The Arrival of Love

When the Lord saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren. And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben, for she said, “Because the Lord has looked upon my affliction; for now my husband will love me.” She conceived again and bore a son, and said, “Because the Lord has heard that I am hated, he has given me this son also.” And she called his name Simeon. Again she conceived and bore a son, and said, “Now this time my husband will be attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” Therefore his name was called Levi. And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, “This time I will praise the Lord.” Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she ceased bearing. When Rachel saw that she bore Jacob no children, she envied her sister. She said to Jacob, “Give me children, or I shall die!” Jacob’s anger was kindled against Rachel, and he said, “Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruit of the womb?” Then she said, “Here is my servant Bilhah; go in to her, so that she may give birth on my behalf, that even I may have children through her.” So she gave him her servant Bilhah as a wife, and Jacob went in to her. And Bilhah conceived and bore Jacob a son. Then Rachel said, “God has judged me, and has also heard my voice and given me a son.” Therefore she called his name Dan. Rachel’s servant Bilhah conceived again and bore Jacob a second son. Then Rachel said, “With mighty wrestlings I have wrestled with my sister and have prevailed.” So she called his name Naphtali. When Leah saw that she had ceased bearing children, she took her servant Zilpah and gave her to Jacob as a wife. Then Leah’s servant Zilpah bore Jacob a son. And Leah said, “Good fortune has come!” so she called his name Gad. Leah’s servant Zilpah bore Jacob a second son. And Leah said, “Happy am I! For women have called me happy.” So she called his name Asher. In the days of wheat harvest Reuben went and found mandrakes in the field and brought them to his mother Leah. Then Rachel said to Leah, “Please give me some of your son’s mandrakes.” But she said to her, “Is it a small matter that you have taken away my husband? Would you take away my son’s mandrakes also?” Rachel said, “Then he may lie with you tonight in exchange for your son’s mandrakes.” When Jacob came from the field in the evening, Leah went out to meet him and said, “You must come in to me, for I have hired you with my son’s mandrakes.” So he lay with her that night. And God listened to Leah, and she conceived and bore Jacob a fifth son. Leah said, “God has given me my wages because I gave my servant to my husband.” So she called his name Issachar. And Leah conceived again, and she bore Jacob a sixth son. Then Leah said, “God has endowed me with a good endowment; now my husband will honor me, because I have borne him six sons.” So she called his name Zebulun. Afterward she bore a daughter and called her name Dinah. Then God remembered Rachel, and God listened to her and opened her womb. She conceived and bore a son and said, “God has taken away my reproach.” And she called his name Joseph, saying, “May the Lord add to me another son!”

We are in our ADVENT series called “Arrival” and our vision for this series is to: Find the blessing in waiting on the arrival of Jesus Christ.

We’ve been studying how God had promised an offspring who would crush the head of the serpent who deceived Eve in the garden...

But mankind had to wait a LONG time for that specific offspring… the Savior of the world...

And before he would come, we see many more offspring through whom God is preserving and protecting his promise…

And we’ve been looking at times when that promise seemed to be threatened by long seasons of waiting on behalf of the woman…

We looked at Eve and her son Seth… Sarah and her son Isaac… today we will look at Leah and Rachel… and 12 sons between the two of them…

They all were made to WAIT in faith… looking for the offspring whom God said would come.

And as we study how these women and their sons fit into God’s bigger story of salvation through Jesus, we are learning in this Advent season that God has designed his blessings to come THROUGH waiting...

Advent teaches us that the blessings of God don’t just come when the waiting is completely over...

But that Jesus enters INTO our waiting as Emmanuel (God with us)...

Advent is all about learning to wait for the second coming of Jesus Christ even as we wait for the celebration of his first coming.

What we are WAITING for is the same son of God who arrived as Emmanuel 2000 years ago... to ARRIVE AGAIN… fully and finally in all of his glory.

And as we wait… his presence with us brings hope and peace and joy and love.

So far we have looked at those first three blessings: hope… peace… and joy… and this week’s blessing (as you might have guessed)… is LOVE.

The Title of Today’s sermon is “The Arrival of Love.”

