Do not go against that which the Lord commands of you to do, to humbly repent of your sin and receive His forgiveness given the bloody stamp of His death on the cross. Blessed is the one who is not offended by Christ (Matthew 11:6), and that includes not being offended by His rebuke of His own family. His family who thought He was crazy, who wanted Him to sin against God and fail in His mission.

Application: These words of Christ are hard, but they are necessary for us to remember that we are to be focused on doing the will of God regardless of who stands against us.

Conclusion

So, how are we to remember and apply this text? We are to realize:

Jesus’ own family stood to impede Him from doing what God the Father had called Him to

Jesus considers those who do the will of God to be His family

Jesus did not abandon His earthly family, nor does He condone such an action

We must join Christ in His mission of making disciples of all nations, lest we be stuck on the outside of His mission and on the outside of His mercy

When we are doing what God has called us to do, we will face opposition. Because of sin’s horrible existence in this world, we will face opposition from those who we think are spiritual, from those who are successful in this world, and even from our own family who thinks we’re crazy.

Whether the Lord is steering us to do overseas missions in dangerous places, or to replant a church in a rural town on the Oregon coast, there will always be those who want to destroy the work of God. They will usually think they’re doing either us or God a favor in doing so, but remember that you are the Lord’s family only if you are doing His will.

Seek the Lord’s will in His Word, remember His calling and mission, and join Him in it.