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The Parent they need

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Need Parent

Introduction.

On the recording, Baldwin can be heard admonishing his 11-year-old, Ireland: “You are a rude, thoughtless little pig.”

“You don’t have the brains or the decency as a human being,” he says, apparently upset that she did not answer her phone for a planned call.

“I don’t give a ------ that you’re 12 years old, or 11 years old, or that you’re a child, or that your mother is a thoughtless pain in the ---- who doesn’t care about what you do as far as I’m concerned. You have humiliated me for the last time with this phone.”

Most of us heard the rage of a movie star bleched out against his 11 or 12 year old daughter this week on the news shows.. but the fact of the matter in viewing the question what kind of Parent do our children need the problem is not limited to high profile movie stars…

Average everyday people like you and me need to step it up…

The bible is so transparent the is tells us that David as dear as he was to the Heart of God.

Failed to give his sons what they needed.

1 Kings 1:5 Now bAdonijah the son of Haggith exalted himself, saying, “I will be king.” cAnd he prepared for himself chariots and horsemen, and fifty men to run before him. 6 His father had never at any time displeased him by asking, “Why have you done thus and so?” He was also a very handsome man, dand he was born next after Absalom.

Displeased- rebuked, reprimanded, corrected, disciplined,  pained, crossed, interfered, repressed, restrained, or checked.”

The root word- formed, shaped, or craved as in sculpting something from stone or wood.

What Kind of Parent does you child need??????

There are a lot of oppions, angles and experts.. but you can do not better then simple going to the times truths of the scriptre on being the best Parent, grandparent, uncle, aunt to the little ones in your life.

Eph. 6.1-4 gives us some powerful tools for shaping or craving, sculpting something lovely from the raw called our kids.

6 sChildren, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 t “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, ubut bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Parent children relationships have come a long way since… the time Paul wote these words… these words were gound breaking and radial.. in their day…

(i) There was the Roman patria potestas, the father’s power. Under the patria potestas a Roman father had absolute power over his family. He could sell them as slaves, he could make them work in his fields even in chains, he could punish as he liked and could even inflict the death penalty. Further, the power of the Roman father extended over the child’s whole life, so long as the father lived. A Roman son never came of age. Even when he was a grown man, even if he were a magistrate of the city, even if the state had crowned him with well-deserved honours, he remained within his father’s absolute power. “The great mistake,” writes Becker, “consisted in the Roman father considering the power which Nature imposes as a duty on the elders, of guiding and protecting a child during infancy, as extending over his freedom, involving his life and death, and continuing over his entire existence.” It is true that the father’s power was seldom carried to its limits, because public opinion would not have allowed it, but the fact remains that in the time of Paul the child was absolutely in his father’s power.

(ii) There was the custom of child exposure. When a child was born, it was placed before its father’s feet, and, if the father stooped and lifted the child, that meant that he acknowledged it and wished it to be kept. If he turned and walked away, it meant that he refused to acknowledge it and the child could quite literally be thrown out.

There is a letter whose date is 1 B. C. from a man called Hilarion to his wife Alis. He has gone to Alexandria and he writes home on domestic affairs:

“Hilarion to Alis his wife heartiest greetings, and to my dear Berous and Apollonarion. Know that we are still even now in Alexandria. Do not worry if when all others return I remain in Alexandria. I beg and beseech of you to take care of the little child, and, as soon as we receive wages, I will send them to you. If—good luck to you!—you have a child, if it is a boy, let it live; if it is a girl, throw it out. ‘Do not forget me.’ How can I forget you? I beg you therefore not to worry.”

It is a strange letter, so full of affection and yet so callous towards the child who may be born.

A Roman baby always ran the risk of being repudiated and exposed. In the time of Paul that risk was even greater. We have seen how the marriage bond had collapsed and how men and women changed their partners with bewildering rapidity. Under such circumstances a child was a misfortune. So few children were born that the Roman government actually passed legislation that the amount of any legacy that a childless couple could receive was limited. Unwanted children were commonly left in the Roman forum. There they became the property of anyone who cared to pick them up. They were collected at nights by people who nourished them in order to sell them as slaves or to stock the brothels of Rome.

(iii) Ancient civilization was merciless to the sickly or deformed child. Seneca writes, “We slaughter a fierce ox; we strangle a mad dog; we plunge the knife into sickly cattle lest they taint the herd; children who are born weakly and deformed we drown.” The child who was a weakling or imperfectly formed had little hope of survival.

It was against this situation that Paul wrote his advice to children and parents. If ever we are asked what good Christianity has done to the world, we need but point to the change effected in the status of women and of children.