I was just following the pattern of the way I’ve titled all the sermons in this series…

The Title of Today’s message is “The Arrival of Love.” Which you have to admit… sort of sounds like the title of a Hallmark Christmas movie, doesn’t it? You can just imagine the plot…

but when I got to the title of this sermon… I realized it sort of sounds like the title of a Hallmark Christmas movie, doesn’t it? You can just imagine the plot of a Hallmark Christmas movie called “The Arrival of Love”…

Which THEN made me think of this guy that made me laugh so hard last year… [Play video]

she is rushing around looking for her keys when her doorbell rings… it was her Amazon delivery man with the ARRIVAL of the Christmas gift she had bought for her dying father… the package is two days late...

WE can all see that the delivery man is strikingly handsome and kind, and we learn from his name badge that his name is Jake… but Claire has no time for romance…

She has a pile of work to do… and she has to fit in a Christmas visit to her family… she hasn’t made a visit home in too long…

They exchanged numbers but she had to leave for her small town family Christmas in New Jersey.

So she rudely brushes past the delivery man on her way out the door, talking feverishly to her boss on her cell phone, assuring him she will only be gone one night.

[As video is loading] Too often THIS is what we think of when we think of “The Arrival of Love” at Christmas…

As she leaves the big city in her Uber, she enters her small town which looks exactly like she left it 20 years ago… a Christmas wonderland!

She’s getting out of the uber to walk into a diner when she bumps into someone…

It’s the SAME ruggedly handsome Amazon delivery man…

And now she recognizes him… it was the boy who sat across the room in their High School Chemistry class and annoyed her to death...

But he kindly helps her pick up her things… and to all of us watching, this is CLEARLY the ARRIVAL OF LOVE...

But Claire still can’t see it… she’s still consumed with her own world…

she finds out his name is Jake, and they discover they are looking for the same person: her father.

She does learn his name is Jake… and she has to get to her father’s house.

Well it just so happens that Jake ALSO has a handyman business on the side… and he is going over to her dad’s house NEXT to do some work for him… he gives her a lift…

As the movie unfolds, they get to know each other… have a snowball fight… ride on horseback… decorate a Christmas tree… and they are almost about to kiss… when she gets a phone call…

They get to know each other… have a snowball fight… ride on horseback… decorate a Christmas tree… and they are almost about to kiss… when she gets a phone call… it’s her boss at the toy company demanding she come back right away or else their stocks will plummet by close of trade on Christmas eve...

it’s her boss at the toy company demanding she come back right away because there is a major distribution problem and it’s Christmas eve...

She leaves… the Amazon driver/handyman Jake is so disappointed…

And the scene cuts to her in her office questioning all of her life’s decisions...

And then… in a moment of clarity and confidence… she runs out… drives home in a snowstorm...

…enters her parents home where Jake the handyman is finishing putting up the Christmas lights… they kiss… with the closing line with her narrating as the camera pans out: “I didn’t know that the arrival of my amazon package would also mean the arrival of love.”

And her and the handyman kiss… with the closing line with her narrating as the camera pans out: “I didn’t know that the arrival of my amazon package would also mean the arrival of love.”

End scene… Roll credits.

Hallmark Christmas movies are what a lot of people think love OUGHT to look like… they are what we WISH love looked like...

Because especially around Christmas time, so many people think that is what true love ought to look like.

Picture-perfect family moments…

Finding the person who is “just the right one”… the person who will satisfy all our dreams.

Getting that warm fuzzy feeling going… Just listen to the holiday songs that are all over the radio right now… that’s the perception of how love SHOULD arrive at Christmas…

Just listen to the holiday songs that are all over the radio right now...

And I believe what fuels the popularity of these movies and songs is actually that they provide an escape from a reality that looks very different from a Hallmark movie.

You see, back in the real world, we KNOW that love stories are not so picture-perfect...

The people we love let us down...

The people we are in relationship with have deeply embedded character flaws that are not solved in an hour and a half...

Our family Christmas gatherings this week… for some of us… will be REALLY difficult because of differences in beliefs… or lifestyle choices… or strained relationships..

Some of you will experience that in your own marriages as you go home today… or with your own parents...

And the Arrival of Love won’t come with all the warm fuzzies and predictable happy endings of a Hallmark movie.

