A Man Who Can Lead
Notes
Transcript
Bookmarks & Needs:
Bookmarks & Needs:
B: Titus 1:5-9
Service Intro & Announcements:
Service Intro & Announcements:
Thank Donna. Welcome everyone, both local and online, to the family gathering of Eastern Hills. We are still in this kind of “soft opening” phase, where we can’t all be together just yet, but we’re doing what we can for the moment. It seems silly for me to say that every week, but I’m going to keep on mentioning it this way because we need to remember that aren’t at “normal” yet. This is still not where we plan on being. I’m looking forward to being in the next stage, and I’m praying it’s soon.
If you’re here for the first time this morning, we’d like to connect with you so that we can pray for you, answer any questions you might have, or help meet a need if we can.
This goes for both people here physically and those visiting online. If you’re here physically this morning, you can text the keyword WELCOME to 505-339-2004, and you’ll get a text back with a link, and if you follow that link, it will ask you to fill out a contact card so we can stay connected. If you’re visiting with us online this morning, you can text the keyword LIVE to that same number 505-339-2004, and your contact card will be a little different: just your name and email address. We just want to be able to stay in contact with you and let you know as things change, and pray for you as we move through this crisis.
I have to ask everyone who is here physically this morning: Please wear your masks properly, unless you have a legitimate medical reason why you can’t. I know that they are bothersome. I learned that the mask I had on last week is not the one to sing in.. the fabric gets kinda linty over time. I know that some of you might feel like this is an infringements on your rights. I get all of that. But I need to be every clear here: we aren’t wearing masks right now in this room because the government says we have to. We are wearing masks because we care about one another. If I can be a blessing to someone by wearing a mask for an hour, that’s a small price to pay to bless someone. If I can help bring peace to someone else in this room because I wear a mask, it’s totally worth it. And on a larger scale, remember that my mask doesn’t protect me. It protects YOU from me. And yours protects ME from you. This is, of course, if one of us is carrying this virus and doesn’t know it. If I refuse to wear my mask because I don’t want to, isn’t that just me saying that I don’t care enough about you to be inconvenienced? I know that sounds harsh, but that’s the truth. I love you, so I’m going to mask up while I’m not speaking to the whole group. Thanks for your cooperation in that. If you need to take a deep breath every now and then, go for it: lift up the bottom of your mask and breathe in. It’s the breathing out that’s the problem.
We are still planning our Independence Day night, and that will be from 5 until about 9 on Saturday, July 4. We have Pop-Pop’s coming, and we’re working on possibly having a couple of food trucks here so folks can buy their dinner and we can help out a local business. Bring your safe and legal fireworks to light on the parking lot (hopefully that won’t get canceled). We’d like to ask the kids to do something special for this event: If you have a bike or a skateboard or a scooter that you ride, we’d love to have a parade of those things that night. Could you decorate them and bring them with you? We’d really appreciate it! Again, 5-9 on Independence Day, Saturday, July 4.
I know that the fact that we’re still in a holding pattern for Bible study classes is a frustration. But just because we can’t meet physically very well doesn’t mean that you can’t have solid Bible study. There are several classes meeting online during the week, and we also have a great resource that everyone (physically here and online) can use: Right Now Media. It’s like Netflix of Bible studies. There are tons of great resources on Right Now, including Bible book studies, topical studies, demographic studies (men, women, married, singles, students, children, etc.), and even really good kids’ programming. It’s free for everyone. Just use the link on the screen right now to sign up. I pray it’s a blessing for you.
PRAY
Musical Worship & Praise
Musical Worship & Praise
You Are Good
Yes I Will
Crown Him (Majesty)
Pray (Wayne)
Opening
Opening
Happy Father’s Day. Like Mother’s Day, this day can actually be rather painful for many. Some of you men have been unable to have children, though you would like to have children. Some of you have children who are no longer with us. Some of you have children that are living in rebellion and sin. The pain of these situations is a real burden that you carry. My heart goes out to each of you I have just mentioned.
Many of you have the missing of a father who has passed away, or the pain of an absent father in your life. We pray for your peace as well.
For some of you men, you aren’t at a place where you want children, and so you feel like this message will be useless for you. I pray that isn’t the case this morning.
