What Does a Deacon Look Like?
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Grace to you and peace from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. It is a privilege to share the Word of God with the Saints of Durbin Memorial Baptist Church.
This morning we practiced the ordinance of the Lord’s Supper. Now, I want to do something different. This is something some churches throughout history have practiced but I’ll talk more about that in a few moments. Guy’s could you come forward.
Spend a few minutes washing feet on the front row. pray for the men as you wash their feet.
Thank you guys. you can go back to your seats.
Man, that was awkward. *Laugh*
I was recently talking with someone about foot washing ceremonies and he said he’s never participated in one before and that he’s aren’t a “big feet guy”. Well neither am I!
So why would I do this then? Allow me to read for you from John 13:5-17
5 Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. 6 He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, do you wash my feet?” 7 Jesus answered him, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.” 8 Peter said to him, “You shall never wash my feet.” Jesus answered him, “If I do not wash you, you have no share with me.” 9 Simon Peter said to him, “Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!” 10 Jesus said to him, “The one who has bathed does not need to wash, except for his feet, but is completely clean. And you are clean, but not every one of you.” 11 For he knew who was to betray him; that was why he said, “Not all of you are clean.” 12 When he had washed their feet and put on his outer garments and resumed his place, he said to them, “Do you understand what I have done to you? 13 You call me Teacher and Lord, and you are right, for so I am. 14 If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. 15 For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you. 16 Truly, truly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. 17 If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.
In this section of Scripture the one to whom, through whom, and for whom all of creation was made, humbles Himself before His followers and washes their feet. This passage deserves a longer exploration than I am going to give it this morning, but I want us all to note the significance of Christ the King stooping to wash the feet of His disciples. Because of the sandals they wore and the dusty conditions of the region, washing feet was a necessary part of life. However, foot washing was reserved for the lowliest of menial servants. Even peers, people on the same social level, didn’t wash each other’s feet except in very rare occasions to mark great love and admiration. In this section of Scripture from John 13, Jesus’ actions are symbolic of spiritual cleansing and thus leading to a greater truth than simply washing, but this is also a great model of Christian humility. In the washing of feet, Jesus is showcasing the selfless service ultimately expressed on the cross.
Now, throughout history, many church groups have practiced foot-washing as a regular ordinance. Some of you may have gone to churches that regularly practiced foot washing. While I wouldn’t wouldn’t say that is inherently wrong to do it, I do not believe it is a regular ordinance of the church. Our statement of faith says that we believe there are two biblical church ordinances, baptism and the Lord’s Supper, one of which we practiced today. Why is this the case? For a few reasons. First of all, Foot washing is not instructed in any of epistles nor depicted as an ordinance in early church gatherings by the historical documentation available today. Further, while humility is highlighted today when we do it, our culture does not have the same understanding of footwashing as a practical need in the home. As we will see later in the book of 1 Timothy, chapter 5, Christian widows are shown to be washing the feet of the saints, but in context, that is talking about her service in the household, and not in anyway connected to a church gathering.
So why did I just do that? I did it because foot washing, while not an ordinance of the church, undoubtedly emphasizes humility. It does not have the same cultural connection for us today as it did in the first century, but the stillness in the room shows how odd it seems for even a pastor like myself to get down on the ground and wash another man’s feet, much less the King of Kings. Jesus Christ, the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, to give His life as a ransom for many, to bear the suffering and humiliation of the cross to reconcile an unholy creature to a Holy God.
And that Christ who saved us has called us to serve others! To humble ourselves, to be willing to “wash the feet” of those who may have less social status than us. That doesn’t have to be by literally washing their feet, indeed its probably not that, but it does mean we use whatever gifts God has given us to SERVE others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. You don’t have to wash feet or have your’s washed. The point is that if you know Christ as Lord you have received the ultimate act of service and you have been called to extend service to others even at cost to your pride.
If you haven’t already, open your Bibles to 1 Timothy 3. In just a few moments, we are going to walk through the qualifications for a deacon. The word deacon comes from the Greek, Diakanos, meaning servant. It is someone who waits tables, who sees to the needs of others. As I have tried to showcase this morning, service is not beneath any of us. We are all called to be servants. But as a gift of God, He has created the formal position of Deacon within the church and the deacons are to be the one spearheading the service within the church, seeking the good of everyone in the household of the faith and preemptively solving conflict among the body of believers. You can find more detail about the origination and role of a deacon in Acts 6. This morning as we walk through the qualifications of Deacons we are seeing what qualities we are to be looking at for those who are to fill the second recognized office of the New Testament church. A couple weeks ago we looked at Elders or Pastors, this week Deacons. There will be some overlap and many of us will see that we may not be called to fill the formal office of deacon. That is okay! We can see these virtues as God honoring and still learn about God-honoring service. Also, as a congregationalist church we need to know what we are looking for when a diaconal candidate is brought before the church. So let us begin in 1 Tim 3:8
8 Deacons likewise must be dignified, not double-tongued, not addicted to much wine, not greedy for dishonest gain.
Some of what we see in the list of qualifications will be similar to that of elders or fairly self explanatory so as we walk through this, we will spend more time in some qualities than others.
