1 Corinthians 7:1–9 - Naked & Unashamed

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Introduction

Opening Illustration: Naked & Unashamed to Hidden & Fearful

In the early chapters of Genesis, we are introduced to the very first marriage.
Genesis 2:20-25 “20… But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”
That language, naked and unashamed, is vital language in understanding this first marriage and God’s design for marriage. Adam and Eve had total vulnerability before each other. They were not hidden. They had no need to be hidden. One person fully exposed to another. This exposure was met with a God-centered love,. Therefore it says that they were unashamed. Totally exposed with nothing to hide and nothing to fear. But things would stay this way for long. By the end of Genesis chapter three sin has crept its way into Adam and Eve’s heart. We find Adam and Eve trembling with fear. Interestingly , when confronted by God they respond,
Genesis 3:10 “10 And he said, “I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.””
Naked & unashamed has become naked and full of fear. Exposed before God, exposed before each other, now with sin in the midst of it all, and all they can do is hide, trembling. By the end of chapter three the beauty of naked and unashamed is lost.
Genesis 3:21 “21 And the Lord God made for Adam and for his wife garments of skins and clothed them.”
And just like that, the beauty and the vulnerability of that very first marriage, was marred. What could possibly restore it?

Context

The theme of today’s text is Marriage, particularly we’ll be discussing sex within marriage. It should not need much belaboring of the point to demonstrate that the outside world, the world beyond the Church, has incredibly broken views of marriage. Marriage has become for many in our culture a self-aggrandizing game. The nuclear family is no longer the foundational building block of our society. That’s out there. But inside the Church, many marriages within the Church struggle to find that level of intimacy they long for. Many marriages within the Church fall into unhealthy rhythms, knowing and longing for more, but not quite sure what that more might be, or how they might go about obtaining it. In today’s passage Paul is going to focus on a question that the Corinthian Church asked him particularly about sex as Christians. But in teaching about sex, Paul ends up painting a glorious picture of what Biblical marriage can be.

Context & Setup

Paul begins this section by quoting from a letter that he had received from them earlier. He writes,
1 Corinthians 7:1 “1 Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.””

What Was Likely Happening in the Church

There are likely a host of situations happening here. It seems that there is a group of followers of Christ who are married in Corinth, who have taken the belief that true holiness requires abstinence from sex. They were seeking a form ‘asceticism’ in which you deprive yourself of certain pleasures in order to honor God. And so likely this group was gaining ground in the Church and a number of other married couples were in the Church saying, “Is that true?” It could also be as we see in next week’s message, that perhaps there was a situation where there were a few believing spouses in the Church that had nonbelieving husbands or wives. And now the believing Church-going spouse is coming home to their spouse saying, “Yeah, I’m not supposed to have sexual relations any more.” You can see how that would be problem as well.

Context of Sexual Practices In Corinth

Additionally, we have to remember a bit of the context of Corinth. Corinth is renowned for its sexual promiscuity. It was a port town and so sailors would regularly be filling the streets. It boasted a massive temple to Aphrodite who was the Goddess of Love. Hundreds of Temple Prostitute would be working the vicinity of that temple, but then also spread out throughout the city in brothels. Beyond the specific excesses of Corinth specifically, there was just the sexual ethic of Greco/Roman society of the 1st century.
Many-Woman-Man: In those days it was common practice on the wedding night to inform the bride that when her husband would sleep with prostitutes in the future, it was not a sign that he did not love her, but simply a way of gratifying his passions.
Wives Position As Sex: Women were virtually unconsidered in conversations on sex, and wives functioned essentially as one who exists to please her husband.
Homosexuality: Homosexuality was prevalant among men.
Pedagogical Pederasty: It was also common for men to engage in romantic and sexual relationships with young boys. Now that might sound insane and disturbing, but it was a normal way of life.
Into that culture, steps this new Church, a group of people set on following Jesus. And they’re looking at the sexual perversions of the culture around them, and they have questions on what do we do with sex now that we’re Christians. Legitimate question. Paul steps into the confusion of this early Church and presents a clear and beautiful image of God’s vision of sexuality. Paul might be summarzed this way: Sex is God's good gift designed for the lifelong covenant of marriage. The Apostle then lays out three reasons why this is the case.

