Sermon Tone Analysis

- In 2006, there was a large study conducted in the US of 12,000 people from the ages of 15-44 & it is said to be the government’s first comprehensive glimpse into the male psyche

It’s better to marry than to stay single, men said.

That was the finding of a study done in 2006 by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

About 66 percent of men agreed with the statement, “It is better to get married than go through life single,” compared with only 51 percent of women.

—Sharon Jayson, “Marriage Means More to Men,” USA Today (June 1, 2006)

- Well, that might reflect a modern trend in men & women, but it goes nowhere close to what the Corinthian church thought about marriage & singleness

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- In fact, they thought it was better to be single – that the things in the material world were only secondary to spiritual things

- In the previous passage, we looked at last week, we noted that those who were married were abstaining from marital intimacy to spend their time in prayer

- Might sound like a pious thing to do, but such things, no doubt, led some of them to release their frustrations out down at the local shrine, come brothel (was that a consequence of their wives refusal?)

- We have witnessed also how forced celibacy, in the church, has led to sexual abuse

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- Paul deals with 3 groups of people in our short passage today

- In light of their belief that “it is good not to touch a woman” (that is, it is good not to have sexual relations even within marriage) & that singleness is the highest ideal, the apostle has to give some firm council

Q.

What should they do with their marriages?

Can they give them up?

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- The 3 groups of people the apostle covers will not cover every possible scenario you might find within the thorny lives of people on planet earth

- He is dealing with the Corinthian’s questions & general scenarios

- The 3 groups of people are as follows:

1. Widowers and Widows (v.8-9)

2. Married Couples (v.10-11)

3. Mixed Marriages (one converted after getting married) (v.12-16)

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- By & large, the Corinthians are advocating singleness as the more holy way – as a way to connect with God; as the only authentic connection

- The message of the Spirit through Paul , however, is that it is not the more holy way

- Being single may allow you to serve God with undivided attention, if & only if, you have that special gifting to not need marriage

- But if you have been given the special gifting for marriage, then you are to maintain that marriage

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- But can I warn you here about what you might expect to find or not find in this message

- You will need to keep in mind that the questions you may ask, may not be the questions the Corinthian church are asking – which means that the answers you get, may not be the answers you are expecting

The apostle likes to lay down the

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- Let’s begin then

1. Widowers and Widows To Remain Single if They Can

—8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am.

- The question we ask here is who are the unmarried?

Widows is plain enough

- A widow is a woman whose husband has died

- The black widow spider is named that way because the female has a jet black body with a red stripe down the back – yes, she is called the Red Back spider here in Australia

- But she is called the black widow spider in the US because after mating, she kills & eats her mate, technically leaving her a widow

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Q.

Who are the unmarried?

- This has been debated for years, but it seems right to say that this is referring to widowers – a man whose wife has died

- We can suggest at least 2 reasons for this

1.

All throughout this section, the apostle has dealt with corresponding pairs – male & female

- wife, husband, husband wife; unbelieving wife, believing husband etc.

2. Since a widow is an unmarried person, why mention widows along with the unmarried?

- Actually, the word unmarried was used of widower because they rarely used that word for him & often just referred to him as an unmarried man

- wife, husband, husband wife; unbelieving wife, believing husband etc.

- It seems fairly settled then, that the unmarried here refers to a widower – so “to the widowers & widows, I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am”

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- You could understand that if one of the spouses died of old age, that there should be no problem for that person to remain single

Q.

But what about a young widower or widow?

- Widows & widowers were often very young in the Greco Roman world

- They suffered from many troubles, notably disease, death in child birth & death from war

Q.

Should they marry again?

Q.

If you lost your spouse at 30 yrs of age, should you remain single for the rest of your life?

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- Well, here’s the thing – as a Christian, a disciple of Christ – we are slaves to Christ – owned by another

- We have been bought with the precious blood of Jesus

- We are no longer masters of our destiny

- We have, willingly, given our lives to Christ & we are now found in Him

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- So in one sense, it is better to be single & to be able to serve Jesus with undivided devotion, yet the Corinthians reason seems to be a bit different from this

- They have the problem of a dualistic worldview

- They have relegated the material world of matter to a lesser value than the spiritual world & see it as evil

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- Their reasons for singleness has more to do with their disdain of the body & of bodily pleasures, than it has to do with serving God in an unobstructed way

- They want an escape from the physical which they see as a hindrance to their relationship with God

- To an extent, we do the same

- We way the likes of prayer, Bible study, missionaries, Pastors as on a higher level than the normal Joe Blow

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- The thinking is that since I’m not a pastor nor missionary, then my contribution is only second rate

- The devil loves the church to think this way

- If he can get the church to think this way, then you have a whole host of people, who think what they do in life, is second rate & what they do in the church is of little value

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- In fact, the opposite is true – you are desperately needed to serve Christ in His church & out their in the community

- Pastors & missionaries do so little compared to what you can do & be in the church & in the community

- It is you who brings Christ into the world

- What I do is merely help equip you to be that person

- Pastors & missionaries are merely the cogs in the wheel

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- Of course, what we do is important, but if you see what we do as a more spiritual enterprise, then you have been taken in by dualism

- God created the world & we live in the physical realm & God created it good

- In fact, we do not exist outside the creation – we can’t because we are not God

- Just be careful that you are not trying to excuse yourself from who you are as a Christian on the basis that you are just a person in the pew

- That would be sad & that would be a lie

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- As we come to consider the position of widowers & widows, it comes down to whether they have the spiritual gifting of God to live as a single person

- If they don’t, then they posses the spiritual gifting from God for marriage & should pursue that

- The way you can tell if you have the spiritual gifting for marriage is whether you burn in passion for marital relationship

- If this is the case, he says, then let the widowers & widows remarry

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- This is not weakness, this is what God has bequeathed to them

- Let’s face it, if God only bequeathed the gift of singleness, then you & I would not be born – true!

- Let us not see that God’s gifting of singleness is better than His gifting for marriage – both are equally His gifts & both are good

2. Christians Must Not Divorce

Q.

What about a married couple who are both Christian – should they divorce to pursue a spiritual relationship with the Lord?

- Absolutely not, he says & he bases this not on the message of the Spirit through him, but the message of Jesus Himself

- We have a direct word of Jesus on this situation to the Jewish men

- Jewish men who shared the same faith & values as the Jewish women

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—18 “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries one who is divorced from a husband commits adultery.

- Jesus adds to this that it was God who brought the couple together to be one flesh, therefore, what God joins together, let not man separate

- The disciples, who were Jewish men & who were use to their right to divorce a wife & remarry were quite disturbed by this

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-- 10 The disciples said to Him, "If the relationship of the man with his wife is like this, it is better not to marry."

- To be stuck with the one person for life was inconceivable

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- But this is God’s way & as far as Paul is concerned, if Jesus said it, it ends all debate

- He then says that if the Corinthians so want to divorce, then they can, but both husband & wife may never remarry

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- Years ago when I was a Deacon at the Southport Church of Christ I was spending time with a guy whose wife got caught up in a Charismatic church – they were both SCC attendees but she got caught up in this Charismatic church