In just this first verse we are given a four-in-one qualification that is very similar to what we learned about elders.
First we see that deacons are to be dignified. They are to be respected and respectable. Now as I mentioned, that all of us can learn God-honoring virtues from this list, we should make note that deacons aren’t the only ones called to be dignified. In Titus 2:2 all older men in the church are to be instructed to be dignified as well. We would all do well to seek to be dignified. How do we do that? Well in this verse Paul gives Timothy three examples of how NOT to be dignified. He first says Deacons are not be double-tongued. This means you can trust the man to be consistent in his speech. What he tells you will be the same thing he tells me and so on. Deacons are not supposed to be known for their backbiting and hypocrisy! If deacons are supposed to be keeping peace in the church then they certainly shouldn’t be the ones stirring the pot! They ought to be trust worthy.
Then we read that their dignity is defined by not being addicted to much wine. That is not given to drink, not preoccupied by alcohol. As we said when we looked at elder qualifications: Drunkenness was an ancient blight that hasn’t gotten better today. We aren’t to be driven by our appetites. If you have a vice that consumes your thought, I implore you today to give it up for the glory of God. I know that can be difficult but come to me or someone you trust in this church and we will support you through it. We’ll pray with you and put together an accountability strategy. Let’s not just talk about qualifications, lets get better for the glory of God!
Deacons are not to be addicted to wine, nor money as we see at the end of the verse. When you are consumed by either vice you are proving yourself to be worthy of respect. Deacons in the church are to be embrace having high character. This does not mean that they will be sinless, we know that anyone who says they do not sin is a liar. But the deacon’s life should be marked by being respectable in conduct.
Let’s move one to more qualifications. Look at verse 9:
9 They must hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience.
We see a deviation from the qualifications of elders here. The elders must be able to teach, deacons must be well taught. Paul uses this word “mystery” throughout the New Testament epistles to describe something that was once hidden but now has been revealed. It is talking about the God’s revealed plan of salvation for greeks and jews, slaves and free, the gospel, the good news of Jesus Christ. One pastor wrote, “The Old Testament mystery was, how can God forgive sins? It was answered by Jesus’ death as the Father’s incarnate and sinless Son suffered the wrath we deserved, thus making forgiveness possible. … This is what deacons must understand and hold on to: Christ Jesus died on the cross for their sins (indeed he became sin for them), and if they believe, trusting in his atoning work alone, they will be saved. In a word, they must understand the mystery of the cross.” Deacons don’t have to be the teachers in the world. But they must know dearly the truth of the gospel and hold tightly to it WITH A CLEAR CONSCIENCE.
This means that not only should a deacon understand the gospel, but that the gospel has impacted their lives. They live by the gospel! Paul has talked about having a good conscience all throughout this letter to Timothy. As we said when going through chapter one, As we grow in our affection for God’s Word, He will work through His Word and direct our conscience. Waging the good warfare, holding faith and good conscience is done by right “belief” and right “practice.” Both are found in and directed by the Word of God. Deacons likewise approve their actions by the Word of God.
10 And let them also be tested first; then let them serve as deacons if they prove themselves blameless.
Just like pastors or elders should not be recent converts, we should also not be too hasty to thrust men into the office of deacon. We’re not given an exact time frame, but there should be prudence involved to ensure that we aren’t rushing into things where someone may abuse a title for gain when it is intended to direct service. We also need to remember that holding a position like deacon or pastor does not have any bearing on anyone’s eternal position before God. It is okay to weigh matters and take our time on this. We implore other on behalf of Christ be reconciled unto God, not become a deacon. We should get analysis paralysis and never make a decision, but it is good to allow a period of time for someone to show themself.
11 Their wives likewise must be dignified, not slanderers, but sober-minded, faithful in all things.
The next qualification pertains to the deacon’s wife. There are some who argue that this verse is not talking about a deacon’s wife but rather women deaconesses. Within those who hold this view, some do so because they believe Paul to be a mysoginst who needs to be ignored and that the Bible ought to catch up this time. This perspective denies biblical inerrancy and should be outright rejected. I wouldn’t entertain debate centered around that perspective. Others holding to the view that this verse refers to deaconesses still remain in the conservative camp and we can agree that Scripture is inerrant and sufficient. They would argue that the greek word for wife can also mean woman. That is correct and if you look at verses like John 4:27 it is translated as woman talking about the unmarried woman at the well. They also point to Romans 16:1 where Phoebe is called a servant or deaconess. They say it is odd for deacon’s wives to have specific qualifications while nothing is mentioned about Elder’s wives. People in this specific camp still hold to complementarian marriage and male eldership in the church, but view the role of servant as open to men and women so long as the deacons are purely serving and not serving in a deacon/elder hybrid role. I have dear friends in this camp that I have some great and charitable conversations with.