[1]

The Parent Your child needs

  1. Is one they can trust.
     Eph. 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

        Children obey  (parents)
To hearken at the door,”

to listen, to harken. 1a of one who on the knock at the door comes to listen who it is, (the duty of a porter). 2 to harken to a command. 2a to obey, be obedient to, submit to.

 

WE have to get them to open the door to us.. is not a given.

Come make your self welcome.

 

   This is right.
You will not bring walk into their world give them the dity dozen

1.      Impact them with neglect.
(craving affection)

2.      Inject them with Impurity.

3.      Inflame  them with Ridicule

4.      Injure them with abruse.

5.      inflict them with insecurity.

6.      Inform them of thier ackwardness

The Parent Your child needs

  1. Is one that Embeds Respect.

    Eph. 6:2“Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise),

Tree with a chain Enbeded chain in a pecan tree. It is there and it’s not coming out.

Honor. the role of Dignity. Worth, Nobility. Tribute.

Cultivating Honor

Worth-honor is the knowedge of the weightness of the position.

091 τιμάω [timao /tim·ah·o/] v. From 5093; TDNT 8:169; TDNTA 1181; GK 5506; 21 occurrences; AV translates as “honour” 19 times, and “value” twice. 1 to estimate, fix the value. 1a for the value of something belonging to one’s self. 2 to honour, to have in honour, to revere, venerate.

Gen. τιμή1 means 1. the “worth” one ascribes to a person, i.e., “satisfaction,” “compensation,” “evaluation,” “honour”; 2. (only after Hom.) the value of a thing, “price,” “purchase price.”

In detail2 τιμή denotes 1. legal “appraisal,” “compensation,” “penalty,” “satisfaction,”

[2]

Jesus said, a prohoet is not without honor except in his own country.

Some parents wonder why their children do not honor them… if they would listen to the lack of honor and respect that comes out of their lives to those who lead .. they could probpley break the code to the map of why their kids… understand the wings of honor.

  

The Lord is worthy…
honoring others is key to personal Idenity.

A balanced mix of love and authority

To Know who to honor who and what is to be honored is the key to a prospers tommow.now what to honor…

Honor a good testimony..

Honor a good name

Honor hard work

Honor a heart after God

Honor servent leaders

Honor those who pay a price

Honor

Parents cannot not destoy the role of authority on their watch..

We are to lead in a way that engenders  or gives birth to  honor.

(how do we do that)

The Parent Your child needs
3. Paints a Portrait of their Potential

   Eph. 6: 3“that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”

Stewardship of Potential—The Possiblity of providing good, positive, spiritual, healthy and worthy blessing to our children.

Go well

οιμος, ἑτοιμάζω, ἑτοιμασία, προετοιμάζω

The clear meaning of this word group is preparation both in the active sense of “making ready” and in the passive of “readiness,” “ability” or “resolution.”

[3]

 Long time… Marked chrones… you tommorws will be marked by greating things.

You have marked future…you set up distination points for you future decades.

Show them  how to confess sin.

Worship.

Block time for bible inspiration..

How to forgive..(signs of real forgiveness)

train up a child.

 This is not the function of a religious robot.

Robot.. cold stiff predicted movments..

You train has to be warm and flexable.

Modern                                                     Post modern

Romantic view of life                                           absurd view of life.
purpose                                                                  play

Design                                                                   chance                         

Hierarchy                                                              anarchy

Word                                                                     silence

A completed work                                                            process

Analysis from a distance                                       analysis through participation

Post modernism would argue that you can’t  divorce yourself from the interpretative process of knowing: Therefore, your own perceptions, understandings bias, presuppositions will always taint your conclusions of what is true.

The Parent Your child needs
4.  Is one that Cheers them on.

 Eph. 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, ubut bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Col. 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged

Do not provoke
vex. Or

and thus means the “lavish swelling of sap and vigour,” “thrusting and upsurging” in nature, originally gener. a. the “impulsive nature” of man or beast, esp. the impulsive state of the human disposition, which in contrast to more inward and quiet ἦθος[4]

Understand the “Why” behing the rules..

We lost a generation of youth in the sixtes because we refused to answer the Hard questions…

Admonition- word study.. means mind… or the reason behind something.

What are the issues behind what we say…

Do not just say.. “Our Understand the “Why” behing the rules..

We lost a generation of youth in the sixtes because we refused to answer the Hard questions…

Admonition- word study.. means mind… or the reason behind something.

What are the issues behind what we say…

Do not just say.. “Our church does not do that” or I say so that’s good enougth.

Base you what you say on your convictions about the Word of God gives a clear sence of uncertainly about what you are saying. “If cheap reasons are given, however how high sounding they may be don’t be surpiresed if your kids rebel or end up away from God.
Jack hayford in blessing your children..

Two factors for reasons:

  1. Long range quality of life and best intrest.
  2. In light of the word of God.. that your commited to.

Train a child.