And yet the culture still tells us that this is what we should be looking for:

The type of love that gives us warm fuzzies…

The type of relationships that are all we ever dreamed of.

Thankfully God’s word helps us deal with the real world better than Hallmark.

The passage that we are going to read today demonstrates the painful realities of love gone wrong...

If you think YOUR family is dysfunctional… just wait til you see this one…

And as we get into God’s word today, we will see the futility of seeking satisfaction in the love of anyone but God himself.

Here’s what I believe God wants us to learn to do today:.

Big Idea: Seek the arrival of Christ's Love that removes your shame and satisfies your soul.

Intro: Hallmark Movies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aj7-73Xsb74

Big Idea: Seek the arrival of Christ's Love that removes your shame and satisfies your soul.

Your Bibles are open to .

Last week we studied about Abraham… Sarah… and Isaac… the child of laughter… the child that brought joy to his parents’ hearts as they watched God fulfill his promise.

And the story of Isaac really sets the stage for the story that we are reading today.

You see, Isaac had two twin sons… Jacob and Esau.

Jacob was the younger of the two by just a minute… he came out hanging onto the heel of his older brother...

And this would foreshadow his character as a deceiver… always trying to get out ahead of his brother…

Eventually, he would deceive his older brother and father into giving him the birthright and blessing of the family line...

And because his brother wasn’t too happy about that, he FLED to the land of Haran… that was his mom’s hometown...

There he would find his Uncle Laban and he would seek to marry his cousin… which is pretty weird, but it’s what they did back then.

And so he saw Laban’s second-oldest daughter who was named Rachel and immediately notices that she was beautiful… and so he goes and asks Laban for her hand in marriage.

Now in that day, you couldn’t just take a woman in marriage… you had to give something to her father first… and Jacob offers to work seven years for Laban…

I think it’s kind of funny, Laban’s response, “It is better that I give her to you that I should give her to any other man...”

It sounds like he’s saying, “I guess you are better than some of the other schlubs around here… let’s go for it.

So Jacob is like, “OK! I’ll get to work!!!” And it’s so romantic… tells us that those seven years “seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.”

…sounds like a Hallmark Christmas movie, doesn’t it?

But on the night of the wedding, Laban pulls the old switcheroo on Jacob… this one would be too scandalous for Hallmark...

You see, he had a harder time marrying off his older daughter Leah… and it would bring shame to the family if he allowed the younger daughter to be married first…

So in the dark of night he exchanges Leah for Rachel… Jacob consummates a marriage with Leah THINKING it is Rachel… (don’t ask me how that happens)...

And wakes up to an unpleasant surprise...

He confronts Laban and Laban makes a deal with him....

Laban says, “I’ll give you Rachel as a wife too if you work for me another seven years.” (You can see how well this is going to go)

So Jacob agrees and 29:30 says, “So Jacob went in to Rachel also, and he loved Rachel more than Leah, and served Laban for another seven years.” ()

You can see how well this is going to go)

The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2016). (). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles.

That’s the context of what we are studying today…

The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2016). (). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles.

All throughout the passage we are about to read, God is working out his purposes in the midst of some VERY VERY messed up family dynamics.

This passage is here in Genesis to explain to Israel their origins… the 11 sons described here (and one who comes along in chapter 35) are the patriarchs of the 12 tribes of Israel.

And you have to admit… this is a pretty messed up origin story.

Israel is finding out that their roots are not pure or righteous from a human perspective…

They are finding out that their nation was produced from shameful activity

If they thought that God loved them because of how great they were, they were finding out that this was categorically not the case…

Their tribes are founded by a God who loved them simply because of his loving nature… despite their shame… and he is a God who works through very unloving… unrighteous... family dynamics.

This passage we are studying today reads more like a reality TV show than a Hallmark movie… I think it would be called “Wife Wars” or “Real Housewives of Haran” or “Sister Wives” because we basically see this battle between them for the love of their husband…

And their main artillery… this is really tragic… is going their children… real human lives become the pawns in their war for their husband’s heart.

And while they are so focused on their husband and each other… there is a loving God who is blessing them with child after child after child despite their nonsense.

Isn’t that the way we can be sometimes?

