The Pearl and The Pig

mabcd

have something for my hands to do this morning. How's that? Can you hear me? Alright? Will say it again. Good morning church. It is good to see all of you here with us. If you're visiting with us. It's good to see you here this morning. We are going to just jump right into the words of Jesus this morning and get started. Jesus says in Matthew chapter 7 verse 6 do not give dogs. What is sacred do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do they may trample them under their feet and turn and tear you to pieces. What is Jesus saying here? It's Jesus saying that there are certain people in this world certain people who look differently than us who believe differently than us who aren't Christians certain people who aren't worthy of the good message or the wisdom or the things that we have are there certain people in this world who are considered pigs or dogs unlike us who have great wisdom and we aren't supposed to help those people because they just are not worthy of it and they're not going to receive it anyway, so don't waste your time. Is that what Jesus is saying? If you just take this verse on its own if you take it out of the context and see what Jesus is actually talking about. It sounds like what Jesus is saying? But does that really square with the rest of Jesus message? It doesn't sound very Jesus e does it I mean if you were to for example take just a survey of the world and you were saying here on one side or all the good people on the world and here on the other side are all the bad people. Which side would you be on? What side would I be on when we all be in this broken messed up sinful category not all single one of us has our life together is that Bible says all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. And if that's what Jesus was saying and Jesus is the good he is the plural he is the truth. The pearl of great price is he called and scripture there would have been a waste of time for him to be cast into the midst of Sinners Like You and Me. Jesus never ever ever said that there are certain people that you are not to help. Because Jesus actually said that it's for the sinful messed up people the broken people that he actually came. Look at what it says in Matthew 9 verse where Jesus said is not the healthy who need a doctor but the sick Jesus never said you should not do good for people because they might miss use or abuse the things that you are doing because Jesus himself said this in Matthew Chapter 5. He said I tell you love your enemies and pray for those who what who persecutes you that you may be children of your father in Heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.

Jesus is not saying that there are certain classes of people here that you should not help whether they are of a different religion a different denomination. Maybe they don't believe like you may be A different race or different sexual orientation or delivered different political party, whatever there might be. Jesus is not giving Christians and excuse to wall up and say, I'm sorry, I don't have anything for you because you are a pig you are a dog. That is not what this passage is saying. Before a long time I thought that's what it was saying in a few months ago. I heard a message but I got him John ortberg and he can open my eyes to some things that I hadn't seen and I want to share a little bit of what he said with you this morning because I think when you really get what Jesus is saying, it can be really life-changing for the kind of people that we as Christians are supposed to be You say it's very important when you read scripture to read in context. You can't just let the verse out and say okay. Here's what this mean separate it from everything else that Jesus is saying because it Matthew chapter 7 The Sermon on the Mount this passage where it where this verse takes place. Jesus is talking about religious people. And he's talking about some of the harmful ways that religious people tend to relate to non-religious people. Matthew chapter 7 verse 1. He says this do not judge or you too will be judged and other words. Jesus is saying it is not your job as a Christian to go around telling everybody how sinful they are. It's not your job. It's not your job to fix other people. It's not your job to go around and condemn other people because did Jesus go around doing that. You didn't go around doing that. It says the son of the man came not to condemn the world, but to save the world through him Jesus responded to people Sinners with grace and mercy a religious people tend not to do that. We tend to be judgmental. We tend to be fault-finding. So Jesus continues in Matthew chapter 7 verse 3, and he says, why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye. He says you how can you say to your brother? Let me take the speck out of your eye when all the time there is a plank in your own eye. He said don't spend your time focusing on everybody else's problems. Cuz if you do you're going to find them. It's true. But you can also miss the big problem that is going on in your own life and your own heart. Being this kind of judgmental fault-finding kind of person. And inverse 6. Jesus is continuing this same idea this same idea. A religious people mistreating or treating badly people who don't look at or believe like they do. So when he says after this don't give to dogs. What is sacred don't give your pearls to swine. He's actually giving us a very helpful relational practice or idea. That can help. I can help us to save maintain and strengthen friendships save maintain and strengthen our marriage same as save maintain to strengthen our relationship with our parents are our kids any kind of relationship. What Jesus is trying to do is he's trying to help us understand the kind of people that we should be there's a practice that Jesus is trying to discourage in Christian. And that is the practice we can call it Pearl pushing. The idea of pearl pushing is taking your wisdom your Superior knowledge your will your your better lifestyle? And trying to force that on somebody else, even when that action of forcing is not wanted. Nor is it helpful to tell your story? About I guess it's probably about 8 years ago and now 89 years ago before I was in Ministry. A friend of mine had come to town to visit that I hadn't seen him since high school. And so we decided that we were going to go to Dairy Queen and we're going to sit outside. We're going to get an ice cream cone. We're just going to sit and chat and have a good time. It's a while. We're sitting there and where we're talkin. We kind of hear this commotion going on inside Dairy Queen and is a young guy there who just really excited about Jesus and there's nothing wrong with being really excited about Jesus. Okay? I'm not not saying that But he's going from table to table to table and he is Holy Ghost preaching to everybody.

