Jesus and Divorce
A Look at the Sermon on the Mount • Sermon • Submitted
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We are back in Matthew 5, looking at the Sermon on the Mount, and really and truly, if you have ever wished there was a “How-To Manuel” for godly living, then look no further than Matthew 5-7! This may not answer every single question you have about godly living, but it will come close!
The last time we were together we looked at the heart issue surrounding adultery. Long before someone enters into an illicit affair they first have set their heart away from their spouse and toward someone else. Adultery is by far the leading cause of divorce in America. The divorce rate is around 50%, with nearly 75% of those divorcing citing infidelity as the cause.
I do not think it is coincidence that Jesus first mentions adultery, and immediately enters a discussion on divorce. What a controversial topic, even in churches, is divorce. Nearly 50% of all marriages, including Christian marriages, end in divorce. There are a plethora of opinions out there regarding divorce, but we’re not interested in any of those! No today we are going to plumb the depths of what God in His Word says about this topic, for instance look at Matthew 5:31-32
31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: 32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
We are going to look at this topic tonight by asking, “Is it ever within the will of God to divorce?” To answer this question we must understand there are two aspects regarding God’s Will. You will notice first there is...
God’s Perfect Will
God’s Perfect Will
Before we get into our text, let’s go on a journey, turn to Matthew 19:3-6
3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? 4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Jesus’ answer to the Pharisees settles the question about divorce in the perfect will of God. It is God’s perfect will that marriage be permanent. To prove this Jesus quotes Genesis 2:24
24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
The word “leave” in Genesis 2 indicates God intended the marriage to the final step toward adulthood. To leave your parents has the idea that you are no longer dependent upon them. It is very evident that homes in which the in-laws have too much influence can be problematic.
Couple the word leave with the “cleave unto his wife...” the the word “leave” indicates separation. The word “cleave” refers to “be glued or fastened to”. God’s perfect plan for marriage is that it be permanent!
Now let me be fair. The idea that anyone who is divorces is outright choosing to live in a lifestyle of rebellion against God and they are the biggest sinner out there is wrong. To say that there is never a reason to divorce, or never a situation in which God will permit divorce is wrong.
While God’s perfect will is for marriage to be permanent, and while God’s perfect will includes husbands and wives loving one another and forgiving one another, and while there is nothing out there that God cannot forgive, God understands we are imperfect creatures and therefore we often fail to live up to His perfect plan. This leads us to the second aspect of God’s will. You notice...
God’s Permissive Will
God’s Permissive Will
I want to read two portions of Scripture and then comment on each of them together.
Matthew 5:31-32 “31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: 32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.”
Matthew 19:7-9 “7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.”
You will notice in both of these sections, Jesus gives and “exception” clause. This comes from Deuteronomy 24:1
1 When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house.
Now some commentators and many modern preachers like to make a distinction between fornication and adultery. They claim that fornication refers to sins committed outside of marriage, while adultery refers to sexual sins committed while married. In truth, fornication as used by Jesus is very similar as the word “uncleaness” used by Moses.
Fornication = harlotry.
So is Jesus urging divorce in this situation? Is it God’s will to divorce in these cases? Let me ask you this, is it God’s will for you to be unfaithful? Or would it be God’s will for you to never forgive your spouse for cheating? The answer to all of these situations is no.
God’s will is for your marriage to last forever. God’s will is for you to be faithful to your partner, BTW, if you’re unfaithful to your partner, you’re unfaithful to God. It is God’s will for us to forgive one another as He constantly forgives us!
So what then is the point of Jesus’ words? It is simple really. God has made a provision for His imperfect creatures in tolerating divorce, but divorce is never in His perfect will.
Conclusion: Marriage is important to God, and therefore should be important to us as well! It should be guarded, and of all things on this earth it should be fought for! No one should go to divorce court laughing and giggling, but instead kicking and screaming. And I don’t mean arguing, I mean to say they should go against their will.
“What if I’ve divorced for reasons other than fornication and remarried?” Let me be as plain as Scripture is: You divorced for the wrong reasons. “What do I do?” Confess your sin. But guess what? That improper divorce, it’s in the past! We’re living in the present. If you have divorced and remarried, then pour all of your energy into this marriage. Love God and love your spouse. Don’t dwell in the past, live right here right now, and give your marriage all you’ve got!
“What if my marriage is rocky?” Listen, we could play the “What if” game all night long, but let me leave you with this: Your marriage is worth fighting for. Don’t give up.