And ladies, you might feel that today I’m going to focus a lot on the men. Admittedly, I am. I strongly believe that if the church is going to be all it can be in this world, it is going to take a movement of God stirring the hearts of believing men to rise up for the Kingdom as servants, as warriors, and as leaders. Men of commitment, men of character, and men of conviction. So I will admit to you that today, we are mostly focusing on the men in the room. But that doesn’t exclude you, or children for that matter, either.
Let’s stand and look at our focal passage for this morning, from Paul’s letter to Titus, chapter 1:
5 The reason I left you in Crete was to set right what was left undone and, as I directed you, to appoint elders in every town. 6 An elder must be blameless, the husband of one wife, with faithful children who are not accused of wildness or rebellion. 7 As an overseer of God’s household, he must be blameless, not arrogant, not hot-tempered, not an excessive drinker, not a bully, not greedy for money, 8 but hospitable, loving what is good, sensible, righteous, holy, self-controlled, 9 holding to the faithful message as taught, so that he will be able both to encourage with sound teaching and to refute those who contradict it.
PRAY (Pray for Cathy Smith)
Most of us have men in our lives that we have looked up to. Maybe it was your dad or a coach, a teacher or a boss. Maybe it was a pastor or some other male mentor in your life. Maybe it was a sports hero, or a super hero like Superman or Batman. The point is that there have been men in our lives that we looked up to and wanted to be like. I of course had many men that I looked up to in my life, not the least of which is my step-dad, Dan.
Most of you know (those online, maybe you don’t know) that I grew up spiritually in this church. Melanie introduced me to the church and to her youth pastor, R.J. Mansdoerfer. He answered my questions about faith and showed me the love of Jesus. I surrendered my life to Christ in the prayer room off the foyer in September of 1989. I was baptized in this baptistery, and started learning what it was to walk with Jesus here among the family of Eastern Hills. Along the way, I had several men in the church who walked alongside me, encouraged me, challenged me, and helped me to grow. Among those who are still with us today are Keith Treece and Tommy Donham, Ted James, and then later on Pastor Larry and Wayne Tedford, but this really is just scratching the surface of all those who invested in me.
These men were and are the types of men that Paul was referring to when he was writing our focal passage to Titus. At first blush, our focal passage this morning isn’t a passage about fatherhood or manhood. It’s about leadership. You’re right. It is about leadership.
5 The reason I left you in Crete was to set right what was left undone and, as I directed you, to appoint elders in every town.
Titus was to go through each of the towns on the island of Crete where churches had been planted and “appoint elders” in each one. The rest of this little passage gives us the qualifications of those elders. An “elder” is a man who can effectively hold a position of leadership in the church body. He is also called an “overseer” in verse 7, and in 1 Timothy 3.
Now, most men in the church are not going to be elders or overseers. So why is this what I’m preaching on for Father’s Day?
Stick with me for a moment and hopefully, I can make it clear.
We are called in Scripture to be imitators our Father God as His children.
1 Therefore, be imitators of God, as dearly loved children,
Also, we are called to follow the example that Jesus has set for us.
6 The one who says he remains in him should walk just as he walked.
When we look then at what it means to be a disciple, or a follower, of Christ, we see that to follow Christ is to be given an incredibly high mark to strive for. Logically, the apostles were the first elders of the church, as even Peter refers to himself as an elder in 1 Peter 5. Paul would include himself as an elder or overseer.
When Paul sets out this list and the list in 1 Timothy 3, he’s setting the stage for the qualifications that should be found in a man who CAN lead the church. Note that these are to be men who have these qualifications BEFORE being placed in a position of leadership. Men of the church, understand that the leaders in the church are not men who are selected and then develop the qualifications. They are men that already display the Christ-like characteristics that Paul lists here in Titus: they are men who CAN lead.
Men who CAN lead are men that we can look up to from a godly perspective. These are men who are worthy of our imitation, according to Scripture… believers who set an example for others to follow. In fact, even though I am primarily speaking to men this morning, we should ALL (men, women, students, children) strive to be the kind of believers that others would imitate, as Paul said to all in the church at Corinth:
1 Imitate me, as I also imitate Christ.
“Sure, but Paul said that about himself.” Yes, but the writer of Hebrews said this:
7 Remember your leaders who have spoken God’s word to you. As you carefully observe the outcome of their lives, imitate their faith.
