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Introduction
Getting close to the end of Ephesians.
Paul has moved from the theological instruction of what it means to be a Christian, where we learned about
God has had a plan for our salvation since the formation of the world
Spiritually dead because of our trespasses and sins
God made atonement for sins, forgiving our sins through the death of Jesus on the cross
We are now saints, children of God who will inherit an eternal Kingdom
All because of the wonderful work of Jesus on a Cross, and we receive this amazing gift (not the right word) through faith
Paul then moved toward the life of a Christian
That we have this new life, not just a changed life, but a supernatural born again life, because of our faith in Jesus Christ
And We are to live out or walk this new life through imitating our heavenly Father
Walk in Love
Walk in Light
Walk in Wisdom
And so far we have seen some practical examples of what this looks like but now Paul addresses the Christian life in one most basic environments: Relationships
God is a relational god and he made us to also be in relationships.
God is in relationship with Himself (Father, Son, HS) and he chose to be in relationship with us when he created us in his image and likeness.
Everyone is in a relationship wether they now it or not.
Illustration: I’m not talking about a DTR moment, where lets define this relationship are we dating or not.
I have a friend from college who once took out a girl a couple of times in his mind as a friend, before he knew it she had made it facebook official that they were in a relationship.
Fast forward two years and they were married!
Everyone is in a relationship either as a child, a parent, an employee, or employer
And Relationships reveal a lot about a person:
compassionate or harsh
patient or quick
selfish or selfless
You can’t tell if someone is a good friend from their report card.
A runners time in a race doesn’t say if they have a good relationship with their parents.
So it makes since that Paul would address what a Christian life looks like in relationships, because so much of who we truly are is tied into our relationships.
And He does so with a simple word, Submit
Key Verse:
Christian relationships are defined by submitting to one another, out of respect for Christ.
This does not mean that:
submission makes a person inferior to the person whom they are submitting to
submission makes a person superior to someone else
submission makes people unequal
Gal 3:
We are all equal in our nature in Christ.
But that doesn’t mean that we don’t play different roles or have different responsibilities.
Jesus evened learned to play the role of submission
Jesus was God himself in nature and thus equal with the Father and the Holy Spirit, still he submitted to the will of the Father.
Submission has nothing to do with superiority or inferiority, but with the roles and responsibilities we have in our lives.
So let’s look at three PRIMARY relationships and how the Christian life plays out through submission out of respect for Christ.
Marriage
Family
Work
Marriage, 5:22-32
The husband submits to his wife by leading her like Christ leads the church.
Eph 5:
Care and Provision
Spiritual Leadership
Self-sacrifical Love
Care and Provision
Spiritual leadership
Studies show that if a child is first to get saved, then 3.5% chance of the rest of the household will fill; mother 17%, father 93%
IMB: Women Applicants outnumber men 7 to 1!
Self-sacrificial love
This is how Christian marriage is so different from the world.
The worldly husband thinks.
“I’m going to get a wife and she is going to care for me, she is going to make me dinner, rub my head, wash my dirty clothes, while I hangout with the guys.
She is going to love me because i’m awesome.
And if she doesn’t think I’m awesome then, I will find someone who does think I’m awesome and will love me in those ways.
The Christian husband says no: I will submit to you by leading you through care and provision, having your spiritual wellbeing as a primary concern, and sacrificing myself for you.
Application: You might be thinking, I’m a teenager, I’m not close to getting married.
That is true, but your preparation to become the man God desires you to be starts now not later.
Question: What are some ways Christian marriage is different from non-Christian marriages
Wives reflect Jesus in how they submit to that leadership
Eph 5:
“submit to your husbands in everything”
What does that mean?
It doesn’t mean:
man is dominant over his wife
women are to submit to all men
women cannot lead
women do not have a voice
What it does mean:
Kathy Keller “It means that in matters of disagreement I yield to Tim the deciding vote.
I get a vote, he gets a vote; he gets the deciding vote.”
Move to NYC.
He felt yes, she no.
They had to make a decision.
He conceded: “Ok if you don’t want to go, we won’t go.”
Kathy: “Oh no you don’t… you’re not putting this on me.
You have to make it and bear the responsibility.”
“Spiritual leadership means the husband has the burden of responsibility”
Application: Guys you want to take a girl on a date don’t wait until you get in the car and ask, “what do you want to eat?” Instead find out what food she likes, where she likes to go, and take her out.
Lead her.
If its not good, apologize and course correct.
Spiritual leadership means he has the burden of responsibility
“Marriage, is not first and foremost about making you happy in a perfect spouse, but making you holy by teaching you to love like Jesus.”
Children and Parents, 6:1-4
Family is a relationship where children learn to obey God by obeying their parents.
When we are young, our parents represent the authority of God to us.
In a way, they stand in for God for a time.
We first learn to obey and submit to God by obeying and submitting to them
That means, for you guys, how you submit to the authority of your mom and dad is how you submit to God.
LET THAT SIT THERE
The command in not to obey, but to honor your parents
As a child you honor your parents by obeying them
When you get older you honor them in different ways
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