Reason 1: Sex According to God’s Design Helps Fight Against Ungodly Temptation

Reason 1: Sex According to God’s Design Helps Fight Against Ungodly Temptation
1 Corinthians 7:2 “2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.”

The Word “Temptations” is Porneias

Paul does not hide the fact that humans as designed by God have a sexual drive inside of them, and that in a fallen world like the one we live in, that sexual drive can and often does lead many into all types of temptation. In a city like Corinth, the temptation would be too short circuit God’s design for marriage by taking what is cheap and easy just like everyone else in the city. Paul lays out the clear command to not settle for cheap imitations of sexual fulfilment. Don’t give into the tempation with some form of porneia (sex outside of marriage), thinking it will satisfy the drive, the way the drive was meant to be satisfied.

Song of Solomon

Many are surprised to learn that the Bible has an entire book dedicated to the sexual romantic relationship. It is the X rated depiction of the beauty of sex within marriage. Two lines are repeated in this book. The first sounds like this,
Song 2:7 “7 I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.”
That is a poetic way of saying, “I beg of you young women, don’t cheat yourself by enjoying sex outside of the covenant of marriage. It will not satisfy you. It will only break you.” A few verses later we read,
Song 2:15 “15 Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom.””
This is a metaphor to say that if you let the foxes into the vineyard, if you entertain sex before the right time with the wrong people, the vineyard will be spoiled. But at the same time, it also says that sex is like a vineyard to be enjoyed in the right way.

Illustration: The Knot

According to The Knot, a website dedicated to orchestrating details of weddings, the average age of folks getting married in 2021 was 34 years old. Commenting on this, the article wrote,
"People are taking longer to find themselves, which is a good thing. By the time people are getting married, they have a better sense of who they really are, meaning they're more secure in their career and their sense of self the older they get. And that helps them make good decisions with their life partner… Life is not so traditional anymore. Many couples are both working, therefore they are getting married for the first time later."
What we see in this cultural trajectory is a lowering of the value of marriage. For most who take this survey, the way they deal with the sexual tempation is to just give into it. They let the little foxes in, and the results are tragic, and are evident all over our communities. Paul’s advice is wise. To young single people, don’t linger in sexual tempation, but if you are able, get married.

Singleness Is a Gift

But marriage is not the only gift in this passage. If you go down just a bit to 1 Corinthians 7:6-9, we read,
1 Corinthians 7:6-9 “6 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. 7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. 8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”
Paul, in verse 7 also refers to singleness as a gift. He says one person has the gift of singleness while another has the gift of marriage. I want to speak into singleness for a moment as I think the Church has done a poor job of elevating singleness to the degree that Paul elevates it. Paul here does not elevate singleness above marriage, as if the truly spiritual people are the ones who are able to stay single. No, he says each have their own gift. Singleness is a gift.

Single But Don’t Want to Be

There are two types of single people in this room. Those who are joyfully content in their singleness, who truly are living in the gift of singleness. And there are those who are single not by choice, but just because of the path life has taken. To you I want to say that God sees you. He knows the longings of your heart. You are not forgotten. Your desires matter to God as well. Continue to look to Jesus your savior, and do not be discouraged. His answers often come in surprising ways and suprising times.

How Singleness Is a Gift

I am a married man. Each day, when my work is done, I come home to my priorities, my wife and my children. They need me to be present with them. But I know single folks who utilize their evenings so strategically for the Kingdom of God. Their singleness has opened up doors for ministry that I will never be in. By the same way, my marriage has opened up doors of ministry that they will never be in. Singleness is also a wonderful gift, and those who have that gift ought to steward it for the kingdom of God. But those who do not have that gift, ought to marry to enjoy the gift of marriage.
Review: Reason 1 Sex is a Good Gift From God Reserved for Marriage is— It Help to Fight Against Temptation

Reason 2: An Opportunity to Serve Your Spouse

The second reason paul gives is that sex is an opportunity to serve your spouse
1 Corinthians 7:3 “3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband.”
The language that is used here is that of “owing” one another something. The wife should give to her husband what she owes him. And the husband should give to the wife what he owes her. That might sound strange to our modern ears, but it is actually incredibly beautiful. Paul is doing two things here that need to be clearly stated.

