Family Made | Family is God's Divine Design
Home Is Where Love Makes New • Sermon • Submitted • Presented
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· 1 viewSuitable - in front of, in sight of, opposite to. not subordinate or superordinate but matching a God-ordinated co-ordinate.
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#62
Today we begin a brand new series called “Family Made,” and our aim together over the next 6 weeks will be to invite God’s restoring power to renew your family. We can make this claim because of the central verse for this series from 2 Corinthians 5:17, so may I invite you to stand and read it along with me in one voice:
LED: 2 Corinthians 5:17, Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!
And with this truth guiding our way, Lord, may you soften our hearts and open our minds to your renewal in our lives and for our families. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen. [[[seat the congregation]]]
Now, I am aware that for some of us, the title “Family Made” is a snag. For some, family’s complicated. For others, family hasn’t made us but broken us. In fact, the words “Family Made” feel more like a dashed dream. Perhaps some of us used to believe this, but not anymore. Family has been a source pain and difficulty.
Others of us might call “Family Made” an impossible hope. You want it, but you see no way to get there from here. We’re all trying to feel our way through this journey together, and the good news is that God has provided a way, but it’s not a ‘fill in the blank.’ Do this, don’t do this. It’s more like a ‘learn as we go’ kind of journey, and I am right beside you on the trail. LED: Family Photo
As a parent of 4 children myself, I am simply one beggar telling some other beggars where to find bread. That is to say that I am with you. I’m not a perfect husband or a perfect father, but I am a new creation in Christ Jesus.
This is our trailhead into the next 6 weeks. If you know a family on the brink, then invite them with you during this series, and together let’s all open our hearts to become made new in Christ!
As a young man, I grew up in the Boy Scouts. And among the skills that our Scoutmasters regularly reinforced was map orienteering. Practicing this skill required our troop to go off-trail with nothing more than a LED: map, compass, pocket knife, and canteen
Our leaders would give us a starting location and then a geographical endpoint. That was all. Our mission was to lead our scoutmasters from point A to point Z. In my early days of orienteering, we looked like a straggling band of 12 year olds wandering aimlessly in the woods (of course with our leaders following behind us). We didn’t make much progress at first, but after years of consistent, steady learning, we made a 10 mile journey look like a walk in the park.
In many ways, family life feels like orienteering in the wilderness. We have a good map in God’s word, an accurate compass with his Spirit alive in us, and a heavenly vision for finishing the journey all the way to the very end! In between it all, though, there are a lot of unknowns, and unless we’re adequately prepared and walking with others, we can easily lose our way or worse.
As a scout, before every hike, our scoutmasters always made us say together the first rule of orienteering: LED: ‘never go alone.’ That same rule applies to your family: ‘never go alone.’ Many do, and too often the journey ends in pain and brokenness.
As we begin today, I want to invite you to take a self-assessment and consider this question: How would you describe the current state of your family right now, according to whatever season of life in which you find yourself?
Son or daughter…
Wife…
Mother…
Single father…
Grandparent…
Foster parent…
Fiancee preparing to begin a new family in marriage?
Whatever your role in whatever family style, how would you describe the current state of your family right now?
Are you alone on the trail?
Are you lost?
Is someone with you hurt and in need of care?
Are you making your way and able to help others on their journey?
This week, give your thoughtful consideration to this question, and invite God’s Spirit to give you truthful feedback. Perhaps, you may consider asking a trusted friend or mentor this question. Pray on this question. Ask God to show you areas in your family life that need his renewing love.
Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7:7-8
Throughout the next 6 weeks, ask, seek, and knock for God’s restoring power to renew your family.
When I first launched into ministry as a student pastor 12 years ago, I did a personal study on family systems throughout the Bible, and two insights quickly became apparent: First, God provided a sure way for how to live together in a family that honors him and blesses others. That’s the good news! And, Second, every family in scripture fell short of God’s way - Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebecca, even Mary and Joseph, to name a few - and so has every family since. Why? Because we all fall short of God’s way, so let’s not judge ourselves or others during this series.
