Family Made | Preparing Your Arrows to Soar
Family Made • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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· 3 viewsLaunching Arrows - may this be an opportunity to interview Jim Burns and give him responsibility to give the message?
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May I invite you to stand and speak with me in one voice the guiding verse for our series together:
*LED: “2 Corinthians 5:17 (NIV): Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”
In the original Greek, the word translated for anyone quite literally means, ‘Anyone.’ :) It means you, and yes, I am talking to you. No matter your past, no matter your story. Jesus said “I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even after dying. Everyone who lives in me and believes in me will never ever die. John 11:25-26, NLT. This is our hope for believing in a better tomorrow.
Today marks the third week of our series Family Made. Each week of this series focuses on a different keystone modeled by God in the creation narratives of Genesis chapters 1 and 2. Each one of these six keystones help us build our families according to God’s very best for us. These keystones are: Presence, Perseverance, Preparation, Protection, Prayer, and Participation. Today, we’re going to take a close look at the third keystone of preparation in relationship to parents with their children.
Jesus said in Matthew 18:10, See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven. In the days of Jesus, Jewish tradition believed that no created being, not even angels, saw the face of the Father. Yet, Jesus said that the angels of our little ones ‘always see the Father face to face.’ Jesus’ teaching illustrates the love and care that God feels for our children. Indeed, children are a blessing. They are a joy and a gift, except between the hours of 4pm and 7pm, Monday through Friday - something happens during these hours that tend to look something like this:
*LED: SHOW OFFICE MEME
Can anyone relate? No matter how difficult, though, children are a blessing from the Lord. In its most basic definition, blessing simply means favor or gift. Blessing is God’s most ancient instinct and blessing is our deepest longing. Children are one of many ways that God shows his favor.
For those of us longing for a child, your experience may feel like anything else except a blessing. It feels lonely, disappointing, discouraging. Yet, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” Psalm 34:18, NLT. Meaning that perhaps in your pain, the Lord desires to show his favor to you by offering his up close and personal presence with you.
God’s favor finds us in all kinds of surprising and unexpected ways, so amidst whatever soul ache that we may be experiencing right now, bring your questions… bring your doubts… and, offer him your fears… because the Lord is close enough to rescue your weary spirit.
His blessing belongs to all those who belong to Jesus. The Apostle Paul wrote, “All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ.” Ephesians 1:3, NLT.
In Genesis chapter 2, one of the many ways that God’s favor finds us is in his call to fill the earth with his image bearers and to govern the earth according to his character. This is God’s charge to families, and he defines family like this: *LED: God created you in love for love to join together with another in the sacred union of covenantal love between one man and one woman to form a family for God’s continued work of transforming love through you!
God designed family life for us to experience the same love and fellowship that he enjoys in himself as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Whatever age and stage of life in which you find yourself or whatever your family composition, family is the seedbed for love to grow.
According to the most recent research from universities across the conservative-liberal spectrum, most studies agree that children need the rich soil of families to reach their full potential. Family advocate, Bernice Weissbourd once wrote, “However the forms of life have changed and the number expanded, the role of the family has remained constant and it continues to be the major institution through which children pass en route to adulthood.
Whether little, adolescent, young adult, or grown, children need the love and presence of their parents. Though the methods of delivery change with each new age and stage of life, research shows that parents remain among the most influential people throughout a person’s life. Even if seasons of life have passed… or words have been said that can’t be unsaid… or decisions were made that can’t be unmade, every child needs their parent. The hope of our faith says that: Every morning is a new mercy. Every breath is a grace. It’s not too late.
God modeled his persevering love for us like a father in pursuit of his children. Your family’s worth fighting for across every age and stage. Here’s how the Psalmist described this: *LED: “Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him. Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands. How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them! Psalm 127:3-5
Parents, did you hear what God’s Word calls you? Though this Psalm specifically addresses men, I believe that God’s call in this passage applies to all parents to live like warriors. Children are like arrows in your warrior hands, created to soar… defend… advance… protect… and win the victory! Arrows go where the warrior cannot go, so how are you preparing your arrows to take flight beyond you?
If you need some inspiration on the potential and possibilities of how to prepare your arrow to soar, then check out this video from some of my favorite dudes on youtube: *LED: SHOW Dude Perfect clip
What an amazing display of power and versatility. God sees you, warrior parent, with the same power and versatility to prepare your arrows to bend curves, avoid obstacles, skim water, and go the distance. God created you with his warrior heart in you, for our God is a warrior God!
God spoke to Moses: “The Lord is a warrior; Yahweh is his name!” Exodus 15:3, NLT.
God spoke to the prophet Jeremiah: “It is the Lord who provides the sun to light the day and the moon and stars to light the night, and who stirs the sea into roaring waves. His name is the Lord of Heaven’s Armies.” Jeremiah 31:35, NLT.
