Dealing With an Angry Child

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Parenting 101

Dealing with an Angry Child

Ecclesiastes 7:9 KJV 1900
Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.

A violent passion of the mind excited by a real or supposed injury; usually accompanied with a propensity to take vengeance, or to obtain satisfaction from the offending party

A child should be disciplined for two things:

Direct disobedience
A bad attitude

I. General information and commandments about this sin:

Proverbs 22:24 KJV 1900
Make no friendship with an angry man; And with a furious man thou shalt not go:
pro 22.245
Do not allow your child to develop friendships with children who are quick to anger.
Proverbs 14:29 KJV 1900
He that is slow to wrath is of great understanding: But he that is hasty of spirit exalteth folly.
An angry man demonstrates his foolishness for all to see.
Ephesians 4:26 KJV 1900
Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:
Ephesians 4:31–32 KJV 1900
Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.
James 1:20 KJV 1900
For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.
What does anger accomplish?
Note the consequences of the child's angry actions and discuss them together.

II. What happens, or should happen to an angry person:

A. An angry person is brought to shame:
Proverbs 25:8 KJV 1900
Go not forth hastily to strive, Lest thou know not what to do in the end thereof, When thy neighbour hath put thee to shame.
Learn to discipline an angry child. Stop him in the middle of his outburst, remove him from the situation. Require confession and asking of forgiveness.
Learn to discipline an angry child. Stop him in the middle of his outburst, remove him from the situation. Require confession and asking of forgiveness.
B. An angry person stirs up strife.
Proverbs 15:18 KJV 1900
A wrathful man stirreth up strife: But he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife.
Remove the angry person and discipline. If he is allowed to continually express his anger without consequence, he will destroy the peace of the entire household.
C. An angry person will suffer punishment.
Proverbs 19:19 KJV 1900
A man of great wrath shall suffer punishment: For if thou deliver him, yet thou must do it again.
Be consistent and always disciplining an angry child. Start with the temper tantrums typical of the young toddler whose desires are thwarted. We can't overlook these outbursts, considering them simply a "stage" he is going through. He would just graduate to another "stage" of uncontrolled anger as he grows older, unless he is taught to control is anger and forfeit his "rights."

III. To what is the angry man compared:

A. A city without walls.
Proverbs 25:28 KJV 1900
He that hath no rule over his own spirit Is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.
A city without walls is unprotected, without resistance to the enemy (temptation). A city without walls is vulnerable to attack.
B. Anger is heavier than stone or sand.
Proverbs 27:3 KJV 1900
A stone is heavy, and the sand weighty; But a fool’s wrath is heavier than them both.
Fill a bucket with sand or rocks, and have the child it around for a while.
Proverbs 27:4 KJV 1900
Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous; But who is able to stand before envy?
C. Anger is like water gushing over a dam.
Proverbs 17:14 KJV 1900
The beginning of strife is as when one letteth out water: Therefore leave off contention, before it be meddled with.
With sand or mud, construct a network of a creek and a dam. Flood with a hose or a bucket of water. Let the child note what happens when the water begins to go over the dam and how destructive it is.

IV. Blessings of the man with self-control:

A. It is an honor to cease from strife.
Proverbs 20:3 KJV 1900
It is an honour for a man to cease from strife: But every fool will be meddling.
For the child who is learning to control his temper, pretty present him with something special such as a medal of honor, a certificate or maybe a homemade patch on his coat.
To cease from strife requires humility, and in it states that the humble shall be exalted. Find some way to honor or exalt the child that is winning the victory over anger.
B. Will inherit the earth.
Psalm 37:9 KJV 1900
For evildoers shall be cut off: But those that wait upon the Lord, they shall inherit the earth.
Make a special deposit into the child's long-term savings.
Make it clear to your child that his share of the family inheritance is contingent upon him demonstrating self-control in the control of his anger.

V. Stories that illustrate the consequences of anger.

A. Cain-Genesis 4:5-Led to murder.
B. Moses-Exodus 20:10-Struck the rock, kept from the Promised Land.
C. Nebuchadnezzer-Daniel 3:13-19-Attempted to murder Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.
D. Esau-Genesis 27:45-planned to murder Jacob.

VI. Verses to memorize:

pr 14.
Proverbs 14:17 KJV 1900
He that is soon angry dealeth foolishly: And a man of wicked devices is hated.
Proverbs 16:23 KJV 1900
The heart of the wise teacheth his mouth, And addeth learning to his lips.
Proverbs 16:32 KJV 1900
He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; And he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.
pr
Proverbs 17:27 KJV 1900
He that hath knowledge spareth his words: And a man of understanding is of an excellent spirit.
Proverbs 19:11 KJV 1900
The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; And it is his glory to pass over a transgression.
pr
Proverbs 21:23 KJV 1900
Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue Keepeth his soul from troubles.
Proverbs 21:23 KJV 1900
Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue Keepeth his soul from troubles.
ps
Psalm 141:3 KJV 1900
Set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth; Keep the door of my lips.
John 13:35 KJV 1900
By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
John 13:35 KJV 1900
By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
1 Corinthians 13:4–5 KJV 1900
Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
1 cor 13.45
Galatians 5:22 KJV 1900
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
Philippians 4:8 KJV 1900
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Conclusion:

Be consistent with your punishment.
Don’t discipline when you are angry. Remember we cannot expect our children to do something we are not doing.
Teach your children how to behave, don’t expect the school, Sunday school, daycare, etc. to do it. It is your responsibility.
Remember: discipline for bad attitude and direct disobedience.
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