Let’s resist the comparison trap. Every family has a story… Some are single. Some are blended. Some are divorced. Some are adopted. Some are foster. Some are multigenerational. AND ALL are welcome at the cross. If anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! 2 Corinthians 5:17.
Jesus welcomes every family and every person at the cross. No matter what your family style might look like or what your current circumstances might be. Every breath is a grace. Every day is a new mercy.
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Our starting point for discovering God’s way for our families begins… “In the beginning, God created...” Genesis 1:1.
God created the heavens and the earth.
God created every star and celestial body in the sky.
He created every living creature.
And God created our life together.
Woven into the fabric of God’s creation is the divine institution of family. In the final crescendo of God’s creative work before he rested, LED: God said, “Let us make human beings in our image, to be like us. They will reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, the livestock, all the wild animals on the earth, and the small animals that scurry along the ground.”
So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Then God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and govern it.” Genesis 1:26-28
In this passage, we notice first that God referred to himself using the plural term “Us.” What does that mean? The Hebrew term is ‘elohim,’ which is the plural form of god and literally means “gods,” but based on how we know God from the Bible, we know this word isn’t referring to God as multiple gods but, instead, as one God in three persons: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.
This is called the Trinity, and throughout history, God has revealed himself to us as one God in three unique and distinct persons.
God the Father Almighty who created everything seen and unseen and reigns over all creation.
God the Son, Christ Jesus, who is God incarnate, meaning in the flesh, and sent by the Father into the world to save us from our sin and reconcile our broken relationship back to right with our Heavenly Father.
And God the Holy Spirit, who came to us after Jesus ascended to his heavenly throne and helps us live our lives according to God’s way.
The Trinity is a marvelously deep and truly profound mystery. My theology professor in seminary called the Trinity the deepest and most beautiful doctrine of our faith.
One analogs that you might use to grasp this deep truth is to think about the Trinity like water. The water molecule is called H2O - two parts Hydrogen and one part oxygen - and this one molecule can exist in 3 different states, as a LED: liquid, solid, gas - as water, ice, and steam - the same H2O molecule in 3 unique states.
That is like our God, and as one God in three persons, God exists within himself, as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, in a perfect fellowship of love, for “God is love.” 1 John 1:8.
LED: As one God in three persons, God is perfectly whole, perfectly committed, and perfectly sustained in himself, and this same God created you in his image, to be like him, which means he created you in family to make you whole in a committed relationship with your family to sustain you throughout your life.
This is why God blessed man and woman and gave them the charge to multiply and govern, because love wants to grow and transform. In a few verses, God defines his best way for living together in family that I want to offer you today and let guide us over the next few weeks. That definition is this:
LED: God created you in love for love to join together with another in the sacred union of covenantal love between one man and one woman to form a family for God’s continued work of transforming love through you!
God created the family good. It was one of his best ideas. Family is God’s divine design. Therefore, building a family is a divine act. Has that been your experience? Would you call your home holy and set apart for God’s good work in the world? If not, then how would you define your family?
In the creation narratives, God models 6 keystones on which to build a family! Each week of this series will explore a different keystone in relationship to a family role.
LED:
Week 1- Presence - in all roles of the family
Week 2 - Perseverance - in marriages
Week 3 - Preparation - in raising children
Week 4 - Protection - in multigenerational family influence
Week 5 - Prayer - in Fatherhood
Week 6 - Participation - in Family Team Vision
Each one of these keystones apply to every member of the family. Everyone is responsible to uphold them, but certain family roles have greater influence than others in cultivating these keystones. Today, I want begin with the first keystone that God modeled: presence.
At the end of Jesus’ life, he said, “And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:20, NLT. Jesus is our Emmanuel. Emmanuel means God with us. That’s God’s promise to us in Christ Jesus. He is a ‘with you’ God, and in the same way that he models his presence to us through the love of the Father, grace of the Son, and fellowship of the Holy Spirit, your full faithful and loving presence at home models God’s presence alive in your life.
Your presence is priceless. It is the most important contribution that you can offer to your family. Your presence is worth more than all the treasures of this world. Nothing can substitute your presence.
