Learning to Listen
Friendology • Sermon • Submitted
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· 11 viewsLearning to Listen in order to be a good friend.
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True Friends Pay Attention
True Friends Pay Attention
True Friends Listen
True Friends Pay Attention
We must pay the most careful attention… (Hebrews 2:1a)
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A true friendship can’t happen unless you learn to listen. And you can’t learn to listen until you learn to pay attention.
You show great respect for someone when you give them your undivided attention.
The Problem- So many distractions- cell phones, social media, texting someone else. These are really just ways that we distract ourselves to deal with insecurity...
Illustration- Long distance dating.
Action point- When you are with someone- that’s the absolute most important thing.
Be present with the people right in front of you.
Put away your cell phones, stop playing fortnite, stop scrolling through instagram, listening to your music on headphones, or texting another person, when someone is right in front of you (Would you rather scroll through instagram to see what other “friends” are doing when you have real people right in front of you?
Turn your body to them, look them in the eyes, take off your headphones.
Ask questions that draw…more understanding and clarify.
True Friends Listen
True Friends Listen
…therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away. For since the message was spoken through the angels was binding, and every violation and disobedience received its just punishment, how shall we escape so great a salvation?
The Bible has a lot to say about listening.
English Standard Version Chapter 1
19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;
English Standard Version Chapter 19
20 Listen to advice and accept instruction,
that you may gain wisdom in the future.
James 1:19
There’s a big difference between listening and hearing (everyone hears things…sound waves hit eardrums every minute that you’re awake. But only a few actually listen.
English Standard Version Chapter 19
Listen to advice and accept instruction,
that you may gain wisdom in the future.
True Friends actually listen.
The problem- We are selfish. We don’t really care about what someone else has to say as much as we care about what we have to say.
We don’t really have a talk with someone to hear but to be heard. You’re not going to learn anything that way...
Illustration- Everyone can learn- Tom Purdy- Two really high profile jobs in his career. Smart, smart man. Humble. He was the most intent listener I know. He would even ask me questions as if I had something valuable to share with him. He always looked me in the eye, turned his body towards me, asked questions to clarify, and understand more. If you do that…you will gain wisdom.
“The Proverbs says a lot about hearing and it’s not talking about whether we can hear well or not or whether we have a hearing problem. It’s not an ear problem but a heart problem. Listening is a choice one has to make. We can choose to listen and then act upon that which is heard or we can listen but not really hear.” Quote from Patheos Blog.
Action Points- Don’t interrupt anyone when they’re talking. It shows that you aren’t listening and don’t care about what they have to say. Wait until they’re done talking…wait a moment…
Ask questions that draw more understanding and clarify.
Then speak.
True Friends Share Christ
True Friends Share Christ
English Standard Version Chapter 2
3 how shall we escape if we neglect such a great salvation? It was declared at first by the Lord, and it was attested to us by those who heard,
A true Friend cares about others more than themselves…that shows through their paying attention, and listening to them.
Ultimately, a true friend will share Christ with their friend.
The problem- In order to share Christ…you have to know Christ.
In order to know Christ…guess what…you have to pay attention spiritually to Christ, listen spiritually for Christ…then you will know him.
Action Points- Train yourself.
So…you see…learning to listen to others is an important spiritual discipline. It’s not something anyone is good at naturally! We all have to train ourselves to do this!
“The first service that we owe to others in the church is to listen. Just as loving God begins with listening to his Word, we can love our brothers and sisters by really listening to them. After all, God showed us his own love for us not only by speaking to us through his word, but also by listening to us. So it is God’s work that we give to our brothers and sisters when we learn to really listen to them. Most Christians, especially pastors, so often think that they must always say something important but they forget that listening can be a greater service than talking. Most people are looking for a listening ear, but they don’t find it among Christians because Christians usually talk when they should be listening. But the one who does not learn how to listen to his brother or sister doesn’t know how to listen to God either.”
True Friends Share Christ
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