If we are commanded in the Word of God to imitate those who meet these qualifications, then it is clear, men, that we are EACH called to strive toward becoming men who CAN lead, even if we are never actually placed in a formal position of leadership, because that is not the goal. So this isn’t just a passage about church leadership (although it is not LESS than that): it’s about the qualities of a man who each of us are called to be in our lives, because a man who can lead must be godly in their commitments, their character, and their convictions.
1) We must be men with godly commitments.
1) We must be men with godly commitments.
We are going to spend most of our time on this point this morning. The man who can lead must be a man who shows that they are committed in several areas. There is one area that we can already assume based on verse 5: that they are committed to the local church fellowship. Otherwise, it would make no sense for Titus to choose them as elders, now would it? If you see being committed to the church body as optional, you should not be in a position of leadership. This just makes sense. If you owned a business, would you hire someone who said in their interview that they would gladly give your company 65% of their effort on the job, or would show up whenever it was convenient, interesting, or fun? Of course not. We can safely assume that commitment to the local church family was a requirement for leading it.
But Paul goes on into verse 6 and gives three additional components of godly commitment that a man who can lead should display:
6 An elder must be blameless, the husband of one wife, with faithful children who are not accused of wildness or rebellion.
Twice in this passage, Paul tells Titus that the man who can lead “must be blameless.” This term “blameless” comes across to us as meaning morally perfect, but I’m going to tell you this: no man or woman that I have ever known is absolutely morally perfect in all things. This idea of “blamelessness” is that this is a man who is not someone who could be accused of a pattern of life that goes against the Word of God.
I like how the Holman Commentary, written by Knute Larson, deals with this question:
“…blamelessness refers not to perfection but to a pattern of life against which no charge of wrong can be brought. Such a person, having committed a sin, immediately seeks forgiveness and enacts restitution, if needed. Sinful behavior in a blameless person is recognized as an aberration, not a normalcy.”
I think that each of these two references to being “blameless” is placed intentionally by Paul for specific reasons in this passage. For this first one it’s about commitment: The man who can lead has a commitment first of all to being a disciple, following Jesus, which includes keeping very short accounts with God and with others, so that they are not open to a charge of sinfulness. And the times that the man who can lead does fail are clearly the exception, rather than the rule of his life.
Men, we are called to walk in such a way as this. This is where it starts, and it’s from this point of view of blamelessness that everything else in this passage flows. It starts with us being blameless in our commitment to Jesus. If you don’t have that, you’re going to struggle with everything else here, including commitment to the local church family, which we’ve already mentioned. That blamelessness, and in fact leadership itself, begins in the home. It is the first and foremost place where a man must be blameless and lead.
Notice that next, Paul says that the man who can lead should be, “the husband of one wife.” Literally, in Greek this is, “a one-woman-man.” I don’t want to get bogged down in this, but let me quickly say that I don’t see this as being something that precludes the NEVER married from leading. I also don’t see this as being something that precludes the widower from leading, even if he remarries later (at which point he ceases to be a widower). The remaining question here would be one of divorce, but that’s too long of a discussion for this morning, and for our purpose it actually doesn’t matter. This is because we are talking about being men who CAN lead, meaning that we have the qualities of a man who imitates the qualities of other godly men. We can pursue those qualities from this moment forward, even if we don’t live up to them now, because the point isn’t being called to lead—the point is being the type of man who CAN lead if necessary.
So a one-woman-man. This is a man who is completely committed to his wife. He can’t be accused of adultery. He’s not addicted to pornography. He actively pursues his relationship with his spouse. And he’s committed to encouraging his wife in her own spiritual walk. Paul said in Ephesians 5:
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. 27 He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. 28 In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hates his own flesh but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, 30 since we are members of his body.
The man who can lead in the church is committed to loving and nurturing his wife, just as Christ is committed to loving and nurturing His bride, the church. His commitment is a “till death do us part” commitment.