The Woman is Elevated

First, notice how he elevates the woman from her place in society. He’s in the middle of a conversation on sex speaking to people living in Corinth where women were essentially primarily often considered sex machines for men in culture. And here in one sentence Paul levels the playing field. And says that in a marriage both the husband and the wife are worthy of enjoying sex.

Sex Is To be Enjoyed

Second, notice how he radically goes against the historic “religious” idea that unfortunately the Church held for many years, that sex is simply a necessary dirty act of the flesh that must be completed for the sake of procreation. THis was leftover from Aristotle who viewed the things of the flesh as naturally worldly or fleshly. Paul, at nowhere in this entire section mentions procreation. Of course that is a very important component of sex, and one of the reasons it must be maintained within marriage. But Paul’s point here is pleasure. He elevates sexual intimacy as something beautiful for both the husband and the wive, and something that they should enjoy.

A Concern for the Other Person

Notice what this verse is saying though. It is within the confines of marriage where there is a genuine conern for the other person. Paul is considering this other-oriented concern thorugh the lens of sex. But the entirety of Biblical marriage resonates with this same tone. Marriage is the coming together of two people where each person dies to themselves in order to serve the other person. In marriage you learn how to care for another person at their worst, and how to be cared for at your worst. In marriage you learn how to love and how to be loved, up close and personal. The way I put it in weddings I officiate is that in marriage two people look at each other and see the other person in all of their beauty and all of their weakness. And each person says, “I see what you could become if I give my life to serving you. And no matter what comes, I commit to doing just that.” Into that context, and only into that context, can two people begin to restore the idea of being Naked & Unashamed.

Why Sex Outside of Marriage is High Risk

Why is that? Sex outside of marriage can never achieve ‘Naked & Unashamed.’ It may feel like it does for a season. But the reality is that without the covenant of marriage, the other partner can choose to leave at any time. If you change too much, or if they change too much, they can choose to leave. Into that environment the idea of being fully vulnerable, fully exposed, is a tremendously fearful thing because you take the highest risk of exposing yourself in the most intimate of ways, and have no safety that the person truly cares for you enough to walk you through death itself.

Quote: Percy Shelley

All across our culture we are seeing the sad fruit of decades and generations of an effort to tear down the Biblical vision of Marriage. The idea of no-fault divorce, of making abortion a women’s right in order to feed “sexual freedom,” of the entire concept of sexual liberation as we know it in our culture today did not arrive out of nowhere. It has been a slow build for many generations. The French Poet Percy Shelly caught the seeds of our modern sentiment towards how we view marriage in this quote. She said,
If happiness is the object of morality… if the worthiness of every action is to be estimated by the quantity of pleasurable sensation it is calculated to produce, then the connection of the sexes is so long sacred as it contributes to the comfort of the parties, and is naturally dissolved when its evils are greater than its benefits. There is nothing immoral in this separation.”
She believed the purpose of life is personal happiness which is defined as “pleasurable sensations.” Marriage therefore as an institution must serve that end. And when it stops serving that end, it no longer has a function. She would go on to laugh at making lifelong vows as something that binds a person and precludes personal growth. She suggested that a lifelong vow of monogomy creates an “inauthentic existence.” Christianity for Shelley, and many others like her, became the great institution that must be torn down to free human beings from their shackles for the pursuit of the authentic self.

The Biblical Vision

But in all their efforts to redefine the human experience, to break free from God’s vision, they only every got more pain, more heartache, more depression, more counseling, more drugs to numb the pain. The Bible offers something far superior. A marriage is the place where total vulnerability meets total commitment. No matter how you change or how the other person changes. In sickness and in health. In prosperity or adversity. They’ve committed to serving you. Into that context, and only into that context can Naked & Unashamed can be restored.

