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Kevin Kinnett

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Man of God

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With that in mind, please open your Bible now to .

Now, here's the nutshell summary of what we're talking about this morning: the transformed Gospel of Jesus Christ makes it possible for men and for women, for children, to live out their roles in the kind of harmony and effectiveness that's consistent with our original design. That's what it is. You see, the home, the church, even the community doesn't have to be like the Lord of the flies because of the Lord of heaven. Our Lord Jesus Christ is powerful enough to call and to grow and to direct godly principled men.

Now, here's the nutshell summary of what we're talking about this morning: a life that is transformed by the Gospel of Jesus Christ makes it possible for men, women, and children to live out their roles the way God intended.

Let’s begin in and follow the argument of the text.

Read

Let's see how he does that from this marvelous passage and I'm going to read beginning in and what I want to ask you to do is to carefully follow the logic, the argument of the text. Now, you've been listening attentively to what I have been saying thus far, thank you for that, when we open the word then our attentiveness is even ratcheted up further, right? So this is not the time to think about lunch. It's not the time to think about anything other than what is God saying to us. That's how we are renewed in the spirit of our minds and not conformed to this world. So please pay careful attention to the flow of thought in this text. , beginning in verse 15, Paul says,

Ephesians 5:15 NASB95

Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise,

Now please pay careful attention to the flow of thought in this text. , beginning in verse 15, Paul says,

Ephesians 5:16 NASB95

making the most of your time, because the days are evil.

Main Point: The Man of God is A Man of Grace.

"Therefore be careful how you walk," amen to that, huh? "Not as unwise men," who would want to be one of those? "But as wise, making the most of your time," why? "Because the days are evil." Any question about that? "So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife," anything unclear about that? "The husband is the head of the wife as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her," why? Now please follow very carefully why, "so that He might sanctify her," there it is, "having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word," don't you love that? "That He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband."

Grace exudes from his role as a man, a husband, and a father.

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."

3 characteristics from this text of a man who lives and who leads well.

Aren't you glad for the word? Wow, what a great passage of Scripture. We are talking this morning about the man of the house, a husband and a father of grace and let's think now about 3 characteristics from this text of a man who lives and who leads well. First of all, he's a man who values sanctification. I think the epistle of Ephesians is the kind of book that could be read profitably by followers of Jesus Christ about once a month and I would really recommend you to find times where you can read a book like Ephesians in one sitting so you could follow the entire flow of thought. Unless you fuss at me about that, that's the equivalent of watching like one goofy half hour of television. Most can find time for that in one sitting, right? So aren't you thankful for a pastor who encourages you to do some other things? Yeah, you're loving me. I appreciate that.

He's a man who values sanctification.

Notice here how Paul is comparing a husband's relationship to his wife and family to Christ's relationship to the church.

Now, you saw, Paul is comparing a husband's relationship to his wife and family to what? Yeah, to Christ's relationship to the church. With this entire book, if you think about the flow of thought in the entire book, explains, is founded on the power of the Gospel, the transforming message of the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ and Paul is driving to this point: a principled man has been positionally sanctified, he is being progressively sanctified and on that foundation, he's seeking to have a similar effect on his wife and his children. So it's not just a matter of a man loving his wife or loving his children, his love is a sanctifying love.

The flow of thought in this entire book is founded upon the power of the Gospel.

The power of the gospel transforms our thinking.

The man of God now lives by the principles of God’s Word instead of how he feels at the moment…He recognizes that as a child of God he is now positionally sanctified and is progressively being sanctified into the image of Christ.

He also recognizes he is to seek having that similar effect on his wife and children.

It's not enough to simply love his wife or love his children, his love seeks to sanctifying them.

Here are the reasons why a godly man values sanctification.

You recognize the urgency of our day.

Ephesians 4:15–16 NASB95

but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.

eph 4:15

"Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil." There is a carefulness here. Just like we saw last week when we were talking about godly women and Samson's mom, there is a concern about avoiding the ways of an unwise man. Who wants to be that, huh? And the corresponding desire to grow in biblical wisdom. There is also an urgency to all of this, isn't there? Wanting to make the most of your time. Did you do that this week? Because the days in which we live our evil.

There is a carefulness here...there is a concern about avoiding the ways of an unwise man…and the corresponding desire is to grow in biblical wisdom.

