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Preparing Our Children For Their Futures

Ephesians 6:1-11

Declarative Statement: The great need to prepare our children for their future.
Illustration: a deadline approaching and you realize something should have been completed in order to have everything ready for the deadline…..
Going on a trip and getting to your destination only to realize you did not pack an important item….
Arriving something and realizing that you were suppose to bring something…food, gift, etc….
Proposition: How am I personally influencing children for God?
Transitional sentence: Three vitally important responsibilities that parents and caregivers must implement if they are going to prepare children to be used by God in the future.

I. Responsibility to Establish Biblical Order in the Home- vs. 1-2

A. Choose to follow the Bible pattern- Ephesians 5:33
· God is to the head of every home
· Husband/father to lead the home as God directs
· Wife/mother to submit to the husband’s leadership
· Children are to obey God and both parents
B. Children obey your parents-vs. 1
Note-children will follow the wives pattern in following and submitting to the husband/father’s leadership.
Note- John R. Rice- “the best way to get rid of criminals is to stop raising them.”
1. Establish some clear boundaries
Proverbs 1:8
8- My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother:
Proverbs 6:20
20- My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother:
2. Expect immediate obedience
Genesis 37:13
13- And Israel said unto Joseph, Do not thy brethren feed the flock in Shechem? come, and I will send thee unto them. And he said to him, Here am I.
3. Eliminate unnecessary rules
4. Exemplify Godly lives:
Proverbs 23:26
26- My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.
Abraham Lincoln- “If a man will ‘train up a child in the way he should go’, he must first walk that way himself.”
C. Children honour your parents-vs. 2
1. In the 10 commandments this one is #5 and follows the first four that dealt with man’s relationship with God. The very first command that deals with man’s relationship with other men instructs all to “honour their father and mother”.
2. According the Word of God, a man cannot be right with God if he is wrong with his parents!!!
3. Honour is based upon respect and obedience.
4. There will come a time when the child becomes an adult and self-supporting….it is during this transition that obedience to parents is somewhat replaced by honoring one’s parents.
I may no longer be required to obey my parents but according to the Bible I must always honor my parents!!!
5. Note the promise associated with this command-vs. 3

II. Responsibility to Encourage children in the home- vs. 4

Note- discipline for 2 things- direct disobedience and bad attitude.
Example- we don’t discipline a child if they break a glass/window/door/window/toy if it was not the result of direct disobedience (don’t play with/touch that) or a bad attitude (throwing an object out of anger, etc.)
Suppose kids are throwing a baseball and it slips and knocks out your car window/dents the car. No discipline is needed unless they were told previously not to throw the ball by the car or they did it out of rebellion!!! You say…’well they should have known better’, yes they should have if you have taken time to teach them!!!!
A. Role of the father
1. Protect
2. Provide
3. Promote
4. Pronounce
5. Pursue- the hearts of our children
Proverbs 23:26
26- My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.
6. Purchase (lol)
B. Relationships in the home-“provoke not”
Note- provoke not=do not exasperate
Note- an author stated- the average father has 2.7 encounters with each child averaging 15 SECONDS each day!!!!
Matthew Henry-“Do not provoke your children to wrath. Though God has given you power, you must not abuse that power, remembering that your children are, in a particular manner, pieces of yourselves, and therefore ought to be governed with great tenderness and love. Be not impatient with them, use no unreasonable severities and lay no rigid injunctions upon them. When you caution them, when you counsel them, when you reprove them, do it in such a manner as not to provoke them to wrath. In all such cases deal prudently and wisely with them, endeavoring to convince their judgments and to work upon their reason.”
Note-words are powerful and when spoken from an authority figure they are that much more powerful.
1. Words that are used-
Ephesians 4:32
32- And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
2. Methods that are employed
Verbal-praising and not criticizing
Non-verbal-caring and giving attention
C. Realization of purpose-“nurture/admonition”
1. Nurture-“what to do”
· Instruct-takes time, wisdom and consistency.
Ephesians 5:16-17
16- Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
17- Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.
Proverbs 29:15
15- The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
“Wisdom to know when to use reproof and when to use the rod.”
1 Samuel 3:13
13- For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not.
· Educate- process of education that involves loving discipline.
2. Admonition- “what not to do”
Deuteronomy 6:6-7
6- And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:
7- And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

III. Responsibility to Equip Children in the Home- vs. 5-11

A. Servant’s Heart- vs. 5-8
Note-servant/master is the same as employee/employer or volunteer/leader system.
1. Adults will have an impossible time following leadership outside the home if they were never taught to follow leadership in the home!!!
2. It all begins with the heart:
· Saved by God-
Acts 8:36-37
36- And as they went on their way, they came unto a certain water: and the eunuch said, See, here is water; what doth hinder me to be baptized?
37- And Philip said, If thou believest with all thine heart, thou mayest. And he answered and said, I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God.
· Surrendered to God
Psalms 40:8
8- I delight to do thy will, O my God: yea, thy law is within my heart.
Matthew 5:8
8- Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.
· Sought out by parents
Proverbs 23:26
26- My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.
· Serving others
Proverbs 4:23
23- Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.
B. Successful leaders- vs. 9
1. Never be a good leader until you first seek to be a good follower. “There are some that cannot lead, yet refuse to follow.” This type of person is frustrated and frustrates all those around them…they normally are critics and scorners!!!
2. A leader treats others with respect and kindness.
3. A leader realizes that his service is to the Lord and he is doing the will of God.
C. Spiritual warfare- vs. 10-11
4 things we want to help our children understand, accept and believe:
1. The greatest danger is always the flesh.
2. The gospel is always the answer.
3. God’s glory is always the goal.
4. God Himself is always enough.


How are you doing in this area of influencing children/teens/others to be used of God?
Does your home have a distinct Biblical order to it?
Are you actively encouraging those in your home for the things of God?
“Who is a Christian or a stronger Christian because of your influence?”
Dads-what kind of words are you using?
Moms-what kind of words are you using?
Can you say that your children are equipped for the Spiritual warfare that they are facing and will face?
One of the best ways to equip them is to make sure that they are in church every time the doors are open!!!!
No activity or event is more important than church!!!!!
Are you preparing for the future?
Christian growth?
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