Reason 3: A Symbol of Oneness

Paul’s third reason for the Biblical vision of marriage is the symbol of oneness. He says in verse 4
1 Corinthians 7:4-5 “4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”
This again would have been startling language to its first century hearers. They would have read the first part about a wife not have authority over her own body, and said, “Yes! That’s right!” But then they would have gotten to the second half where the husband does not have authority over his own body but gives that authority to her husband, and they would have gasped.

Mutual Concern for the Other’s Desires

Paul’s advice here is double-sided in the most beautiful way. On the one side, both the husband and the wife offer themselves up to their spouse when the spouse desires. But at the exact time, both the husband and wife are not only thinking about their own desires but about the other’s as well. There is a mutual concern, and a mutual love for one another. In a loving Biblical marriage, each person willingly gifts their whole life, their whole body, over to the other person. They say, “I trust you fully. I’m yours.” And that willing trust is then matched by an equal willing trust that says, “I’m yours fully too. I care for you, more than I care for myself. And I’ll give my life to prove it if need be.”

Do Not Deprive One Another Except for Fasting

This idea is so strong that Paul says the only reason a married couple should deprive one another of sex, is for an intentional season of fasting and pursuing God. But that even that season ought to be kept to a short period of time in order to not give Satan a chance to sneak into the relationship.

Abuse of this Passage

Before I bring us home, it is worth noting that this passage can and has been abused in two different ways. One way is that one partner, often the husband, will abuse this passage by requiring sex on demand, or sex in some way that makes the other partner feel unsafe. This is such an egregious breaking of this passage which is so full of mutual love and concern for the other person. At the same time, withholding sex from a spouse is a literal game that happens in many marriages. And it has been the cause of many temptations. A healthy, beautiful sex life within marriage is the best antidote to sexual temptation.

The Theme of Oneness

These abuses distort the Gospel. Remember that Biblical marriage is a picture of the Gospel. Recall that in the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve were made for intimacy and safety, naked and unashamed. But sin and all of its consequences robbed them of that glory they had with God and with each other. At the end of Genesis 3 you are left with an ache in your heart and a glimmer of hope that one day God will restore what was lost. And then Christ, the great Groom of the Church, appeared. He pursued His bride. He met her in her weakness. He healed her. He comforted her. He spoke tenderly to her. And he gave his life for her to finally, once and for all, remove barrier of sin between us and God. When we place our faith in Jesus, we join in the great marriage of Christ and His Church, where we are restored to that Edenic state of being Naked and Unashamed. In Christ we are fully known in all of our sin, in all of our weakness. And in Christ, we are fully loved for all of our debt has been paid on the cross.

Quote: Gregory of Nyssa

Gregory of Nyssa commenting on this reality says,
“Never again, after all this, will Adam blush when you call him, never will he try to hide because his conscience reproaches him, never will he seek concealment under the trees in the garden… For us that were heirs to [Adam’s] sin, all has been changed to rejoicing; for man now has access to paradise and even to heaven itself. The whole creation, heaven and earth, is at one again in friendship, its former differences forgotten… There is no doubt who it is that dresses the bride in her finery: it is, of course, Christ—he that is and was and will be.”—Gregory of Nyssa
Every marriage in Christ is a reflection of that greater marriage. Every marriage in Christ reveals to each other that restoration of naked and unashamed. This is why sex is God's good gift designed for the lifelong covenant of marriage.

Closing Illustration: Chuck German

Let me close with a quick story. My wife’s 84 year old grandparents have been married for 65 years. It has been a love story for the ages. As they’ve gotten older their love of Christ has grown tremendously. On vacation with them you’ll often find her grandfather reading scripture to her grandmother, praying for the family members and all the grandchildren together. Faithfulness. His dear bride had a stroke a few years ago, and recently slipped and hit her head pretty bad. She’s been in the hospital. This husband. This man, wakes up early every day in order to be at his wife’s side the moment her eyes wake up. He stays by her side day and night until visiting hours are over. He’s serving her. She is his beloved.

If You Want it, It’s Yours

It sounds a lot like Christ to me. May every married spouse strive to look like Christ to their beloved.
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