And we can't we kind of see this and in some people are getting up and leaving and then some people are responding well and so he gets it gets even more excited and he comes outside and we're sitting there were in the middle of a conversation. He doesn't say, excuse me. He doesn't say anything you just walks up and start unloading Bible knowledge on us and I got to tell you I probably agreed with everything that he said, I don't remember everything that he said, but I probably agreed with 90% of it. But was that the time or the place for that? It didn't make me feel good. It didn't make me feel uplifted. It it kind of struck me as kind of rude. You think there's a time and a place there's a way that we can present truth to other people. There's a way that we can do it. That's helpful. There's a way that we can do it. That is harmful. And sometimes we don't see the difference. Sometimes we look for faults and two other people so much that we will we will just give him another Pearl in another Pearl in another Pearl in another Pearl. But the thing is is up that Pearl is not really the problem stuff in the pigs are Unworthy of pearls. It's that a pearl is not a helpful thing to give to a pig does that make sense? You think very cute pigs wear pearls? I mean this one right here behind me, isn't it looks really cute and adorable doesn't it? But but most pigs don't wear pearls. You know, what what what makes pigs Happy Food slop, you know, something like that that's going to make a pig happy, you know love on that pic. Give that pig what it needs if I give a dog and I take that dog and I'll give it a new testament. Something sacred, right? Is that dog going to be able to process or understand that but I can keep giving a new test. It's all over now. There's probably not going to cheer him up and then tear him up and it spit him out right sometimes when we aren't understanding of the people that were talking to when we don't really consider them at all. But we're just trying to justify make our own sales our own opinions right in the eyes of ourselves or others. We can tend to press in a little bit too hard we can tend to speak when it's not the right time the best time to pass on our wisdom or our knowledge the right or sell them in the Book of Proverbs. He says this if if a person blesses his neighbor too loudly in the morning And that person that neighbor is going to take it as a curse. Why does the pig wants to sleep and yet this person is blessing them very loudly right in that moment. I felt like I was being treated like a pig when that preacher was just unleashing the Bible on me, even though the things that he say, we're probably good. But the pig just wanted to have a conversation with his friend that he hadn't seen in a long time. It was not the time or the place. AC Pro pushing doesn't just happen in these random moments Pearl pushing actually happens every single day with every single relationship that you have it can happen in a marriage. I heard a preacher tell a story about this woman who loved Jesus You see the Pearl doesn't have to be something bad. The Pearl can be genuinely good wisdom. The Pearl can be genuinely good knowledge. The Pearl may even be the Gospel of Jesus Christ himself. She had a husband who did not believe she loves Jesus. It's a good thing. She wanted her husband to believe and that is a very good thing. But the way she went about it was not helpful. She kept on pressing every single day here. Listen to this Godly podcast here read this book about 5 proof that God exists here do this do that. The other do this keep pushing. Here's another Pearl. He's another Pearl every day. She would tell her husband. I'm praying for you with a smile. How do you think I made him feel every single day there were days when they would be at the dinner table and she would be praying for Jesus to save her husband while he's food was sitting there getting cold. The pig was not happy about this another Pearl another Pearl another Pearl.