There is also an urgency to all of this…wanting to make the most of your time…because the days in which we live our evil.

The power of the gospel means that the man of God has been set apart from the influence of the world.

That's what the word "sanctify" means. Christ is powerful enough and the Gospel is comprehensive enough to make you a godly man, a man who is wise beyond your years.

You also possess the power of the Holy Spirit.

That's where verses 18 and 19 fit into this.

The theme is control.

"Don't be controlled by chemicals in the blood stream but instead, be controlled by the Spirit of God,"

The power of the Holy Spirit in your life says that it doesn’t matter what baggage you bring from your past, the Holy Spirit changes all that and says you can be a godly man.

He has a thankful and submissive heart.

He's always giving thanks.

Ephesians 5:20–21 NASB95

always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.

He's a wise man.

How have you been worshipping this morning? Who have you been worshipping this morning?

And do you understand that you decide what you're going to love? You decide what's going to thrill your heart. You decide what you're going to be passionate about. Friend, we're talking about a man, we're talking about a man whose heart is thrilled that Jesus saved him. Whose heart is thrilled that he has been sanctified. Whose heart is thrilled with the cross. But that is a choice that every man makes. You see, what that means, when you have a man like that, tie it to leadership. That erases the pride. That erases the domineering spirit. That's what leads to the submissive heart that qualifies and directs his leadership. Every one of these words in this text is worthy of careful consideration and reflection.

Do you understand that you decide what you're going to love? You decide what's going to thrill your heart. You decide what you're going to be passionate about.

We’re considering this morning a man whose heart is thrilled that Jesus saved him…whose heart is thrilled that he has been sanctified. …whose heart is thrilled with the cross.

But that is a choice that every man makes.

You see, what that means, when you have a man like that, it impacts your leadership. It erases the pride. It erases the domineering spirit. It qualifies and directs his leadership.

Every one of these words in this text is worthy of careful consideration and reflection.

He understands that his marriage and his family are to be a picture of Christ's relationship to the church.

Paul is very specific about what that means.

Please follow carefully the argument and look for the purpose clauses, words like "so that."

Ephesians 5:25–26 NASB95

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,

Eph 5:25-

Now, here's what that means: you could call that leadership with a purpose. You could call that leadership which is seeking to get oneself and a group of people to a different place. Getting oneself and a group of people, your family, to a better place which meant he's been positionally sanctified first himself.

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her," why? "So that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word." Now, here's what that means: you could call that leadership with a purpose. You could call that leadership which is seeking to get oneself and a group of people to a different place. Getting oneself and a group of people, your family, to a better place which meant he's been positionally sanctified first himself.

You say, "What do you mean by that?" Well, it's one way of saying that there has been a definite time where he has admitted his sin and placed his faith and trust in Christ as Savior and Lord.

There are all sorts of ways of describing that decision made at a point in time to become a Christian but the way that Paul selects here is that of being washed by the water of the word.

In other words, a man who has not done something about his own sin couldn't possibly lead somebody else out of theirs. Washed by the water of the word.

Colossians 1:13 NASB95

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son,

Colossians 1:14 NASB95

in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

That’s the positional sanctification I mentioned earlier…and now he is being progressively sanctified. That's what Jesus meant in .

John 13:10 NASB95

Jesus said to him, “He who has bathed needs only to wash his feet, but is completely clean; and you are clean, but not all of you.”

"For he rescued us from the domain of darkness." Think about it: "For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins." That's what it means to be positionally sanctified and now he is being progressively sanctified. That's what Jesus meant. We could talk about this from all sorts of passages but here's a fascinating one. When Jesus was having this conversation with Peter about whether or not he needed to wash his feet. Do you remember this? , "Jesus said to him, 'He who has bathed,'" in other words, has been saved, has trusted Christ, has been washed by the water of the word, "'needs only to wash his feet.'" You see, a godly man understands the place and the power of both: positional sanctification, the moment he trusts Christ and progressive sanctification to continue to change and grow and here's a man who is thankful for both. He's thankful for his salvation where he was sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise the moment he believed and he's thankful for ongoing progressive sanctification where he is becoming more and more like Jesus Christ each and every day. And it's on that foundation that he understands his role is to lead his wife and his children down that same path. You see, that's the way in which husbands are to love their wives and their families, to be busy about the matter of growing spiritually and then purposely and proactively helping others to do the same.

