Sermon Tone Analysis
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The Plot to Kill a Guy Who Already Died
What Happened: Most Christians know that Jesus was #1 on the Pharisees’ list of Israel’s Most Wanted to get rid of.
But do you know who #2 was?
Lazarus.
After Jesus raised his friend from the dead, Lazarus became a local celebrity, telling people about Jesus’ miraculous power over life and death.
The religious leaders couldn’t have that, so they schemed to kill him too.
Or re-kill him, as the case might be.
Remember:
The reason Lazarus was a threat was because his testimony of what God had done in his life changed the people around him.
What a great example for us!
Worst Hair Day Ever
2 Samuel 18:9
What Happened: King David’s pretty boy son staged a coup and drove his father out of Jerusalem.
I say “pretty boy” because he had lovely locks of hair that he actually weighed when he got a yearly haircut ().
Later, when David had gathered his loyal supporters to take the kingdom back, Absalom fled the battle on his horse… until his long hair got tangled in a tree and left him hanging there until he was captured and killed.
Should’ve gotten a trim before the battle, clearly.
Literally this reference to “head” means”hair of the head”.
Remember: The little detail about Absalom's long locks was mentioned four chapters before the story of his death.
The Bible doesn't typically mention a person's physical appearance unless it has something to do with the story, kind of like foreshadowing.
(But does that make the method of Absalom's death less weird?
Not really.)
Sometimes, the thing that makes us vain can kill us.
Be careful what you brag about and bank on.
Outsmarted by A Donkey
describes an interaction between Balak and Balaam where Balak wanted Balaam to come and curse the Israelites.
What Happened: The Israelites were marching into the Promised Land, conquering cities and winning battles, and the Moabite king got nervous.
So he summoned a guy named Balaam to come and put a curse on the Israelites.
Baalam started to leave for his curse-making assignment, but his donkey started acting really strangely, first running away, then smashing his leg against the canyon, and finally talking.
He told Baalam, basically, “Quit beating me up! I’m just trying to keep you from being cut to pieces by the angel with the giant sword blocking our path.”
Then the angel revealed himself, informed Baalam that the cursing would not work, and let him pass.
(Spoiler alert: When he finally gets to his destination, Baalam is only able to bless Israel and prophesy good things about them, to no one’s surprise.)
The prophet Balaam was riding on his donkey when the donkey suddenly turned off the road into a field.
After hitting the donkey to get back to the road, the donkey started pushing Balaam’s leg up against a wall.
After hitting his donkey again to move, the donkey just laid down.
So Balaam, angry that his donkey wasn’t cooperating, struck it again.
The Bible tells us what happened next:
Then the Lord opened the mouth of the donkey, and she said to Balaam,
“What have I done to you, that you have struck me these three times?”
And Balaam said to the donkey, “Because you have made a fool of me.
I wish I had a sword in my hand, for then I would kill you.”
()
Apparently Balaam is too angry to realize that his donkey is talking to him.
And the donkey said to Balaam,
“Am I not your donkey, on which you have ridden all your life long to this day?
Is it my habit to treat you this way?”
And he said, “No.”
()
Amazingly, the donkey wins the argument!
Then the Lord opened the eyes of Balaam, and he saw the angel of the Lord standing in the way, with his drawn sword in his hand.
And he bowed down and fell on his face.
And the angel of the Lord said to him, “Why have you struck your donkey these three times?
Behold, I have come out to oppose you because your way is perverse before me.
The donkey saw me and turned aside before me these three times.
If she had not turned aside from me, surely just now I would have killed you and let her live.”
()
Then the Lord opened the eyes of Balaam, and he saw the angel of the Lord standing in the way, with his drawn sword in his hand.
And he bowed down and fell on his face.
And the angel of the Lord said to him, “Why have you struck your donkey these three times?
Behold, I have come out to oppose you because your way is perverse before me.
The donkey saw me and turned aside before me these three times.
If she had not turned aside from me, surely just now I would have killed you and let her live.”
()
What Happened: The Israelites were marching into the Promised Land, conquering cities and winning battles, and the Moabite king got nervous.
So he summoned a guy named Balaam to come and put a curse on the Israelites.
Baalam started to leave for his curse-making assignment, but his donkey started acting really strangely, first running away, then smashing his leg against the canyon, and finally talking.
He told Baalam, basically, “Quit beating me up! I’m just trying to keep you from being cut to pieces by the angel with the giant sword blocking our path.”
Then the angel revealed himself, informed Baalam that the cursing would not work, and let him pass.
(Spoiler alert: When he finally gets to his destination, Baalam is only able to bless Israel and prophesy good things about them, to no one’s surprise.)
Remember:
God was good at getting people’s attention in ways that made sense to their culture.
Prophecies, plagues, stars, burning bushes, fingers writing words on a wall, talking animals—
God can use anything to convey his message.
Denying God does not mean He does not exist.
Do Not Tease The Prophet
What Happened: Elisha the prophet was traveling, going about his message-from-God business, when a gang of teenagers surrounded him and started harassing him, yelling insults and calling him “baldy.”
Proving that the Lord doesn’t take mockery lightly, he answered Elisha’s prayer for justice with two angry bears who attacked the group and mauled over 40 of the young men.
Hopefully, the other ones learned their lesson.
Remember:
If people don’t respect the prophet, they won’t respect the message he brings… and that’s a serious, life-or-death matter.
Don’t let your mouth outrun your head
Don’t let the messenger distract you from the message.
So, what did I learn from all these stories?
I Learned:
What a great example for us!-Does my Life impact others?
Be careful what you brag about and bank on.
God can use anything to convey his message.
Denying God does not mean He does not exist.
Don’t let the messenger distract you from the message.
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