Pro push and can happen in relationships like a marriage probation can happen in friendships Pearl pushing can happen in. any relationship but one of the ways that I see Pro pushing in my own life. I'm one of the ways that God is kind of challenge me. In my own Pro Fishing ways.

Is a relationship between a parent. and her children

Doesn't be her parents, you know that being a parent is a very heavy weight and responsibilities and it doesn't matter what age your kids are. It doesn't matter whether they're young or if they're they're old and out of the house. You worry about your kids. And you think now you know, I'm a I'm a parent now and and now I've got to make sure that everything goes perfect in my child's life. And so for the longest time you pick what they they wear in the evening and you make sure that you got all the friends and people to hang out with you guard the movies that they see in the things that they here and you try to do all of these things because you know what it's dangerous world out there and you want for your kids to be be good.

And you think that if you can only give your kids just the right thing the perfect amount of this and that and the other than they are going to just turn out incredible.

The problem is that those kids disappoint you from time to time. Don't they? And those kids act up from time to time don't they?

and those kids who are able to make A's in school sometimes come home with B's and C's and D's.

What do you do as a parent in these moments?

The reason I'm talking about this and we're going to spend some time in the next few weeks talking about the relationship between parents and children will talk about it both ways because I send out a request for prayer. What can I pray for you for? The number one request that I get is is please help me, you know pray that I raise these kids.

Parents you care about your kids and you love them and you want to help them.

but sometimes we have got to give us wisdom on this. Sometimes the help that we give can do more harm than good.

Why can't you be more like your brother or sister?

Why do you disappoint me? Why did you make this gray when you could have made this grade? Why this why that are the other sit up straight chew with your mouth closed do this do that. The other harping harping harping have another Pearl have another Pearl have another Pearl. We all do it to a certain extent into a certain extent. It's good, but at some point doesn't it get too much doesn't begin to alienate the relationship between you and your child.

the way your child doesn't want to tell you if they made a bad grade because they feel like Once again, you're something else that you're going to be disappointed in them the pigs.

are not happy

about your disappointment

and all of a sudden parenting instead of becoming a joy becomes a bird instead of a close relationship. It starts to push these kids. Hawaii And whether you say these things out loud or do these things?

implicitly

I guarantee you that your kids understand.

I don't understand.

Cuz I do it to her all the time.

I'm not saying that you shouldn't have rules. I'm not saying that you shouldn't set boundaries. I'm not saying that you shouldn't have discipline and enforce consequences. Those things are important in those things that that parents should do.

But when Jesus is encouraging us to do in our relationships is to approach them from a a stance of grace and mercy rather than one of judgment. And that is something that can sew help our relationship with our kids.

There may be no thing nothing more painful to a Christian parent.

Can a kid who reject the Faith from which they were raised? and walks away

and I know that there are examples of that around this room. I've talked to several of you who there's nothing more painful than for a parent who Jesus is the greatest treasure in their life and yet they want their kids show much to believe that they give them Pearl after Pearl after Pearl. And how many of you how many of you when you were growing up you just wish that your parents are giving you more lectures growing up or how many of you knew exactly what your parents were going to say before they even said it you knew what your parents thought about it you knew.

How can we? How can we ensure that our kids are going to grow up and be Christians. Guess what you can't

you can't

and I know that that's scary. Because that means that you have to let go of some control over your kid. I know that's scary because that means that you have to you have to actually trust God and make room for him to work into their last. Guess what he's better at that than you are.

He is.

UC You cannot fix anyone.

