A Heart of Modesty

I will be speaking on the subject of modesty. This is an important topic that affects EVERY person here in some way. There are so many ways to approach this subject, and I have been praying that the way I approach this subject will be given in a way that shows my love and my concern for everyone here. We would hopefully all agree that every one of us MUST dress modestly and godly at all times. The challenge about this topic is the application of the teaching on the subject. How do you and incorporate these things into our lives. I have been prayerful that this lesson would be helpful in getting everyone here to see what the heart of this issue really is.

Ladies, in this lesson I am primarily addressing you, but there are applications to the men here also, because sadly in this world, men are becoming increasingly immodest in their dress. We all need to think about what we wear and the affect it will have on others. But it is true that the scriptures speak about this topic primarily as a concern for women. So out of my concern for you, ladies, I am going to attempt to address this topic. I only ask that you work hard in trying to apply this lesson to yourself; to your own heart and life. Don’t try to apply this lesson to someone else, but to yourself.

So from our text in , plan on dealing with 3 points:

· Attitude of the modest women

· Appearance of the modest woman

· Allegiance of the modest woman

The Attitude/Heart of the modest woman

Any biblical discussion on the issue of modesty needs to begin with the heart, not where the hemline is on your clothes. The emphasis on the heart is clear in this passage. In verse 9, Paul says, “women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control.” Her appearance is mentioned first (which we will talk about in the next point), but her motive, how she needs to adorn herself is given in the second part of this verse: “with modesty and self-control.” All respectful and proper clothing comes from a heart that desires those things; a heart that wants to be modest. Ladies, your clothing is a public declaration of what is, or is not going on in your heart. If you desire to be godly and respectable in your dress, your motivation will be to be different from our culture when it comes to appearance and dress and fashion. Your dress needs to be motivated by modesty and self-control.

Let’s look at these 2 words for a moment:

First: modesty, or propriety depending on your translation. This is talking about avoiding clothing that is going to bring attention to yourself. Is it extravagant? Is it showy? Is it revealing or sexually enticing? Immodesty is so much more than wearing a low cut shirt or dress! Immodesty is all about drawing undue attention to yourself. What is the Biblical term that speaks of someone that wants to bring attention to themselves instead of the Lord? The term is pride, or arrogance. I heard a really good quote when I was preparing for this lesson that said “Modesty is humility expressed in the way we dress.” Wearing immodest clothing shows a heart that is too focused on self, and not enough on God and how what we wear affects others. Modesty is humility expressed in the way we dress. It shows that you have a desire to serve others, particularly the men, when you get dressed in the morning. It shows that you are not thinking of promoting yourself. Modesty shows that you do not want to provoke sensuality or lust. This is what modesty is ALL about.

But I want to throw this out there so I am not misunderstood. I am not saying that every woman that dresses immodestly has a problem with pride and wants guys to notice them by wearing revealing clothing. It may be the case (and may be in a good number of cases) that you just don’t understand how your clothing affects men. Many women may not be aware of how their dress affects other men, but it is so important to be considerate of your brothers in Christ and helping them stay strong in the Lord. Please remember the admonition of the Lord: “Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea.” You have the responsibility ladies to put some effort into making sure that you do not cause any of your brothers to stumble. You can help us or cause us to stumble. Many men would agree with me when I say that this world is a minefield for us! We struggle so much with lust, with sexual temptation, with temptations to look at pornography, and so on. And it can be so discouraging that even at the one place we expect to not have these kinds of temptations, among God’s people; at times can also be a minefield. Women in the church can be a distraction and a stumbling block by their dress or lack of it.

Self-control- your translation may say “discretion, sobriety, or moderation.” The idea is this: What kind of restraint are you showing in what you are wearing? When we look at the women in this world, I am sure we would agree that not much restraint is used at all! The Greek word can also mean “sanity.” I like this definition, because as I walk around on my college campus, I think that some women are just crazy for what they put on! For godly women, what you wear should show others around you that you have set boundaries for yourself!

Modesty and self control are obviously not what clothing designers are thinking about when they make the latest clothing and fashions, but ladies, you need to think about it. A heart of modesty and self control are clearly seen in the godly woman, and it shows in her dress.

APPLICATION QUESTIONS: Here are some questions that you need to ask yourself in the area of modesty and self control:

· What statement do your clothes make about your heart? There is an inseparable relationship between the two.

· As you shop for clothes, are you thinking about modesty and self-control? Do you take the Lord to the store with you?

· In choosing clothing to put on in the morning, whose attention and approval do you desire?

The Appearance of the modest woman

“women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire”

Paul in the context of this verse is showing us that God wants there to be no distractions whatsoever to the teaching of God’s word in the world and to our service and worship of God in general, not just in our worship assemblies. The men are not to bring disruption through attitudes of anger and quarreling, and the women are not to bring distraction due to their dress. In this text, it seems that the women were overdressing to identify themselves as one who is rich and in so doing separate themselves from the poorer brethren. The issue here is not wearing these things, but why they were wearing these things. They were bringing attention to themselves through worldly means instead of spiritual means. They were associating themselves with the world instead of the Lord with these attitudes. Who inspires your dress? Who are you identifying yourselves with? It is unfortunate that the world has an impact on Christian women in this way.

"Do not let your adornment be merely outward--arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel-- 4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God."

When men, women, and especially God looks at you, what do you want them to see? How you look outwardly or inwardly? Do they see too much skin, or godliness and good works? When people look at you, they need to see Christ living in you! They should see someone who is a servant, someone that is faithful in encouraging their brethren and the lost, someone that is full of love and compassion for others. But this may not be the case if you are dressed in immodest clothing. I can speak from experience that it is hard to look at a Christian that is immodest in their dress and to look at them as a sister.

APPLICATION QUESTIONS:

· Was there a man today that desired to come and worship God, but was distracted by what your clothing and your body?

· How often do you allow others to evaluate your clothing (your father, husband, or other godly women)?

· Is there someone you need to show concern for when it comes to their clothing, a particular outfit?

· Are you noticed more for your clothing or for your good works? What is more eye-catching about you, your clothing or your character?

Allegiance of the Modest Woman

What do you think it is that is motivating Paul to write these things to the church? The answer lies in verses 1-7 of this chapter. Let’s not separate verses 8-12 from the other things that Paul says in the chapter. The reason why Paul commands men to be without anger and quarreling and women to be respectful and modest in their dress is: the GOSPEL. It is all about the gospel!

“This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior, 4 who desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth. 5 For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus, 6 who gave himself as a ransom for all, which is the testimony given at the proper time. “

This is the godly man and woman’s concern. Your attitude, your conduct, and your dress show your allegiance or lack of it to the gospel, to Christ, to His sacrifice for you! Our approach towards modesty and any other biblical subject is all about the gospel and how we reflect upon it. The godly woman avoids immodesty because she does not want to be a distraction at any time or to reflect badly at any time on the gospel. You ladies are to be different from the world. You are to not be a distraction to the lost and saved alike by revealing too much skin that should not be on display. You are to be in the world, but not of the world in your dress so that in all things you can bring glory to God.

“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. 32 Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God-- 33 even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved.”

APPLICATION QUESTIONS:

· How do you reflect the glorious light of the gospel to others?

· Has the gospel transformed your heart, your apparel, and your works?

· If it hasn’t, it has the power to do so!

Related Media

Related Sermons

A Heart of Modesty

​