A needle of faith in a haystack of doubt

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Blog: learning to grow a strong faith despite internal tensions of doubt and questioning of belief

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I was recently struck by a comment in James Smith’s book, “How (Not) to be Secular”, in which he reflects on the work of Charles Taylor. There, he says that in today’s secular society “we don’t believe instead of doubting; we believe while doubting” (Smith, 2014, p. 4). It grabbed my attention because I’ve always seen doubt and belief being opposed to each other, unable to co-exist. But what is being suggested here is a state of faith that not only accepts that doubts will occur, but which places doubt as an ongoing companion of faith. So, I thought I’d reflect some more on this, explore the dynamic link between faith and doubt in the Bible and consider how faith can be nurtured in an atmosphere where Christian belief is continually challenged.....

Faith that is questioned

Smith unpacks the statement “we believe while doubting” by explaining that, in today’s society, we are continually bombarded with a stream of information and experiences that challenge our current beliefs. Let me give you a personal example: I was talking to an Imam I know and asked him what his experience of prayer was like. Honestly, but naively, I expected him to talk about his religious duty and that prayer was simply words he spoke to comply with Islamic requirements. Instead, I was inwardly shocked when he said “when I close my eyes… I see my Lord” (his exact words), and he went on to tell me how his prayer-life helped him. The experience of this conversation challenged the deeply held classic Pentecostal belief that I had been taught: the only way to have a positive spiritual experience was through faith in Jesus. But now I had heard first-hand testimony that Muslims have genuine spiritual experiences of their Lord (and I’m not making any comment here about who that might be), which they see as hugely beneficial. My belief that Christianity is the only means of having a meaningful spiritual life is called into question. And because I cannot un-hear the Imam’s words, I must continue to live with that question.
Perhaps many Christians won’t have the opportunity for those sorts of conversations, but the messages of society still bump up against faith. There are the multiple religious options available, which prompt the question “how can I be sure that Christianity is better than all the others?” There are the consumerist slogans that challenge the view that contentment can be gained without wealth. The ethical messages, which emphasise a person’s freedom to choose their own moral boundaries, cause us to assess whether our adherence to Biblical morality results in us missing out more than we gain. The questions mount up: How can I believe Jesus is the only way? How can I judge the behaviour of others according to my own ethics? How can I dismiss consumerism? These are genuine questions, to which I can find no logical compelling answer. If I choose to address these questions rationally, then I cannot conclude that Christianity is better than Islam, or Christian morality is better than secular morality. And so, I live with the questions.
However, Smith goes on to explain that none of this means that faith is impossible in the atmosphere of doubt, or that faith is in any way reduced because of the questions. It is just that it is different: faith, in today’s culture is not about being confident we have the answers to the questions and doubts we experience, rather it is about confidence despite the questions we have and the doubts we experience.
There will perhaps be Christians who have somehow avoided this questioning of faith that is a consequence of simply living as believers in the 21st century, or those who have been on the journey so long that they no longer face the tension of such doubts. However, as Jeff Vanderstelt points out, dealing with doubt is often a life-time process for today’s disciples of Jesus. (Vanderstelt, 2015, p. 85) So, let me encourage / challenge you at this point: if you’re getting hung up about doubts or questions of faith, get over it! Join the club. Today, we are all in that same boat. No longer can we expect ourselves, or others, to be completely settled in their minds that the Jesus-way is better than every other way, when our Christian faith is challenged so continually. Of course, we do continue to believe that Jesus is the only true way the Father (John 14:6) - absolute faith is still possible and should be sought - but wisdom acknowledges that we all experience continual internal questioning of the gospel we hold to be absolutely true.