“Looking for love in all the wrong places.”???

Seeking satisfaction in horizontal relationships while missing the God of true love???

As we think about “waiting for the arrival of love” this morning, we can see in this passage…

4 Ways to Miss the Love of God

Sometimes we are waiting to find love that has already been given to us… it can be easy to MISS GOD’s love… that’s what happened to Leah and Rachel.

[Read , ESV]

Here’s the first way we miss the love of God:

1) Try to earn love (29:31-35)

Explain: Notice… the Lord SEES that Leah was hated (the original Hebrew word for hated simply means that she was “unloved” or “loved less.”)

The Lord takes notice… he sees her humiliation… and is moved by compassion… he is the one behind each child she has… this is beautiful love on display.

But what hangs over Leah’s head in this section is her husband’s lack of love.

With Reuben, she sees that the Lord has looked upon her affliction… but her focus is this: “Now my husband will love me.”

With Simeon, she understands that the Lord has heard she is hated… she is focused on Jacob’s distaste for her...

With Levi, she longs that this time her husband will be attached to her…

Finally with Judah… it seems… at least for the time being… that she focuses her attention on the Lord.

Here is what Leah is consumed with: If I do the things my husband wants me to do… in that culture it was producing babies that was of great value...

If I do the things my husband wants me to do… then he will love me.

When when one wasn’t enough… maybe two… when two weren’t enough… maybe three would do the trick…

Here’s what she’s doing: she is using God’s loving provision of children toward HER to EARN her husband’s love.

And it’s causing her to miss the love of God.

Instead of rejoicing in the fact that GOD loves her COMPLETELY... in a way that she NEVER earned… in a way she could never deserve…

She is consumed with a love that she thinks she CAN earn.

And thank God she recognizes it with her fourth son, Judah, saying, “This time I will praise the Lord...”

That word, “this time,” tips us off to the fact that it wasn’t happening before...

But we are going to see in a few verses that she falls right back into this line of thinking that her worth and value as a woman is based on what she can earn… what she can produce.

And isn’t that the way that we think sometimes?

Illustration: I remember as a teenager… trying to EARN the love of my peers…

And I would do the things that I thought they would think were cool… I’d try to gain their approval…

And it might have lasted for a few moments… but it would quickly fade away…

And all the while God had set his love upon me…

he had opened my eyes to my sin and my need for a savior…

He was lovingly disciplining me for my sin and calling me back to him...

He was a constant for me in many vways...

But I was consumed with earning the love and approval of others.

Application: And maybe there is someone in your life… or a group of people… who you are consumed with earning their love.

Maybe… if you’re not married… it’s someone of the opposite gender… or just the opposite gender in general...

And you do whatever you can to get the attention and approval of that special someone… or really just anyone who will give you attention…

And so you do whatever you can to get the attention and approval of that special someone… or really just anyone who will give you attention…

And if you get it… even for a moment… it feels so good that you are willing to do whatever it takes to keep it...

I have seen so many young people over the years SETTLE for someone who is not good for them simply because they feel like they don’t DESERVE anything better...

Maybe it’s just a group of friends… and you want soooo badly for people to love you…

And you live for the approval of others...

And you think you have to perform to a certain standard if you are ever going to experience love.

Maybe it’s your parents… and they just never seem to be happy with you…

and you feel like you need to earn their love by doing exactly what you think will make them happy…

Maybe if you are married… maybe it’s your spouse…

And they’ve been hard on you over the years…

And you LONG for their love… and you try to earn their love by doing the things you think they want… but they are just never satisfied.

Maybe it’s the Lord...

Because human love is so fickle… you’ve begun to believe that you have to earn his love too…

And you think his love rises and falls based on your performance…

if you are good enough, then he loves you… if not, watch out.

We try to earn a love that can’t be bought… but is freely given.

Listen: true love… the love that only God can supply... cannot be earned.

And you will miss the love of God if you are consumed with finding a love you can earn.

Now one of the reasons we try to find a love that we can earn is because that’s a love we can control.

and then operate out of faith in his love.

If I can EARN love, then I can manipulate the world around me in such a way that I FEEL loved.

And really, the idea of “love” becomes a quest for self-fulfillment rather than simply receiving from the Lord so that I can extend love to others.