God spoke to the prophet Hosea: “The Lord God of Heaven’s Armies, the Lord is his name!” Hosea 12:5, NLT.
God made you in his image, to be like him, and he is a warrior. As a father himself, I believe God knows that every parent needs a warrior heart to raise image bearers in a broken world like ours.
What do we know about a warrior?
Warriors are equipped for battle.
Warriors are committed to the mission.
Warriors are ready to sacrifice.
And the fiercest warriors choose not to lead with the might but with wisdom.
Who does a warrior describe more accurately than a parent? Have you ever experienced a fiercer love than a mother or a father? Perhaps some of us feel like a warrior in our roles as parents, but I think most of us probably feel less than a warrior.
In a recent comprehensive study commissioned by Think Orange, our curriculum partner that we trust for our Kids ministry and Student ministry, the Arbor research group conducted a national survey on the state of parents among Christian and non-Christian families, alike.
The study revealed a number of fascinating conclusions in regard to how parents feel about their roles. The most encouraging insight from the study concluded that: Overall, all parents feel relatively confident in their ability to parent.
LED: (read from LED)
Yet, 79% of all moms - including all Christians and non-Christians surveyed - across the socioeconomic spectrum feel alone, worried, and judged. What Most Parents Aren’t Telling You, p. 52
LED:
And 51% of all dads - including all Christians and non-Christians surveyed - across the socioeconomic spectrum feel confused about parenting their children. p. 52
The good news, however, is that if you feel this way, then there’s hope. LED: A growing faith in Jesus and active participation in a local church decrease negative feelings about parenting over time, so if you feel ‘alone, worried, and judged’ or ‘confused’ about your parenting right now, then take heart that these emotions don’t necessarily define your future.
Every parent warrior loses a day from time to time, but winning the mission means that we don’t forsake our calling to commit ourselves to the daily practice of giving our children what they need to soar.
After Stacy and I brought our oldest, Hannah, home from the hospital, a family friend of ours said, LED: “The days are long, but the years are short. It’s just a phase, so don’t miss it.” Meaning stay committed. Don’t give up. Every phase of childhood has its joys and its hardships. These words still echo in my mind. Some days, I do miss it. I fall short, and I always feel guilty about it.
The other day, my youngest Eden wanted me to play a game, but I was in the middle of something, so she walked away. When I went back to her a little while later, she was already in bed for the night. I missed it, but I am learning how to apply Proverbs 24:16, not only in my parenting, but across my life: The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. Proverbs 24:16.
This wisdom gives me great hope as a warrior parent because I frequently fall so short. We all do, and our kids see us when we fall short, so instead of hiding it or excusing our shortcomings away, what if we modeled to them what we believe and why. LED: We are their theology. I want my kids to know God as a God of forgiveness, truth and grace, and unconditional love by how I receive God’s love and then show his love to my kids.
The Apostle Paul gives warriors remarkable insight on how to prepare their arrows for flight in two letters that he wrote to a young arrow named Timothy. Most scholars place Timothy in his late teens or early 20s when Paul released him to soar into pastoral leadership over the church in Ephesus.
In addition to providing loads of leadership lessons and theological understanding, these two letters reveal a kind of father-son relationship between Paul and Timothy. In Paul’s first letter, he calls Timothy his ‘true son,’ and in his second letter, he calls Timothy his ‘dear son.’
In 2 Timothy 1:4, Paul writes, “Recalling your tears, I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy.” This verse seems to indicate that Timothy felt moved to tears when Paul last said goodbye. Interestingly, none of Paul’s letters ever mention a wife or children, so by all accounts, Paul’s mentorship with Timothy fulfilled a parental longing in Paul’s warrior heart. These two letters give an astounding biblical precedence for men and women without children to stand in the gap as warrior father-figures and warrior mother-figures for children in need.
I told you my story. My father abandoned his quiver and went AWOL - absent without leave - but my story also features a battalion of warrior father figures who each had a hand in preparing my brother and me to soar! For some of us without biological children or in an empty nest stage of life, the Lord may be calling you to live with your full warrior heart to love other children in need.
Here, I am reminded of our good friend, Vicki Fernandez. Vicki is a decades long member of our church and regularly produces our weekend experiences. If you know Vicki, then you know her warrior heart. She leads with character and integrity across every aspect of her life. She’s fierce and loyal and full of love. Vicki doesn’t have any biological children of her own, but her warrior heart has mothered countless young people across the generations. Every Mother’s Day, many of us thank her for her mothering presence in all our lives, including my own. This is the grace of God’s village for families who choose to receive the love and presence of other warrior parent figures to help prepare their arrows to soar.
In Paul’s second letter to his son in the faith, he opens with a clear charge to every arrow preparing for flight! He wrote, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7, NLT.
