The Home of the Righteous

Before a man can oversee the church, he must be able to oversee his home. And that can be applied to the whole character of a believer. What is seen in public must first be evident in the home.

In Proverbs, there are a few references to the qualities of righteousness as they relate to the home.

1. The Legacy in the Righteous Home

Pr 11:21

[21] "Though hand join in hand, the wicked shall not be unpunished: But the seed of the righteous shall be delivered.”

“Though hand join in hand” > co-operation; alliance >> majority opinion

“Most people agree” or “It’s the will of the people”

Understand that in a society that has mostly rejected God and the Bible, a democaacy is the best of the options available, and where we are blessed to have a democracy, it’s right that the believers engage with it and seek to be salt and light.

There are some who won’t engage with elections because they say they are of the world and we are to be separate from the world. Separation from the world is about not surrending to worldly values; it’s not about isolating ourselves from society.

The Lord Himself said:

Jn 17:15

[15] "I pray not that thou shouldest take them out of the world, but that thou shouldest keep them from the evil.”

That in a nutshell is the principle of separation but not isolation.

We should take part in elections. The results of elections have a bearing on the morality of the society we and our children have to live in. It’s the height of hypocrisy to claim to be salt and light, bemoaning the moral state of society, yet not seeking to be salt and light in the selection of those who shape our society.

But we also need to acknowledge the failings of democracy - namely, that the majority rarely make right moral judgments.

This verse is reminding us that although groups of people may agree and join forces, and although they may form the majority opinion, that doesn’t make bad things good; it doesn’t change sin into righteousness, or immorality into morality.

Just because society as a whole says something is right doesn’t make it right; and just because society condemns biblical morality doesn’t make biblical morality wrong.

Why do they do this? Why does society always tend towards the immoral?

Because of pride. Sinners don’t want to acknowledge the sinfulness of their sin. They’re too proud to admit they’re sinners. And so they simply redefine the conditions for what is right and wrong. In their pride, they proclaim God and the Bible are irrelevant and out-of-touch with reality, and they form their own moral framework.

We can see this in another verse in Proverbs that has similarities to this text:

Pr 16:5

[5] "Every one that is proud in heart is an abomination to the Lord: Though hand join in hand, he shall not be unpunished.”

It’s this pride that offends God so much.

So when churches proudly reject the clear teaching of Scripture and start to admit members of the LGBTQ+ community into membership, and even into their pulpits, that pride is an abomination to God.

When believers proudly criticise or condemn those whose doctrine doesn’t align completely with their own, that pride is an abomination to God.

This proverb also shows us that when the majority joins forces to redefine morality, it will not stop God from judging them. The word “unpunished” means free, clean, or guiltless. The use of a double negative here - “shall NOT go UNpunished” - is used for emphasis. In other words, there is no way that they will escape punishment.

This is also the truth we see in Psalm 2:

Ps 2:2–5

[2] "The kings of the earth set themselves, And the rulers take counsel together, Against the Lord, and against his anointed, saying,

[3] "Let us break their bands asunder, And cast away their cords from us.

[4] "He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh: The Lord shall have them in derision.

[5] "Then shall he speak unto them in his wrath, And vex them in his sore displeasure.”

Although the governments of the world align themselves against God, their judgment will come and God’s wrath will fall.

In contrast to this is the righteous.

“…the seed of the righteous shall be delivered.”

In the book of Proverbs, we need to be careful to distinguish between promises and principles. As a general rule of thumb, statements that are directly linked to God’s attributes may be promises, but otherwise they are principles.

This verse contains a principle, not a promise. This verse is not a promise that every child of a saved person will get saved.

If the child is proud and defies God’s holiness or excuse their own wickedness and sin, they too will not go unpunished.

The word “delivered” carries the idea of fleeing for one’s life to the One who can save, and so the principle in this verse is that a righteous life lived in the home before our children can cause them to flee to the cross for rescue.

If I were to ask you to indicate how many were saved as a child of saved parents, I could almost be sure that the majority of hands would go up (even though I wouldn’t be able to see them!).

The truth is that righteousness in the parents increases the likelihood of the children trusting in Christ. But they need to see it. They need to see righteousness. And so all those attributes we have seen so far become even more important: our words, our actions, our mind and attitudes, our maturity in the faith - they all contribute to the picture of righteousness we portray to our children.

