Brothers Reconciled
Notes
Transcript
Brothers Reconciled
Genesis 33:1-20
The dread that filled Jacob as he prepared to meet Esau was grounded in the mean facts of the life-altering humiliations that he had dealt his older brother—first, when he conned Esau, who while in a dismissive mood sold him his birthright; and, second, when he dressed up as Esau and stole Esau’s blessing from their father Isaac. These humiliating tricks left Esau muttering, “Is he not rightly named Jacob? For he has cheated me these two times. He took away my birthright, and behold, now he has taken away my blessing.”
He then tearfully pleaded, “Have you but one blessing, my father? Bless me, even me also, O my father.” Esau could only take dark comfort in visions of homicide. And now, for all Jacob knew, the twenty intervening years had only refined his brother’s murderous intent.
Still, Jacob had to meet Esau. Making things right, and hopefully achieving reconciliation, had become a heart-necessity for Jacob. As Jacob had grown in grace, his conscience wouldn’t allow him to sidestep an attempt at reconciliation. Meeting Esau was a spiritual necessity.
What a jolt, then, when the ominous answer to his peaceful and generous overture was that Esau was coming with four hundred men.
Jacob didn’t know it, but as he prepared for the dreaded encounter, a greater dread would grip him throughout the long night until dawn in an epic wrestling match. And, he didn’t know that was preparation—necessary preparation—for meeting Esau. God had to deal with Jacob before Jacob could deal with Esau.
As Jacob stood wobbling in the rising light of the morning sun, he was awestruck by the revelation that he had been wrestling God in angelic form (who had accommodated himself to Jacob’s puny strength).
And Jacob had acquired two new distinctives: a new crippling that would serve as a reminder of that night and his weakness, and a new name—Israel (“God fights”)—that would come to celebrate him as one who fights with God.
Jacob’s strength, paradoxically, was in his weakness. The new name signaled his new character and was prophetic of his future development. The encounter was a transforming event, but Jacob had a long way to go. He was still Jacob as well as being Israel. But there had been spiritual advance.
Now as the crippled, God-struck patriarch lifted his sleepless eyes, a further surprise rocked him.
And Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, Esau was coming, and four hundred men with him. So he divided the children among Leah and Rachel and the two female servants.
1 And Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, Esau was coming, and four hundred men with him…
Though exhausted, Jacob frantically arranged his family for formal presentation to Esau.
And Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, Esau was coming, and four hundred men with him. So he divided the children among Leah and Rachel and the two female servants.
And he put the servants with their children in front, then Leah with her children, and Rachel and Joseph last of all.
He himself went on before them, bowing himself to the ground seven times, until he came near to his brother.
Though hobbled, Jacob preceded his four wives and twelve children in a courtly greeting ceremony, bowing flat-out seven times as he approached Esau, as was fitting in a court of a Pharaoh. Ironically, Jacob’s bowing was the reverse of the blessing that he had stolen for himself, which stipulated to Jacob, “Be lord over your brothers, and may your mother’s sons bow down to you.” Jacob’s reversal here expressed his sorrow over his shameful theft of Isaac’s blessing.
Surprise Reconciliation
Surprise Reconciliation
To Jacob’s surprise, however, Esau would have no more of this bowing and scraping.
But Esau ran to meet him and embraced him and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept.
Esau charged Jacob as he stood uncertainly, threw his arms around him, and kissed him! And in that brotherly embrace the two men wept uncontrollably. Esau was beautiful here. Whatever his intention had been up to that moment, the sight of Jacob made his natural affections take charge. He made no mention of the past. His hug and kiss said it all.
Only the day before, Jacob had prayed, “Please deliver me from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau, for I fear him, that he may come and attack me, the mothers with the children.” And here was the direct answer to his prayer. God had changed Esau’s heart.
The first words from Esau’s mouth were a question.
And when Esau lifted up his eyes and saw the women and children, he said, “Who are these with you?” Jacob said, “The children whom God has graciously given your servant.”
Then the servants drew near, they and their children, and bowed down.
Leah likewise and her children drew near and bowed down. And last Joseph and Rachel drew near, and they bowed down.
Jacob presented his wives in ascending order of their social status and affection. First Bilhah and Zilpah and their four boys bowed to the ground. Then Leah and her seven did likewise. And lastly Rachel with her baby. Significantly, Jacob saw this as the work of God and his grace, “the children whom God has graciously given your servant.”
Esau had now been introduced to Israel and the genesis of the chosen people.
Esau’s second question paved the way for reconciliation.
Esau said, “What do you mean by all this company that I met?” Jacob answered, “To find favor in the sight of my lord.”
But Esau said, “I have enough, my brother; keep what you have for yourself.”