You cannot save. anyone You cannot change anyone on your own? Only God can do that only God can touch a person at that deep level and it's something that we all rely on him to do. That's what God has called me into the ministry and I understand that I'm sitting up here and talk all day long. But if that's not working if he's not if he's not taking these words that I say and and using them to open up people's hearts and change them than that. I'm just wasting my time up here. This is something that only God can do.

And as parents at the scary thing, but it is the only thing. That will actually work to change child's life. One of the things that I'm starting to understand as a parent and one of the reasons why Community like this is so important. is because There comes a time and is it starting in my oldest? And I'm sure is if she gets older and becomes a teenager it's going to be even worse but there comes a time when as a parent your kids really don't want your pearls anymore. But they might accept somebody else's Pearls of Wisdom.

Have you ever had that experience where you've been telling your kids something over and over and over again? And then you find out that they they do that thing and and you're proud of them. It's like finally you've listened and it's like turns out yes, I would so somebody else said that I should do this exact same thing that you've been telling me to experience. Actually Tony Dungy, if you know anything about football Tony dungy's a super bowl-winning coach for Indianapolis Colts, I believe this is who he was 4 and any any coach who can win a Superbowl in my book is a coach who knows what he's doing his son was playing High School football in every single day. He was waking up he was going to practice he was expending a lot of energy, but all he was eating for breakfast was a Pop-Tart now, I like Pop-Tarts but can we say that they're probably not the best nutrition in the world. Okay. So here he was and he was wearing himself out. He wasn't feeling his body the right way. It's a Tony. This this Rockstar Super Bowl winning football coach NFL football coach. And he goes and he begins to talk to his his son about nutrition and all these things day after day after day. Here's another Pearl. Here's another Pearl who's another Pearl you take this and you do this and and if you delete this and it's like nothing, but he wasn't listening to it at all every day to another Pop Tart another Pop Tart another Pop Tart and I was just getting under his skin and one day he walks down the stairs and he sees his son making this great breakfast. I mean bacon eggs sausage oatmeal and fruit and he's like Alright you really feeling up today buddy? And he's like, I guess something that I said, you're really got to him. He said yeah Mike my coach said I needed to eat better in the mornings.

His dad is a super bowl-winning NFL coaching yet. He listens to a high school coach.

Because to him his dad is just Dad.

And all and at some point you lecture enough and it just going to be white noise, and there's going to stop listening. That's not what any of us wants is it?

It's really important. As I said, I don't want to get personal at this church for a minute. It's important. We got a lot of kids around here.

Talking to Rick and conversations and things that studies that they're done. You know, you you say with our youth in and I don't know if you've been here on Wednesday night. If you haven't you should, it's a lot of fun. It's it's chaotic but it's a lot of fun. We have tons and tons of kids who come from the surrounding community and they're not so we have over a hundred kids here and I'll all different age groups. It's it's pretty incredible.

What to do that in order to administer these kids we got lots of volunteers and lots of people who are stepping in to delete small group discussions and teach classes. And if you do that and just let us know we are so thankful for all of you because I know that our times it's hectic some of these kids some of these kids don't grow up in church family. They don't know how to behave they don't know how to act. I know sometimes it's really hard to get through your class and make sure that they are where they need to be but the work that you're doing is so important not only for these kids are coming before our own kids who are here you see people have done studies will let you know. We really want about one use volunteer to for every five kids and and we are a little short of that on Wednesday night's boat but not very much and we we we have a lot of people here everybody jumps in and helps and it's wonderful. The people who have done research into Faith development for young people will say no but really you want to flip that the best single predictor of a child growing up and maintaining their faith in Jesus even into adulthood is that they had five role modelz five people at least 5 people in their life who were active and engaging it's not just Mom and Dad maybe parents maybe or maybe grandparents may be Aunts Uncles maybe people in the church Community it takes everybody to go in and form because when Mom and Dad stop making sense and we will sometimes and Pete and kids. Listen to Mom and Dad. Maybe they can go to a Nook or maybe they can go to your friend at church or maybe they can go to somebody else. That's why it's important that we all work together to raise his kid and inform their faith and said those of you who who do that. Thank you so much because that can really help nurture the faith in all of these kids, which is exactly what we want to do. That's one of the things that we care about is as our children what we're doing VBS still that's why we're doing all of these things. That's why we Trying to make space in our new building if you check that out in the back for all of these kids, but we want to be a place where we share. the message Jesus we want to be a place where we show love and mercy and Grace to everyone.