Love that is focused on yourself is not true love.

We see this quest for self fulfillment as Rachel reenters the scene. Look at 30:1

[Read ]

Here’s the second way we will miss the love of God:

2) Use love for self-fulfillment (30:1-13)

Explain: So after Leah has her fourth child, it APPEARS that she can’t have children anymore… and so what takes place next is “the battle of the barren women…”

It’s this sick competition between Rachel and Leah of thinking, “OK, if I can’t have my husband’s full love and devotion, then at least I can feel good about myself knowing that I have more children with him than my sister.”

The battle starts out with Envy… verse 1 says, "Rachel envied her sister"

Envy is thinking that I will be fulfilled if I just get what someone else has… if I get an advantage over them…

Her pursuit of children flows entirely from being jealous that her sister has children.

It’s not a holy pursuit to fulfill God’s command to be fruitful and multiply...

It’s not a God-given desire to raise up the next generation of God-fearing men and women...

It’s a selfish desire of comparing herself to others and thinking that children will be the answer to her longing soul.

Envy then moves to demands - She says to Jacob, "Give me children or I shall die."

Isn’t that where fights start in our relationships?

We have desires that we demand should be met by the other person… and that other person can’t meet our demands???

And so Jacob is like, “AM I in the place of God??? I’m not the one who made you barren…”

Wrong response, by the way.

Right facts… wrong delivery.

God HAD closed the womb of Rachel… but ultimately it was because Jacob was a terrible husband who hated his first and actual wife Leah.

The problem didn’t start between Rachel and God… the problem started with the leader of the household: Jacob.

He had been a false representation of God’s love to his wife.

That doesn’t excuse Rachel… but it does help us see that Jacob owns a lot more of this than he is willing to admit.

Husbands: we are called to represent God’s love to our wives. Jacob wasn’t even TRYING to do that.

Instead he was harsh with her.

Right facts… wrong delivery.

So in response to Jacob’s harshness… Rachel takes her envy… which has now been expressed in demands… and she moves toward…

Self-Actualization (making things happen for herself)

She says, “Here, take my servant Bilhah… that even I may have children through her.”

If you trace the footnote in many of your Bibles, you’ll see that the original Hebrew reads "that even I may [be built up]"

Having CHILDREN was this way of BUILDING UP her status… self-actualization… using all of my creativity and resources to reach my full potential… what I think will fulfill me.

The world would tell you this is exactly what you are supposed to do… but God says that this is the opposite of love.

tells us that Love does not insist on it’s own way...

Jesus showed us that the way of love is laying down your life… not seeking personal fulfillment…

Rachel is missing God’s love as she makes things happen for herself and outsources the intimacy of marriage to her servant girl.

Now through this sinful, self-focused activity, God again was merciful… two more children came through this adulterous relationship.

One is named Dan… which means “God has judged me.”

Just a side note… the tribe that comes from Dan is the tribe that is furthest from the Lord… they are the most idolatrous of all the tribes so much so that they aren’t even named with the 12 tribes in Revelation when Israel is restored.

The second is named Naphtali, which means “with wrestlings of God...”

And the reason she names him that is because she says, “I have wrestled with my sister and prevailed.”

Rachel is FIGHTING GOD and FIGHTING HER SISTER to make herself feel better about her situation.

Self-actualization has now turned into...

One-upmanship

“I have wrestled with my sister and prevailed"

This whole thing of having kids is NOT about sharing intimacy with her husband that results in children…

It’s not about glorifying God with his gift of children...

It’s about self-fulfillment… feeling better about herself because she has produced more effectively than her sister.

Well… not to be outdone… Leah is like, “Oh yeah, well I’ve got a servant too.”

And so she gives Jacob her servant Zilpah...

Notice… he’s just going along with all of it… he’s enjoying whatever woman his wives will put in front of him…

And his passivity as a leader is DESTROYING their home.

But God keeps being merciful… he gives two more boys through Zilpah…

And as Leah names these children, she reveals not just “one-upmanship”… but wholesale idolatry...

Idolatry

Really, Idolatry has been ruling their hearts all along… the idolatry of self-fulfillment.

