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As we’re all well aware, COVID-19 has created a lot of disruption to every day life for people across the world. Work, social, and hobbies have been suspended. But one space of our lives, especially as children of GOD, that should not be disrupted or corrupted by the impacts of this pandemic, is our family character itself. That meaning the behavior in our homes should reflect who we are in Christ regardless of the challenging circumstances that surround us. Thus my aim in this message is to inform and remind others of the picture of a grace-filled family in the midst of COVID-19.
It is very interesting that Peter encourages the household while these Christians were experiencing troubling circumstances. But I realized that the family is the foundation of support. Particularly the relationship between husband and wife, because how they operate informs children and sometimes even extended family how to weather storms of life. Now Peter first addresses women, or contextually wives. Yet it also has application for those desiring a man or near marriage. His first instruction is that women be submissive to their own man. Now this word has gained a lot of negativity over the years, mainly because of how many have abused it and not considered scriptural context nor GOD’s intentions. And it has driven a movement in women to gain equality. Well when we come back GOD’s intention, we understand that submission is a good and rewarding role. Peter has already said all should submit to the ruling authorities and their bosses, for it is the will or purpose of GOD! More than that, Jesus, whose followers we are supposed to be, submitted to the will of his Father. Not only that, consider how many peoples requests he submitted to! Thus, submission is a pattern of Jesus himself. It is about placing oneself within the order of GOD. So in regards to the family and home, wives are to voluntarily yield to their husbands. Watch the purpose: So in cases where the husband hasn’t obeyed the gospel or is a believer but not persuaded by some part of GOD’s word, the behavior of the wife is intended to impact the husband in a way to transform his convictions about GOD!Wow! That’s powerful.
Application: See this epidemic has kept us home more than often and women face the faults and flaws of their husbands daily. Peter isn’t telling you not to communicate to your husband, he’s telling you to change your method. According to a number of sources, 65% of the population are visual learners, and I believe many men fall into that category!!! I’m sure many women have said that he doesn’t or hasn’t listened, won’t come to church, etc. Well if he isn’t listening to GOD’s word audibly, the Holy Spirit through Peter is saying there’s a greater effectiveness to showing him through your flawless behavior how much GOD’s grace has impacted your life. He don’t deserve it!! He may not. But that’s the whole point of grace!!! Granting someone what they don’t deserve!! So your submissive role is a matter of GOD’s order for the family, and it can have a transformative effect on your husband.
Peter recognized the tendency of women to use their outward adornment or cosmetics for all sorts of purposes. One of them would be to influence men. That methodology has existed for centuries. But the encouragement is that the focus of beauty should not solely be external. One reason is supported from Proverbs 31 and that’s that beauty is fleeting. It won’t last forever. So Peter says instead the focus should be on beauty that can’t be destroyed, beauty of the inner person. That being a cool, calm, and collected spirit, which looks real good to GOD.
Application: There are many worldly pressures on women of how to look and act. I hate that humanity has created so much pressure for women, and/or that so many women have allowed themselves to deal with it. Esp during COVID-19, many women might be stressing over a lack of certain cosmetics. There’s nothing wrong with cosmetics, and I don’t believe Peter is suggesting a divine ban on these things. In fact, the word cosmetics comes from cosmos, which is the order in which the world was furnished or equipped. And Genesis says when GOD saw it, it was good! So GOD is the author of cosmetics. Rather Peter is trying to shift the focus of beauty. The one women should be concerned with looking good for is GOD, and GOD is focused on a deeper beauty. People can say what they want all day long, but when GOD says you look good, that should far exceed what people talk about. What’s the point? Keep putting on your lingerie for your husband, if that’s what ya’ll like. But that shouldn’t be a means to convince him about GOD. Now you gotta use what’s precious to GOD. That’s having a mild and quiet spirit. Now quiet doesn’t mean mute. Notice in Acts 11:2, 18. Jews were upset and got hostile with Peter because he went into the house of gentiles, but after Peter explained everything that happened, v. 18 says they were quieted and glorified GOD. Thus quiet means non-hostile, contentious, or off the chain.
Application 2: Peter mentions Sarah and how she adorned herself and hoped in GOD. Now Sarah had external beauty. In fact, at 65 years old, Abraham himself said something about her beauty. But the Pharoah of Egypt did as well. But that’s not the beauty the Holy Spirit moved Peter to recall. It was rather her submissive character to Abraham, calling him her lord when she was in her 80’s. That beauty transcends age, no matter how external beauty has faded.
Now Peter has a word for husbands. It’s shorter content, only filling one verse, but it is of great magnitude. His first instruction is to live with our wives.
Application: In troublesome times as these, it is vital for couples to live and exist together, not apart or separated. In their culture and time it was common for a man to do away with his wife for almost any cause he felt he could justify. So live with, not without. There are all sorts of challenges on households, endure them with your wife. Not only that, but the word live also connotes marital relations. That means couples should spend time being intimate. Not only that, but these are surely opportunities to grow closer.
How should men live with their wives? In an understanding way, or according to knowledge.
Application: Of course you and I won’t know everything there is to know about women. But it is up to us to learn what we can. Understanding requires knowledge. Knowledge of our wives is gained through communication. (This again supports the fact that Peter was not saying women can’t speak) Care is a vital requisite for good communication.
Application 2: If any need a better grasp on what this means, grab a glass cup or bowl from the cabinet, and I dare you to toss it as high as you can in the air so you can catch it. That’s the idea of understanding!! Move or transport a big flat screen tv. It requires strength indeed, but it definitely needs to be under control!! Why? Because if you make the wrong move, you will drop it and shatter the glass. It’s not the same if you’re carrying a concrete block.
Application 3: Identify the most expensive and favored possession that you own. Think of how much time, energy, protection, bragging, and display we give that possession. That’s how Peter is say we should treat our women, as extremely valuable. - I’m often convicted by the thought “Does Jessyca feel that I honor her”. That should be our aim as men, to know for sure that our wives feel that we honor them. This honor is due to the fact that we are we equal and together in our hope and reception of GOD’s gift of life eternal. Even when she isn’t her best, she’s still your partner and should be shown the same grace both have received!!
Application 4: There are a lot of people I’ve cut communication with, and only few I was even slightly bothered by. But for it to be cut with GOD would be detrimental!! My needs, requests, petitions for strength, wisdom, favor, etc. Then not being guided throughout his word to find understanding in my circumstances would be tough, and I would feel lost. But if we don’t want that hindrance in communication with GOD, we must treat them right!!
Now part of the reason I selected this package is because since the stay at home order, the number of domestic violence cases has increased significantly across the world. 35% in the US according to the Intercept and NBC, and 26% in KC area according to the KC Star. That immediately tells me that people are in serious need of better understanding and appreciation for the family unit. The abused feel like there’s no escape now, and due to economic and other stresses, frustrations and anger have driven more abuse. GOD does not endorse or promote any type of abuse. Ps 11:5 teaches that GOD can’t stand those who love violence, and he hears the cry of those oppressed and abused Ps 10:17-18. GOD also expects for his children to seek justice, meaning he wants us to make sure things are right. Thus if you, or anyone you know is suffering from abuse, inform the authorities. GOD does not expect for women or children to deal with an abusive relationship.
Does your home reflect the grace GOD has shown us? In our marriages, soon to be marriages, and with our children? When times are rough, GOD’s intended order for the family unit is show each other grace, women in their submissive behavior, men in there staying together and showing honor to wives.
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