Home Improvements
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What a great morning this is. We had a tremendous service last week. Two of them actually. This new 8 am service has been a great thing and I cannot wait to see it grow. The baptism last week and the demation we had I mean dedication we had. Let me tell you that story, then we can get started with the sermon.
So this week we are beginning a series entitled Home Improvement. I am teaching this and wanting to do this series not because I grew up in a perfect family or because I believe I have all the answers but I believe the bible has some things that can really improve our home life if we will follow them. The problem is that some of you in here today, don’t know the bible. You don’t know if God has a plan for you or a purpose for you. So we really need to go back to the beginning to really grasp this.
Let’s look at Genesis chapter 1. If you don’t know where that is at the top of your bible app is a search function. Use or of you are old school use the table of contents. It’s ok chances are you neighbor doesn’t know either. But let’s look at and just hold your place there.
Genesis 2:15-25
Then the Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to tend and keep it.
And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat;
but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”
And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name.
So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.
And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place.
Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.”
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
I believe that I have the answer for your troubles with every single relationship. Whether it is your kids, your spouse, fiance, boy friend or girlfriend, I have the answer. The biggest problem like I said is that you don’t believe you have a purpose so you don’t believe that your relationships have purpose. The lie fo the world is that you are just random cells and molecules bumping around that came from nothing and they just so happen to come together when there was nothing to come together to and all of your situations and thoughts are just a chemical reaction that made you who you are. Over time. But if you don’t believe that you have a purpose you will never believe that your relationships have purpose. I see you don’t believe me so let me help ya.
It’s always better if you can have an example. About a trillion years ago there was this clear liquid floating around. It’s weird just stay with me. Then after some time about a million years, this clear material called plastic began to form around this clear delicious liquid. I mean it just crawled right up on it. Then after about 4 million years, paint came crawled up on that plastic. It doesn't make sense but when we add time to it, it makes sense. So paint wrote on the plastic and it spelled deer park.
Does any one believe this. We have kids in here. Let me ask them. Kids do you believe that tis water magically appeared and it magically appeared into a bottle that some how had writing put on it. No none of them do. They understand that someone had to create that water bottle. If I can’t convince you of the water bottle why oh why would you allow someone to convince you that you came from nothing. This thing has one purpose. This thing will not date, will not cry, does not laugh, can’t see, taste, touch, has no thought. But you don’t believe it came from nothing.
We have bought into the lie though. Because I said it last week that if you don’t tell the voices to shut up, they begin to repeat the lie consistently enough and loud enough you begin to believe it. But a tornado cannot hit a junk yard and make a 747. You cannot have an explosion in an ink gallery and form a dictionary.
The lie is there was this goo that was floating around or swimming in the ocean and all of a sudden developed lungs and legs and decided with the brain it didn’t have to go out of the water. But you know that can’t be true because that slime had to have little girl and boy slime and you know if you have parents your kids are never ready to go when you are. Especially your daughters.
See I believe that every relationship is designed so taht people can get a glimpse of heaven through you. Your marriage should show people who Christ is so that they want to know who you know and go where you go. We are supposed to give as we have been given. Freely. Christ gave us 5 things that we are supposed to give freely. What are those five things?
Love, Service, Submission, Forgiveness and Acceptance
Love service submission forgiveness and acceptance
If we would give those tings more our marriages, our relationships with kids our homes, would be pinnacles of aspiration for people to ascend to instead of us falling into the same valleys that the rest of the world falls into. If we go to our verses, we will see some things that are meant to happen in relationships.
What is the problem in relationships?
Genesis 2:
Then the Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to tend and keep it.
And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat;
but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”
And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name.
So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.
And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place.
Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.”
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Then the Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to tend and keep it.
See Adam had a job. The man had a job before their was sin in the world. The job is not the problem in your relationship.
And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat;
And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat;
but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”
Now here is where a lot of people stop becaue we kno that Adam didn’t die. The bible is a contradiciton right here. God said he would die and he didn’t so God lied therefore the rest of the bible can’t be trusted. The problem isn’t the bible. It is your English. English wasn’t around when the bible was written. The word was in Hebrew muwth muwth. Which means that you will be die until you are dead. As soon as you are born, you are muwth muwthing. In fact, I am muwth muwthing right now.
18-
And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name.
So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.
Adam realizes there is nothing for him.
Genesis
And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place.
Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.”
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Adam calls her woman. You know Eve doesn’t get her name until after sin. You know what happen don’t you. He said woman, look at this goat. I named him. He said woman let’s go down to the beach. He said woman let’s ride this ostrich down to get some grapes. Sin comes in he syas woman. She raises her hadn and says if you call me woman more time. He siad Eve, Eve, I mean eve.
I’ll show you call me woman.
Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, “Has God indeed said, ‘You shall not eat of every tree of the garden’?”
And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat the fruit of the trees of the garden;
but of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat it, nor shall you touch it, lest you die.’ ”
Then the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die.
For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”
So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.
Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings.
Look at Adam and all of us men have the same problem calles passivitey. Hwas sitting there next to her when she took the bite. He didn’t smack it out of her hand. He didn’t ring the neck of that serpant. He did nothing. Men we have to be men. There is nothing wrong with being a man. There is no such thing as toxic masculinaty. There are perferts. There are bad men but that doesn’t make everyone bad. Nor does it mean that the things we do as men or are supposed to do are bad. YOu can be a man and still respect women. In fact if you don’t respect them, you arent a man. Sometimes it take a man to protect a woman. Had Adam stood up in this moment and attempted to save her in steat of avoiding the conflict who know what we would be doing right now.
But that was for free. Here is the real issue right now. Look at the last verse again.
Genesis
Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings.
They made coverings for themselves. Instead of Adam consoling his wife, grabbing her and hugging her and saying we will make it through this. Instead of Eve looking at her husband wondering what they had down and hwo they can fix it. Each of them looked out for themselves. This is the same problem plaguing marriages and relationships today. You ready for it.
The number one problem in your relationships is YOU!
The crowd goes wild!!! Nope that is normally when everyone points to their neighbor and say he is talking about you. Everyone that ever comes to counseling for their relationships says fix them. Let me tell you what he did. He did this and she did that. IF he wouldn’t say this, then I wouldn’t do that. It is always pointing the finger at the other person because they are the problem. Do exactly what I say and our relationship will be great.
You want to fix your relationship today? Here is the key.
Keep the main thing the priority. You are not the main thing.
You’re not the focus. You will never make the relationship if all you are focused on is yourself. You were never created to be the center. You can’t carry that load. You are not strong enough. Nor big enough.
So first thing...
Let God build the house.
Unless the Lord builds the house, They labor in vain who build it; Unless the Lord guards the city, The watchman stays awake in vain.
Unless God builds it. You sitting up here and trying to make soemthing work that God ain’t in. God was never in it. He never meant for you to be iwth that person. But since you didn’t ask Him first now you are stuck.
Trying to build a home without God is just playing house.
Marriage is a relationship in which God is at the center. there are plenty of people who are living together and exchanged rings but are not married. They are just playing house.
The next things you have to do is
Consult expert builders
Without counsel, plans go awry, But in the multitude of counselors they are established.
Before you take someone’s constructive criticism, find out if they ever constructed anything.
Be flexible in the plan.
Heat in a relationsihp is designed to make you more pliable.
For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise:
Build on a strong foundation.
LOve is the foundation. There are too many contract marriages. Youd o for me and i will do for you. I will stay as long as you do this.
having been built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ Himself being the chief cornerstone,