Leah names one of the two boys Gad which means “God of fortune.”

It’s not about love… it’s not about God’s blessing… the child has now become a god to Leah.

She names the second boy Asher which means “happy” because all the women around her look at her and are jealous.

This whole scene of childbearing through their servants is a form of self-fulfillment…

God had designed childbearing to be about love that is shared between a husband and a wife that then extends to a child.

And in this family, all of that had been outsourced for the sake of self-fulfillment.

I hope it is crystal clear through this example that self-fulfillment and love do not go together.

Your children are not a means to fulfilling your dreams… and making you feel like someone loves you…

Your sexuality is not about gratifying your own desires… God gave us sexuality to express the intimacy of self-sacrificial love within a committed marriage relationship according to his design...

That’s why sexual sin like pornography and any sex outside of marriage and any other sexual sin is so wrong…

...because it starts with the premise “how can I fulfill myself.”

Sexuality… outside of the confines of marriage between one man and one woman… is about “What do I WANT...” instead of “What best expresses God’s love for his people.”

It is taking what God designed as an expression of covenant love…

A way of serving your spouse… and expressing the unique oneness that God ordains…

It’s taking that activity and making it about what will best serve ME.

And it’s disconnecting true intimacy and commitment from the act… and makes it all about fulfilling the participants’ own personal desires...

It’s casting off what God says is holy love for the desire of self-fulfillment.

Think about fornication… sex outside of marriage…

it’s all about what I think will make me happy despite what God has said.

It’s all about seeing if we are compatible so that I can know my desires are going to be fulfilled long-term.

Think about some of the causes of divorce…

“I’m just not happy in this marriage anymore”… Or “they are holding me back from my dreams...” or worse “We just fell out of love.” “I’m getting out.”

That’s not love. Love is a choice to stay in it… even when it’s hard… even when it’s impossible in our own power.... because with God, all things are possible.

Think about the way people treat friendships or even church relationships…

I get mad because I feel like I’m the only one putting anything into this relationship…

I get mad because you didn’t give me what I wanted from the relationship… I’m done.

That’s all about self-fulfillment… and it’s not love.

Have you seen any parts of this pattern play out in your life?: Envy turns into demands which turn into self-actualization (making things happen for yourself) which turns into one-upmanship [feeling better about yourself in comparison to someone else)… which turns into idolatry.

Every step of that pattern is a quest for self-fulfillment which will cause you to miss the love of God.

It’s all focused right here [point to self]

Notice… God’s work isn’t even really being discussed right now. He’s an afterthought…

It’s just “what’s my sister doing… is my husband paying attention… look, other women are thinking well of me...”

God is an afterthought in the whole thing.

It’s important FOR US to remember that he IS working and demonstrating gracious love toward them… these kids being born are the twelve patriarchs he will use to form the twelve tribes of Israel...

But the women and Jacob are oblivious to him because they are so consumed with their own self-fulfillment.

They are missing the love of God which is the only thing that can heal their sin-sick hearts.

You would think that the nonsense meter couldn’t register any higher in this story… but this next scene breaks the dial...

Look at verse 14 [Read ]

Here’s the 3rd way to we can miss God’s love…

3) Try to purchase love (30:14-18)

Explain: This scene ranks up there as one of the weirdest stories in the Bible.

Like, what is the deal with the mandrakes??? What even IS a mandrake?

Well, a mandrake is a root that was thought to be an aphrodisiac as well as a fertility treatment… [show picture]

Because of it’s shape that sort of looks like a woman, it’s been used in witchcraft practices as a means of fertility for thousands of years even to this day.

In fact, when I did a google image search for mandrakes, most of the sites were witchcraft sites (which I did NOT click on, by the way).

And so Reuben (the oldest son) finds these mandrakes while he’s out harvesting the wheat.

And he’s like, “Hey mom, here, maybe these will help you!”

Remember… neither Leah NOR Rachel can have babies right now.

And so Rachel sees these mandrakes and says to Leah, “Hey, give me some of those! Maybe those will help me!”

But Leah is like, “You took my husband… NOW you want my mandrakes...”

And Rachel’s like, “You know what, you can HAVE your husband… I want the mandrakes.”