In other words, he who has been saved, has trusted Christ, has been washed by the water of the word, "'needs only to wash his feet.'"

We could talk about this from all sorts of passages but here's a fascinating one. When Jesus was having this conversation with Peter about whether or not he needed to wash his feet. Do you remember this? , "Jesus said to him, 'He who has bathed,'" in other words, has been saved, has trusted Christ, has been washed by the water of the word, "'needs only to wash his feet.'" You see, a godly man understands the place and the power of both: positional sanctification, the moment he trusts Christ and progressive sanctification to continue to change and grow and here's a man who is thankful for both. He's thankful for his salvation where he was sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise the moment he believed and he's thankful for ongoing progressive sanctification where he is becoming more and more like Jesus Christ each and every day. And it's on that foundation that he understands his role is to lead his wife and his children down that same path. You see, that's the way in which husbands are to love their wives and their families, to be busy about the matter of growing spiritually and then purposely and proactively helping others to do the same.

A godly man understands the place and the power of both: positional sanctification, the moment he trusts Christ and progressive sanctification to continue to change and grow and here's a man who is thankful for both.

He's thankful for his salvation where he was sealed by the Holy Spirit of promise the moment he believed and he's thankful for ongoing progressive sanctification where he is becoming more and more like Jesus Christ each and every day.

And it's on that foundation that he understands his role is to lead his wife and his children down that same path.

You see, that's the way in which husbands are to love their wives and their families, to be busy about the matter of growing spiritually and then purposely and proactively helping others to do the same.

Application for Men.

Men.

Have you placed your faith in the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ? In other words, have you been washed in the blood of the Lamb? Have you been positionally sanctified? If not, we would urge you to make that decision right now. We would invite you to place your faith and trust in Christ so you're not only a man but you're a Christian man.

If you have already done that and many of you have, then I would ask you this: as you make plans for this summer, where does the matter of your own ongoing sanctification fit into your priority structure? In other words, what books are you planning on reading this summer in order to grow? How do you intend to draw closer to Christ the summer? What are the areas that you are especially going to work on in your own progressive sanctification?

Then thirdly, man, husband, father, do you value the sanctification of your wife and your children? If so, in what specific areas...don't do this in a fuzzy way because that's not how growth works, in what specific areas and in what specific ways do you plan to lead them in the coming months?

You might need to spend some time with someone who can help you articulate that growth plan for the summer; help it become more specific if you need help with that or to provide some kind of loving accountability for you in that particular way.

Application for Women & Children

Do you really want to be loved in this way? Some people don't want to be led by anyone. Do you realize that? In fact, ladies, you might want to ask yourself, "Am I easy to be led by my husband?" Children, you might want to ask the exact same question, "Am I easy for my father to lead me?"

In fact, this is a great book to be making this point because do you realize what happened to Paul in Ephesus? Read , he was trying to provide spiritual leadership and some people became unglued. Unglued.

In fact, by the time the text is over, they're essentially with their fingers in their ears saying, "We don't want to be led spiritually by you. Great is Artemis of the Ephesians! Great is Artemis!" They are not going to let anybody lead them, at least a lead them closer to Christ.

So you ask your husband or your father or other men in the church who are responsible for whether they are providing loving principled leadership, no question about that but you have to decide if you value sanctification enough to humble yourself and be led.

Young man, you ought to ask the young lady you're dating: is there any evidence that you really want me to lead you spiritually? I'll try to do it sweetly. I'll try to do it sensitively. I'll try to do it lovingly but if you're dating a young girl and she cuts some sort of drama queen fit every time you try to lead her spiritually to the point that you're afraid to do it, break it off until you grow spiritually and she grow spiritually so that you can put together a Christian marriage. Listen, "But she so hot!" Yeah, she's going to be a hot mess. Now, I have some notes here. Maybe I ought to try to get to them.

The second characteristic we see here...

The Man of God Values Obedience.

He Seeks to Help Those Around Him Become More Like Christ

Especially in the avenue of his parenting responsibility.

This is an amazing principle that is so simple that if it were followed it would revolutionize our culture...

Ephesians 6:1 NASB95

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

What that means is that the man of God is growing in obedience himself.

Ephesians 6:1–2 NASB95

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise),

Eph

What that means is that the man of God is growing in obedience himself.