Every parent and child needs to memorize this verse. This is the vision for every arrow’s destination: power, love, and self-discipline, but first, Paul reminds us of who we are not. Fear and timidity do not define our lives, nor do they align with God’s Spirit alive in us.
One of the outcomes of fear is avoidance. We tend to avoid situations that we fear or might cause us discomfort or pain. The way that we overcome our fear is by disciplining ourselves to do hard things, such as engaging in crucial conversations, maintaining our commitments, creating healthy boundaries, and so much more.
In fact, God gives the command ‘do not fear’ 365 times in the Bible. Isn’t that fascinating? Do not fear 365, one for each day of the year. God gave you his warrior heart, not a spirit of fear. Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. 1 John 4:18.
He also didn’t give you a spirit of timidity, which means a lack of courage. Rather, God said to Joshua and says to every believer: “This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9, NLT. With Christ’s Spirit living in you and his Word to guide your way, you have everything you need to win.
What God has given us is a spirit of power, love, and discipline.
***Power, love, and self-discipline each depend upon the other:
Power and love without self-discipline results in a person with no boundaries.
Power and self-discipline without love results in a person with no empathy.
Love and self-discipline without power results in a person with no fortitude.
Jesus embodied power, love, and discipline, altogether.
Jesus loved. He made himself vulnerable, and offered his life as an atoning sacrifice for our sin.
Jesus lived with power. He healed the sick, raised the dead to life, and conquered the grave to show his victory over sin!
Jesus was disciplined. He measured his words. He managed his emotions. And he lived in a regular rhythm of prayer with the Father.
2 Timothy 1:7 provides a clear and succinct charge for every warrior parent to prepare their children to engage and overcome all the unforeseen challenges of living in this world. So, warriors, this week, may I invite you to take up God’s Word as:
Sandpaper to shape your arrow
Manual for the warrior
Flightpath to follow
1. God’s Word shapes an arrow like sandpaper. This means warrior parents need to sharpen and guide their arrows with direct life on life contact in God’s Word. Create family rhythms with the following actions:
Read God’s Word around the table, before bed, in the car.
Memorize God’s Word together. Try to memorize one each month of the year. Begin with Psalm 119:11 “I have hidden your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.” This is how you shape arrows to bend curves and skim on water.
Sing God’s Word. This is one of the most effective and proven techniques to memorize God’s Word. It’s a ton of fun, especially with young kids, to make up songs together. I recommend a great resource called slugs and bugs!
Pray God’s Word. Pray the prayers written in God’s Word. Read the promises that God gives to his people.
I understand that this might feel daunting, but there are dozens of great resources available to guide kids across all ages and stages to become familiar with and fulfilled by God’s Word. I’ve listed several tried and true resources in the message notes on the app, but may I also recommend speaking with our outstanding kids ministry leaders and student ministry leaders, as well as other parents in our village.
2. God’s Word is a manual for the warrior. In Paul’s second letter to Timothy, he wrote: “All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.” 2 Timothy 3:16-17.
Life apart from God’s Word leaves us lost on the trail. How do we expect to overcome the challenges of this life apart from God’s instruction? Intentional, incremental gains day over day, week over week yield giant gains in our spiritual growth year over year. The YouVersion bible App provides all kinds of accessible and engaging opportunities to grow in God’s Word to help our arrows learn how to fly against the winds of our culture.
Just this past weekend, I was with my kids at a birthday party, and sitting next to me was a young adult couple who appeared to be on a date together. I overheard the guy say a couple times to the girl, “I’m going to make something of my life without anyone telling me what to do.” I thought to myself, ‘ok, he’s obviously trying to impress the girl with him, but he’s also echoing one of the most fundamental values of our culture: rugged self-centered individualism: i am going to make it all happen myself. How many of us know how that story ends? This couldn’t be more opposite of God’s Word and why we need others in our lives.
The deeper your learning of God’s Word as your warrior field manual, the further your arrows will fly.
3. Last, God’s Word is like a flightpath for the arrow to follow.
Every arrow is flying toward a destination, but the real question is: does your arrow know the destination? Are you clear with them about how to live their best life according to God's word? With God’s help, are you seeking him in all you do so that you can launch your arrow to the best of your ability? As God says in Deuteronomy 6:6-7: Are you talking about God’s Word when you sit at home, when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up? Is your life an example of following God even when the road seems hard and narrow? Are you speaking the blessing of God’s unconditional love over your arrows to help them find and follow Christ?
This week, as we give our thoughtful consideration to each of these questions, may we all pray for the strength, courage, and wisdom to lead our arrows with a warrior heart. This is every warrior’s mission: to prepare our arrows to soar with God’s Word as our sandpaper, our manual, and our flightpath.
Let's pray.