So Jacob walks in and Leah is like, “YOU’RE MINE TONIGHT. I BOUGHT YOU.”

That’s sick.

And passive Jacob apparently has no problem with this… I can just picture him shrugging his shoulders and going along with it…

And the result is that Leah has another son. And she says, “God has given me my wages.”

She actually thinks she can purchase… not only the love of Jacob… but the love of God...

Listen… just like love cannot be earned, it also cannot be purchased…

If you have to pay… in any currency… for someone to love you… it’s not true love.

Whether that’s doing something they want you to do… or giving something they want you to give… if you think that is what love is…

Teenagers… if anyone ever says to you, “If you do this for me or

It will keep you from experiencing the true love God has for you...

It will distort your perspective on what his love actually is.

AND it will keep you from expressing the love God has called you to give.

You cannot truly love someone when you are trying to purchase love back for yourself.

That becomes a self-serving motive.

So far we’ve looked at three ways to miss the love of God… try to earn love… use love for self-fulfillment… try to purchase love… All of these things have this one thing in common: they...

All of these things have this one thing in common: they...

4) Focus love horizontally (30:19-21)

That’s the last and supreme way to miss the love of God… focus love horizontally.

Make the love of people ultimate and the love of God fades into the background...

[Read ]

Explain: Leah still has her sights set on earning her husbands love… on fulfilling that desire… that longing of her soul… she still thinks more children will earn her favor with her husband...

I think this is one of the saddest statements in the Bible: “now my husband will honor me, because I have borne him six sons.”

After all of this… she is still. waiting.

Because Jacob failed to show love to his wife… and because Leah was so consumed with obtaining it… they both entirely missed the love of God.

The entire focus of ALL of the characters in this passage is on horizontal love of other people… instead of a vertical relationship of love with God himself…

Rachel and Leah are willing to nod to the fact that God is at work… they do that over and over again…

but they think that his work is a means to an end of something else that will truly satisfy...

They use God’s gracious love to get what they want HORIZONTALLY... from other people.

It’s a means to an end for them...

And it leaves the waiting for something that will never come.

We can tend to think this way, can’t we?

I remember Paul David Tripp telling a story about a girl who he was counseling… and if I remember the story correctly, they were talking about God’s love and she blurted out something like, “What good does it do me to know that God loves me when I can’t even get a boyfriend!”

Rarely does it come out of our mouths with that kind of clarity… but too often God’s love seems distant and imaginary… almost mystical… and we think we can be fulfilled by a horizontal… human love…

We can tend to give God’s love a nod… “oh yeah, I guess God loves me… but what about that person over there… why don’t THEY love me the way they should?

Or, “I’ll believe God loves me WHEN… this person starts acting the way I want them to act.”

I’ll believe God loves me IF I get all of the things that I think will satisfy my soul.

The love that God shows us by working on our behalf is not a means to an end… it is the end itself for which we were created.

God created us to be recipients of his love. He created us to be in relationship with HIM.

And then… and only then… can we truly experience what a human relationship of love should be.

As Leah is still pining after Jacob’s love… the tone of the narrative changes slightly before it ends…

Read

We’ve seen four ways to miss God’s love… now back to the big idea:

Seek the arrival of Christ's love that removes your shame and satisfies your soul.

Explain: Remember… up to this point, Leah has had 6 boys and a girl… plus two more boys that are added to her total because they came from her servant… Rachel’s ONLY children came from her servant, Bilhah…

So when it says, “God remembered Rachel… God listened to her…” something different is going on here.

This is a particular grace that God is giving to her.

She

She conceives… bears a son… and says, “God has taken away my reproach.”

-God has taken away my reproach

Remember last week… Sarah’s shame that she experienced from the culture around her due to infertility was removed.

That’s what’s going on here. Rachel’s shame is being removed by the Lord himself as he performs a miracle within her...

This son that God gives her is Joseph… Joseph is a very special son…

Many of you remember Joseph from his technicolor dream-coat...

He is the favorite of his father because he came from Rachel… and Rachel was the favorite wife…

And his father gives him this coat of many colors… which causes his brothers to become jealous (runs in the family)...