That commitment extends then to his children: “with faithful children who are not accused of wildness or rebellion.” Does this mean that if a man has no children, or children who are not believers, then they should not be allowed to lead? No. It means that the man who can lead is leading first in his home, as the proving ground for leading in the church. It means that he is committed to leading his children, and that the culture of his home is one that would not give rise to his children being open to accusations of being “wild and rebellious,” without his loving discipline and correction. Again, the man who can lead would be blameless regarding his commitment in this regard, and while he cannot choose faith for his children (as we all must surrender personally and individually to Christ), he is committed to the admonition of Paul in Ephesians 6:4, so that they might be saved:
4 Fathers, don’t stir up anger in your children, but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
I have heard it said that many parents who claim to follow Christ completely neglect speaking directly to their children about Him, other than bringing them to church and encouraging them to participate. Why? Because they want to “let them choose for themselves.” This is hogwash. Here’s why: We engage in teaching our children to walk, to speak, to read, to count, to do math, to study, to ride a bike, to drive a car, etc., etc. We spend hours and hours, teaching them these things. Maybe you even coach your kids in baseball, football, soccer, basketball, hockey, golf… Why? We because want them to learn what is RIGHT and TRUE, and to absolutely NOT choose their own way in these things. Our children don’t get to make up their own colors. They don’t get to make up their own sounds for the letters of the alphabet. They don’t get to decide that 2+2=apple if they want. They don’t get to decide how a car should be driven when they learning to drive.
No, we teach them what is RIGHT and TRUE and WISE because we LOVE them and want what’s best for them. But NONE of these examples, or even bigger ones: how to manage money, how to treat those they want to pursue romantically, the evil of racism or other moral questions, for example, NONE of these are as eternally weighty as the reality of God, the truth of Christianity, the centrality of Jesus, and the hope of the Gospel.
Why on God’s green earth would we want to let them choose their own way in THAT without our input, our guidance, our knowledge, and our experience? Fathers! Mothers! Teach your children about Jesus! And if you don’t, don’t say that it’s because you’re letting them choose their own way. If Jesus is really Lord over everything, and if He really is the only way to the Father, and if we are commanded to teach our children, to bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord, then if we refuse to do that then we are disobedient, rebellious, sinful children of God at BEST, and lost, dying, unbelievers at worst.
Men, we are never going to effectively bring up children in the training and instruction of the Lord if we ourselves are not under that same training and instruction. The commitment to this begins with our own commitment to Jesus, as I said earlier. Have we surrendered our lives to Jesus, believing that He died in our place to pay the penalty for our sins, so that we might have a right relationship with God? Do we believe that He rose from the grave and that in Him alone is eternal life? Do we believe that Jesus is coming back to set the world right? Do we declare that Jesus is Lord, acknowledging that we completely belong to Him, and that He has a right to tell us how to live, and that He has given us His Spirit living within us so that we would live for Him?
It’s only in constantly applying and reapplying the truth of the Gospel to our lives that we are going to maintain godly commitments and also develop godly character.
2) We must be men with godly character.
2) We must be men with godly character.
The character of men who can lead is vitally important, because as we saw in Hebrews 13:7, those who follow are to carefully observe the outcome of leaders’ lives, and then imitate their faith. Who we are and what we do make up the content of our character.
And these things matter, especially for the generation coming behind us, spiritually speaking especially.
7 As an overseer of God’s household, he must be blameless, not arrogant, not hot-tempered, not an excessive drinker, not a bully, not greedy for money, 8 but hospitable, loving what is good, sensible, righteous, holy, self-controlled,
Paul begins this list regarding an elder or overseer’s character by stating again that this person must be “blameless.” Again, this word means to be not open to any charge of sinfulness. The first time, it was in regards to their commitment, and here, it’s in regards to their character, or their reputation. They live in such a way that their character cannot be called into question. Again, this man is not perfect, but lives humbly before God, always having his character shaped by God’s Spirit at work in his life, and as such, keeps short accounts when he does stumble.
Paul then fires off 11 qualities, 5 negative and 6 positive, that the man who can lead should display in his character. We don’t have time this morning to give these all full consideration, but very quickly, the man who can lead must not be:
Arrogant: full of himself and his accomplishments, always putting himself first.
Hot-tempered: easily provoked to anger, irritable, one with a short fuse.
An excessive drinker: a drunkard, a man who risks his character by allowing it to be controlled not by the Spirit of God but the spirits in the bottle.
A bully: a person who uses threatening language or physical posturing, or even threats, to get their way, someone who is verbally or physically abusive and hurtful.
Greedy for money: motivated to lead primarily because of the financial payoff, not because of the love for Jesus or the church.
