Overcoming Anger (Eph. 4:26)

Stephen Jones

Ephesians • Sermon • Submitted 3 years ago

Ephesians 4:26

Anger

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Introduction: Why study this topic?

A. We need to connect faith to obedience (John 3:36; 14:15; James 2:14f) We have been learning much about salvation and the person and work of Jesus Christ: Jn. 1:12-13; 3:3; 4:14; 5:24; Danger of an ‘intellectual’ rather than vibrant, living faith, devoid of works

John 14:15 “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.

James 2:14 What use is it, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but he has no works? Can that faith save him?

B. We need to investigate the concept of “righteous anger”

C. We need to address the pervasive problem of anger (Ps. 37:8; Prov. 14:29) –

Psalm 37:8 Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing.

Proverbs 14:29 He who is slow to anger has great understanding, But he who is quick-tempered exalts folly.

At the root of many marital problems; 90% of counseling; all of us can be guilty

Think of person or situation when you most get angry and apply this teaching to that person: boss, spouse, child, other drivers

Proverbs 12:15 The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, But a wise man is he who listens to counsel.

So before we go any further, let’s pray for God’s help

A Glimpse at Anger

A. Illustration: Mary and David

The house was finally quiet again, but Mary sat on the couch, her head buried in her hands, still sobbing. 10 minutes earlier, she and her husband David had been in their worst argument yet. Mary tried to think back to what had caused this, and how their night had ended up such a disaster. It all started when David arrived home from work. It was obvious he’d had a bad day at the office; the evening commute hadn’t helped matters any. He mumbled a greeting to his wife and then plopped in his chair to read the paper. When dinner wasn’t ready on time, he asked why it was taking so long. Mary, already tired after a long day of errands and watching the kids, responded that “it would sure go a lot faster if she could have some help in the kitchen.” David snapped back that he’d had a really hard day and she never appreciated how hard his job was. Things just escalated from there. Soon, voices were raised, and Mary and David were engaged in all-out verbal combat, like two battleships exchanging fire at close range. The kids retreated into their rooms to escape the conflict. Then David did something he had never done before. He picked up a glass, threw it against the wall, and stormed out the door. Clearly this family has a problem with anger.

This is often what we think of when we hear of “anger”: tempers flaring, red faces, harsh words, perhaps even violence. But in fact…

B. Anger is an emotion which is morally neutral.

· Simply put, It is an expression of strong displeasure.

· Anger is one of God’s attributes (Ps. 7:11). We are made in His image.

C. Nevertheless, most of our anger is sinful.

D. The consequences are serious. (Prov. 29:22; Jam. 3:5)

The Biblical Process of Change

A. God’s Word is sufficient(sufficient) and must guide any change (2 Tim. 3:16-17)

B. Three components in our behavior: the situation, the response (anger, depression, lust, substance abuse), and the heart

C. Two common sinful responses of anger: ‘blow up’ (Prov. 29:11; Gen. 4:6-8) or ‘clam up’ (Eph. 4:26; Jonah 4:1-5)

D. What is the actual cause of our anger? Internal: the heart (Mk. 7:20-23)

·External: the situation. This is the immediate cause.

·Internal: the heart. The “heart” refers to our thoughts, choices, motives, desires, and conscience. It is the “control center” of our life and dictates our behavior. It is the primary/actual (primary/actual) cause of our anger (Mk. 7:20-23). Its main activity is worship(worship). This is where genuine change must begin.

We looked at Cain and Jonah in the Bible this morning. Can you think of any other examples of unrighteous anger in the Bible?

In what situations do you find yourself tempted to get angry?

We looked at several examples of ‘blowing’ up this morning. What are some possible signs that a person is ‘clamming up’ in anger? Giving the silent treatment, depression, uncontrolled emotions, severe shyness, diminishing romance with spouse, ulcers, language like “you never, you always…”; realize that it can have a compounding effect.

