Forgiveness: The Hardest Part

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Sometimes the hardest part of forgiviness is forgiving ourselves for our failures and sins.

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Forgiveness: The Hardest Part
Text: Psalm 103:1–14 (NLT)
Psalm 103:1–14 NLT
Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle’s! The Lord gives righteousness and justice to all who are treated unfairly. He revealed his character to Moses and his deeds to the people of Israel. The Lord is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. He will not constantly accuse us, nor remain angry forever. He does not punish us for all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve. For his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth. He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west. The Lord is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him. For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust.
1 Let all that I am praise the Lord;
with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name.
2 Let all that I am praise the Lord;
may I never forget the good things he does for me.
3 He forgives all my sins
and heals all my diseases.
4 He redeems me from death
and crowns me with love and tender mercies.
5 He fills my life with good things.
My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!
6 The Lord gives righteousness
and justice to all who are treated unfairly.
7 He revealed his character to Moses
and his deeds to the people of Israel.
8 The Lord is compassionate and merciful,
slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.
9 He will not constantly accuse us,
nor remain angry forever.
10 He does not punish us for all our sins;
he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve.
11 For his unfailing love toward those who fear him
is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.
12 He has removed our sins as far from us
as the east is from the west.
13 The Lord is like a father to his children,
tender and compassionate to those who fear him.
14 For he knows how weak we are;
he remembers we are only dust.
INTRODUCTION:
A- The Challenge of Forgiving Ourselves
1- The most difficult person to forgive is the one you face in the mirror.
a- Forgiveness is not complete until you forgive yourself.
B- Two extreme examples of people who could have had a problem forgiving self:
1- Peter
If anybody had reason not to forgive himself it was the apostle Peter. On what must have been the most demanding night of Jesus’ life, Peter denied that he knew his Master. Jesus had foretold Peter’s behavior, saying, “Before the rooster crows twice, you will deny Me three times.” Sure enough, Peter did (Mark 14:66–72) .
We don’t know how Peter might have cried out to his heavenly Father in the aftermath of what he did that night. We don’t know what Peter might have said to the Lord after Jesus’ resurrection, but we do know this: Peter trusted Jesus to forgive what he had done. And Jesus trusted Peter to receive forgiveness.
After Jesus rose from the dead, an angel said to the women who came to the tomb, “Go, tell His disciples—and Peter—that He is going before you into Galilee; there you will see Him, as He said to you” (Mark 16:7). Jesus expected Peter to continue to follow Him. And Peter did. Jesus met Peter and some of the disciples by the shore of the Sea of Galilee one morning. When Peter heard the Lord’s voice calling to him from the shore, he left his fishing boat and “plunged into the sea”—he was in a hurry to get to Jesus as fast as he could. That is the response of a person who feels fully forgiven.
Jesus asked Peter three times, “Do you love Me?” Three times, Peter said, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” Three times, Jesus commanded Peter to care for the lambs and sheep of His flock. At the close of Jesus’ conversation with Peter, He said to him the same words He said at the beginning of their relationship: “Follow Me.” (John 21:1–19). Peter had a second chance to be Jesus’ disciple. And Peter took the opportunity for full restoration.
Peter became a vigorous leader in the early church in Jerusalem. His sermon on the Feast of Pentecost was one of the most effective and powerful soul–winning sermons ever preached. The text for his sermon was a passage from Joel that ends, “But everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” (Acts 2:21). Peter was also the first to preach the gospel to Gentiles. And what did he say to them? “He is the one all the prophets testified about, saying that everyone who believes in him will have their sins forgiven through his name.” (Acts 10:43).
Peter never could have preached such sermons or enjoyed such anointing on his life if he had not first been able to receive God’s forgiveness for himself.
* God does not anoint a spirit of unforgiveness, even if the person you are refusing to forgive is yourself.
2- Paul
The apostle Paul also was able to forgive himself. He referred to himself as the “chief” of all sinners (1 Tim. 1:15). That may very well have been the case. It is doubtful that anyone persecuted the early Christian church with more vehemence and zeal than did Saul (Paul). He breathed “threats and murder” against the disciples of Jesus (Acts 9:1).
And yet, nobody preached forgiveness more than Paul. Paul declared, “This is a trustworthy saying, and everyone should accept it: “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners”—and I am the worst of them all.” (1 Tim. 1:15).
* No matter what you may have done, you have not “out-sinned” Peter and Paul. They received God’s complete forgiveness, including the ability to forgive themselves. And so can you.
C- Why Don’t We Forgive Ourselves?
1- We may not have really experienced God’s forgiveness.
2- We may think we know something about our sin that God doesn’t know—and with that reasoning, we assume that God wouldn’t forgive us if He knew the full details of our sin.
3- We expect to sin again. Since we expect to fail again, we conclude that we can't be truly forgiven.
4- We are confronted by the consequences of our sin on a regular basis, and therefore, we draw a conclusion that we can’t be fully forgiven.
5- We can't understand why God would forgive us.
TS: What does God's Word say about the subject?

I - WE NEED TO FOCUS ON GOD'S FAITHFULNESS, RATHER THAN OUR FAILURES.

