(Topical - Marriage Conference) - Flourishing Roles is a Beautiful Marriage
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· 5 viewsOften marriages are more of a power-struggle then Christ-exalting. Our natural flesh tends to be selfish and self-interested. Because a spouse is the closest person emotionally and physically to you – it is not surprising we struggle with power in our marriages. But God designed something better. A beautiful husband and wife relationship. Consider how flourishing in your role in the marriage can help make you have a beautiful marriage.
Notes
Transcript
INTRODUCTION:
Whiteboard: Write “Submission”
How does Submission make you feel? -
Ladies - How does Submission make you feel?
Men - How does a Lack of Submission make you feel?
______________________________________
What other topic is related to this issue?
Gender Roles
Marital Roles
Created Order of the Family
May I suggest -
that when we focus on the idea of submission by itself ....
we don’t really understand what is at stake in our marriages?
For women - Is the issue really about submitting or not liking God’s design?
For Men - Is the issue really about a lack of submission or about me failing to live up to God’s design?
What is really the issue?
I think when we focus on submission rather then faithfulness to our created, designed role - we miss the beauty of marriage!
Marriage is supposed to be a beautiful thing.
- Marriage was part of God’s perfect design for the World.
4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,
Mk 19:4
- Marriage is meant for companionship, a complimenting and completion of one another.
18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
- God so valued marriage that he used it to picture his relationship to his people.
God was pictured as Israel’s Husband
5 For your Maker is your husband,
the Lord of hosts is his name;
and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer,
the God of the whole earth he is called.
The church as the Bride of Christ
7 Let us rejoice and exult
and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
and his Bride has made herself ready;
8 it was granted her to clothe herself
with fine linen, bright and pure”—
for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.
9 And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.”
And let’s be honest -
Even in the depths of our lostness we realize
- two married people, who truly love each other, is beautiful.
- Whether you or old … we love seeing people who have a wonderful marriages.
Whether you or old … we love seeing people who have a wonderful marriage.
So instead of considering whether submitting,
let’s consider how our marriage is beautiful, fun, and vibrant … when we are faithful to our created roles.
What does a marriage look like when there is a struggle for power in the marriage?
Its selfish
Its divisive
Its a terrible burden
ILLUSTRATION:
I remember a friend had just gotten divorced … and he said he would never get married again.
Why?
They had fought over
money,
staying in the Navy,
what television show they watched.
He had to sleep on the couch … or worse get a hotel room.
Because a marriage with a power struggle … is anything but beautiful and fulfilling.
It’s depressing and painful.
May I say -
A marriage can only be satisfying and beautiful when we are willing to faithfully fulfill our created roles in marriage.
To say it another way -
Life is to be too hard to this alone, so you and your spouse have learn to be a team players playing on the same team.
Personalize it:
More then once My wife and I have looked at each other and said,
we have to be a team because what we are facing is to hard to do alone.
That has to be in your marriage.
So what are those roles?
Husband and Wife.
Its selfish
Its divisive
The Husband -
Its a terrible burden
Leader - He is tasked with the responsibility to lead the home. (, )
Lover - He is especially to follow, live-out, and model the love of Christ. (, )
The most noteworthy model of this in Scripture is .
Many struggles in marriage are resolved when a Husband serves like Christ.
The Beauty of a marriage flourishes when a Husband serves likes Christ.
George Sciopine (The Sword and the Shovel) defines it this way:
His Model: Jesus Christ.
His Method: Self Sacrificial love.
His Means: Example and Exhortation.
The Wife -
A Suitable Helper - She desires to compliment him and be his helper. (, , )
Many struggles in marriage are resolved when a wife seeks to help her husband, trusting his leadership is guided and directed by God.
The Beauty of a marriage flourishes when a wife seeks to help her husband, trusting his leadership is guided and directed by God.
George Sciopine (The Sword and the Shovel) defines it this way:
Her Model: The Church.
Her Method: Submission to Her Husbands Authority as His Helper.
Her Means: Godly Character.
The most noteworthy model of this in Scripture: .
CONCLUSION:
As we conclude today,
I realize I have not given you an exhaustive understanding of a beautiful marriage.
I realize I probably have not even given you something you have never thought about before.
So my goal this mornings … is not to exhaustively teach,
but to lovingly point you in the right direction.
To perhaps rekindle a husband-wife relationship that is comparable to the Christ-Church relationship.
ILLUSTRATION:
I sometimes think of marriage like a flower.
No one wants an ugly, wilted flower.
What is going to cause it die?
When your marriage is craving -
a selfish me-first attitude.
it is controlled by a crazy cycle of power struggle.
You can count on your beautiful marriage wilting.
On the other hand,
What is going to make your flower flourish?
When the husband seeks to love like Christ,
and the wife submits as a help-meet
Your working together,
pointing each other to Christ,
will cause your marriage to be beautiful
I realize we have various
ages
and stages in life
But regardless of that …
all of our marriages will either wilt or flourish.
> They can either die because
we are in a power struggle with what I can get out of it,
> Or they can flourish because
we are striving to faithfully fulfill God’s design .
EXHORTATION:
From an application standpoint -
We can think of people’s marriages falling apart … and that part of the root cause is the neglect of God’s created design in marriage.
And that is to bad.
And obviously I want to save as many of those as I can.
But I also can think of people’s marriages who are not falling apart … but they are not blossoming either.
They are two people who share common living spaces and finances,
but they lack the spark of two people who deeply love each other.
I don’t simply want marriages that are not falling apart …
I want marriages that oosing with love and care for each other.
One that glorifies Christ.
One that makes others ask - How do I get a marriage like that?
I want us to have beautiful marriages.
So I challenge to consider -
How is my marriage a power struggle?
And how instead can I be a faithful, God-honoring spouse?