Then he gives 6 positive character traits of the man who can lead. This man must be:
Hospitable: this refers to the showing of care for strangers. While our modern definition of hospitality is having people in your home for entertainment or fun, the idea in the first century would have been that the man who can lead should be ready and willing to help people he doesn’t know, even to the level of sacrificing his own comfort or provision to do so.
A lover of good: a man who focuses on and is shaped by that which is defined as good by God. Consider, for example, this list that Paul gave to the church at Philippi:
8 Finally brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable—if there is any moral excellence and if there is anything praiseworthy—dwell on these things.
Sensible: a sober-minded and prudent man who has an accurate and balanced view of life. He acts with wisdom and common sense, so he is not rash or foolish.
Righteous: just and upright, a man who lives in accordance with God’s standards.
Holy: pure and set apart for God, a man who pursues a life untainted by moral pollution or stain.
Self-controlled: having mastery over his passions and impulses, bringing his will under the control of God. Danny Akin said it this way: A man who “monitors himself day in and day out, submitting his life to the x-ray vision and CAT-scan detail of God’s perfect Word.”
I know that this is a tall order, gentlemen. I get it. What we must remember is that we are in a constant battle. There’s never a day off, never a moment to give ground if we are going to be the kind of man who can lead. Our character is critical, and it flows from our convictions:
3) We must be men with godly convictions.
3) We must be men with godly convictions.
I think that this is where most of us fail. It’s in the area of convictions that we are not the kind of men who can lead. We live in a time and in a culture where godly conviction is frowned upon. It can be a struggle to stand on the Word of God. It’s going to be difficult to maintain godly character if we’re constantly listening to messages that tell us not to. It’s going to be hard to maintain godly commitments to our Lord, our church, our wives, and our children if we are struggling to be fully convinced ourselves.
But this is where the rubber really meets the road. What do we believe? What are we convinced of?
9 holding to the faithful message as taught, so that he will be able both to encourage with sound teaching and to refute those who contradict it.
The man who can lead “holds” to the faithful message of the Gospel as they received it. He holds on to Jesus, even in the middle of a crazy storm like a pandemic and societal unrest.
The man who can lead says, “It doesn’t matter what society says: I will trust the Word of God.” “It doesn’t matter what my feelings say: I will trust the Word of God.” “It doesn’t matter what my friends or my enemies or all of the people on social media say: I will trust the Word of God.”
And not only will he trust the Word of God, the man who can lead will study the Word of God, so that he’s ready and able to talk about the Word of God correctly. He’s ready and able to point out where people are handling the Word of God incorrectly. I’m not saying that the man who can lead has to have a seminary degree or anything of the sort: but he loves and uses the Word of God virtually every day of his life, and his convictions come from the Word.
Closing
Closing
Gentlemen, even if God doesn’t give you a position of direct leadership in the church, you should strive to be the kind of man who CAN lead. You should submit yourself first of all to Jesus Christ, and then to developing godliness in your commitments, in your character, and in your convictions. Some of this will take repentance. You might need to completely turn away from some things that are holding you back from growing in godliness in these areas. You might need to confess to someone that you’ve wronged. You might need to change what messages you are listening to every day. I’m not saying this is going to be easy, but if we’re going to take the Word of God seriously, we need to each be striving to be the kind of may who can lead.
That starts, as I said, with a surrender. Giving up our rights to ourselves, and surrendering to Jesus as Lord and as Savior, and living for Jesus from that moment forward, trusting in Him alone to save us. You can surrender to Jesus right now where you are.
We are still not having personal contact invitation. Reach out to us on email or via that text in church number I gave earlier if you are making a decision this morning and would like to share it so we can encourage you and pray for you.
PRAY
Donna’s song (4 minutes)
Ending Instructions
Ending Instructions
We have a very loving fellowship here, and I greatly appreciate that. We love to talk and hang out and catch up and laugh together. However, one thing that happened last week is that we did all of this in the building, while our cleaning crew is waiting to disinfect the sanctuary for us. So this morning, we will be dismissed row by row, starting with the back rows, by safety and security. If you want to hang out and talk, that’s great! Just do so out in the courtyard or under the awning.
Follow their instructions as we leave. If you’re in the north parking lot, feel free to just go straight out there. God bless you all, and have a fantastic week!