Jacob said, “No, please, if I have found favor in your sight, then accept my present from my hand. For I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of God, and you have accepted me.
Please accept my blessing that is brought to you, because God has dealt graciously with me, and because I have enough.” Thus he urged him, and he took it.
Jacob’s statement to Esau, “For I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of God, and you have accepted me” indicates Jacob’s awareness that seeing God’s face at Peniel and seeing Esau’s face here were connected.
From the onset Jacob had feared Esau’s face. That is why he initially sent more than five hundred and fifty animals ahead in five droves with the announcement that he would bring up the rear.
“For he thought, ‘I may appease him with the present that goes ahead of me, and afterward I shall see his face. Perhaps he will accept me,’”
But as God planned it, Jacob had to see God’s face before that of Esau.
At the end of Jacob’s night-long struggle in the dusky dawn, he’d had a glimpse of his divine assailant as he received the blessing.
“So Jacob called the name of the place Peniel, saying, ‘For I have seen God face to face, and yet my life has been delivered.’”
Now facing Esau, Jacob declared to Esau:
“For I have seen your face, which is like seeing the face of God, and you have accepted me”
Jacob had seen the face of God and lived. And then he saw the face of Esau and lived, so that to him Esau’s face was like that of God.
And there is more. Jacob had not been ready to see Esau’s face until he had seen God’s face. The divine encounter prepared the way for the human encounter. Jacob’s reconciliation with God preceded and made possible his reconciliation with Esau. God’s crippling of Jacob preceded his reconciliation with Esau. God’s blessing upon Jacob preceded Esau’s forgiveness of Jacob.
The principle of God first, man second is written large in the language of love in the Scripture. It is in the structure of the Ten Commandments. The first four command love for God; the second six command love for humanity. That is the order. Love God, and then you can love man.
Jesus summed it up like this:
And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.
This is the great and first commandment.
And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.
Jacob’s awareness of God and his grace is all over the Genesis passage. Esau never once mentioned either grace or God directly.
But Jacob references “the children whom God has graciously given your servant” (v. 5b) and his desire “to find favor [grace] in the sight of my lord” (v. 8b) and again, “If I have found favor [grace] in your sight” (v. 10a), and finally, “God has dealt graciously with me” (v. 11).
Etiquette in patriarchal times required that Esau make a show of refusing the gift and that Jacob insist he accept it, “Thus he urged him, and he took it” (v. 11).
The fact that Esau accepted it and did not reciprocate tells us that this was not a mere exchange of civilities, but that the old score was settled. Restitution had been made in full. This was no cheap forgiveness. It cost Jacob—and he joyfully paid the price, so to speak.
Disengaging Esau
Disengaging Esau
With the restitution and reconciliation in effect, Esau’s magnanimity overflowed as he offered to lead Jacob’s clan to his home in Seir. But Seir was outside the promised land. God’s word to Jacob at Bethel was that God would bring him back to the land (cf. 28:15).
Also, God’s chosen people were to remain separate from those who were not people of faith. The dangers in Esau’s generous offer were therefore substantial.
So, Jacob gently disengaged himself from Esau, which was all good and necessary. But he was ever so “Jacob” in his demurral. He began with exaggeration.
But Jacob said to him, “My lord knows that the children are frail, and that the nursing flocks and herds are a care to me. If they are driven hard for one day, all the flocks will die.
But then he descended to deceit:
Let my lord pass on ahead of his servant, and I will lead on slowly, at the pace of the livestock that are ahead of me and at the pace of the children, until I come to my lord in Seir.”
This is something in which he had no intention of doing!
Likely, Esau sensed Jacob’s intent, and it may have been fine with him. Still, Jacob’s lie contradicted his stunning experience and affirmations of the previous day. He was both Jacob and Israel. Israel would have spoken the truth in love. Jacob rationalized that, well, one day he might go to Seir.
The upshot was that Esau left that very day for Seir. Esau and his four hundred marched off the pages of recorded history. Esau would make a brief appearance for Isaac’s funeral (35:29) and in his genealogies (chap. 36), but that is all. But to our surprise Jacob, now rid of Esau, did not make the short trip to cross the Jordan into the promised land and up to Bethel, because we read,
But Jacob journeyed to Succoth, and built himself a house and made booths for his livestock. Therefore the name of the place is called Succoth.
Succoth was north back across the Jabbok and a step back spiritually. It is hard to reckon Jacob’s sojourn to Succoth with God’s clear call to Bethel. Succoth mean “stalls” or “booths,” and therefore it may be that he built booths to husband his flocks and utilize the fertile valley lands to replenish what he had given to Esau before entering the promised land. Jacob was not transparent by any estimation.
But his stay in Succoth suggests he was still a man who did things his own way. For this, Jacob and his family were going to pay dearly.