I have a framed quote from Mother Teresa hanging directly in front of my desk, which reads: “If you want to change the world, then go home and love your family.” I see this quote a hundred times everyday, and it reminds me that my family is my first calling, my first responsibility, my first love, and my most influential platform to witness God’s kingdom grow in the world.
But this isn’t just true of Pastor Dad, it is true for every mom and dad, son and daughter, grandparent, aunt, uncle, cousin, and guardian. Love requires your presence to grow. Your presence opens the possibility for the other 5 keystones: perseverance, preparation, protection, prayer, and participation. Your family cannot experience these without first your active presence, even if you live physically apart from your family. Love grows only when you see, feel, and act for another, so reflect on this question:
How might your family experience the renewing love of Christ through your consistent presence?
My family of origin lives about a thousand miles that way, and when we go periods of time without showing up for one another, we feel the loss. We need each other’s presence, even if it means just hearing the other’s voice and seeing each other on Facetime. Of course, we miss the feel of each other’s physical embrace, but our presence together through whatever medium is priceless.
What made the Garden of Eden, the Garden of Delight - the meaning of the Hebrew term, Eden - was God’s up close and personal presence with man and woman. There was a mutual affection and intimacy that man and woman enjoyed with God and with each other that reflected the same affection and intimacy that God enjoys in himself as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. And though our sin has led us so far from Eden’s perfection, through Christ’s victory over sin and death, “God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts. Galatians 4:6, so now his presence dwells within us all the time.
Thus making your heart an outpost for Eden. An outpost is a remote site of a larger entity. In the military, an outpost is a small camp deep in the remote part of a region. In a similar way: Your heart is like an outpost for Eden, a remote site of God’s larger heavenly kingdom from where he reigns as king.
Don’t miss this: You carry Eden with you in your heart. In Christ, you hold God’s delight and life in you, which makes your presence a gift. Your love doesn’t need a bunch of bells and whistles. All your family needs is you.
You know, Miami isn’t an easy place to live like this. The last couple years have witnessed increased financial demands, longer working hours, and strained morality. Some of us right now might be weighing whether or not to raise kids in Miami. If the Lord leads you, however, to make your home here long term, then I thank God for this church and that we get to raise our kids together beside other men and women who desire the same Eden vision for our families as you do.
Your family needs your presence, and your family needs ours! God gave us the gift of this holy familia to navigate the dark and tumultuous waters of this life. We ‘never go alone.’ God gave us… us! He gave ‘us’ to us! And God gave us the presence his Spirit to live in every human heart who trusts in him! What families need most from every family member is presence, so show up in your family with:
LED: Your eyes. Your heart. And your hands.
What do I mean by this?
1. Lead with your eyes. Where your eyes go, the rest of you will follow, so if your eyes are on this [[[show a phone]]] or some other screen or buried in work or dazed in your nothing box, then you’re in proximity, but you’re not present. Move from proximity to presence.
Presence happens eye to eye. Try letting your eyes say I love you. Now, this might feel strange to look at your spouse or kids or parents in the eyes, but nothing says ‘you have my undivided attention’ more than looking at your family in the eyes.
2. Then, show up with your heart. Empathize with how another feels. This takes a risk because this means lowing your walls a bit, but the difference between living like a stonewall - guarded and deflective - and showing up fully present is the ability to connect your emotions with another’s. Proximity speaks the language of obligation. I’m around you because I have to be. Does anyone like being another person’s obligation? Of course not! No one wants to feel like a “have to.” Presence, however, speaks the language love. I’m here and I’m open to know and be known.
3. Last, show up with your hands open. How may I help? How may I support? What can I do? Showing up with your hands means showing with your physicality. Toss a ball. Place your hand on a shoulder. Stick a note in your child’s lunchbox. Stick a note in your dad’s wallet. Open the car door for your bride. Showing up with your hands open means being ready to do something, to act.
***[[[--- mom and the orange table ]]]
Here’s the point: LED: Be present. Love grows when a person sees, feels, and acts for another.
In showing up - not in proximity to - but with your committed and engaged presence, then you will begin to experience your family as an outpost of Eden, God’s delight, a place where heaven touches earth through the presence of God’s Spirit alive and renewing you. LED: If anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! 2 Corinthians 5:17.
Will you pray with me?