Practical Steps to Overcoming Anger

A. Going to the cross

· Make sure you’re saved. Anger could be a sign that you really don’t know Christ. No true change is possible without the new birth (Ezek. 36:27)

· Remember the infinite debt Christ paid for you (Matt. 18:21-35)

· Remember that you only deserve hell. And apart from the grace of God, you would already be there (Eph. 2:3)

B. Depending on God’s grace

· Admit that Christ alone is your source of strength (John 15:5)

· Pray for God’s deliverance (Matt. 6:13)

· Take courage that God will provide a way of escape (1 Cor. 10:13)

C. Putting off sinful behavior (Eph. 4:17, 20-24)

· Stop responding in anger (Eph. 4:31) – If you can control it in church, on the job, etc., then you can control it elsewhere. Journal, count to ten, etc.

· Stop being selfish (Phil. 2:3-4)

· Stop associating with angry people (Prov. 22:24-25)

D. Putting on godly behavior

· Let love cover a multitude of sins (Prov. 10:12; 1 Pet. 4:8)

· Seek forgiveness from God and others (Matt. 5:21-24)

· Think about others and be kind toward them (Eph. 4:32; Phil. 2:3-4)

· Thank God for what He has given to you

How to Distinguish Righteous from Unrighteous Anger

Anger is simply an emotion of strong displeasure.

A. Biblical teaching on righteous anger

· God Himself is angry against sin (Ps. 7:11)

· God explicitly says to be angry but not to sin (Eph. 4:26)

· God asks people if they are angry for the right reason (Jonah 4:4)

· Many examples in the Bible of righteous anger: Jesus (John 2:13f); Moses (Ex. 32:19); Haggai

There is such a thing as righteous anger. In fact, it is a gift from God. Remember, anger is simply an emotion of strong displeasure. We should only be angry at things that make God angry, and we should only be angry in ways approved by God in His Word. The situation, response, and heart motive must all be biblical.

· What about passages that seem to denounce anger altogether? Eph. 4:31 and Col. 3:8 are in a “shopping list” of sinful behavior, so the anger in these verses should be understood as “unrighteous anger.” To the Ephesians, Paul had just said a few verses earlier (Eph. 4:26) that not all anger is sin. James 1:20 speaks of anger and resentment against God’s Word

B. Quotes from Christian leaders

· John MacArthur: “[In Eph. 4:26], Paul may have been sanctioning righteous indignation, anger at evil. This type of anger hates injustice, immorality, ungodliness, and every other sin. When such anger is unselfish and based on love for God and others, it not only is permissible but commanded.” (MacArthur Study Bible notes)

· Jim Berg: “Anger can be righteous when the displeasure is aimed at the same things that God is displeased with, when it makes the same demands that God makes, and when it sets out to destroy (change) those things that God opposes.” (Changed into His Image, 320)

· Alexander Strauch: “The Bible doesn’t say love does not get angry; it says love is not easily provoked to anger or irritation. There is righteous, controlled anger motivated by love and opposed to evil and falsehood that senselessly destroys people. But love is not provoked in a destructive sense because of wrong motives” (Leading with Love, 66-67)

C. How to evaluate your anger:

· What is the situation that is causing me to feel angry? Does this situation make God angry?

· Are my thoughts, motives, and desires God-centered rather than self-centered?

· Am I responding only in ways approved by God’s Word?

Rather than directing our anger toward others or internalizing that energy, it must be directed at the solution to the problem.

· Am I giving this over quickly to God and not allowing it to fester?

If I can answer “yes” to each of these questions, then I am exhibiting righteous anger

D. A few examples of righteous anger

·William Wilberforce - situation (slave trade), heart (God’s image), response (prayer, influence within lawful means)

·situation (millions aborted), heart (God’s image, murder, confusion, selfishness), response (prayer, involvement, adoption)

·situation (apathy, misplaced priorities, failure to build temple), heart (God’s glory, obedience), response (prophets and leaders rallied people to build)

·situation (unbelief), heart (God’s glory, Satan’s deception of lost), response (prayer, evangelism)

·situation (interpersonal conflict), heart (love, unity, forgiveness), response (prayer, effort to resolve)