Mission of Reconciliation: The Cost
Notes
Transcript
Some of you know Pastor John Davis - pastor at Katy Memorial Lutheran Church. He tells the story of coming back from a work trip where he had been away for some time, and was so glad to get back home. Let me quote him here:
“Of course, when I get back home I am generally warmly greeted—by 1. Bailey, my grand dog. Now, Bailey is always happy to see me whenever I come home, but she also has a routine. She sniffs on my legs and my shoes and my hands, all in a pursuit to find out if I cheated on her while I was away—that is if I had been with or even worse, pet another dog. And if I have, there is a momentary pause in her greeting where she processes whether or not she is mad at me. Generally, she is not. For Bailey, the cost of reconciliation is a good rub on the head and a few sweet words. Until about a week ago, when I had to take her to the vet where the Dr. gave her some medicine. For Bailey, reconciling cost about $46.”
While I was in California, I had the opportunity to personally meet and take some classes with a professional reconciler as part of my duties as a pastor with the district. He’s part of a wonderful group of counselors and churchmen and women who help congregations reconcile in the midst of conflict. For this one congregation, the cost to reconcile is about $30,000. Seems steep doesn’t it. But what the cost reveals is the value placed on reconciliation.
For those of you estranged from a child or a grandchild, from a parent or grandparent, from a sibling, how much would you pay—how much would you give up to be reconciled? For some of you, perhaps the hurt is so great that you wouldn’t give much. The cost for you is less monetary than it is an emotional cost, the price being the reliving of past hurts, digging up pain long covered up but still there, the risk of losing new identities, the fear of being hurt again. Such costs are not easily measured, but their weight can be enormous.
For others of you in such a situation, you would give anything. Meet them for dinner? Pick the place. Fly to meet them somewhere? I’m making my reservations. Do both of those things multiple times? In a heartbeat.
The cost of reconciliation can often be significant – emotionally, financially, physically, mentally, socially, and more. And
the greater the cost, the more challenging it is to reconcile. For some, it’s worth it, for some it’s not. For some it’s too much, for some it’s not and it could never be. Or better yet, as we learned last week, For some, the person is worth reconciling with, and for some the person is not. Do these words sound familiar: “I’m not going to shed another tear over him again;” “I’ve tried more than once, but she’s just not worth it;” “I know it’s going to be painful to go back there, but he’s my father, she’s my mother.”
So, what does God say to us? “You’re worth it. You are worth the cost. And if the cost reveals the value of reconciliation and hence the value of the person and the relationship with them. Then, God says to us, “You’re worth everything.” And he didn’t just say it, he showed it when he sent Jesus into the World, sent his own Son, to live among sinners like us, to reach out to them with love and mercy when love and mercy was so desperately needed. But also to challenge them to let go of their pride and their sense of self-worth (their inflated value of themselves and deflated value of others), to let go their old divisions and let go of worldly limitations (seventy x seven)--you know, the things that are often barriers to reconciliation with others. 6. Jesus’ was a mission of reconciliation to reconcile sinners to God and then move them to reconcile with others. Jesus’ mission was to bring you back to the Father, bring you, but also the you next to you. You were worth it to the Father. You were worth it to Jesus. You were worth every false accusation, worth every time someone spit on him, beat upon him, every lash with the whip, worth every nail, every agonizing breath, worth the pain of watching your own Son submit himself and sacrifice himself in such a way, worth the pain of having your Father reject His only Son instead of people who didn’t even know and didn’t even care that you existed. You were worth such an incredible cost to God. And so too was your neighbor. And they still are.
The apostle Paul, with whom Jesus reconciled even after he was having his followers killed, got this. He understood how great a cost the Father and the Son both paid to overcome his, Paul’s sin and hostility and conflicts with himself, with others, and even with God. He was transformed by the reconciling grace of God, mercy and love so desperately needed but undeserved. Mercy and love so great that it moved him beyond just receiving God’s gift of reconciliation—just being reconciled to God—to bringing God’s gift of reconciliation to others, being God’s ambassador of reconciliation. For him reconciliation was his mission.
And the cost was great. Paul wrote: as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: by great endurance, in afflictions, hardships, calamities, 5 beatings, imprisonments, riots, labors, sleepless nights, hunger… 8 through honor and dishonor, through slander and praise. We are treated as impostors, and yet are true; 9 as unknown, and yet well known; as dying, and behold, we live; as punished, and yet not killed; 10 as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, yet possessing everything.
Guys, I can’t tell you enough how valuable and precious you are to God. You are the treasure hidden in the field for which God gave all he had to buy the whole field. You are the pearl of great price, for which God gave up all he had to buy you. For you the Father gave up His Son. For you, Jesus, the Son gave up his own life. 8.But God needs you to see that this is also how valuable and precious your neighbor is to God. How valuable and precious to God is the one with whom you’re not speaking, the one who is stuck in their own prison of unforgiveness and needs someone to make the first move, the one whom by worldly standards you would have every reason to move on from and give up on (just like God reasonably could have, should have given up on us). God needs you to be that ambassador of reconciliation for them, not for your sake, not for any worldly gain, but to carry out this mission even at great cost.
Now, I can’t say exactly what that cost might be to you. Maybe it won’t be imprisonment, but it might be sleepless nights. Maybe it won’t be beatings, but it might be hardships or slander. It quite likely could bring a lot of sorrow and tears. You might even be accused of being a phony, an impostor, just trying to make yourself feel better. They might bring up all you have done, whether real or perceived. They might scowl at you, scoff at you, snarl at you, or even swat at you. And just as possible is others might do that to you for even trying.
Jesus said, 9. “Do you think that I have come to give peace on earth? No, I tell you, but rather division. 52 For from now on in one house there will be five divided, three against two and two against three. 53 They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.” And Jesus experienced what he said himself. Not until after the resurrection did his own brothers believe him. And before the resurrection, on the cross, even his own Father rejected him as he became sin for us.
Reconciling with others in the name of Jesus, and bringing God’s reconciliation to those who would react against it does not come without cost. It might cost you a lot of tears, heartache, time and money. It might cost you other relationships. But two things I want to leave you with. 1) Jesus said you were worth all of that to him and more. And Jesus said the one you are reconciling with or the one you are bringing God’s reconciliation to or both, is worth the same. And 2) You are not alone. Jesus promised to be with you always. And he is. He does know the cost of reconciliation (He knows the cost of reconciliation), and you won’t have to bear it alone. Even in sorrow, his promises will allow you to still rejoice. Even when you lose much, you will gain more and actually be able to give more. Give more of what God gave to you no matter the cost to him. Amen.