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Friend or Foe - 1 Samuel 18:1-30
PRAY
Let’s get us from last week to this week:
David’s continued path of training/education/preparation (in character and competence for the task the Lord had anointed him for and was preparing him for) would not always be pleasant.
Some 14-15 years later David would indeed be equipped to be an excellent king in Israel, but there was yet a long road ahead.
In that process, David would find not only a true friend but also a most unnecessary and undesirable foe from a unique source: the royal family.
The prince would prove his true friend but the king a most sinister and persistent enemy.
Before our journey through chapter 18 is done, I want us to apply the challenge we find here to our relationships, particularly in the body of Christ.
- Our desire should be for the flourishing of others to the glory of God. - In this effort, our own heart motives and maladies prove to be our greatest obstacles.
[We should see the fingerprints of a true Christian spirit versus an unChristian spirit all over this.]
18:1-7 David’s Popularity and Jonathan’s Sincerity
Saul at first brings David into the fold to his own benefit.
(see 1 Sam 14:52) - “Keep him close” to keep an eye on him was no doubt also in his mind.
Jonathan’s love for David…
Jonathan’s love for David is grounded in a common thread, a heart for a shared priority.
Undoubtedly what attracted Jonathan to David was his heroic effort with an outspoken commitment to and confidence in God.
Notice too that we’ve already begun to see that David’s time as a shepherd has prepared him to have a loving, protective heart.
So too we will see in the friendship between Jonathan and David that Jonathan is loving and protective as well.
His love for David exemplifies a central Christian ethic: love your neighbor as yourself.
- Jonathan loves David as himself.
His love for David stirs him to codify their commitment to one another.
Jonathan and David covenanted their love, their friendship, that they would not make enemies of one another.
- a codified commitment and agreement
His love for David displays its sincerity in honoring David without concern for self-importance.
Jonathan honors David.
(Rom 12:9-10, see also 12:3)
[It is evident that] Jonathan would love to see David flourish.
- Christian love seeks the best for the other person.
- Jonathan’s example is good, Jesus’ example even better.
Php 2:3-8
[Now let’s see Saul’s reaction to David’s growing popularity.]
18:8-21 Jealousy Rules over Saul
Jealousy Reigns in Saul’s Heart (displeased, dangerous, deceitful, distracted/derailed)
Jealousy Makes Saul…
Jealousy causes Saul to be displeased when he ought to be thankful.
He makes him fearful of a friend’s success, blessing by God.
(fearful for the absolute worst reason - bc God was with David) - ESVSB footnote that is RIGHT ON the money: “Saul’s primary concern was not the Lord’s honor or the people’s welfare but himself.”
Jealousy makes Saul unreasonable, a danger to his friends (and to himself).
He makes an enemy out of a friend.
- Saul DID NOT need to make an enemy of David.
Jealousy causes Saul to use other loved ones as pons, as weapons.
(making ill use of Michal’s love for David)
Jealousy twists Saul’s heart to the point of using a brother’s designs for God’s glory as a weapon against him.
(17b only be valiant for me and fight the Lord’s battles - using David’s zeal for God against him)
Jealousy makes Saul lose all sight of who the true enemy is.
(esp.
25c)
Saul’s jealousy succeeds in only making himself more miserable, in ensuring his demise.
(Jealousy also harms others who aren’t the intended object.)
[How does David fair in this process?]
18:22-30 Meanwhile, the Lord Still Rules over David
Since the Lord reigns in David’s heart, David remains genuine.
David Remains…
Humble - His response to Saul’s servants.
Sincere in his efforts to serve and honor the king.
- His response to Saul’s bride-price of valor.
(It pleased David well to be the King’s son-in-law if he could honor the king and fight God’s enemies in the process.)
Successful in God’s hands - Because God is with David, his attempts to bring David down only build David up.
(I wish it was always the case that our jealousy and envious attempts to harm the object of our jealousy failed miserably.
Unfortunately things like bullying and jealousy and strife among teammates does greatly harm each other and does hinder the progress of the body of Christ.)
Thankfully though, God IS always bigger and in control even over the evil intent of the enemy (under the guise of a friend).
God honors David and God honors Jonathan.
Saul gets on the fruit of his envy—heaps of misery.
(Additional) Application
What about when we don’t just “click” like David and Jonathan.
- (We make the extra effort to) Love Your Neighbor as Yourself [in the context of Luke 10 and “who is my neighbor,” Jesus tells the parable of the good Samaritan]
It also isn’t uncommon that we can make life and ministry more difficult for one another.
A Christian Approach to Conflict Resolution: 7 Steps
Give one another the benefit of the doubt.
Let the small stuff slide.
Mind the plank (in your own eye).
Take it directly to the person.
Communicate openly but sensitively.
Encourage as well as challenge.
Give one another grace (room and time) to grow.
[rinse and repeat]
Here’s a recommendation that I have for keeping jealousy at bay AND digging up envy by the roots - Pray like Col 1:9-14
We must submit to the rule of Christ.
“The only right choice is to relinquish any thought of attempting to maintain control and authority over our own lives, and to submit to Him alone who is qualified to reign.”
(Bob Deffinbaugh)
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