"Children, obey your parents." Boom. There it is. "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." And that means that the man of the house is growing in obedience himself and then he's leading his family to do the same. In fact, that's one of the tests of how well we're doing as a family is how carefully and how joyfully and how consistently we're obeying. Obeying the Lord. For the goal of helping everyone become more like Christ, I mean, I'm not talking for a second about being obedient so that we can be saved by our works. Of course not. This isn't just behaviorism or moralism. The goal is that each family member would be so in love with their redeeming Savior they would want to grow. They would want to become more like Christ. That's what Paul meant in verse 4 of Chapter 6, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up," the man of the house has a positive goal in mind for his family, a proactive goal in mind for his family: greater and growing Christ-likeness on the part of everyone in the family. What was one of the chief characteristics of our Savior? Obedience. Obedience. Have this attitude in yourselves which is also in Christ Jesus "who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by," what? "Becoming obedient to the point of death." What did Jesus pray in the garden? "Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done."

Perhaps some of the problems and issues in your home are a result of your lack of obedience…you cannot expect your kids to obey and please you if you are not leading the way in obeying and pleasing God.

And that means that the man of the house is growing in obedience himself and then he's leading his family to do the same. In fact, that's one of the tests of how well we're doing as a family is how carefully and how joyfully and how consistently we're obeying. Obeying the Lord. For the goal of helping everyone become more like Christ, I mean, I'm not talking for a second about being obedient so that we can be saved by our works. Of course not. This isn't just behaviorism or moralism. The goal is that each family member would be so in love with their redeeming Savior they would want to grow. They would want to become more like Christ. That's what Paul meant in verse 4 of Chapter 6, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up," the man of the house has a positive goal in mind for his family, a proactive goal in mind for his family: greater and growing Christ-likeness on the part of everyone in the family. What was one of the chief characteristics of our Savior? Obedience. Obedience. Have this attitude in yourselves which is also in Christ Jesus "who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by," what? "Becoming obedient to the point of death." What did Jesus pray in the garden? "Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done."

What is your goal in parenting? Is it to make you happy and comfortable…or is it to have them become more like Christ.

Your job is not to mold them into little images of you, but into the greater image of Jesus and they will not get there on their own…you must lead them and love them to that end.

That's what Paul meant in verse

The man of God is to have a positive goal in mind for his family, a proactive goal in mind for his family: greater and growing Christ-likeness on the part of everyone in the family.

Follow the example of Jesus who was all about obedience...Have this attitude in yourselves which is also in Christ Jesus "who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by, becoming obedient to the point of death." What did Jesus pray in the garden? "Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done."

What does this mean? When a husband and a father chooses to be obedient to the authorities in his life, he's choosing to be like Christ and when he leads and guides and expects and holds his children accountable to be obedient, he's helping them become like Christ.

Summer is here and by simply looking at the weekly attendance numbers it appears that the mindset of many believers is to take the summer off of learning and being obedient. Are you preparing your family to take the summer off from God?

If you think that you can just take a week off, a month off or even a season or years, then I am lovingly calling you a fool…you’re being foolish because you are not taking the time to understand the days in which you have been tasked to lead your family.

And for no other reason, you ought to be in the church house because it is commanded. Now, I come to church for 100 reasons more important than that but surely you want to have yourself and your family under the teaching of the word of God because God commands you to and if you're going to be a disobedient man, you cannot expect your family to be anything other than that.

In fact, we ought to understand that what we do in moderation, our children are going to do in excess and I hope will choose to be obedient men. And let the children's workers help you help your children obey.

He recognizes his dual parenting responsibility.

"in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."

Your children need to know what your goal is in parenting…to help them grow up to please and honor Christ.

that means you have to instruct them about Jesus

that means you have to measure your discipline appropriately to bring about that goal.

your job is to make sure they are growing up to be adults that don’t need our discipline anymore because they have developed biblical convictions for themselves.

It's not easy to exercise the kind of leadership we're talking about this morning and it's not easy to follow the kind of leadership that we're talking about this morning which is why it has to be done in the context of grace.

Hebrews 5:8 NASB95

Although He was a Son, He learned obedience from the things which He suffered.

How in the world could he have learned anything?" And we believe the answer is in the sense of learning experientially which means when a wife or a father or a child says to the Savior, "It's hard to obey," the response you will receive is something akin to, "I know that. I can relate to that," Jesus would say. "Have hope because in me it's possible."

