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Codependency: What Is It?
A Simple Definition of Codependency:
To depend on someone for something that we have no right to expect from them.
A codependent life style is a miserable, fearful, life.
From never feeling secure, to the need to always be in control, the extremes of codependency fuel the chaos and pain in our lives.
The Children of the Devil
John 8:42 Jesus said to them, “If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and now am here.
I have not come on my own; but he sent me.
43 Why is my language not clear to you?
Because you are unable to hear what I say.
44 You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desire.
He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him.
When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.
45 Yet because I tell the truth, /you do not believe me!/
 
/The Fall of Man/
*3**/     /Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made.
He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?” *
*2 The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,  3 but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’”
*
*4 “You will not surely die,” the serpent said to the woman.
5 “For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”
*
*6 When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it.
She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.
7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.
*
*8 Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden.
9 But the LORD God called to the man, “Where are you?”
*
*10 He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.” *
*11 And he said, “Who told you that you were naked?
Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?” *
*12 The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.”
*
*13 Then the LORD God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?”
*
The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”
Genesis 1-2 recorded what God said; now the serpent (the devil, Rev. 20:2) spoke.
The word of the Lord brought life and order; the word of the serpent brought chaos and death.
Truth is older than falsehood; God’s word came before Satan’s lies.
* *
* *
THE MESSAGE OF “MORE STUFF” vs. FAITH
 
*Isa 61:1The Spirit of the Lord GOD /is/ upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to /them that are/ bound;*
* *
*Today I want to talk to you about your righteousness and holiness!
(Take everything you do…)*
* *
One of the greatest potential messages to come down through the gospel highway in years has been the *message of faith*.
Like anything with great potential for good, there is also great potential for harm when this message falls into the domain of the codependent leader.
No matter how great the truth, the codependent will always manipulate the message for personal validation.
When I first began to hear the faith message, it was as pure as the driven snow.
For the first time, I heard people preach many things I had believed and heard.
It was such a confirmation.
In the beginning there was much emphasis on the finished work of Jesus, faith, righteousness, and the goodness of God.
Like every movement, though, the followers don’t have the heart of the leaders.
Codependency crept in, and in less than a decade, a message that has so much potential to heal, began to bring forth its potential harm
 
The first trouble was the apparent lack of emphasis on a relationship with Jesus.
*(Keep Your Eyes On Jesus!)* Obviously, many of the original leaders had strong, meaningful relationships with the Lord that empowered their faith.
True to form, however, as the codependent followers assimilated the message of faith they left out the relationship with God (faith) and kept the formulas (works~/stuff).
Before long, them emphasis on God and His faithfulness had been pushed aside for the message of how much man had to do to get God to respond.
It had become man-centered.
The message of faith has very subtly changed from:
* *
*our reponse of trust to what God has done, *
*To:*
*how we can get God to respond by what we can do.
*
 
*The man-centered message of works (stuff) crept in, and perverted the message of faith, righteousness, and God, and robbed it of its power.*
*What once glorified God, now glorified the faith of man.*
The very first foundation of the faith is *“repentance from dead works.”
*Hebrews 6:1.
The dead works he mentioned is not all of the sinful things he did before he got saved.
It was all of the religious things he did to earn God’s approval.
Under the Law, man did things to try to get God to respond.
Under the New Covenant, God did everything in Jesus.
He now gives us the opportunity to respond to what he has done.
*Faith is a response of trust.*
Unbelief responds by de-emphasizing what God has done and placing the burden to perform back on man*.
It places man at the center.*
*Otherwise, the codependent would have to trust God and His integrity.*
* *
By the message of faith being twisted to what we must do to get God to respond, we come up with all manner of wrong questions.
*1.               **How much faith does it take to get God to move?*
*2.               **How can I make my faith stronger?*
*3.               **How long do I have to believe?*
*4.               **Why isn’t God doing anything for me?*
*5.               **Is sin blocking my faith?*
6.               *I am not healed I must not have enough faith.*
In all of Jesus’ teachings about faith, He never emphasized how much it took, as much as He emphasized how little it took*.
(Mustard Seed Faith)* *Our problem with God is rarely a lack of faith, as much as it is the abundance of unbelief.*
Every man and woman has a measure of faith.
We believed God for the greatest miracle that would ever happen *with infant faith*; *we got born again.*
God changed our very nature.
There is no miracle any greater.
Why should anything else require more faith?
*READ:* In some circles, the proof that you had faith became the amount of “stuff” you had.
If you had a lot of stuff, you must obviously have a lot of faith.
Getting the stuff, so you could prove you had the faith, became more important than knowing and serving God.
For many, what had originally been presented as trusting and walking with God became an attempt to get a lot of “stuff” so you wouldn’t need God.
Security came when a person was convinced he had enough faith to get all the “stuff” he wanted.
*In other words “doing works.”
Look at me and what I can do!
Your really know I’m full of faith because “I” can do this and that!
I have STUFF!*
Once again, codependent people twisted truth and de-emphasized a meaningful relationship with God.
Security was found in the amount of faith (STUFF) one could prove that one had.
The codependent heart will pervert and twist any message away from God, to a place of dependency on other things i.e., *“WORKS~/STUFF.”*
With this twist, the standard answer for every problem simply became, *“You don’t have enough faith~/STUFF.”*
Once again the emphasis was placed on what you don’t have in Jesus, instead of what you do have.
*Man was once again made to be incomplete and inadequate*.
LIE LIE LIE!
 
Remember, one of the basic goals of the codependent is control.
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