The Family
Notes
Transcript
Intro
Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.
Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.
Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Bondservants, obey in everything those who are your earthly masters, not by way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord.
Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,
knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.
For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.
Masters, treat your bondservants justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven.
Husbands & Wives
Husbands & Wives
Wives Submit To Your Husbands
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.
Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
What Submission does not mean:
Does not mean that the wife is inferior to the man.
Does not mean that the wife is a slave to her husband.
What Submission does mean:
God has given an order to the family.
A wife submits to or respects her husband by:
Allowing him to lead.
As opposed to forcing him to follow.
Partnering with him in the process.
As opposed to being disengaged with the life of the family.
Supporting and challenging him.
As opposed to scorning him and allowing him to fail.
Ultimately, I don’t believe that many wives are actually opposed to biblical submission.
They are opposed to the distortion of submission that the world has portrayed it to be. As well as is sometimes perpetuated by churches.
Respecting, partnering with, and following a man that is chasing after God is not an objectionable command.
This is why who you marry is so important. You should not marry someone that you are not willing to submit to.
One word on wives who find themselves in a situation where their husband does not believe, or exercise his faith.
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,
when they see your respectful and pure conduct.
Husbands Love Your Wives
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,
because we are members of his body.
This idea of loving your wife is not just a state of “I love my wife.” It is an active engagement in loving your wife.
The example given is Christ loving the church.
The sinful perspective of the world, the old ball and chain. Marriage is like a jail sentence.
This means that husbands love their wives by:
Sacrificing for them.
As opposed to sacrificing them.
Caring for them.
As opposed to neglect.
Protecting them.
As opposed to harming them.
Nourishing them.
As opposed to letting them wither.
I am hard on men here. I don’t believe the problem that we have in this country is that women don’t biblically submit.
The problem is that not only are many men not worthy of submitting to, they don’t lead in any distinguishable way.
In the vast majority of cases, men are the ones who stay home and can’t be bothered to attend church.
You rarely see married men bring their children to church while the wives stay home, you commonly see it the other way. (excluding working and obligations)
Summing it Up
However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
For a marriage to be most successful. Each person must seek to be the best they can be, rather than seeking to critique and correct the other.
If you are hearing this today and you echo with what you are hearing, I want to be respected, I want to be loved. The first place to look is at yourself.
Husbands should seek to be someone worthy of respect.
All of Scripture and especially Proverbs is filled with what it means to be a man of God.
Better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble with it.
Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fattened ox and hatred with it.
A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.
The way of a sluggard is like a hedge of thorns, but the path of the upright is a level highway.
When you are someone who doesn’t live in a respectable way, how can you expect your wife to respect you?
Wives should seek to be someone that is a easy to love.
We have all met people that are difficult to get along with. The first place you should strive to be easy to get along with is in your marriage.
It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife.
When you are combative with your husband, you should understand that it can be difficult to experience the love you might want from your husband.
Husbands love your wives when they are unlovable.
If your love for your wife is to be like Christ’s love for the church, it should be love that is not dependent upon her actions, but is for her benefit.
Your love in unlovable circumstances will draw them near to God and near to you.
Wives respect your husbands when they aren’t respectable.
When you submit in these circumstances, you remind them of who they ought to be, and you honor the Lord.
One word on wives who find themselves in a situation where their husband does not believe, or exercise his faith. 1 Peter 3:1-2
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,
when they see your respectful and pure conduct.
Communication is key:
I feel respected when you… I don’t feel respected when you...
I feel loved when you… I don’t feel loved when you...
You are on the same team.
It is clear in the world that many marriages are not content. 41% of first marriages end in divorce.
If you are not ready to play your respective role in a marriage, you should not marry.
Marriage does restrict you
Marriage does give you more responsibility
A biblical marriage will nourish you
A biblical marriage will be a source of God’s grace and blessing in your life.
A biblical marriage is where children should be raised.
Children & Parents
Children & Parents
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
“Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise),
“that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
Children obey your parents.
Your parents are the God given authority over you.
Your parents have your best in mind.
Your obedience honors God.
Fathers do not provoke your children.
Fathers should be respected by their children, but this respect should not come through fear of retribution.
Father’s should love them and guide them.
Bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
This is the stewardship that is given to parents.
Your children are not yours, they belong to the Lord. Raise them in a way where they follow him faithfully.
What is your greatest desire for your children? It should be that they would know and follow the Lord. When you grow old and near the end of your life, you will not be worried about:
The total net worth of your children.
Their academic achievements
How they did in sports.
Their hobbies.
You will be concerned about what kind of people they are.
You will be concerned about whether they know the Lord.
Too many parents grow into their aged years wishing that their children followed the Lord.
Raising your kids in the discipline and instruction of the Lord is not a guarantee that they will follow God.
However, we should not be surprised when children grow up to not make their faith a priority, if it is not made a priority in the way they were raised.
Bondservants & Masters
Bondservants & Masters
Bondservants, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling, with a sincere heart, as you would Christ,
not by the way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart,
rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man,
knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a bondservant or is free.
Masters, do the same to them, and stop your threatening, knowing that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and that there is no partiality with him.
Slavery was a different situation than what we have in our minds
Not an endorsement of the institution.
Application to employees and employers today.
If you are a person who is under authority
Work with a sincere heart, as you would to Christ.
Not eye service, not people pleasers, but as those under the authority of Christ doing his will from the heart.
As if you work for the Lord and not for man.
Those with authority, remember the authority over you and treat people fairly, because you are no better than them.