The co-existence of faith and doubt (but not unbelief)

The fundamental questions that arose for me, when reflecting on believing “while doubting”, are: ‘Doesn’t the Bible condemn doubt? Doesn’t Jesus lambaste the disciples for entertaining questions of His authority and power?’ Well....
Nowhere in the New Testament are people condemned for doubting, or “wavering” (the usual Greek word for doubt διακρίνω [diakrino] means to “waver”). It is shown to be a barrier to answered prayer (for example Matthew 21:21); we will not receive what we ask for if we are not completely settled in our certainty that God will give what we request, having a ‘will he, won’t he’ mind set. (James 1:6-8) But we are not ‘written off’ because of doubts. In fact, Jude encourages us to “have mercy on those who doubt” (Jude 22), calling the church to be kind to those who struggle with these questions of faith. Why? Because wavering (or doubt) can only happen between two opposed points. Just as a pendulum wavers between left and right, so doubt wavers between certainty and questioning. In this way, it is not actually possible to doubt without believing something, as there would be nothing to move backwards and forwards to and from. Therefore, ability to doubt, or waver between two points, actually shows we have a level of faith!
However, unbelief is different. This is where we become fixed on the challenges to our faith, and there is no longer any movement or wavering between the positions of questioning and trust. The Greek word for unbelief (ἀπιστίαν - apistian), really means "to refuse to put one’s trust or reliance in something or someone” (Louw and Nida, 1996, p. 377). This is about a deliberate choice. Thomas made that choice when he said “Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.” (John 20:25) There was no wavering, no doubting, just an outright state of disbelief. Jesus links this same attitude with having “hardness of heart” in Mark 16:14, which refers to an immovable attitude. It is this unbelief that the Bible clearly speaks against, which will lead to a life and eternity outside of the presence of God. Those who choose to focus solely on questioning of faith, who have no space at all for the Lordship of Jesus; they are disbelieving, not doubting.
In looking at all this, I was surprised to come to this conclusion: The Bible teaches that faith cannot co-exist with unbelief, but a level of faith must be present for doubts to arise in the first place.

A mustard seed of faith

Perhaps Jesus had some of this in mind when he talked about faith being like a mustard seed: “The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!” And the Lord said, “If you had faith like a grain of mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you.” (Luke 17:5-6) When thinking about this, I had an image of a mustard seed being placed into a bag of other seeds. I then reasoned that if the mustard seed is “the smallest of all the seeds on earth” (Mark 4:31), then it would be extremely difficult to find! (A bit like a needle in a haystack.) If we use an analogy of seeds being the thoughts or questions that arise in our mind concerning Christianity, then faith can easily become one small voice that is difficult to discern among all the competing messages of other religions and secular culture that shout within us.
Yet that quiet whisper, somewhere inside, is enough to make a huge difference. This is what Herbert L Swartz says is the “paradoxical power of faith”. It can be tiny yet powerful. So much so that having a small amount of “trust in Jesus… open[s] the door for radical change.” (Swartz, 1996, p. 238) The faintest voice of trust in a sea of questions is enough to bring about amazing transformation in your life and the lives of others.
As a side point, the word for “smallest” in Mark 4:31 is what is called a “comparative” (Ryrie, 1999, p. 113). Jesus isn’t saying that faith must be the smallest seed, but that it is often smaller than other seeds. I think this thought is particularly apt for those of us who, at times, compare the size of our faith to the size of someone else’s. They seem to have big, bold faith. We seem to have teeny, weeny faith. Whatever size you perceive your faith to be, it is as powerful, as life changing as anyone else’s!