There are two exhortations we need to take from this:

We need to make sure our lives are righteous at home

We can’t afford to put our righteousness on for public view only. What the public sees openly must be what our children see privately. Otherwise we are hypocrites and become an obstacle to the salvation or spiritual growth of our children. We need to be very careful about being consistently righteous, home or away.

We need to keep praying for our children.

Righteousness consistently displayed only encourages a right response from our children - it doesn’t guarantee it. Again, this is a principle, not a promise.

And so we must also be consistent in praying that our children would come to know God personally and that they will grow in their faith.

That’s why righteousness is so important at home - it can determine the legacy we leave behind in our children.

2. The Lifestyle in the Righteous Home

Two verses for this - first:

Pr 12:7

[7] "The wicked are overthrown, and are not: But the house of the righteous shall stand.”

I want to show you two ways of interpreting this verse.

The first is prophetically.

One day the wicked will be judged and cast out of God’s presence into the Lake of Fire. We can see a predetermined destiny for all those who reject Christ. This is certain, and in terms of their presence before God and our awareness of them, they “are not” - they are gone forever into eternal punishment.

Now we can say that easily as a doctrinal fact, but let’s not forget that these are our family members we’re talking about - our mothers and fathers, our brothers and sisters, our sons and daughters, aunts, uncles, nephews, nieces, friends, neighbours, work colleagues, acquaintances - people we know and have conversations with today could tomorrow be in Hell. They are included in this term, “the wicked”, because they have refused to repent of their sin and accept Christ as their Saviour. If they continue in that state, then this is their fate - they “are overthrown, and are not”.

On the other hand, “the house of the righteous shall stand” - we have an eternal, permanent home, a place being prepared for us by the Lord Jesus Christ Himself. That too is certain. It’s a sure promise, a fact of salvation, that those whom Christ has saved will be forever with Him, glorying in His presence.

We need to have a grasp of both of these truths - one to motivate us to prayer and sharing of the gospel, the other to encourage us and give us hope in times of trial.

The second way we can interpret this verse is practically.

The “wicked” can be understand as those who hold ideas, values, standards, and beliefs that are contrary to the truth of God’s Word. These philosophies are shown to be worthless. When compared to God’s Word, they lack credibility; they are without objective evidence. They can’t stand up against the truth. When tested, they lack any legitimate coherence or basic foundation, because they’re all based on the unfounded theories of men.

But when we read, “the house of the righteous shall stand”, it’s both a means of identification and an exhortation. What do I mean?

How can we identify the home where righteousness reigns? That will be a house that stands firm concerning the truth. It will be a house where there are convictions, and consistency. And that’s the lifestyle of the righteous home - a lifestyle that’s consistent with the Word of God in beliefs and in actions.

The easiest place to act like a righteous person is in church, where all eyes are on you and you’re surrounded by people with Bibles, there are hymns being sung, prayers offered, the Bible is being taught - it’s easy to behave in a righteous way in church.

But at home, we’ve got daily life to deal with. We’ve got homeschooling to keep up with; we’ve got the usual huffiness and temper tantrums that can happen with anyone; we’ve got bills to pay, work to do, family dramas to contend with - and on top of that, we’re expected to stay righteous. Sometimes the righteous part can be unintentionally forgotten about. It can be overtaken by busyness and deadlines and everything that goes on in a normal home.

That’s why righteousness isn’t merely about acting righteous - it’s about thinking and being righteous. Righteousness needs to become a permanent character trait - and that only comes with time, determination and surrender to the Holy Spirit within.

But when righteousness becomes an integral part of the home, that’s a home that’s seen to be spiritually strong and consistent.

And so, the lifestyle of the righteous home is one of CONSISTENCY.

But it’s also one of CONTENTMENT.

Pr 15:6

[6] "In the house of the righteous is much treasure: But in the revenues of the wicked is trouble.”

This proverb isn’t a simple contrast and compare.

We know that both righteous and wicked can become rich, but the wicked have an added complication to their riches.

The righteous person who has wealth and riches doesn’t focus on that wealth. It doesn’t become something they love. It’s not their raison d’etre - their reason for living. Because they are righteous, they keep their wealth in its proper perspective. And so, they aren’t trying to grasp onto it at all costs, not constantly trying to add to it, not resenting it when the people next door have something bigger and better and more than they themselves have. There’s no covetousness within them, and so the wealth doesn’t have a hold on them.