Joseph has all these dreams that he tells them about which makes them become even more jealous…

They sell him off into slavery… into Egypt…

He eventually ends up in prison… but by God’s intervention, is given the ability and opportunity to interpret the dreams of Pharoah…

Those dreams reveal that a famine is coming and tells him how the nation can survive it…

and so Joseph becomes second in command of all of Egypt… effectively saving both that nation… and the nation of Israel…

because his brothers come looking for food… and long-story-short… he saves them too.

Joseph is a very special son.... there would be no nation of Israel if it weren’t for God’s work through Joseph… but before any of that, he is the child God uses to take away Rachel’s shame…

And yet... as special as he is as Rachel’s firstborn… he’s not the Son that will satisfy…

Joseph’s name is a play on words that sounds like both the Hebrew word for “taken away” and the Hebrew word for “may he add”

Notice what Rachel says… “May the Lord add to me ANOTHER son...”

Come on, Rachel! You can’t just be satisfied with the one he gave you?

No… because Joseph wasn’t the ultimate son she needed.

Eventually in chapter 35 she would have one more son… his name was Benjamin… but he wasn’t the son she needed either… he couldn’t save her from death…

In fact, Rachel would die giving birth to him… and she would be buried in a town called Bethlehem...

She would be buried in a town called Bethlehem...

And there in her grave she would have to wait over 1800 years for the Son who could completely cover her shame and satisfy her soul…

The son she needed wasn’t a son she could produce… in fact, he wasn’t even one of her descendents…

Ironically the son who would remove her reproach was actually a descendent of Leah…

born of the line of Leah’s fourth son, Judah… the Son of David… who would come many, many years later... born to a virgin named Mary… born in the very town where Rachel was buried called Bethlehem...

He was the son who could take away not only the shame of her barrenness… but the shame of all the sin and guilt caused by her lack of love…

He would take all that sin and shame upon himself… his flesh and blood would be crucified for HER…

He was the son who was the perfect expression of God’s love toward her… and not only her… but toward the whole world… including you...

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.” (, ESV)

The reason God sent his son into the world… was so that the world might be saved through him… specifically through FAITH in him.

Our shame is removed when we believe… when we put our faith and trust in… the name of the only Son of God.

Jesus is the son Rachel needed. Not Joseph… not Benjamin… but Jesus.... the Son of God… the perfect expression of GOD’S love.

And he is the Son that you need today.

Elizabeth had been barren… just like Rachel… but at the time of Mary’s visit she was pregnant with none other than John the Baptist...

But as God prepared the way for the arrival of his son, he opened Elizabeth’s womb and gave her a son named John…

We later come to know him as John the Baptist… the one who baptized Jesus and got people ready for his arrival on the scene of ministry.

And when she found out she was pregnant, Elizabeth would reflect on Rachel’s response to Joseph’s birth...

And so there Mary would hide from the public shaming she would endure back in her hometown of Nazareth..

As she stayed with Elizabeth, Mary would reflect on Rachel’s response to Joseph’s birth...

She all but quotes in when she said, “Thus the Lord has done for me in the days when he looked on me, to take away my reproach among people.”” (, ESV)

Jesus is the fullest expression of God’s love… until we have Jesus’ love, we do not know love.

Luke is pulling Rachel’s story right into the Christmas story by recording that quote...

And she said, “Thus the Lord has done for me in the days when he looked on me, to take away my reproach among people.”” (, ESV)

We can try to find it in the people around us… we can try all we want to earn it or purchase it… we can try to give some form of love away to others in order to earn or purchase their love in return...

But it will never work. Because our love… apart from Christ… is always tainted by the selfishness of our own sin.

And all of these events were pointing to the birth of yet one more son… the son of Promise...

There is nothing you could do to earn God’s love. Instead, you must believe.

Mary would go to visit Elizabeth… and the baby in Elizabeth’s womb would jump for joy at the presence of the Son of God coming into the world.

The book of Ephesians says this… “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” (, ESV)

Not of our own doing… but simply because of who he is… that’s what we see in Leah’s life… in Rachel’s life… in Jacob’s life…

Will you believe it is true in your own life today?

Will you allow his love and grace and mercy to totally transform you from death to life by the power of his Son Jesus Christ who conquered the grave?