Growing your seed of faith

A well-used phrase, appropriate here is: what you choose to focus on will grow. As I’ve said, there will be multiple voices in us which challenge our belief in Jesus, as well as the small voice of faith the inspires trust in Jesus. We will always carry that tension in the world in which we live. Yet, the mustard seed of faith is designed to grow - seeds are made to germinate and develop into fruitful plants. Therefore, the faith-voice is made to get bigger and bigger and bigger. How does that happen? Through focusing on the voice of faith rather than the voice of the questions.
I think too many people try to resolve the tensions of faith by focusing on finding an answer to their questions of doubts. I mentioned earlier that those questions are unanswerable with logic: I cannot rationally and completely prove to myself, let alone anyone else, why faith in Jesus is the only way to the Father (John 14:6). So, whilst there is the need to engage with those questions (we need strong apologetics so we do not develop a faith devoid of all reasoning), the tension is better resolved by focusing on the voice of faith rather than the voice of reason. This causes faith to grow naturally and increases our confidence that things we cannot see or explain rationally are real (Hebrews 11:1). That will not stop the doubts, but it will produce a certainty that is stronger than the questions that challenge our faith.
How do we focus on faith in the midst of all the questions? The classic Christian practices of prayer, Bible meditation and fellowship are key. Regular engagement in these practices shifts our focus from our own understanding (Proverbs 3:5) and places it firmly on the Word of God. As we listen to that Word faith grows (Romans 10:17).
However, it is important to remember that faith and its impact on life, like a mustard seed, starts very small. Leonhard Goppelt makes this observation when reflecting on the ‘mustard seed of the Kingdom of God’: “Jesus’ preaching and teaching won over only a few, and those following in discipleship also failed repeatedly. How can one call this gospel, proclamation of the universal reign of God?” (Goppelt, 1981, p. 66.) He then makes the point that there is a massive difference between the initial work of Jesus and the fulfilled work. The work of Christ is now present across the world, with a third of earth’s population being called ‘Christian’ in some form or other. If Jesus experienced this mustard seed principle of growth, then surely, we will! The point: focusing on faith may initially produce very little fruit and possible much frustration - particularly if we expect our ‘faith’ to deal with all the issues of our world with immediate effect. However, it will grow into something powerful.

Drawing out faith

Recognising that faith today is surrounded by a sea of doubts in our own lives and in others should prompt an appropriate response in both our pastoral and evangelistic practices. I have often heard gospel preaching that challenges people to leave behind all their doubts and trust totally in Jesus. And, when providing guidance to people in need of sensitive pastoral support, I have been guilty of dismissing their doubts and questions as a lack of faith. However, what I’m learning is this: if I can recognise the internal conflict that is going on in them and appreciate that they will have many questions about whether Jesus is really the answer for their salvation and restoration, I place myself alongside them. This is exactly where the Holy Spirit would be - the one who is alongside (the παράκλητ / paraklayt), as he is described in John 14:26. I’m learning that is a much better place from which to call someone to commit their ways to the Lord (Psalm 37:5), than from a soap-box telling them what they should or should not believe.
From being alongside I’m learning to draw people’s attention to the voice of faith, despite all their questions. I’ve started to use language that says, ‘regardless of your doubts, if there’s a glimmer of something that God might just be there for you, then listen to that voice’. What am I doing? Well, I look at it like this: I imagine that they are experiencing a haystack full of doubts, but somewhere in there God has placed in a needle of faith - remember that faith is always a gift of God (Ephesians 2:8). If I can somehow be a magnet that draws that mustard seed of God-given faith to the surface, to help people become aware that there is a voice of faith among all the doubts, then I have done all I can do. I have made them aware of the possibility that they can trust God, that there is a nugget of faith in them which can grow and to which they can respond through repentance and submission to Jesus.
Will they still have doubts? Yes. But they will recognise the voice of faith among them all. The same is true for our own lives. Most of us live in the tension of questions that regularly cause us to waver between trust and a lack of confidence in Jesus. So, let me encourage you to be your own magnet - draw that small voice of faith to the surface. It’s there, it just seems to be quietened by the shouts of secularism and pluralism in our world - but it’s still there. And cause your tiny faith to grow a confidence in Jesus that is stronger than the mountain of questions that are perhaps whirling around your mind.
Bibliography
Leonhard Goppelt. Theology of the New Testament. Ed. Jürgen Roloff, trans. John E. Alsup, vol. 1. Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 1981.
Ryrie, Charles Caldwell. Basic Theology: A Popular Systematic Guide to Understanding Biblical Truth. Chicago, IL: Moody Press, 1999.
Swartz, Herbert L. “Faith,” in Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology, electronic ed., Baker Reference Library. Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1996.
Vanderstelt, Jeff. Saturate: Being Disciples of Jesus in the Everyday Stuff of Life. Wheaton, Il: Crossway, 2015.
Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®, copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
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