(PSALM 103:1-2)
Psalm 103:1–2 NLT
Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me.
"Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name.
2 Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me."

A- He provides complete forgiveness from the depths of his grace.

(Psalm 103:3-4) "He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. 4 He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies."
Psalm 103:3–4 NLT
He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies.
(Ephesians 1:7) "He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins."
Ephesians 1:7 NLT
He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins.

B- He redeems our lives and showers out his mercy upon us continually.

(Psalm 103:5-6) " He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. 5 He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!"
Psalm 103:5–6 NLT
He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle’s! The Lord gives righteousness and justice to all who are treated unfairly.
(Ephesians 1:8) "He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding."
Ephesians 1:8 NLT
He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding.
* Once we have received God's forgiveness through accepting Christ as Savior and Lord, we have been completely forgiven of our sins--not based upon our effort, but because of God's grace and mercy. The first step we must take toward freedom is focusing on God's faithfulness to forgive, not our failures to be perfect.

II - WE NEED TO UNDERSTAND THE NATURE OF GOD'S FORGIVENESS.

(Psalm 103:8-12) "8 The Lord is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. 9 He will not constantly accuse us, nor remain angry forever. 10 He does not
Psalm 103:8–12 NLT
The Lord is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. He will not constantly accuse us, nor remain angry forever. He does not punish us for all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve. For his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth. He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.
punish us for all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve. 11 For his unfailing
love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth. 12 He
has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.

A- God's forgiveness is based on his compassionate, unfailing love.

"8 The Lord is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.
"11 For his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth."

B- God's forgiveness provides for mercy toward us instead of judgment for our sins.

"9 He will not constantly accuse us, nor remain angry forever. 10 He does not punish us for
all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve."
1. The issue is settled, based upon our acceptance of Christ's sacrifice.
(John 3:17–18)" 17 God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him. 18 “There is no judgment against anyone who believes in him. But anyone who does not believe in him has already been judged for not believing in God’s one and only Son."
John 3:17–18 NLT
God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him. “There is no judgment against anyone who believes in him. But anyone who does not believe in him has already been judged for not believing in God’s one and only Son.

C- God's forgiveness is so complete, that guilt for our sins can never be restored.

(Psalm 103:12)"12 He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west."
Psalm 103:12 NLT
He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.
* Clip of Earth turning- ask "How long can you go east?"
1- From God's perspective, our sins are gone forever!

III - WE NEED TO ACCEPT THE NATURE OF OUR NEW RELATIONSHIP TO GOD.

(Psalm 103:13-14) "13 The Lord is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him. 14 For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust."
Psalm 103:13–14 NLT
The Lord is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him. For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust.

A- God's forgiveness has established us as children of God.

(John 1:12–13) "12 But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. 13 They are reborn—not with a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan, but a birth that comes from God."
John 1:12–13 NLT
But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. They are reborn—not with a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan, but a birth that comes from God.

B- God's forgiveness provides for the complete restoration of fellowship, even when we fail.

(Psalm 103:14) "For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust."
Psalm 103:14 NLT
For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust.
(1 John 1:8–10) "8 If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. 9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts."
1 John 1:8–10 NLT
If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.
CONCLUSION:

Seven Questions to Ask:

If you are struggling with forgiving yourself today, ask yourself these seven questions:
1. Why should I continue to condemn myself when God no longer condemns me?
(God has forgiven you; on what basis do you believe you have grounds to override His forgiveness?)
2. Is my self–condemnation drawing me into a more intimate relationship with God?
(It cannot.)
3. What good am I doing to myself or others by continually condemning myself?
(Nothing good comes from self–condemnation.)
4. Is my unwillingness to forgive myself helping me build healthy, loving relationships?
(You may be building relationships, but they cannot be healthy ones.)
5. Is my self–condemnation influencing God? In other words, is God going to be impressed with
my lack of self–forgiveness?
Is God going to do anything He would not do if I did forgive myself? (No, on all accounts.)
6. Is there any scriptural basis for continuing to condemn myself?
(No. There is scriptural evidence for your not continuing to do so. See Rom. 8:1.)
Romans 8:1 NLT
So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.
7. How long do I intend to condemn myself?
(How much self–condemnation is enough? How many years of self–unforgiveness suffice?)
The time to forgive yourself is now!

The Steps to Self–Forgiveness

The steps to self–forgiveness are the same as those you use when forgiving others.
1. Make an honest confession of the specific wrongs you have committed. Admit to God, “I’m
guilty.”
2. Confess that you have been harboring unforgiveness against yourself. Confess to God, “I
have kept myself in emotional bondage over this. I know it’s wrong. I repent of it and ask You to forgive me for doing this to myself.”
3. Reaffirm your faith in God’s promises of your forgiveness by Him. Speak aloud the verses
that affirm your salvation. (1 John 1:9; John 3:16; Rom. 10:9–10).
4. Act on your faith and out of your will, praying,
“God, on the basis of Your forgiveness of me, I now release myself from all guilt and condemnation. I accept Your forgiveness and I forgive myself. I declare myself to be completely free of this sin, guilt, and shame because of Christ’s work in me. Help me to walk with boldness and courage, and to leave all responsibility for this sin behind me at the Cross.”
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