Jacob Enters Canaan
Jacob Enters Canaan
Though crossing the Jordan over to Shechem was an historic event, the account records no fanfare. This may be because it represented only halfway obedience—he didn’t go to Bethel as God had directed. All we have are the bare facts.
And Jacob came safely to the city of Shechem, which is in the land of Canaan, on his way from Paddan-aram, and he camped before the city.
And from the sons of Hamor, Shechem’s father, he bought for a hundred pieces of money the piece of land on which he had pitched his tent.
There he erected an altar and called it El-Elohe-Israel.
This was halfway, incomplete obedience.
Yet at the same time, Jacob’s purchase of land paralleled Abraham’s purchase of land in Machpelah and Abraham’s faith in God’s promise that his descendants would inherit the land. So, we have in Jacob faith mixed with partial obedience.
Also, Jacob built an altar in Shechem and gave it a magnificent name, El-Elohe-Israel, which means “the mighty God is the God of Israel.” God had done mighty things for him over the course of his life. The altar celebrated that this mighty God was his God. But the altar should have been built in Bethel. Bethel is where he should have declared that this God was his God!
Why the halfway obedience?
What was Jacob doing settling down at Shechem and raising an altar when he should have been continuing on to Bethel to raise the altar there, where he first had the dream? Did Jacob think that Shechem was a better site for trade and for his flocks? Maybe he thought it didn’t matter. After all, Bethel was now a mere twenty miles or so away; he could go there whenever it suited him, once he got settled.
Shechem or Bethel—it’s really all the same, isn’t it? No, it’s not.
Whatever his motivation, Jacob’s compromise and his failure to follow through with complete obedience to what he had vowed would cost him and his family dearly, as we’ll see in the following chapter. Almost obedience is never enough. Being in the right ballpark may be enough when watching a baseball game, but isn’t nearly enough when it comes to obeying God. Nothing short of full obedience is required.
In tragic hindsight, Jacob would come to see that his self-willed decision to settle in Shechem would result in the rape of his only daughter and the genocidal spree of his sons, resulting in Jacob and his family becoming a stench in the land.
We all understand the foolishness of halfway obedience from our life experiences. As both parents and children, we know that when a son is asked to take out the trash, his leaving it by the back door instead of in the trash barrel is unacceptable. In fact, it is disobedience because partial obedience is always disobedience. We also know that partial obedience can be dangerous, as, for example, when a child who is told not to play in the street plays in the road. We insist on total obedience.
It’s always a delusion to imagine that we have obeyed when we have partially obeyed. And this is eternally true when dealing with God.
If God has called you to leave a relationship or a plan or a pursuit or a habit, do not imagine that you have obeyed by partial disengagement. Also, understand that if God has called you to a specific obedience, anything less than what he has directed is disobedience. Partial obedience is always disobedience, no matter what our rationalizations are. God will not be fooled or mocked.
Self-sufficient Jacob had been brought to the end of himself that night at Peniel when as he wrestled with God, he became more and more aware of his helpless, hopeless state. Certainly, he had become little more than a clinging, weeping cripple.
Paradoxically, Jacob’s prevailing with God had come through his growing weakness, as J. I. Packer explains:
“The nature of Jacob’s ‘prevailing’ with God was simply that he held on to God while God weakened him, and wrought in him the spirit of submission and self-distrust; that he had desired God’s blessing so much that he clung to God through all this painful humbling, till he came low enough for God to raise him up by speaking peace to him and assuring him that he need not fear.”
And as the narrative makes so clear in Jacob’s encounter with Esau, it was in this God-induced, weakened, dependent state that Jacob prevailed with Esau. Truly God did it all—so that unbelieving Esau left his four hundred men, sprinted to Jacob, and forgave Jacob’s sins.
Esau’s face was like the face of God not only because he forgave Jacob, but because Jacob could see God’s face in achieving his deliverance. In addition, Jacob’s reconciliation with God put him in the way of reconciliation with Esau.
Jacob’s new crippling and new name were the keys to a life of true power with man and with God. But almost immediately Jacob began to retreat from his humility and dependence. He lied to his godless, bighearted brother. He stayed in Succoth instead of entering the promised land. And then when he did enter, he continued in partial obedience.
Jacob’s altar in Shechem declared that the mighty God was his God—and he was right. But he built it in the wrong place, testifying that his knee was not bent to El-Elohe-Israel.
As we’ll see, Jacob would later go to Bethel humiliated and humbled. God’s relentless, tenacious, intrusive grace would have its fearsome, loving way. But how much better it would have been if Jacob had gone in the glory of his new name and new crippling, in the power of his weakness.
The New Testament says it this way:
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Let us remember that the crippled Jacob was the man who fought with God and prevailed. It’s the strong who always lose. But in weakness there is victory.