Prov. 22:6  Train up a child in the way he should go: even when he is old he will not depart from it.

church does not do that” or I say so that’s good enougth.

Base you what you say on your convictions about the Word of God gives a clear sence of uncertainly about what you are saying. “If cheap reasons are given, however how high sounding they may be don’t be surpiresed if your kids rebel or end up away from God.
Jack hayford in blessing your children..

Two factors for reasons:

  1. Long range quality of life and best intrest.
  2. In light of the word of God.. that your commited to.

Cheer them on.

Ps. 71.17 O God, from my youth you have taught me,

          and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds.

 18 So even to eold age and gray hairs,

          O God, fdo not forsake me,

     until I proclaim your might to another generation,

          your power to all those to come.

[5]

Tell Your child the story of how:
 you got saved.
ex. 12:24-27

2.      The story of How:

God provided for you.

Ex. 16:32

3.      The Story of How:
God forgave you.
Num. 16:38J

4.      The Story of How:
God guided you.
Joshua 4:5-7

5.      The Story of How:
God delivered you.
Esther 9:26

6.      The Story of God’s

Judgment and Mercy.
Joel 1:2-4


Prayers

Number

23     Speak unto Aaron and unto his sons, saying, On this wise ye shall bless the children of Israel, saying unto them, 24     The LORD bless thee, and keep thee: 25     The LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee: 26     The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace. 27     And they shall put my name upon the children of Israel; and I will bless them. [6]


----

b 2 Sam. 3:4

c 2 Sam. 15:1

d 2 Sam. 3:3, 4; 1 Chr. 3:2

s Prov. 1:8; 6:20; 23:22

t Cited from Ex. 20:12

u Gen. 18:19; Deut. 4:9; 6:7; 11:19; Ps. 78:4; Prov. 19:18; 22:6; 29:17; [2 Tim. 3:15]

[1]The letters to the Galatians and Ephesians. 2000, c1976 (W. Barclay, lecturer in the University of Glasgow, Ed.). The Daily study Bible series, Rev. ed. (176). Philadelphia: The Westminster Press.

v v: verb

TDNT Theological Dictionary of the New Testament

TDNTA Theological Dictionary of the New Testament, Abridged in One Volume

GK Goodrick-Kohlenberger

AV Authorized Version

1 Behind the noun τιμή is τίω “to value,” “to esteem highly,” “to honour,” which was known to Hom. (in prose replaced by τιμάω) and is usually combined with τίνω, “to make amends for” etc. (root qu̯ei and qu̯i), cf. Boisacq, Hofmann, s.v. [Risch]. Cf. also M. Greindl, Κλεος, κυδος, ευχος, τιμη, φατις, δοξα, Diss. Munich (1938), 59, who thinks the original sense of τιμή is “compensation,” also E. Pfister, “Die Hekata-Episode in Hesiods Theogonie,” Philol., 84 (1929), 5.

Hom. Homer, of Chios (?), the classical Greek epic poet, around whose name were grouped the older epics of the Ionians in the 9th and 8th centuries b.c., ed. G. Monro and T. W. Allen, 1908 ff.

2 On the rich and many-faceted meaning of the word group cf. Liddell-Scott, Pape, s.v., For Hom. cf. H. Ebeling, Lex. Homericum, II (1963), s.v.

[2]Theological dictionary of the New Testament. 1964-c1976. Vols. 5-9 edited by Gerhard Friedrich. Vol. 10 compiled by Ronald Pitkin. (G. Kittel, G. W. Bromiley & G. Friedrich, Ed.) (electronic ed.) (8:169). Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans.

[3]Theological dictionary of the New Testament. 1964-c1976. Vols. 5-9 edited by Gerhard Friedrich. Vol. 10 compiled by Ronald Pitkin. (G. Kittel, G. W. Bromiley & G. Friedrich, Ed.) (electronic ed.) (2:704). Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans.

u Gen. 18:19; Deut. 4:9; 6:7; 11:19; Ps. 78:4; Prov. 19:18; 22:6; 29:17; [2 Tim. 3:15]

esp. especially.

[4]Theological dictionary of the New Testament. 1964-c1976. Vols. 5-9 edited by Gerhard Friedrich. Vol. 10 compiled by Ronald Pitkin. (G. Kittel, G. W. Bromiley & G. Friedrich, Ed.) (electronic ed.) (5:383). Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans.

e Isai. 46:4

f ver. 9

[5]The Holy Bible : English standard version. 2001 (Ps 71:17-18). Wheaton: Standard Bible Society.

[6]The Holy Bible : King James Version. 1995 (electronic ed. of the 1769 edition of the 1611 Authorized Version.) (Nu 6:23-27). Bellingham WA: Logos Research Systems, Inc.

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