Now, I realize you might say regarding obedience, "But it's so hard. My flesh wants to do the polar opposite." Well, what's our theme this year? "Finding Grace." It's not easy to exercise the kind of leadership we're talking about this morning and it's not easy to follow the kind of leadership that we're talking about this morning which is why it has to be done in the context of grace. What a great opportunity when I'm struggling as a man, when others are struggling and following that for us to join arms and draw near with confidence to the throne of grace. And what kind of Savior will we find regarding this matter of being obedient? Here's an unusual verse, , "Although He was a Son, He learned obedience from the things which He suffered." You might say, "How could that be? Jesus was omniscient. How in the world could he have learned anything?" And we believe the answer is in the sense of learning experientially which means when a wife or a father or a child says to the Savior, "It's hard to obey," the response you will receive is something akin to, "I know that. I can relate to that," Jesus would say. "Have hope because in me it's possible."

Well, one last idea from this text:

He's also a man who values honor.

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother."

The Man of God understands the importance of what we’ve been talking about here this morning.

They recognize that if young people grow up developing obedience and honor for their parents and other authorities in their life, a lot of other things are going to just naturally fall into place.

So that's why the godly man shows honor for the authorities in his life. It always starts with the example he sets. So the way he talks about his boss at work, it's honorably. The way he talks about our President, our other government officials, is with honor. The way he talks about and deals with the police and judicial authorities is with honor. The way he talks about his pastor at church is with honor.

Even in the context of disagreement, disappointment, he honors them. Why? Because he understands that the authority in his life was placed there by God himself. He understands that the example he is setting in those areas is being followed by others. As I said, he understands that what we do in moderation, others are going to do in excess so he's a man who honors the authorities in his life and then he works to create an atmosphere of honor with husband and wife in the home.

So what does that man do?

He is sure that his kids honor mom.

Can I give you some practical ways to do this?

The kids would never think about complaining about a meal.

Never. What kids are taught early on by dad is, "If mama cooked it that way, that's the way we like it today. Mom, I've been praying all morning I'd get some burnt toast. I haven't had it that way in a long time. Since yesterday. Thank you, mama. Thank you, mama." And I do think, by the way, I think it's wise every so often for a husband to say or a daddy to say to his kids not, "Don't talk to your mother that way, don't talk to my wife that way." Your kids need to understand that if mama says to take out the trash, his next words are, "Yes ma'am," and you ought to hear a pitter-patter of feet on the floor. And he knows that if I don't do it that way, the pain that I'm going to experience with daddy is not worth whatever joy I just had in being disobedient to mama. You see, daddy is creating a culture of honor for mom.

Mom is doing the same thing for dad which is why if mama got home from work first or if mama doesn't work outside the home, when daddy comes home from work, that's a high time where the kiddies are told, "Listen, get your stuff cleaned up. Dads coming home. The man of the house is about to come home. You don't want this mess here when the man of the house gets home, do you? Get yourself lined up at the front door. When daddy comes in, put that videogame down. In fact, put that in the trash before you take it out and line yourself up at the front door and you thank your daddy for working today. You thank your dad for being such a hard-working man. Thank your dad for making it possible that we can have food on our table and a roof over our head." In fact, I went to Bible college with a fellow who is a pastor today and here's the way it was in his house. His mom taught them, the sons, that when daddy comes home, you be there and you take his shoes, he was an executive at GM, you take his shoes, each son did it a different day of the week, you take his shoes back to the bedroom and you shine them and you get them ready for his next day's work as a way of honoring your father and acknowledging his great diligence in this home.

Well, so much more could be said about this but listen, it may be true that the Lord of the flies has come to Baltimore. That may be true but the Lord of heaven has come to the church, huh? And one of the many blessings that he bestows is faithful, principled men. May his tribe increase.

Would you stand with me for prayer?

Father in heaven, I thank you for words that are just so contrary to the culture in which we live. They almost sound like a foreign language anymore. But Father, thank you that they are your words and thank you for the many who are here today who would say, "And I believe it and I'm trying to live it." Lord, for any of us who would have some adjustments to make in order to get into the role that you have clearly outlined for us in your word, Lord, I pray that you would do that and thank you that you are so powerful that you have blessed this church and blessed this community with so many godly men. We pray this in Christ's name. Amen.

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