However, I believe this to be an incorrect interpretation. In addition to God’s created order being reflected in the church as we discussed a few weeks ago, the structure of the paragraph before us today doesn’t lend itself to be talking about deaconesses. Though it may be strange for the wives of deacons to be mentioned while elders’ are not, it would be even stranger to give a list for male deacons, then females, then back to males in verse 12 that we will get to in a moment. Further more, when we got to verse 8 Paul used the word “likewise” to distinguish deacons as a group that is similar but distinct from the group of elders. Thus, the likewise here is saying this group is related to deacons, but not the same thing. Lastly, in the very next verse the same greek word is used and it is inarguably translated as wife.
So after considering all of the context, it is my belief and the position of the church to elect male deacons. So here in verse 12, Paul is telling Timothy that a deacon’s wife should be as dignified and respectable as the husband. As “one-flesh” they should be working together. The husband and wife reflect on one another. The wife of a deacon must be worthy of respect, refrain from malicious gossip, remain clear minded, and dependable.
12 Let deacons each be the husband of one wife, managing their children and their own households well.
This qualification runs hand in hand with the Elders qualification. The deacon, like the elder, must be faithful to his wife in a monogamous relationship. To be a “one-woman man” prohibits promiscuity and homosexuality. A deacon must have a clear and consistent pattern of honor, love, and devotion to his wife alone.” The deacon must likewise manage the household well. This does not mean that everything is always perfect or even that all of his children necessarily are believing Christians. Rather, a faithful deacon will be one who leads his home and who disciplines his children diligently, and that attention to discipline will be reflected in some degree in his children’s behavior.
Something that we majorly overlook is that the home is forefront of ministry. Before we get caught up in going on missions all over the world, we need to first keep our own houses in order and share the grace and truth of God unashamedly with our own family.
13 For those who serve well as deacons gain a good standing for themselves and also great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.
Here, Paul emphasizes that those who faithfully fulfill their roles as deacons not only earn a commendable reputation within the church community but also cultivate a deepened confidence in their faith in Christ. Through their steadfast service and commitment to righteousness, deacons exemplify the virtues essential for effective ministry and spiritual leadership, embodying a profound expression of faith that inspires others to follow suit. The ESV commentary notes “The term rendered “confidence” denotes freedom and boldness to speak. Like Stephen in his heroic martyrdom (Acts 6:10; 7:1–53), deacons may find that their service affords them opportunities to bear witness. Such faithful service leads to greater standing and confidence to speak about Christ and his gospel, for greater service reflects an increasing “faith” in Christ Jesus.”
Deacons are servants called to lead in serving the church, they are to be the one proactively seeking peace and unity in the church. They should be respected and respectable, holding tight to gospel in belief and practice, tested and firm, and supported by respectable wives, children, and household. As we see in verse 13, it is good to have good deacons.
All of us should be aware of the qualifications God has laid out for deacons in His church. Deacons, live up to the calling God has placed on your life. Be proactive in serving and keeping peace in the church. We love, trust, and respect you. Keep going for the glory of God. Young men, aspire to be tested and entrusted with leading service in the church. It is good to glorify God through faithful service to His church. But it likely that many of us wont be deacons. That may not be the role that God has designed for you to have in His Kingdom. That is okay. Whether you are formally called to be a deacon or not, you have been called to serve. We ought not let a title or position decide how we practice our faith. We all ought to desire to serve others well for the glory of God.
Why are we here this morning? Are we here because we all want to be pastors? Are we here so that every can call us a deacon and we feel better about ourselves? I sure hope not. I hope we are here to honor, praise, a grow in our knowledge of our Lord and Savior who stepped out of heaven to serve us! Jesus doesn’t just wash our feet, but by grace through faith, on the cross He washed us of our sins and reconciled us to the Holy God! We have been enable to serve God and serve others because of how Christ serves us! Church, may we cherish this honor. May we live each moment in reflection of the grace we have received, seeking to share that grace with others! That doesn’t mean washing people’s feet, but it does mean stewarding the gifts God has given us to compassionately meet people at their point of need, and not only to meet their physical needs, but to tell them of their spiritual needs and how Christ is the only answer.
The heart of the Gospel message is that salvation comes through grace, received by faith in Jesus Christ, accompanied by genuine repentance from sin. God, in His infinite love and mercy, sent His Son Jesus Christ into the world to redeem humanity from the power and consequences of sin. Jesus lived a sinless life, died on the cross as a perfect sacrifice for our sins, and rose again on the third day, conquering sin and death. Through His sacrifice, we are offered forgiveness, reconciliation with God, and eternal life. This gift of salvation cannot be earned through our own efforts or good deeds; it is freely given by God's grace. All that is required of us is to believe in Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior, acknowledging our need for His forgiveness and surrendering our lives to His lordship. Alongside faith, true repentance is vital—a genuine turning away from sin and a sincere desire to live in obedience to God's will. As we trust in Jesus and turn from our sinful ways, we are born again spiritually, adopted into God's family, and empowered by the Holy Spirit to live a life that honors and glorifies God. This is the essence of the Gospel: salvation by grace through faith in Jesus Christ, accompanied by repentance from sin, leading to a transformed life and an eternal relationship with God. In this we are enabled to serve. Will you join me in serving today? Let’s pray.