And not just push these things down people's throats because here's the problem.

When you are a pearl Pusher you tend to push people away from the Pearl and from you.

It's a Jesus is trying to encourage us to look at our relationships differently. Here's here's what I would say. It's just the bottom line of all of this is Jesus would say don't try to fix people don't make that your goal no matter whether it's somebody in your own household somebody that you work with somebody else out outside. Don't try to fix people love them show them mercy and Grace share your pearls with them. Sure. I'm not trying to tell anybody don't talk about Jesus because we should I'm not trying to tell anybody don't teach your kids because you should

but be careful the way that you do it do it in a loving gracious way. And if they are not responding if they are turning away if they are running change tactics because maybe it's not the Pearl that you're giving maybe it's the way that you're giving it and I'll finish this way with the story that I told him in before some of you may have heard it and then then we'll be done because I sing it it just perfectly captures everything that we said. It's a story about an old woman who lived alone with her Yorkshire Terrier a dog named patches the everyday Margaret would go to drawer and she would get out a spoon and a bottle of castor oil for her dog patch just because somebody had convinced her someday that if you give a Yorkshire Terrier Yorkie you give one of these dogs a spoonful of castor oil every single day and it will have a very nice shiny coat will be the healthiest dog happiest dog in the world. The problem is every time the dog heard the spoon drawer rattle it ran and it did. Because it did not like to take the castor oil and it knew what was coming. So everyday Margaret had a fight on her hands. She would run and she had to find the dog and have to dig it out from under the bed or under a couch or behind the sink or somewhere like that. Jack it out. Hold it down on its back get the spoonful of castor oil pour it down the dog's throat by holding the mouth open. We just kick and scream and fight all the time and it was just a pain every single that she didn't look forward to it. The dog didn't look forward to it. Everybody was completely miserable anybody ever been there trying to work on somebody else I have

but one day patches delivered this amazing kick right as she was trying to hold the dog down. And she kicked the bottle of castor oil out of Margaret hand onto the floor castor oil went everywhere and so frustrated she stands up. It should go to the kitchen. She gets some paper towels and some rags to go and clean up the mess and she comes back and she looks and she just last because there is patches and he's sitting there licking the castor oil off the floor. Like it's just delicious. It looks like the best thing that the dog has ever eaten in its life and she laughed because in that moment she understood completely patches like castor oil, but he did not like having it shoved down his throat every single day. And I'm asking you to consider in your relationships.

The difference between Pearl pushing and offering your Pearls of Wisdom the difference between hurting and helping. Some of you know the Bible and you love the Bible, but there's a difference between teaching the Bible and teaching people the Bible. There's a difference between teaching the Bible and using the Bible helpfully. to change lives

because we can all memorize and throw around scriptures. But love requires us to consider. What does this person actually need to hear. Love requires us to consider what's going to be helpful in this situation love requires us to not be a fault finder. the push people away

But it requires us. to help dessert I got. in all the ways that we can

You staying with me?

Mac is going to come up is going to lead us in one more song If you're here today, and you need prayer for anything and bite you to come forward. If you're here, and it doesn't have to be related to what I said, but you have a need you have something that you would like to share. I got you to come forward just consider these words of Jesus this week consider all of your relationships and and how we can better follow the wisdom that Jesus has given us. I promise you that it can make a difference to make a difference. It's already starting to make a difference in my own relationship with my daughter and I hope that that that will continue. Then love you church. Thank you so much for being here. Hope you have a great week. May the Lord bless and keep you.