The wicked, on the other hand, could have just as much wealth, if not more - the word “revenues” speaks of harvests or profits - we’re not talking about people just scraping by, but those whose wealth is increasing all the time, but with it comes trouble.

Why? Because their attitude towards their wealth is so different. They’re never satisfied with what they have. They love their wealth; they want to add to it, want to outdo the wealth of others. They aren’t content with keeping up with the Joneses - they want to overtake them. And so they resent the success of others. They can become hoarders of their wealth, stingey, lacking generosity, miserly. Their children can grow up with the same attitude as the parents, wanting to get as much of the inheritance as they can get their hands on, leading to rivalry and ill-feeling between siblings.

So we see the difference between the lifestyles of these houses - one is consistent in belief and behaviour, while the other has ideas that are built on straw.

One is content with what the Lord has given, while the other is never satisfied.

Which house is yours? Which is mine? It’s so easy for believers’ houses to be more like the wicked than the righteous. Let’s make sure our houses, our lifestyles are righteous.

3. The Leadership in the Righteous Home

Pr 23:24

[24] "The father of the righteous shall greatly rejoice: And he that begetteth a wise child shall have joy of him.”

There is actually equal emphasis in this verse on the father and his child.

In the first half...

Pr 23:24

[24] "The father of the righteous shall greatly rejoice...

no matter whether the father of the child is righteous or not, he can be pleased and satisfied with his child’s righteous character. There’s many an unsaved father that has been proud of the man or woman their saved child has become. He can take great pleasure and be truly thankful for the godly life that’s lived by them.

For those whose parents aren’t saved, your life of righteous can speak louder to them than any words could.

I know that witnessing to family is one of the hardest things to do, but if the Lord gives the opportunity, it should be taken. Yet that isn’t always possible. The attitudes of unsaved family may have closed the door to their own children or grandchildren verbally sharing the gospel with them.

But they can be a gospel message with shoes on. They can live righteously, and that righteous life can be used by the Holy Spirit to bring unsaved family under conviction of sin. As they see what true righteous is, and not just religion, it can shine a light on their own sinfulness and cause them to become convicted.

So keep yourself humbly righteous, and you never know how God will move.

But look as well at the second half of the verse.

Pr 23:24

[24] "... And he that begetteth a wise child shall have joy of him.”

This wise child means a wise, experienced, or skilled child.

Now we all know that we can’t tell what a child is going to be like when they’re born. If you get a chance, look up pictures of children who grew up to be bad people, and it will prove the point.

How do we know a child is wise, experienced, or skilled? Only with time.

With time we can begin to see that wisdom, esperience, and skill grow and develop, and that brings praise and joy and delight to a parent.

Pr 23:15

[15] "My son, if thine heart be wise, My heart shall rejoice, even mine.”

Pr 10:1

[1] "A wise son maketh a glad father...”

How can we make it more likely our children will in turn grow up to be righteous, filled with wisdom, experience, and skill?

Pr 22:6

[6] "Train up a child in the way he should go: And when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

Eph 6:4

[4] "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

So if we train up a child like this, what will they be like?

They will be hard-working

Pr 10:5

[5] "He that gathereth in summer is a wise son: But he that sleepeth in harvest is a son that causeth shame.”

They will be humble, willing to be instructed

Pr 13:1

[1] "A wise son heareth his father’s instruction: But a scorner heareth not rebuke.”

They will honour the Scriptures

Pr 28:7

[7] "Whoso keepeth the law is a wise son: But he that is a companion of riotous men shameth his father.”

To bring up children like this takes leadership in the home. They need to see that example at work in practical ways in the home, so that they can learn to follow those righteous examples from their parents and grow to be righteous men and women themselves.

This is the home of the righteous - one in which the legacy, the lifestyle, and the leadership produce character traits of righteousness in the generations to come.

Ps 78:4

[4] "We will not hide them from their children, Shewing to the generation to come The praises of the Lord, and his strength, And his wonderful works that he hath done.”

Ps 78:6–7

[6] "That the generation to come might know them, even the children which should be born; Who should arise and declare them to their children:

[7] "That they might set their hope in God, And not forget the works of God, But keep his commandments:”